Newbies Nest

[Justme Again]

Wow Pav!!! Wow! Wow! Wow!
Congratulations on your 1000 days!!!:sohappy::goodjob::thumbsup:

[Justme Again]

Hi Nest

I had a lovely weekend. Did nothing. NOTHING!
Ate pasta, chocolates and watched "War dogs" twice. Really helped to recharge my ever flat batery .

Kensho - really feel for you girl. Liked Abcowboy's take on it. Hope you find a way with your hubby. Its hard when you are uncomfortable in your own home.

Gman - good to see you. You will figure it out for yourself!

NS - Thanks for the great post. It was really comforting.

Lav - patience!! It amazes me how things work themselves out. The business I wanted, but can't have is willing to look at other buy options to help me. And this morning my friend phoned to tell about the same type business in the city where my kids live... I am unsure, so I will wait and see...

Byrdie, DD, Cowboy - hi!

Till tonight!

[Lavande]

Good Monday morning Nesters!

Mondays certainly are not the problem they used to be, ha ha

Pav, CONGRATS to you on your 1000 AF days :yay: :welldone:
Have a great day today!

Justme, I was raised to be a control freak. My Mom's exact words were 'Control or be controlled'! This was her way of helping me find a way to deal with a seriously oppressive Dad. No wonder I ended up massively confused. It is true that things will unfold, as they should if we simply allow the universe to handle that stuff
I hope you get the business that is best for you!!

Hello to everyone & wishing for a great AF day for all!

Lav

[Byrdlady]

Lav, it's a hard reality when we realize that maybe our parents had flaws, too.

Monday here and off to the races! We'll how everything goes this week, hoping for the best!
Here's to a productive week for all! Byrdie

[KENSHO]

Morning! NS, I will take time to do that, interesting exercise. COWBOY, thanks for the reassurance that this is confusing to everyone and time + AF tends to work things out. LAV, Yes, I like the thought of letting the universe sort itself out; it usually tends to do that.

I'm starting to feel the light change - PAV, I know you are sensitive to that as well. Aug & Sept. are not my favorite months as I seem to go through a mini-depression. One foot in front of the other!

Glad to see you G, its nice when you are around.

Happy Monday :victorious:

[lifechange]

Hi everyone!
Kensho, interesting that you mentioned that. I also seem to have a mini depression at the end of each summer.. though I love Autumn, it's the light thing.. I am working on my daily anxiety which occurs as day turns to night.. I don't really mind evening once it's dark, but I tend to feel a bit sad/anxious as the change occurs.. especially when it happens so early in the day! Glad you posted yesterday.. the replies helped me as well.

I've got the girls with me now which in the past has been a trigger for drinking..sad but true.. it crossed my mind for a couple of seconds while, as we were riding our bikes home, one was in a bad mood and the other was talking my ear off.. then I remembered that I already had them with me a whole week + as I quit drinking.. and it was a wonderful time. So I ate something immediately upon arriving home then had a 20 minute nap.. we all sat together at the table afterwards and had an amazing heart to heart, where they were able to talk about problems they're having communicating and getting along with each other.. with me! as the moderator, they were able to understand each other and find things they could work on to improve their relationship.. If I had been drinking, there's no way that could have happened.. I wouldn't have even noticed they were having such problems.. or I would have been impatient and told them to take some time apart which in this case wasn't the best solution, or yelled at them to shut up or drop it..
I am 100% better as a mother when I'm sober AND I enjoy them.. I love spending time with them and having them around.. when I'm drinking, it's a different story.

So, good days. It's so nice to be finding gratitude again..

[Guitarista]

Rawking day 16.

I have seen that if i walk my best truest path, the universe opens a few cool doors. I try to have a daily attitude of love and compassion (for myself and others). And gratitude. Hope all are good. G

:llama:

[Lavande]

Good evening Nesters,

LC, I am glad to hear you are enjoying time with your girls

G, awesome on day 16 - keep going friend!

I have my daughter & granddaughter here overnight. We will be leaving early tomorrow morning to head to the beach, yay. Don't know when I will be able to check in so I hope everyone stays on plan & keeps the momentum going.
Wishing everyone a safe night in the nest!

Lav

[Pavati]

Hi, All:

Good to see you, G. Stick with us!

Kensho - Amen, sister. I dread the darkness, but I don't feel the feeling usually until later in the season as the days get warm and it feels like summer here in September and October. A friend of mine swears by that light - I forget what they're called - that you put on your desk or computer? Also, Vitamin D.

As for your husband - I see Cowboy's point, but that ticks me off that he isn't more supportive. I found that I could address my issues with my marriage more quickly, but also that the big blow ups didn't happen nearly as often because we were dealing with the issues.

I spent the weekend having fun and literally partying three nights in a row. We were silly, danced our butts off and generally made utter fools of ourselves at a relative's wedding. I now know that I was "acting drunk!" Actually, I was talking to my sister who asked me if I missed drinking. I said, the truth, that sometimes it can take me longer to get in to a party mood, and sometimes I skip parties I wouldn't in the past, but otherwise I am SO GLAD I don't drink any more. I felt fine in the mornings, had clear conversations well into the wee hours, and never regretted anything. It did take time to get there, and I avoided MANY parties in the past, but you will get through it.

Good night, all.

Pav

[KENSHO]

Howdy! Feeling good this morning. I started my FREE 3 month membership to a local pilates studio - that I won! HA! I won something!! It was an interesting class - the movements so foreign to my body. I think I will like it.

The husband and I called truce. We both have things to work on. All I know is that by 6 months AF this last June, I felt very level headed, and knew what was MY responsibility and what was his. I'm not excusing bad behavior, but I think as time passes, I will get more perspective and address things calmer. I was definitely a little out of whack the past 3 weeks - highly anxious, stressed, trouble focusing, etc. - feeling a bit in a frenzy. I am not fun to be around in those instances, and well, let's see - hmmm, that's just about the time I stopped drinking. SO, here's to relaxation, exercise, deep breathing, and TIME to heal.

Happy Tuesday!

[Byrdlady]

Good Afternoon, Nesters!
Busy as can be here.....honestly, half of my problems are PICNIC issues (Problem In Chair, Not In Computer) Excel kicked my butt this morning, but hubs finally got it figured out. My computer also has a quirk about deleting....sometimes after I delete a message it goes back up to the oldest messages! Then I have to scroll all the way down again....it's a little thing, but sometimes it gets stuck and I delete things I shouldn't. I've called IT twice. I tell you, I have NO PATIENCE with computers, it is amazing that I can sit for hours with cakes and cookies.... frosting them, doing delicate work, but anything on the computer makes me nuts!

Hope everyone has a peaceful day!! Byrdie

[lifechange]

I hear ya, Byrdie! I feel fortunate that I basically only need my computer to check emails, MWO and Netflx! ok, I search the web sometimes.. but I don't have to rely on it for work.. Seems like you haven't had much time lately for baking..?

Kensho, it does make sense that the first 3 weeks of not drinking could be a bit rocky.. I know in the past it has taken time for me to learn how to trust myself again, to know which boundaries to set, to know what I'm willing to put up with and not. I'm already beginning to feel stronger.. but it takes time! Good for you with the pilates! 3 free months is awesome..

Pav, sounds like a lot of fun at the wedding.. I look forward to when I can have a fun time "partying" without feeling self conscious and stupid.. I do love being able to talk until the wee hours without worrying about the morning. I love going to bed with a clear head waking up Un-hung to enjoy my coffee. Simple pleasures that I missed out on for a long time..
I had the first thoughts this afternoon about how much time I've wasted with drinking the past 25 years.. but I decided not to dwell on it and to instead look at what I could STILL do with my time now that I'm not wasting it.. so much I want to do!

G-man! So happy to hear you rockin' day 16.. 17 by now! love what you said about doors opening.. I notice that, too... very cool.

Lav, hope you all had a lovely day at the beach! Where do you go to the beach? I'm confused as to where you are.. We are doing our best to enjoy the last days of summer!

Today I was washing salad and noticed something moving around in the water.. I fished out a little lady bug that stayed on my wrist, walking circles around a friendship bracelet my daughter gave me, for a very long time.. I tried to move her onto a plant but she wouldn't budge, stayed glued to me. Even little things like her visit mean a lot to me now.. All the things that just 2 weeks ago I either wouldn't have noticed or would have been feeling too shitty to enjoy. I was feeling rough, to say the very least..

So happy to be in the company of you all..
good night!

[available]

morning nesters

Quick check in. busy day, work and then my course so wont be home till 10pm. makes for a tired day on thursday but have been sick the last couple of weeks. need some motivation thrown at me. i sometimes think why the hell am i doing this at my age but its something i really want to do even for a few years and i so need to leave my job i am in. job satisfaction has long walked out the door.

kensho i found i was angry for a month at least when i stopped drinking. angry i could not drink, angry i had lost my best friend, angry at myself, angry others could drink and i couldnt. an endless list of anger but then i pulled the grateful out and life became easier. i also realised i cant change others thoughts and feelings, only mine.

LC feeling grateful is what it is about. I had nothing to be grateful for when drinking. Now a bad day is better than a drinking day. so happy for you that you had some quality time with your girls. my drinking seemed to get worse when the children were more independent and god handling teenagers drunk was a nightmare now i look back at it. but they have turned out to be good grown ups.

well 6am and about to put a face on.

glad you had a lovely time partying pav.

take care x

[Pavati]

Hi, All:

Quick check in. This work project is testing my emotional fortitude in what I guess is a good way. Forcing me to work on de-stressing intentionally.

Hope all is well.

Pav

[jane27]

Belated congrats to my sobriety sisters Pav & Ava for knocking 1000 glorious days right out of the ball park! Nicely done and thanks as always for helping lead me in my journey. Xoxo