We leave to visit the in-laws next week. To be in their house for 5 days. I have enjoyed this time previously. But it has been the place that I've fallen to drinking in the past. I am also being more picky about eating - and I know that annoys the MIL. Heck, it annoys me. I'm not sure how to be the picky person - that has never been my identity. But the truth is that I feel MUCH better not eating certain things, and I can either feel like crap or eat what I want and feel better. Same goes with alcohol. It's just not a setting without temptation and not supportive to be any way other than the way THEY are. Husband reverts some too - as we all do in our family's space. SO I feel like I will have to be on defense - protecting me, my quit, and eat what I want to eat. I guess if they don't support that, they aren't worth my concern about what they think. SO - looking forward to the break - NOT looking forward to being on the defense. But that's part of life and this choice I guess. And the more we practice doing what WE need and speaking our truth and getting through situations we feel are hard - the stronger we become. I will probably need to be here a lot next week!
Eloise, some of the events in the world are scary, disappointing, heartbreaking, and difficult to comprehend. There is no other way to put it. I have found that there are an equal amount of inspiring, kind, hopeful and good things that happen in the world every day as well. It must be hard to distance yourself from the Belgium attack if you are close to it (do you live near it? Did I mis-read that?). Sometimes it helps - and it is actually scientifically proven - that when we deliberately choose to put more energy and focus into the positive things happening in the world, THOSE things grow. At the time of the 911 attacks, I spend a good part of a year feeling very down and scared and powerless. I still wish I could do more - being one person - to propagate the kind of world that I feel is kind to all souls - but I have decided to try and focus on the positive things and it has helped me be happier in my daily life. I don't mean be blissfully ignorant - because we need to be informed - and I don't mean not to grieve... I just mean build the good by focusing on the good. It at least makes me feel like I am creating - or building on - something positive - and not so powerless. Prayer, meditation, recognizing and creating small acts of kindness daily - THESE things are contagious just like the devastation of an attack is. I feel the more energy I give to the negative, the more it builds as well. Anyway - not trying to preach - just sharing what has worked for me when I'm feeling disheartened.
My son has this book called "The smile that went around the world". It is about a little boy who gave some cookies to some hungry homeless people, instead of bringing them to a party. Their gratitude made him smile so brightly, that he impacted other people in the hour following. Those people felt so positive from his smile that they smiled, and felt kind. They lost their irritability and smiled more and those people they helped smiled - until one of the end people ended up back with the boy and on a day he felt down, that smile returned to him. THAT is what I mean. What we do grows. :heartbeat:
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