Newbies Nest

[Lavande]

Good Sunday morning Nesters!

I'm the first one to rise & shine, ha ha!!!

Wishing everyone a wonderful AF day ahead!

Lav

[LilBit]

Great way to handle a cake-mergency, Byrdie. So beautiful!

Lav and Pav, pull up a sofa cushion for T-day. The one who sits on the end gets to hold the cat.

Lav, it warms my heart to see you enjoying time with your family so much. What lucky grandkids you have. The love and attention you're able to give them is absolutely priceless. I'm of the opinion that most people today don't feel loved & valuable, and/or don't know who they are, which causes a lot of the world's problems. Grandma-time is a surefire cure for that.

I'm forcing myself to take today off, even though the work is stacked up behind me. The old LilBit would have plowed through it, made some headway, realized that the pile is so big it barely made a dent and then sought solace in a bottle for the inevitable feelings of anxiety, futility and underlying resentment for being in the situation in the first place. 'Not "New and Improved LilBit!" I'm baking some bread. Then I'm getting some outdoor exercise and maybe meeting up with friends for a laugh and a frothy cappuccino.

'Wishing everyone a lovely Sunday, too.

[j-vo]

Good morning. Thank you all for your thoughtful responses. It really helps a ton.

STL, congrats on your two weeks. Keep your tools in place. We can do this.

So I'm 34 days today. For some reason when I'm on iPad I can't copy and paste in roll call, and it's probably some little stupid button I'm not pressing. Technology!

Today, I leave to go back north. Mom is doing ok, yet still really tired. I'm blessed to be able to come at such a critical time and even more grateful I could be sober through it. Thank you all for your thoughts. :love:

[LilBit]

STL, congrats on your two weeks! The beginning is the hardest part, IMO, so you have a good foundation. Do you have a plan to make it through the holiday?

[LilBit]

J-Vo, I've been following your posts and hope things go well with your mom. Don't worry, at almost 9 months I can definitely say that it gets easier and the frequency of times that I even think about AL has greatly diminished. Doesn't mean we can ever let our guard down, but I've been through some rather tough stuff since quitting and the "I don't drink" attitude/taking AL off the table as an option has served me well thus far. Keep the faith!

[KENSHO]

It's breezy here in AZ. Can hardly peel my eyes open - what a week! Excited kids are already at the foot of the bed, and I smell coffee wafting up the stairs. I'm gonna need it. Could be an interesting week with hubby's family AND my mom & step-dad visiting. I'm grateful for the amicable relationship, but being in the same house will pronounce everyone's differences - I hope it goes well. And no matter what happens, all k have to do is not drink - something only I can control. I was remembering the party ways of our past last night, and it tugged at me a bit. That was the past.

My heart goes out to those who are struggling... Sending big thankful hugs to you all. Day 3 here.

[lifechange]

Happy Sunday, Nesters!
I've been following along here, liking everything written, but not contributing so much.. not really sure why.?
Last night I had such a close call and it was very helpful to read here, in the Toolbox, hang out at the Cowboy Café.. as I was falling to sleep, you were all in my mind. I was able to name off all of the people who spend time here, working on creating new lives for themselves.
Kensho, your posts the past few days and the responses to them (and Over-it's question of why don't I drink?) helped me out enormously.. on Friday I couldn't imagine ever having such bad cravings again and yesterday, out of nowhere, I couldn't imagine NOT drinking, anything to get rid of the craving. I thought I would go through the roof or jump out the window.. Knowing that I'm not alone, that someone might/does understand.. then reading posts from Lilbit and Pav and Ava and Lav and Byrdie and Matt and Cowboy, etc., etc.. all the plans for the Un-hung days, how wonderful life can be, how simple and beautiful. That was all enough (plus deep breathing, not going out again, eating TONS, hugging my daughters and their friends, calling my mom) to get me through.. and I am so happy today that I didn't give in. And I pray that I will do the same thing next time.. I felt a click in my mind last night, as I finally, truly made the decision that I wouldn't drink.. I knew then, that I was stronger.

STL, Congratulations on 2 weeks! I also hate alcohol.. I feel fortunate this year that I live in a place where T-Day isn't celebrated.. Every once in a while I end up visiting my parents and every single time I'm sick as a dog.. not just from drinking but from over-consuming in general. Who will you be spending the day with? Will you feel tempted or pressured to drink? Do you have a good plan set up? I loved Byrdie's post the other day with all the possible scenarios where one might get caught up.. My problem area would definitely be all the half full glasses sitting around, especially during clean up time. ughhh..

Well, it's almost 430pm here and I'm sitting in my jammies with a warm water bottle getting ready to watch Netflix! There's snow on the roof tops and I'm happy to be cozy warm inside..
Wishing you all a relaxing Sunday..

[lifechange]

X-Post Kensho!
I'm so envious of your visit to Arizona.. that's where my family is.
Wishing you a lovely time with your family.. and strong coping skills/tools for getting through the possible tough times. I'm glad you'll be able to check in here while you're away..You've done such an amazing job of being honest with yourself and open with all of us. (I appreciate it more than you know.) That will continue to help get you to the other side of this week as a stronger and happier person! :hug:

[Byrdlady]

STL, I hate AL, too. I tell you, what that ONE substance did to me is mind-boggling. AL has done me NO favors. Being a drunk in my 40's and 50's was no longer cute or sexy, it was pathetic.

A rainy day here....so glad to be sharing my morning with my closest friends....MWO. There is strength in numbers...make yourself a promise to come here first, no matter what.
It wouldnt take much digging to find posts right here in the nest for those folks who caved after this holiday....ALL of them regretted it. Weigh the options...short term scratch of the itch or long term indifference to it. The temporary struggle will pay BIG dividends next year this time when you are facing it again. Stay strong everyone and stay connected to the MotherShip!! The only way OUT is THROUGH.

Have an easy day! Byrdie

[Pavati]

Hi,

LC - You've worked out that sober muscle big time, and it will be even stronger when you next need it. WAY TO GO in making it through such strong cravings.

Several years ago a friend died right around the holidays. I was sad and depressed and therefore didn't go out to "celebrate" all of the holiday parties during this time of year. As sad as I was, I realized something important that year - I actually didn't HAVE to do anything. I could say no! And believe it or not, the party went on without me (though probably not as late - I'm with you, Kuya). As Byrdie says, there are plenty of examples of nesters falling out this time of the year. I am here to say, you CAN say no. If you're feeling shaky, like "why not," or any other way that might compromise your quit, you can catch a "flu," hop on the couch with Lil's cat, and call it a night. The party world WILL go on without you, I promise.

I have a busy day ahead - chores, cooking and family time. So grateful to be heading into it with confidence and without regret.

Pav

[KENSHO]

And the challenge begins... Bloody Mary's and mimosas for breakfast. Sounds disgusting, actually. Skip.

[available]

morning nesters

Well seeing all the hungover people from the wedding yesterday made me grateful i did not and do not drink. Even at 2 years i did feel overwhelmed with all the al but i did not drink and had no urge. Normal drinkers dont understand the inner turmoil we have in our brains when around al and how strong we have to be in these situations. As much as i enjoyed the wedding i realised i still have to be on guard but NS i had no need to be texting in a toilet stall lol.

Yesterday i met up with an old friend i have not seen in 9 years and went to lunch with with her and mum. We had a lovely day. If i had been hungover the friend would not have been seen, lunch would not have been consumed and the paracetamol would have been eaten like lollies and i would have felt like death and then i would have hit the repeat button during the day.

My sons best friends fiances mother died not long ago in her early 50's. She was an alcoholic, fell and hit her head and due to her bad liver disease and what al had done, her blood would not clot and she died from her fall. These are the stories that makes me feel grateful that i was strong enough to stop drinking and stay that way. When you tell people you have stopped drinking there is always a story to be told of someone who is struggling, be it a friend, a friend of a friend, there is always someone else. We should be proud we are all trying to beat al and live our lives the best we can.

LC it would be great if we could turn our bloody brains off those thoughts but as pav said next time you will be stronger until one day you can be surrounded by the shite and not want to go near it. It is well worth the internal struggle but not so at the time, i get that bit! You dont want to lose the days you have now and its getting so much better.

Thinking of your mum J, as you know al wont make your mum better, i realised that with my friend when days were bad and i promised my friend i would never ever drink due to his illness which made me more accountable.

Today we are going home and i cant wait. my puppy has been at the front door waiting for me for 3 days, its nice to know she loves me and misses me.

[lifechange]

Definitely SKIP! Kensho. Now, in my sane mind, I think, what a crazy way to start the day. It might be fun for a couple of minutes.. but then just tiredness and more drinking and I would feel so sad that I'd let myself down AGAIN.. and for what? What part of Arizona are you visiting? What sort of activities do you have planned for your time there? Hikes? My family is in Phoenix and this is such a beautiful time of the year to be in the south..

Ava, you said it perfectly with the "inner turmoil"... that's how I felt yesterday. And it isn't possible for a normal drinker to understand this.. perhaps one who has lived with one of us for a long period of time and has been able to witness first hand the vicious cycle..
I'm getting excited about your 2 year anniversary coming up next week!!! and yours, too, Pav!! any big plans for celebrating?

I'm getting ready to hit the hay so I can get up early to meditate.. something I didn't find the time to do this week.. that was a mistake!
Looking forward to seeing you all tomorrow..

[icespryte]

Hi all xxx ... tomorrow is my day ... I need all your support .. first day .. wow .. this is very basic but I need to be .. I will put in my details tomorrow night and thankyou everyone xxxxxxx

[abcowboy]

Welcome ice! Can't wait to see you back tomorrow starting Day 1 of your journey. Use all the resources and support this site has to offer as if your life depended on it, because at the end of the day, it really does!