Newbies Nest

[Eloise]

Haha.... chopsticks = under control!
Headed to airport in 2 hours. Maybe you can keep an eye on PP1 for say a week?

Tony- sorry to hear you drank. I think we have all been there...
Kinda why I was saying slow down, rest... it takes a tremendous effort to stay on top of this the first year... even two years. At least this has been my experience. We have to start dealing with all the emotions that set us to drinking and then over drinking , in the first place.

Already talk of drinking in my new environment... some teachers staying in their room to drink wine instead of joining for dinner. That is not going to be me!

Get right back at it Tony... pretty sure you learnt a bit about how your brain is going to try and trick you. Where is Fin?!

Good Morning, Nesters.

Eloise, it's GREAT NEWS to hear you got your visa! Exciting things ahead for you! We are thinking of you and hope you have an easy transition! Brush up on your chop stix etiquette!

Tony, we ALL feel your pain. Believe me, none of us are going to cast stones. This is a place for support and we are here to give it. Get right back up and onwards we go. We'll be right by your side.

As Ava would say, TFIF....... eheheheh. It's only Friday, not a ticket to Boozeville!! Stay strong, eva'body!!! Byrdie

[Guitarista]

Safe travels Eloise. How excitement!

Happy 50 Kensho! Well done big buddy.

Let us know how you're doing hey Tony?

Ok fruity's, The weekend aint no ticket to no boozeville see? L8tr g8trs.

[Byrdlady]

Happy Sattidy, Nesters!
Kensho, 50 days is AH-Mazin! GREAT JOB! I wish I had some amswers about your hubs.
Eloise you are prolly winging your way across the ocean as we speak! We are thinking of you!!! Safe travels!!
Pav, you've got us all pegged! Bah!
That mind chatter is a bitc*! I did 2 things, I pushed the thoughts out and distracted myself AND I did like Pav and took the option off the table. FIND another way to cope. It took practice but I finally got it!
Hugs to all, Byrdie

[lifechange]

Hi Nesters!!
I missed you all!
I spent the beginning of last week preparing myself for a presentation I'd agreed to give on Thursday.. I am the shyest of shy people if I have to talk in front of others.. even if it's just sharing ideas or introducing myself around a table I begin to sweat and my heart goes crazy and my voice shakes. For this event I had to speak in front of 100 people.. only for 20 minutes (an eternity) and I had a colleague sharing the responsibility. I'm very happy to say I did it without dying or even fainting and I got positive feedback! I've never done anything like that before and had taken it on as a personal challenge. Because I'm not drinking! I was able to concentrate to practice, to make smart decisions about what I wanted to say, to intelligently answer questions and, most importantly for me, I was able to keep calm using some 3P's stuff and a bit of meditation. I honestly didn't freak out at all until about 10 minutes ahead of time and even then it wasn't so bad. Yay!! This opens up so many possibilities for me.. having conquered the fear! And I didn't procrastinate!

Byrdie, thank you for re-posting the planning aspect of getting and staying sober.. and Pav, loved your post about taking the option to drink completely off the table. For me as well, that's the biggest silencer of the mind chatter.

Kensho, big Congrats on 50 days.. I am so proud of you. And happy you're having some great days, despite all the work.

Tony, I hope you'll get right back in here.. you, too, JKM. Just make the commitment to get that first day again. It's the hardest after having decided to drink again.. but then day 2 is such a relief. At least that's been my experience. :hug:

Here's a nice post I read today by Holly at Hip Sobriety.. a lot of you know her.. I love her writing.
15 Things I Do To Maintain Sobriety After 4 Years In Recovery. — HIP SOBRIETY

Big hugs and shout outs to everyone flying by or stopping in the Nest today.. I love this place!

[Guitarista]

You are a ROCKSTAR LC! :thumbsup:

But let's talk about me......day 50. I cannot find any reason to go back to a life of average in everything. The possibilities for an ol fella like me are still amazingly full fun and endless. Sheeshkabab! Loving it.

How r u JKM and Tony?

There are no chains here anymore. No shackles, no borders, no barriers, no obstacles. Nothing is too difficult. My way is clear.

A safe, sober and magical weekend to all.

[Guitarista]

Morning nesters!

Lovely to hear how things are becoming for you LC.

Happy 50 Kensho and Gman....onward and upwards!

Thanks KY. Have a beaut sunday my friend.

[available]

Morning nesters

A lovely drying day today so lots of washing to be had and a day off tomorrow. Life is good.

My daughter had her birthday yesterday so i felt a tad like a drink to celebrate. Celebrating with my children by drinking was a fun time for me, well i associated it as fun back then but not now. My tolerance for drunks is zero and thats not a bad feeling to have, it reminds me of where i never want to be even if i do have those thoughts occasionally. Of course facebook posted a past photo of her 21st and there i was with a glass in my hand or a goblet. I didnt look happy then and that was a year before i stopped the madness.

I agree with you Pav that life was going downhill drinking rapidly but i didnt realise how much until i stopped. I was so scared i would be bored when i stopped drinking but somedays there are not enough hours in those 24. You are sounding good.

Tony,I hope you dont have a case of the f#ck its. We have all been there and done that, i remember it took me 4 months to get back on track when i made the decision to stop. Thought i could control my drinking since i had stopped for 11 days and then 42 days. Boy was i wrong. The 100 day mark was hard when i hit it and i am sure a lot of long termers remember the "what now period". Life had not gotten to where i wanted it to and in 100 days it should have. Nearly 3 years down the track and it is finally getting to where i want it to be and if it takes another few years then thats okay. Remember you have a garden to finish and a gate to hang!

LC so proud of you girl for doing that talk, amazing what we can do sober. I never would be doing this course if i had been drinking,i would never be picking people up at nighttime if i had been drinking, never be typing here if i had been drinking. So many positives in our lives now.

Just, happy kid visiting and i bet you are grateful now to that co-worker, if only she knew how she has changed your life for the better.

A big congrats to Kensho and G for the big 50.

Well time for me to do some cleaning and enjoy the day.

Take care x

[Lavande]

Good Saturday evening Nesters,

Rain & clouds off & on all day but that's OK. We had a nice visit with our daughter & her family, fun times.
Not a drop of AL in sight, perfect

CONGRATS on 50 AF days Kensho & G :welldone:
Don't ever look back, just keep moving forward with no regrets!

Eloise, safe travels!

LC, awesome on your speaking event. I blab a lot around here but I am not much into public speaking either, good for you!!! The benefits of an AF life are endless

Justme, enjoy your weekend with the kids, very nice.

Tony, have you checked in today? Please do so soon.

Wishing everyone a safe & comfy night in the nest!

Lav

[wagmor]

Oh buddy, been there so many times. The real work starts around 100 days. The novelty has waned and the voice comes back. I'm now putting things into place that will take me though that stage when I get there again. You can do the same. The important thing is to get back to work and not beat yourself up too much. We CAN do this.

Yes Fin, This ^ So glad you mentioned working now to prepare for the time after 100 days. You've reminded me to get my butt in gear and start preparing for my own path after 100. I fell hard after the last time I reached 100+ days, thinking I could now somehow magically moderate. What I learned is, no - I can't moderate. It took me more than a year to crawl back out of that ditch I'd thrown myself in, but I'll be damned if I'll do that to myself again. Thanks so much for saying this.

Tony, Fin is right - get back to work, and don't beat yourself up too much. WE ALL CAN DO THIS.

[wagmor]

Kensho and Gman - congrats on 50! Halfway to triple digits and going strong - so glad to be sharing this journey with you both.

Pav - loved what you said about just getting it clear in your mind that you cannot drink, and how that helped stop the chatter. For me the same has been true. When I just make drinking non-negotiable, I don't tend to think about it too much, don't try to bargain with myself about it. As soon as I make it an option (a "reward", which it ISN'T, or a well-deserved escape, or whatever, I lose traction). I'm back in steadfast non-negotiable land now and it's really so much easier.

Lav, Byrd, Ava, NoSugar - thanks for all of your steady and unconditional support here. The nest wouldn't be the same without you.

[Byrdlady]

LC, glad that speech is behind you! Practice really IS the key, at least for me, I do not have the ability to wing it. Im so proud of you!

GMan, 50 dats is EPIC! You and Kensho are quit-mates! How cool is that!!! Keep up the great work!

I was having a conversation with my hubs yesterday and he asked me if I thought I could drink one now and be ok. I told him without question, NO! It just works on you and chips away at you, it eats at you until you test it again and again. Besides, if Im honest, I dont want just one I want to get wasted. Deprivation isnt not having any, its just having one or two! I reinforced to him that I can never drink safely. I honestly believe that he thinks I should be cured by now. If he only knew the mind of an alkie.....the only cure for this disease is to starve it. At least thats what Ive seen, and seeing is believing.

Getting a new washer today, ours fried yesterday when we started it up. Not a moment too soon, Im out of underwear!

Hope everyone has an easy day. Byrdie

[Lavande]

Good evening Nesters,

So Byrdie, are you going commando untilyour new washer arrives? Ha ha!!!
I am spoiled & need to have everything working at all times

Wagmor, We are here to continue to help in anyway we can - helps keep us humble & on track too!

It rained off & on in these parts again today so I've been busy getting things ready for a Nov 1 craft show, fun stuff
Wishing everyone a very safe night in the nest. Yes, we can all do this

Lav

[Jkm123]

Thanks for the support everyone

[NoSugar]

How are you doing, Jkm? It's great to see you here :hug:.

[Jkm123]

I'm ok no sugar. Sober today, trying sleep with no valium tonight. Everyone is out of the house and me and the dogs are catching up on our shows.