Newbies Nest

[paulywogg]

Welcome to MWO In the sky

[Justme Again]

Hi In the Sky!

You made a great decision. You will feel better day by day. It is amazing how your body heals and how your mind starts to work without that poison.

Stay close to the nest and let us know how it goes.

Justme

[outsidelookingin]

Stuck with plan so far so good. Found some good advice from a edgy DR newsletter I get - regarding unhealthy behavior and language we use to achieve our goals. Theres data that shows those who use the thought or words "I don't" Such as I don't overeat anymore or I don't drink alcohol anymore. VS those who say or think "I cant" have have an 80% chance of meeting their goals whereas the I can't'ers have a 10% chance.

THe I Don't thought is more personal where the thinker is in control whereas the "I can't" thinker believes that its out of their control. Granted there are exceptions to this on both sides. For example I had it backwards yesterday and when the desire to break away from my plan hit. I thought I can't do that, because of the consequences ie being on that same path again. So it was easier to say no for that reason. Next time it hits I'll try I don't as a personal statement. Either way whichever works for you, you win. In my case I'm going with the shotgun approach - I can't (insert issue) because of what will happen to me, so I don't (insert issue) anymore, because I don't want to be on that road again. Hope this helps someone.

[Eloise]

wow I did not realise you are starting so quickly Brydie?
It is great to get it going. I have yet to even sign my contract. we are going to have to come up with lots of distractions as I won't start until September.
that said I do not really want to talk much about it until the contract is signed.

Welcome IntheSky!!
Gosh, day 1 is probably the hardest. So much doubt, you can definitely not drink for one day. Look at it that way, tomorrow will be waiting for you to deal with it then.

[Eloise]

Oh, and I forgot I wanted to write about the most WONDERFUL cup of tea I had last night before sleep.

A cup of lavender tea, made with the flowers from a tea shop, not packaged. Just the smell of it was so relaxing. I didn't think I would like the taste, but it made me feel so good and so relaxed. Maybe give it a try IntheSky? I am brewing another pot this morning but with a little lavender and then some white Chinese tea. Relaxing but shouldn't put me to sleep like the straight lavender did!

[NoSugar]

Theres data that shows those who use the thought or words "I don't" Such as I don't overeat anymore or I don't drink alcohol anymore. VS those who say or think "I cant" have have an 80% chance of meeting their goals whereas the I can't'ers have a 10% chance.

How we think about our situations is so critical, Outside. "Can't drink" suggests deprivation. "Won't drink" shows determination but can involve will-power, which is hard to maintain over the long run. The turning point for me came when I realized I didn't have to drink. I realize it was always my choice but it sure didn't feel that way - drinking seemed like something I had to do to make it through the day. Turns out that is because the part of our brain that makes us do the things to ensure survival of the species is the exact part that gets hijacked by alcohol. It really does seem like we need it to survive. But, we obviously don't, and after enough time of complete abstinence, our brains can heal enough that it doesn't feel like we need to drink. And that is one of the best feelings I've ever had. I hope you feel it soon. All the best, NS

[Inthesky]

Day 2 I had the worst sleep ever awake every hour on the hour. Today will be better than yesterday. My stomach and the self loathing of poisoning myself has been devastating. My relationship with alcohol has now ended. In a weird way I feel a sense of loss.
Thank you Eloise I will be picking up some lavender tea today. Not sure I wanna leave the house though. I just want to thank everyone for the warm welcome sorry about my post my thoughts are all over.

[Inthesky]

No sugar thank you for the post. I will have control to not drink. I needed that today.��

[NoSugar]

In a weird way I feel a sense of loss.

That is pretty normal, Inthesky, and might go on for awhile. If you're like me, alcohol had become my best and in some ways only friend. I pushed away most of my other real friends so I could have the relationship alcohol seemed to demand of me. I also gave up many interests and hobbies, manipulated things to always be home by 5 p.m., and coerced other people to drive when I did have to be out in the evening. I let many people down and missed out on countless opportunities. It takes awhile to rebuild real relationships, rekindle old interests, and find new AF activities.

Your sleep will improve. There are clear explanations concerning neurotransmitters that are affected by alcohol for why early sobriety sleep is so disordered. It may take time but it will all level out.

Be gentle with yourself. NS

[Eloise]

I have another little 'comfort' item I use even now after 2 years of being sober. I found this greek yogurt that I love, it soothes my tummy even when it doesn't feel like I need it.
Whatever you can come up with that makes you feel good without alcohol and added sugar is a good idea.
Bananas and watermellon are other good ones!

Day 2 I had the worst sleep ever awake every hour on the hour. Today will be better than yesterday. My stomach and the self loathing of poisoning myself has been devastating. My relationship with alcohol has now ended. In a weird way I feel a sense of loss.
Thank you Eloise I will be picking up some lavender tea today. Not sure I wanna leave the house though. I just want to thank everyone for the warm welcome sorry about my post my thoughts are all over.

[Eloise]

Thanks for this post.
My trouble sleeping was an early sign to me that alcohol was a bigger problem than I cared to admit.
Especially those 2-3 months after first quitting, omg it did get worse before it got better.

That is pretty normal, Inthesky, and might go on for awhile. If you're like me, alcohol had become my best and in some ways only friend. I pushed away most of my other real friends so I could have the relationship alcohol seemed to demand of me. I also gave up many interests and hobbies, manipulated things to always be home by 5 p.m., and coerced other people to drive when I did have to be out in the evening. I let many people down and missed out on countless opportunities. It takes awhile to rebuild real relationships, rekindle old interests, and find new AF activities.

Your sleep will improve. There are clear explanations concerning neurotransmitters that are affected by alcohol for why early sobriety sleep is so disordered. It may take time but it will all level out.

Be gentle with yourself. NS

[tonyniceday]

Hi In the Sky,
I'm on day 2 (again!!!). I have been resisting for months even the thought of taking Antabuse but after a really major mess up at the weekend, with my then friends (Shiraz and Shmirnoff!) I was finally persuaded to take this. I think it's probably not the best thing in the long term but taking the tablet does kick-start me into the "I cannot and therefore will not drink today". Because this is not my first attempt to get Alcohol Free, I have also go the Doc to give me something to help with the sleep patterns and desire for alcohol.
Yes it does concern me that I may be replacing one addiction with another in the long term but for now I am going with the medical advice.
Anyway, I got through yesterday and I am 3 quarters through today. Tomorrow can definitely look after itself for the moment

[Inthesky]

Has anyone found anything to help with the lack of sleep and I've been sweating awfully. So gross. I've been keeping a journal so I will remember how messed up this time in my life was. One step at a time. I didn't realize how messed up I have become. Need to take control of my life once and for all.

[Inthesky]

Thanks Tony looks like we had the same weekend. But add some beer and cider to the red wine and vodka it was a complete mess and total bad comedy. Just trying to move past it and embrace this next chapter.

[SKendall]

IntheSky, you are just across the Juan de Fuca to me. Early days are very difficult and sleepless. I used L-Tryptophan, magnesium and Melatonin. Welcome, you are in great company in the NN.