Newbies Nest

[Byrdlady]

Good Morning, Nesters!
TJAF, always good to see you!
When I first came to MWO, I seriously didn't know how I was going to get thru ONE day without AL. In the prior 25 years, I could tell you the times that I had one or two drinks (those days were when I was hospitalized!! and yes, I had my suitcase right there pre-loaded with vodka). When I got here, I had 0 AF days during that time. I was scared! That first night I did it was HARD, HARD, HARD! The minutes dragged on, I thought the night would never end. Back then, there were only a couple posts in the NN a day! (I didn't have sense enough to read back over the prior years....my experience wasn't new, my scene had played out many, many times before....right here on this thread). Getting thru that first night was a real breakthrough for me. I was CAPABLE of going AF....now I just had to keep it going. It was a mental hurdle. This whole thing...is a mental hurdle.

There is an ad on FaceBook for a bracelet that says "She believed she could so she did". That's the case here. Once I FINALLY made my mind up, that was it. I pushed any other thought out that bubbled up. My thinking was that if a thought wasn't contributing, it was contaminating....so out it went! NO MORE 'one more's!' No MORE, 'if onlys' No more rules about AL except one: No MORE. So far, so good!

Ho-Ho-Hope everyone has a peaceful day! Byrdie

[Overit-still]

AVA, just having gone through the the death of my mother, I completely understand what you are going through. Be there for him now, we will help you heal. 💖

[KENSHO]

Very quick check in here - I'm not pulling away, I'm busy as a bee! I stayed up last night, and am glad I got these books done and ordered! We woke up to a snow day - and so I slept in, which kept me from being too tired. So glad I feel good - just trying to catch up on my accounting. I should have prioritized that first - and I knew it. Anyway, no plans to drink. Stay strong everyone!

Great work Overit on 14 days!

[j-vo]

MAE All,
Checking in as well. Rough few days. I thought yesterday was tough emotionally, and it was. Today was more of a blow-out with a kid as his attitude and disrespect hit a new high, as did the table he lifted and let drop to the floor. Yeah, he's strong, and no one was hurt, but just another day at the office.

Anyhow, after that incident, I decided to take a drive at lunchtime and have a smoke. I haven't quit that yet, so I didn't break any rules! A drink did cross my mindth as I was still fuming over his behavior. Then of course, I settled down, and thought about his behavior and how I was reacting to it. Damn. I wish I could just catch myself before I let it happen.

Ava, thinking of you.:hug: It's hard watching someone you love deteriorate. Very.

Have a good day. BBall tonight! Looking forward to it.

[Choices]

Hi everyone. I read through and have lots of things to say but I've run out of time.

[Overit-still]

Does anyone know of a good "sobriety clock" for their Iphone? I have one from NOMO but it just tells me days. I want years, months, days, hours, minutes etc.

[Guitarista]

Dunno Overit. There'll b one out there somewhere. Jackie on the army thread might know. Ava, thinking of you and Robert. Lean on us here if u want to. I am around also if you ever want a yap. Beautiful day here. Off into it. L8tr yo !

[abcowboy]

Overit, check out Recovery Elevator in the app store, might be what you're looking for...

[Lavande]

Good evening Nesters,

Overit, I just looked in the App Store - there's one called 'Date & Time Calculator' (9 in 1) by Thomas Tsoppanakas. Looks like it has good reviews

I got tons of stuff done today. I just may be catching up but don't tell anyone, ha ha!!
Wishing everyone a safe & comfy night in the nest!

Lav

[actiongirl46]

Good evening! Day 2 accomplished. Still not feeling much better emotionally, in fact, I'm still feeling like this isn't really happening and angry. Just being honest. I have to keep focusing on the "one day at a time" part. That seems difficult for me. Once I get to about 10pm though I felt a sense of accomplishment. This is such a mental game.

It is so helpful to hear everyone's stories of hope. And also that I'm not the only one that deals with this crap.

A few weeks ago my doctor gave me just a few Xanax (30) for what she diagnosed as a mild panic attack. Do you think one a day for a bit will help get through this first week?? Or is that just replacing one thing with another?? I did not tell her about the nightly bottle of wine . . .

[Matt M.]

Late Check in for me. Just working like a dog.
The Holiday party/ drinking accidents are officially in full force. Sad and unfortunate.
I'm very grateful that today I have absolutely zero desire to drink, such a beautiful thing!
Stay Hard weirdos!

[Matt M.]

Does anyone know of a good "sobriety clock" for their Iphone? I have one from NOMO but it just tells me days. I want years, months, days, hours, minutes etc.

I use a great app called Clean Time Counter. I have an android type phone, but I bet it's in the iPhone app store as well.

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[Pavati]

Hi, All:

ActionGirl - Anger is the first stage of grief. Keep venting here. One piece of advice I got was to take it one MINUTE at a time if need be. I was pretty angry for a while, mostly at myself and my situation. It was freeing to get over that hurdle and ease into acceptance. You'll get there.

Ava - I know this doesn't help, but death is a part of being human. It will comfort you in the long run that you were able to be there for Robert in such a strong way. Take good care of yourself and reach out if you need anything. I know you won't drink because you don't drink, and besides you know Stella has a brick with your name on it if need by. Much love and comfort! xo

Matt - I think you must have one of the hardest jobs there is. So sad that people die needlessly. You're another one who needs to take care of himself. Thanks for the work you do, and stay hard, freak.

Another LONG day at work. I'll be glad for a couple of days off.

Pav

[Choices]

Well done action girl on day two! That is a hard one when your trying to come to terms with it all and I hear you completely on the anger! It's not just recovering from a hangover once you post on a website to help you with your drinking.. It feels bigger doesn't it? It's probably best to ask your doctor about the Xanax...but I would say take one if you need one and see how you go. The first week can feel panicky and I would try and make yourself as comfortable as possible. Your not switching one drug for the other... Your dealing with a lot and Xanax probably will help. But like I said... I'm not a dr... Better to talk with one. I'm hesitant to talk with mine about these things.. It's like I don't want it on my record and I worry.. And.. The biggest reason is I'm embarrassed! Whatever you do don't take more then the recommended dose and don't drink on Xanax.

[Choices]

Ugggg.., so I rode out a really bad craving tonight. I am successfully through it. I am 7 days today.. I miscalculated my quit date. But it was my first major one. It was as strong as the one I had when I caved last week. What worked was stopping all chores and taking care of immediate needs, I ate, I called hubs to pick up dinner, just fish and chips so we could have a picnic and not have a mess in the house. I posted even though my daughter was crying, I just dropped everything and made a huge glass of ice coffee. And counted down the minutes until hubs was home. He had beer on his breath which didn't really help.. But I told him my state.. So we wouldn't get into a fight. He apologized for having it on his breath.. Not because he is needing to quit himself but because he seamed to understand it didn't really help. He had a beer at lunch with a client.. This was 4 hours before seeing me so my nose was super sensitive! I'm wondering if I even had adrenalin in my system. He felt bad but it all was ok because of this dinner I didn't have to cook. Once we were at the beach and watching my girl run after seagulls, eating dinner.. Then getting some ice cream.. The craving is gone! I feel grateful.