Newbies Nest

[Dutch1988]

Seemed like malodrama did some good. So many people bringing up their success being apart of the community might push a lurker over the edge and join. Christ saying, silver lining and all

360 today BTW

[Byrdlady]

Good Morning, Nesters!
Mr V, always a pleasure! Great to see you!

Matt M, that really WAS a post for the ages....would you please consider tucking that in the Tool Box for us? It is a great reminder that we long to be like other people regarding AL, but all the wishing in the world won't make it so. Thank you for putting that into words for us...there are so many aspects of this growth experience, it's just hard to put a lot of them into words, but your message did a great job on that point!

I hope everyone has an easy day today. Any day we wake up without a chalk line around us is a WIN!! XO, Byrdie

[Lavande]

Good evening Nesters,

Haha! No chalk line around this old bird Byrdie

Dutch, 360 days for you?? Woo hoo, we only have 5 days to plan your party, get a cake made & all that :welldone:

Not looking forward to waking up to snow BUT this should be the last of the season, right??
Wishing everyone a safe & comfy night in the nest!

Lav

[TJAF]

Matt I got nowhere in my years of trying to drink normally except falling deeper and deeper into the abyss of alcoholism. After many attempts to stop drinking it didn't stick until I first admitted to myself that I am an alcoholic. Let me repeat that. I wasn't able to stop drinking until I first admitted I am an alcoholic! Folks there is zero shame. The sun didn't stop rising in the morning. The world didn't start hating me I simply got sober!

[Mr Vervill]

Went back and read a few posts. Brilliant, Matt, and Rahul! Thank you!

[TJAF]

Melodrama. Is that you Behan! Please tell me this is you.

[TJAF]

Melodrama I just read through your posts and it is you Behan you sly kook. Did you climb back under your rock already. I do so love slapping you around. Just message me so we don't have to bore these fine folks with your droolery.

[Guitarista]

Yo!

Kick some arse in your own way Nesters. You know u can. ;-)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c-3vPxKdj6o

[TJAF]

I liked you better when you were Behan. Nice touch with the Warren Oates avatar BTW. Now climb back under your rock little man. You're too boring to bother with anymore.

[Lavande]

Good morning Nesters, happy Friday to all

No time for messing with trolls this morning, I have things to do!

Wishing everyone a great AF day with no regrets!!

Lav

[Byrdlady]

Good Morning, Nesters!
Mr G, it's great to see your face this morning! TJAF, yours are always welcome posts!!

As I was getting ready this morning, a commercial appeared on tv about Campbell's soup. In it, the lady was at the grocery store with her two kids and a big storm was approaching and at the end she blindly reached out for a bottle of wine to cope with it all. This hit me a bit, I felt a twinge of "Dang, I miss being able to check out of life sometimes".....then I caught myself. I didn't do it sometimes, I did it EVERY DAY. That's NOT normal. As I carried on with the thought, and worked thru it, I also thought about other commercials that show the benefits of broccoli or Vitamin D, or POPCORN. These are things that really effect my Crohn's disease....I am sensitive to those commercials, too. All those things look really good when someone is trying to sell them to you (and have spent millions of dollars in the process). So when we are bombarded by the ads that hit us where we are sensitive, just look at the bigger picture and move on! Everybody has something he/she should avoid, so don't get caught up in a pity party if you feel this way when an AL advertisement comes on. Just keep it moving!!!

As we all know, caving in to that drink gets us nowhere. Stay strong this weekend, it's only Friday, NOT a ticket to BoozeVille! Byrdie

[paulywogg]

I've seen that commercial Byrdie and that's kinda how I thought of alcohol at first,kinda cutesy like I need a drink to deal with a person,situation and we'd laugh about it but then I started actually needing a drink to function and it wasn't so cute anymore

[upandover]

Morning, know this isn't much compared to all you strong nesters BUT, yesterday was my day 1. Felt betteer than I have in a long time. Although, last night was tough I got through it drinking lots of Minute Maid Mango juice (15 calories -- I sound like a commercial), and having conversations with my dogs - who are a good audience. Thanks for your support nesters. Hope to not disappoint you all. :yay: u/o

[LilBit]

Yay for you, upandover! Just do the same thing tomorrow, and tomorrow and tomorrow... you can do this. Before you know it, you'll find yourself saying what I'm about to say...

One year AF today! 'Best thing I ever did for my loved ones and myself.

Don't ever look back.

Love,

LilBit

[NoSugar]

Last night in this book I read a great analogy for that crazy situation when part of your brain (lower brain) is screaming for a drink while the other part (your 'higher' brain - the real you) knows you shouldn't and doesn't want to. Imagine the real you is the driver of a car and your lower brain is a strapped-in passenger in the back seat. As you approach a red light, your sensible, thinking, rationale brain will prepare to stop. But what if the back-seat "driver" is screaming in your ear to GO GO GO!! It would be unnerving but odds are good you'll still stop. Like a back seat driver, your lower brain can scream for a drink all it wants and make you feel terribly tense and stressed, but it can't take any action. The real, rationale you is completely in charge, even when it doesn't feel that way, and can choose to ignore the hollering from the back seat.

It occurred to me that the analogy goes even further. Cravings seem real and relentless and while I could often ignore them for awhile, I eventually couldn't take the noise in my head and the awful feelings in my body and I'd drink. It's kind of like I was driving that car with the lunatic passenger in the back on a long, commercial highway with red light after red light after red light and at each one I heard the scream to GO GO GO DRINK DRINK DRINK! At some point it would just seem like too much to take. I knew how to make it shut-up, so I did.

But, even when desperately wanting to drink, there would be brief periods (between the red lights) when I was ok and thought I was going to make it. Then, another red light and another scream.

The thing to remember, though is that eventually we would drive out of that commercial area and onto the open road. There'd be nothing for that crazy passenger to scream about. In the same way, for most of us there is that "witching hour" and if we get past that, we're ok. If I managed not to drink until 7 pm, I generally didn't drink. Over time AF, the craving "window" got shorter and shorter. I no longer knew the time of day by the feelings of wanting to drink that would start building in me at about 4 pm each and every day. It was so strange to lose track of time and work much longer than I needed to because I didn't have that internal scream telling me it was wine-o'clock.

You really can ignore that back seat driver who on his own cannot take a drink - there will be moments of peace and eventually your mind will quiet. You don't have to do anything a strapped-in, powerless, self-destructive backseat driver desperately wants you do do. You're in charge.

Have a great weekend, NS