Newbies Nest

[Dutch1988]

Lav I drink green tea but he liter so I'll keep doing that. It was the drink I used in place of alcohol, so that can't be it.

We had a party yesterday and I stayed clear of the alcohol. I have even more incentive to not drink, or I could get a case of the fuck its and want to drink more. Alcohol didn't change the party much around here, couple of parents from my school having a good time, my friends and my wife's friends all hanging out playing games and chatting. I was surprised how little drinking would have helped me. I had a little bit of social anxiety in the beginning as I don't really like big groups of people, but luckily I had kids from my school I could always fall back on checking on. Overall a great time and I got through serving alcohol at my party, I enjoyed a few sodas and some tea. Next stop NYE.

[paulywogg]

Dutch,Dr.Google says too much green tea can cause hbp,are you still taking ginseng? That can cause it too,just weird that you're young,in shape,have a log stretch sober and still have it,I'm older,outta shape and my bp is fine....so far,I worry cuz my mom has it,gramma had it so bad she'd get nosebleeds, yikes

[Eloise]

Checking in (finally), we are moving and the internet will not be set up until Tuesday.
So far so good & my husband seems to be feeling quite good about moving to the village where he grew up. I wasnt sure if it might take him a while to feel okay about it, but it is the sensible thing to do.

My thumb is healing and looking better. I am able to change the bandage myself now and have the bandage off a couple hours a day when I can just do nothing.

Still quite painful. Doggies are fine and Elie is wearing a harness now Brydie.
She chased a rabbit tonight on her walk and I was afraid she was going to run into the road so I tackled her. She was quite surprised, I was too. I am not about to loss her now.

My husband drank too much wine last night but I didn't realize it until this morning.
He had a hangover. I should have realized it when he started to say "shame you don't drink anymore" but quickly corrected himself.
I was like "What? Gosh what a keen observation." Drunk, that is okay. No wonder he was being so silly when we talked to my dad.

I will have a look around, but it seem most folks are doing okay? I hope so. Not easy this time of year. I was very glad to have slept well and feel relaxed today. I can almost not believe how I had a handover of some degree most days.

This week is a tough one, sending everyone sober energy to get through it all.

[rednose]

What secrets, tricks, advise for those who are struggling with wanting to take that dreaded first drink after having some AF days under your
belt? I know I am not the only one who struggles so I would appreciate hearing how you deal with this. Or if you can point me in the direction
of some post that deal with this It would be greatly appreciated.

Thanks rednose

[NoSugar]

Great posting first, Rednose! Playing the night through to tomorrow often helps. Think about what ALWAYS happens after you allow that first one... And think about how you'll feel when you wake up tomorrow after drinking a bottle tonight.

Now think how tomorrow will be because you're not going to drink tonight.

Let that bad idea go! It is making you uncomfortable so don't give it attention. Any diversion is fine - food, exercise, reading here - you name it. Just don't have that first of many glasses.

[Guitarista]

What secrets, tricks, advise for those who are struggling with wanting to take that dreaded first drink after having some AF days under your
belt? I know I am not the only one who struggles so I would appreciate hearing how you deal with this. Or if you can point me in the direction
of some post that deal with this It would be greatly appreciated.

Thanks rednose

Try this Red. Plus everything from page 1 in the toolbox. You're the captain of your ship.

https://www.mywayout.org/community/monthly-abstinence/24253-tool-box-post481120.html#post481120

[rednose]

Try this Red. Plus everything from page 1 in the toolbox. You're the captain of your ship.

https://www.mywayout.org/community/mo...tml#post481120

Guitar

Thanks for the link to the tool box. That is what I needed to find.

[available]

Red when i first stopped drinking i avoided anything associated with al. The tv, reading magazines and going out. Why put myself in the situation of temptation. I mainly came on here or watched movies on al or doco's on you tube. I showered, i cleaned, i walked around in circles, i put music on, i ate like an idiot, i talked to myself saying no i dont want a drink. I knew if i gave in to that al voice and drank, i was hurting my family and myself. I rang someone for a chat just to take my mind off that voice even if it was for 10 mins. I dont miss that al voice anymore but he is a bastard. I went for a walk and took no money or cards and i showered. Damn i was clean and so was the shower!

Pm an mwoer, email a friend. Dont ever believe that you can deal with that drink, you cant, you are on a drinking site for a reason as we all are but we truly understand how you feel.

It gets better and better each and everyday sober.

[Byrdlady]

Rednose, I went back and grabbed your first post from 12/17/12. Almost three years to the day. Just think about that first drink, and where it takes us....right back to square one. It helped me to read my first post when I had those thoughts. Do you want to be in the very same place in a year from now or do you want to be one year sober without the struggle? Push those thoughts out!

Here is your post:
Newbie worried about withdrawls

Ok Here I go.
I have been drinking a bunch for the last 6 months. It started with wine but now I have progressed to drinking about a fifth of gin a day. I can't afford to go to a treatment center or a detox center at this time.
I am worried about seizure's and the other things that will come with stopping drinking.
Does the beer taper work? With what I have written here what do you suggest.
I have tried to quit in the past and have had some success but have always come back to drinking after a time. My main concern at the moment is to stop drinking a fifth of gin a day and taper off slowly. The holidays are hard for me but I need to do something.
I won't bore you with what has brought me to this place but it has been a rough couple of years. deaths in my family, put mom in nursing home, got robbed at gun point in my own house, so on and so on.
SO IS THERE ANY HOPE FOR ME HERE FOLKS?

Thanks Robert rednose:new:

A bit about me. I am 58 and have drank most of my adult life with stopping on and off, mostly off. Last night I blacked out and had an argument with my girlfriend on the phone and I don't remember one word about the conversation other than what she told me. Yes she said I was quite the asshole, No big surprize. I have tried AA and it did not work for me. I went to a treatment center for 30 days to get sober and was drinking 6 months later and I was 20 grand poorer. I don't have insurance that will cover a treatment center and I really think I need to figure this out my way.
I am hoping for some support here and I want to be of support to others. So if you see something here that you can relate to or some words that might help It will be greatly appreciated.

[Guitarista]

It can seem the struggle will always be with us when newly sober, but it is important to remember that that mental struggle will fade more and more, becoming smaller and smaller. This is what every longer term sober person tells us here, so I take that leap of faith and look for what I am gaining not what I mistakenly think I am missing.

We sure have to put in some work in the early days. My work right now is going for a run, taking immediate action, as I'm getting some 'romantic' illusory thoughts about the poison which do not go with where I want to head or who I am.

[NoSugar]

It can seem the struggle will always be with us when newly sober, but it is important to remember that that mental struggle will fade more and more, becoming smaller and smaller. This is what every longer term sober person tells us here, so I take that leap of faith and look for what I am gaining not what I mistakenly think I am missing.

We sure have to put in some work in the early days. My work right now is going for a run, taking immediate action, as I'm getting some 'romantic' illusory thoughts about the poison which do not go with where I want to head or who I am.

While getting your biochemistry straightened out at the beginning and there is a physical dependence, the struggle is real. It can be minimized with good nutrition, supplementation in some cases, good hydration, etc. Like Mr G said, at some point the struggle starts to fade. From all I've observed here, the more a person is able to see themselves as a non drinker - to surrender to this idea - the quicker and less painful the process. Surrender is not defeat - here, it is victory.

The moment you decide you are a non drinker, that is exactly what you can be. Like Pav says, we've had the power all along.

[Guitarista]

From all I've observed here, the more a person is able to see themselves as a non drinker - to surrender to this idea - the quicker and less painful the process. Surrender is not defeat - here, it is victory.

The moment you decide you are a non drinker, that is exactly what you can be. Like Pav says, we've had the power all along.

Wow, well put SB. :thumbsup:

[Lavande]

Good evening Nesters,

Tool a stroll thru Ikea today & only bought a few candles. A 90 mile roundtrip for candles seems kind of stupid but that's how we chose to waste the afternoon
Good thing the gas prices keep dropping, ha ha!!!

Rednose, DISTRACTION is what got me thru the first few weeks & months! Distance & distraction work well together. Keep yourself far, far away from AL, don't allow temptation to sneak in & derail you!

Eloise, glad to hear you are healing, goodness! Good luck on your move, check in when you can

I need to get back to my healthier routine starting tomorrow (exercise & NO cookies)!!
Wishing everyone a safe & comfy night in the nest.

Lav

[ItsJustMe]

Hey Dudes – just bouncing in to report that this evening ends day 15 AF for me. We drove back from my parents house today – a nice 5 hour trek. Traffic was not near as bad as I assumed – I figured everyone would be traveling today. I had an awesome AF time with my family but it is good to get back home. I am off work tomorrow but have a truck load of stuff to do – pick up the dogs from the kennel, mail some packages at the UPS store, take down the Christmas tree and decors.

There was little Al at my parents house. It was extremely easy to avoid. No one other than my beautiful spouse knows about my AF commitment so I was asked once if I wanted a glass or wine – of which I declined. No pressure, no one even noticed. And I didn’t feel I was depriving myself at all. I didn’t really think about it at all. Pretty cool!

It sounds like everyone pretty much survived the holidays. This is a great bunch and everyone here should be giving each other a big ol’ high five!

Have a great evening everyone!
IJM

[rednose]

Wow !

Thanks to you all for the post. I realize my fight is with alcohol but also with my mind. Stinking thinking is what they call it in AA.
I so appreciate the posts and directions to the tool box. Thanks Byrdlady for going back and finding my original post from 3 + years ago.
That made me stop and think do I want to be doing this again three years from now?
Somewhere in the big book of AA It says " Remember that we deal with alcohol—cunning, baffling, powerful! " I would also like to ad Patient
It will wait and wait and wait for you to come crawling back and give you the same if not worse results than the previous attempts at trying to control your drinking.

I am over the immediate scare of running out and buying a bottle. But all this information and feedback will serve me in the future.

Thank you all again.

rednose. :thanks: