Newbies Nest

[Dutch1988]

Welcome NoMo! glad your here. I have had the same experience, although I have never quit for more than a month prior to this. Any time I think about drinking again I bring it up here and it helps knock some sense into me. Stick around!

Holy shit Honeysoup, from sitting on this side of the keyboard it seems like you have your act together pretty good. Good you for taking that next step and deciding you want to control your drinking too.

Been bummed out lately. My emotions are so much like a roller coaster I am just starting to grab on to anything I can. After three days of crawling through the day, I start feeling super energetic last night, went to workout at 1130pm because I couldn't sleep, went to sleep at about two. It was nice to have something I wanted to do though. Even if it kept me up waiting later than it should have haha.

[Matt M.]

Good morning from the great state of Texas!

I haven't been vigilant with my check ins, which I know can sneak up and get the best of us. Things have been going well, I made a MAJOR career move in January(Still in Public Safety), which was and is very stressful. Glad to have made it through so far with as much as a thought of drink on one occasion, and that was me wishing I could have went and had a celebratory drink with my coworkers. That thought was immediately squashed by my Muscle memory of playing that drink out over the next week, results always come back the same. Why would I want to erase a year and a half to something that took damn near 20 years? Not gonna do it, wouldn't be prudent-

Although my family and I couldn't be happier with my new venture, I have been busier than a one legged man in an ass kicking contest.
Different kind of busy, because I'm home more than I have been in 23 years, and able to spend far more time with my kids than ever.

Honey- Me too about AA, and I grew up with it all around me.
Never a need to apologize for telling your story, I believe it's important to put it down in writing, and share it with people that can relate.
The one thing that stands out to me in your post, and like many of us is the common denominator in OUR life stories and struggles- Drugs and or Alcohol, mind altering substances
Every horrible decision, relentless regrets, I have ever made in my life, we're likely the result of me being hammered. As easy as it sounds, the number 1 step in recovery, after admitting or realizing there is a problem, is take the Alcohol or drug out of the equation, no matter what you won't drink, no matter what what you can't drink. Reminding yourself that if this insanity continues, you can just copy your post, save it, then come back the next time, paste it and add more pain and misery, and that's if you make it to the "next time". Once the AL is out of the equation and you can level out some, then you can work on "you" and any underlying issues. I have done things similar to the 12 steps, right here in these rooms- I have people I consider sponsors that hold me accountable, I have shared some deep shit with them, I am forgiving myself for my past Fuck ups, I lean on a higher power which I call God, and I share my experiences and offer guidance when I can. So far after many failed attempts this pattern has yielded me over a year and a half of sobriety.
Like has been stated, make a plan and share it with us or someone, create some accountability. Latch on to people you connect with...
I'm definitely rambling- I'm glad your back and let us in, don't close tthe door on us, and I promise great things can happen!

Stay Hard Freaks!

[Lavande]

Good afternoon Nesters,

Glad to see the site back up & running
Grateful to have escaped any damage from the violent storms that rolled thru my area last night. A tornado touched down in the next county, just a few miles away. It's an area heavy populated by Amish, they lost a lot of property & a school.

Congrats on your new job Matt. I hope it all works out well for you!
Stay happy & stay on plan always.

Dutch, going to work out at 11:30 pm, hmmm.
Are you possibly overstimulated by medication? Maybe you can talk to your doc, you don't want to crash & burn after all this time. Take care!

Byrdie, some of these winter time viruses are extra nasty. Glad you are on the mend.

I am watching my granddaughter today, fun Thursdays. She turns 5 tomorrow, time flies.
Wishing everyone a great AF day.

Lav

[KENSHO]

Checking in from my phone. Been extra busy at work, and last night thought about staying up late to get done work done. I haven't done this in 3 months. The thought that came rushing in was "you could drink to get through working late". And it sounded good to me. So I went home, helped with dinner, kids baths/bedtimes, and I was asleep by 9:15. I have been thinking about drinking today. Sometimes I want that quick fix and I hear myself saying "I don't care if it's wrong..." And I think "I can live in the edge and get through a little drama, and then my work gets done". C-R-A-Z-Y that this can go through my head. I am more productive now not drinking (except at night) and have plenty of edge and drama - except it is genuine and not chemically induced. I am better off NOT drinking and I know it, but those thoughts are hanging around a bit.

Anyway, things are good otherwise. HONEYSOUP, I have a lot of respect for the decisions you have made for yourself and that you have weathered some storms and take responsibility for your actions. I think you are on the right track - though not sure that once we find this site, we are not so far into alcohol that moderation is not possible? I'm with you, I wish there were a way to enjoy a glass of wine here and there, but I've wired my brain to believe alcohol is an answer, a fix. I don't think I can go back. Anyway, thank you for sharing

Who said "non-drinker, non-problem"? Love that.

NS & Marylou, I will try to remember to share my favorite recipes. It's been fun and amazing to make food without sugar and chemicals. You truly lose your taste for it.

That's all for now. Thanks everyone for posting... It is good to read.

[j-vo]

Kensho, when the thoughts are hanging around like that, try to play it forward to when your night is over, you've done your work, but you've drank wine. What will your morning be like compared to what it would be had you not done that? If you look at it like an enjoyable thing, as I'm sure it probably was, try to think one of the many reasons you decided that it's not a good idea to pull those late nighters. And if your best work does happen then, get a special non-al drink and go at it.

[j-vo]

Just reading Liz Hemingway's Stop Drinking, Start Living.. She says,

You have to constantly work at maintaining the correct frame of mind or life will intervene and you will find yourself back where you started very quickly.

If we begin to glamorize having drinks, enjoying the firsts, (Trying to imitate and chase that first) we will be stuck for awhile, thinking we can get it back, and it never comes. What will come back is the hell, pain, agony, and more loss of life. Maintain the correct state of mind so we don't have to go back to the beginning.

[Byrdlady]

Jvo, great quote there. We all know Square 1 sucks!

[Lavande]

Good evening Nesters,

Just flying in to wish everyone a safe & cozy night in the nest.

Maintaining is SO much easier than starting over again, trust me. Next month I will be celebrating 7 years of maintaining this, my last & forever quit. It was the best decision I have ever made, hands down. You all can do it too

Lav

[KENSHO]

Hi All. Thanks JVO for the smack upside the head. Need that sometimes.

Food alert! NS, the link you posted for giving recipes didn't take me anywhere, so here are a few of my favorites. Sugar (and junk) free, and fairly easy; we will keep these in our regular line-up (and the kids love them - except for the fish!):

http://myheartbeets.com/crispy-carnitas/ (the orange, lime and cinnamon stick make this amazing!)

http://whole30.com/2015/04/chicken-cacciatore/

http://www.tastesoflizzyt.com/2014/10/01/paleo-italian-meatballs/

(my family can't tell the difference between other recipes. I use jarred spag. sauce that only has tomatoes and spices)

http://www.mastercook.com/app/recipe/WebRecipeDetails?recipeId=2070259

http://www.christopherjamesclark.com/blog/pistachio-cranberry-whitefish/

(I used almonds, not pistachios. The cran's were sour, so I added apple-juice sweetened cran's at the end as garnish)

[moni]

I had a moment last night. I thought if I returned to drinking wine in the evening, I wouldn't eat as much junk. The zip had broken on my dress and I was feeling low. I know it's a ridiculous thought and if I have managed to stay off booze and cigs over 40 days, then I can find a way to curtail my sugar intake and get fit again.

[Lavande]

Good morning Nesters, happy Friday!

Kensho, your recipes look very good!

Moni, I quit smoking less than 2 months after I quit drinking. I developed a serious fascination with sugar & immediately put on 13 pounds
That was rough but I stayed with my quits, there was no option for me. I finally picked up a bottle of L-Glutamine & within a few days I broke up with sugar
Give it a try, it really did the trick for me. I lost the weight in time, try not to worry. Protecting your quits has to be priority right now.

Have a great AF day everyone!
Lav

[Byrdlady]

Good morning! Heading to Charleston to see step daughter. Man Flu is improving, I've graduated from paper towels to Kleenex so things are looking up. Hope everyone has a safe and sober weekend! Byrdie.

[j-vo]

Glad you're feeling better Byrdie.

Moni, what Lav said...priorities are your quits.

Slept in today for the first time ever and was late to work. Crazy!! I never even did that when I was drinking. Well, I just 'called off' actually. I remember getting up on Fridays with the worst hangover because I would start my weekend on Thursday nights. Don't miss that at all.

Have a good day all.

[KENSHO]

Good morning! The sun is out and it's a lovely Friday here! I've found that when not drinking: The lows are no lower than if I were consuming alcohol, but the highs are MUCH, MUCH higher! That's a definite net positive. I'm enjoying feeling grateful and present today.

[actiongirl46]

Hi all -
Kensho - Thanks for the reminder about the lows and the yummy recipies! I'm trying the carnitas tonight.

Bydie - So glad you are feeling better. A cold is no fun.

Moni - You are doing awesome! Great work.

HoneySoup - Hope you are kind to yourself today. Glad you are here.

No Mo Merlot - What's up? How's it going? If its not going exactly as you want it, just get back up and try again. Let us know . . .

Lav - Time for sunglasses for the chickens? Happy 5th Birthday party! Let me guess, princess theme?? How fun.

I am well. I am here. I am committed to doing the best I can today. Take care all! AG