Newbies Nest

[Pavati]

Hi, All:

I told only my husband and my therapist at first, along with a friend who is one of us and told me about MWO to begin with. I told them all of the gory details because I wanted to be held accountable.

Then as people asked I told them slowly - just that I didn't really drink any more. I found that there are a couple of friends (well, acquaintances) who always announce "Pav doesn't drink" to anyone who will listen. It sounds weird to me, and I think they are the ones who have a problem. Mostly I just quietly order my sparkling water. I know there were MANY people who had no idea I had quit until a year or more later. I just always had a cup in my hand at parties, and not everyone asked what was in it. Amazing how the lives of many people revolve around alcohol, but also amazing how many people's lives DON'T revolve around alcohol.

Off to deal with teenaged drama.

Have fabulous nights.

Pav

[Justme Again]

Morning Nesters!

Welcome Roobs! Hi LS!

Nursie - what a great story about your soup! It is wonderful to gain back something al took from us. Wish you lots of strenght with your FIL & MIL.

J-vo - I went on a christmas holiday with inlaws early in my first serious quit. Think it was 10 days. They are all big drinkers and I used to drink with them. I said things like : I want to be healthy. Their questions were typically that from people who have a problem themselves. I answered those the way I would have like to be answered when I was still big on drinking. I ate well and went to bed early. It wasn't a fun holiday, but more due to internal family drama. If things with your family is ok, it might be fine.

Have a good Wednesday.

[mario]

Hi all just checking in,
I can't post to everyone as I on small phone and my fingers need to go on a diet.

Welcome to all new folks n old, it's great to see this thread rolling along everyday as we can all take the positives that we are not alone in this fight,We have all been there and none of us are any better than anyone else, I get great positive and encouraging vibes in reading MWO, it's another tool to use, so keep posting n sharing, you are helping others and in turn helping oneself.

[j-vo]

Nursie, that's a great story. My husband is just like you. He loves to cook for others.

I'm getting observed this morning, so I need to make a few more mental notes. Hope everyone in the nest has a great day!

[Lavande]

Good morning Nesters, happy Humpday

Just wanted to leave this for everyone to read - means a lot to all of us I think.
DailyOM - Your Allies On Life's Journey

Have a wonderful AF day everyone!

Lav

[Roobs]

Good morning all,
Lav, I love your daily om link. I feel I've found my online tribe right here. It's so comforting to know that there are so many of us out there who wish to quit drinking and that there are many who or are succeding at an AF life. My husband knows how much I hate myself when I drink but others do not. In the past, when I wasn't drinking I've told people I was on medication (partially true). I've always left the door slightly open so that if I fail or take a sip It's not that big of a deal. I guess my commitment has never been 100%. This time around I want to be more honest, tell a few people I feel safe with so I'm held accountable.

Nurse, I guess soup really does soothe the soul.
Just me again, I'm impressed you were able to hang on through a holiday with the in laws.
Mario, thanks for the support. I read your story, you are quite an inspiration. Seriously.

[Struggles 106]

Good morning nesters-
Hi Nursie!

I am on day 31, so I guess I can call it a month-
Feeling quite good. One of my neighbors was verbally abusive and very rude to my daughter the other day. Good thing I'm not drinking HAHA

I wanted to share another story from the past; it's funny how I remember more and more. This one is terrible-
I was out with some engineers from work (prob 2010 or so) and of course drank WAY too much. At the second bar I'm not sure what happened, but I became aware of reality standing outside with the manager waiting for a cab.
I asked him what I had done and he said I threw stuff at the bartender.
The cab came and I went home. I then knocked on my neighbors door and got her to take me back over there (not even a mile away) to get my car, drove it home. Absolute insanity. I later apologized to my neighbor, told her the truth and she was terrific. Came here to MWO and was sober for quite a while.

*SIGH* Maybe I should write a book. But the stories are not interesting; they're simply horrifying that a person could continue in this way for decades.

Hey Gman-the uke is tuned to gCEA, but you are a REAL musician so you can do weird tunings HAHA-I do well to mange standard guitar tuning, but then again I've never really tried. THat is the thing about the uke-if it's out of tune at all it sounds so goofy!

Love to all and happy Wednesday

Ann C

[Lost Soul]

Hi all,

Thank you Byrdie for the warm welcome back :hug: I'm reading pages from the longterm abstainers section to rekindle some motivation & positive thinking - found my first post in the nest on pg 178 - very strange... Very wise words on the holidays - they can be both the happiest for some or hold sad memories for others, not to mention the Christmas work parties...A hard time for many of us & a good time to stay vigilant.

...I had posted a longer reply but timed out. Just checking in as my Day 4 is nearly over - wishing all a restful night
LS

[Roobs]

Hi Lost Soul,
Congratulations on day 4. I'm on day 2. Let's do this! Today I texted a friend who is coming over for thanksgiving. I told her I will NOT be drinking on T-Day and that I wanted to tell her because I wanted to be accountable and I knew she wouldn't judge me. It was oddly freeing to tell someone other than my husband. Scary but freeing.
Hope everyone is well.

[Byrdlady]

Checking in from the road, I survived my meeting. It went ok, looks like its all about price. So we'll see. Made a few cold calls so it was a good day. It was topped off by a call from Rahul! Yes, OUR Rahul. He was in the US for a tradeshow and gave me a buzz, gosh, it was great to talk with him. Best of all, he is celebrating 1000 days today! Just an amazing accomplishmnet So proud of him! So I had a very good day!
Sleep tight, Nesters, Byrdie

[ThirdTimesACharm]

It can be the simplest and most mundane things that give us cravings and make us want to jump off the wagon.

After 40 days of very few cravings or times of weakness at all, today I was feeling like I just really could use a nice long cold beer. Just one... a nice big 20oz one. Ok maybe two or three or four...

Instead of giving in, I interrogated myself to attempt to determine why I was feeling so compromised. Well, it turned out it was three little things that all conspired to make me think I really needed a drink: 1) I was thirsty and likely dehydrated 2) I was unusually and uncomfortably hot (my wife had turned up the heat last night and I didn't realize) and 3) I had the beginnings of a headache.

Once I realized what the real problem was I took steps to correct it - chugged a liter of cold seltzer, turned down the heat and went for a walk outside in the 45F sunshine.

In just 20 minutes, I went from craving AL and ready to cave to squarely back on the wagon.

ThirdTimesACharm

[Guitarista]

Good job 3T!

Would've been a buzz hearing from Rahul Byrdy! I hope he finds the time to write one of his eloquent beautiful posts. Happy 1000 Rahul! :thumbs:

Nursie's soup for the soul!

Cool on the uke playing Ann!

Day 96. Remember nesters, just do your best friends.

[daisy45]

Happy 1000 Rahul!
Back to square one for me........my disapppointment is 3-fold.."my daughters are hurt.
Can't take any more self-hate....promised them, yet again, that I will get there.
I will.

[Lavande]

Good evening Nesters,

Daisy, just keep trying, no matter what!

G, I made soup today too. It made me happy

3T, remembering to use the HALT tool saves us every time, good for you. It takes time to get away from those old habits, you're doing great!

Rahul, congrats on your 1000 AF days :welldone:

Glad your day turned out better than expected Byrdie.

Wishing everyone a safe night in the nest!

Lav

[Nursie]

Quick check in for me again. I almost turned on my hypnosis tape and forgot to post!

Daisy, you can do this. You want to do it and you are here. You came back. I know this feeling, I do. Keep trying my friend. I'm here for you and with you!!

Crazy day again here. FIL still in the hospital. MIL still with us. It will definitely be at least a few more days. If I were still drinking I could have never dealt with her being here! I would have been sneak drinking to "deal" with it and would have been "suddenly" drunk after sneaking too much and would wake up at 3 am trying to piece together the night.
Instead, I visited the hospital, cooked a nice dinner, helped my son with his homework, had a nice hot cuppa tea....oh, and I also took a call from my sister who was having a freak out from stress in nursing school. She called at 8pm crying because she had so many deadlines. I was able to talk to her and help her feel better. Because SOBER. Otherwise I would have been drunk talking or not even answered the phone.
So I feel pretty good. Tired but good.
12 days today I think? Tomorrow is that magic number 13 Byrdie tells us about!
I have hit that number many many times. But happy to hit it again. I think it's sinking in now, kind of like a death (or birth?) that it's over. It's gone. The new life is here and there is no changing it.
Grateful tonight.
Nursie