Newbies Nest

[scottish lass]

Hi all - doing a drive by - busy with work, long days and exhausted at end.

Glad to have had a dry Jan and onto a dry Feb.

Nothing to write about today - all staff meeting today, as an introvert they drain me. management meeting yesterday to plan - as a J (in myers briggs) way too late to plan a meeting for over 300 people, so that drained me too - is it the weekend yet???

Stay strong everyone - glad to 'see' you again j-vo!

[KENSHO]

Nursie, I love your post about your son! It’s so special when we can be there for our kids! Keep celebrating life! personally, I think that as long as that remains the focus, we can’t go wrong. I thought Cowboy’s idea was great.

Marthadan - way to give yourself permission to just be (as long as you don’t drink).

JVO, thank goodness people like you (and a variety of others here) teach our children - especially at that age - I think your job is harder than most. Thank you.

I've been feeling a little funky. All is good, but the energies here have shifted, and I've found it hard to adapt. It is helping to focus on FIRST - not drinking, and SECOND - loving myself and my family & friends. If there is a third, it's having some creative outlet. Everything else can wait if I need it to. I will have to say that I rarely crave drinking anymore. I mostly think of it in terms of a past thing that I want to avoid - versus a current struggle. I don't want to get overconfident, but I can reassure those who are struggling that the struggle gets less and less with time. I am a non-drinker now, I am proud of it, I identify with it and I've begun to build bridges around that old part of my life - I've found other pathways that work so much better. Keep up the hard work, it gets greater and better and so much more enjoyable!

[Pavati]

Hi, All:

Nursie - that sounds like a great party. I don't have any advice for keeping it light - I like what Pauly said though. You are CELEBRATING! Congratulations.

I have a busy day - a lot going on in home life and work this week. Need to remember exercise and taking care of myself.

Happy (Sober) Hump Day!

Pav

[Dutch1988]

Nursie good luck on the party. It can take a few to realize that alcohol doesn't have to be a part of he celebration, fake it till you make it!

[marthadan]

Hi everyone, thanks for the great posts. Nursie - love cowboys idea of the speech at the beginning! And AG's less-said-the-better. At the end of the day - enjoy your special day in the way that honors YOU.
Just survived my first afternoon with my drinking friends with me not drinking. I keep panicking that it's too soon to be around them - that I'll start trying to negotiate with myself. But something seems to have clicked. I don't want to tempt the Gods, but I was ok with drinking my hot ginger turmeric water as they got on with their cocktails. I'll definitely be trying to avoid those scenes. But I'm relieved to feel ok to not drink! Good night. Bless.

[Lost Soul]

Hi All,
Hope everyone is well, very little to report really, except my new fruit bowl arrived today...I know, its the thrilling things in life!
Lav, yes getting on indeed - a grand old 8years next month!
Nursie, lovely to hear you enjoyed your sons birthday, more so that you are really are not missing AL & sound really dedicated to your quit, a really super place to be :heartbeat: great ideas from everyone - Im sure all your family will love celebrating with you & seeing you so well & happy after everything you've been through, ABC's focusing on moving forward is a great idea x
Kensho - really helpful to hear how you finding your sobriety & how managing cravings is more of a past struggle :hug:
SL, well done on achieving a dry Jan - looking forward to an AF Feb too x
Pav, hope you get through everything you have on & get time to relax this weekend x
Marthadan - glad you got through your catch up with friends & sounding strong, it can be a worry how you will get through different situations & is tough to get balance between old habits & patterns and times when you will be around other people drinking, & think you handled it well & should be proud!
Wishing all a safe and sober Thursday
LS

[Byrdlady]

Evening, nest!
Nursie, Im not sure which birthday this will be for you, but its pretty easy for me to make my not drinking age or ailment related.
If someone asks why you arent drinking, tell them it gives you the trots. :toilet:That will shut them up! Bahaha! I get good mileage out of telling people its on the top 10 list of things that disrupt my delicate constitution, along with raw onions, nuts, popcorn, broccoli, cheese, Vitamin D and strawberries. "I just cant tolerate stuff like I used to". Tell people you have the pallet of a twelve year old. I have a friend who says she already drank her share. I bet it wont even come up, but if it does, you will have an array of responses!

I gave my presentation to my hubs today, what a disaster, I have a lot of work to do.
Have a good evening, Byrdie

[Lavande]

Good evening Nesters,

Not much happening in Lav-land but that's OK!

Great to see so many checking in today.
Nursie, nice about your son's birthday, glad he was happy. I just automatically give the 'I feel better when I don't drink' excuse & no one ever argues with that. I hope your birthday celebration is excellent

Wishing everyone a safe & comfy night in the nest!
Byrdie, take lots of deep breaths & try that presentation again, ha ha.

Lav

[Nursie]

Hi everyone, thanks for the great posts. Nursie - love cowboys idea of the speech at the beginning! And AG's less-said-the-better. At the end of the day - enjoy your special day in the way that honors YOU.
Just survived my first afternoon with my drinking friends with me not drinking. I keep panicking that it's too soon to be around them - that I'll start trying to negotiate with myself. But something seems to have clicked. I don't want to tempt the Gods, but I was ok with drinking my hot ginger turmeric water as they got on with their cocktails. I'll definitely be trying to avoid those scenes. But I'm relieved to feel ok to not drink! Good night. Bless.

Martha, how do you make your ginger turmeric water? I found the actual turmeric roots in the store and I've been using it in rice, soups, etc but I would love to make that water! I also really don't know how to preserve the roots so they don't go bad. Any tips?

[Nursie]

Thanks everybody, I'm not too worried about it. I am not ashamed of quitting or admitting I have a problem. I just didn't want that to be the highlight of the day!

I got my chemo port removed today! Minor surgery, in office. That's a huge deal because it signifies another step for my remission!

I told you my stepdaughter moved in with us right? She has been having a lot of very sad issues with her mom who is bipolar. Stepdaughter is too, but more mild. She is 18 and fragile, just trying to improve herself. She is working so hard to be well and be healthy again. She has lost 50 lbs, eats all the nutrition food I make, she helps me shop, clean, etc. she goes to her appointments, and she tells me everything.
Yesterday, her mom told her (again) that she never wants to see her face again and that she is no longer her daughter. She said all the vile things a mother could say. (Just like my bipolar mom did to me when she was sick).
Well I couldn't be at the table for dinner because of the surgery, I was in bed. And stepdaughter came in to check on me. She started to cry and said her heart was beating too fast and she was scared. She was having a panic attack and hyperventilating, crying, worried about everything under the sun. I took her in my arms and held her and stroked her hair just like I did when she was 5. I let her tell me everything that was on her mind. And I told her that she is safe, she is loved, she did nothing wrong, and she is getting better every day". We talked like that for about an hour and she felt much better.
I know some people might think she is too old to be held like that, but please understand she grew up in traumatic circumstances. I don't think that I would have been able to be there for her these past few months if I were still drinking.
I am able to set a good example and to really listen to my kids and my husband. I feel present. I feel stable. I feel reliable!

Thank you for always being here for me. I could not be so successful without the daily support I receive on MWO.

[actiongirl46]

Nursie, so glad you could be there for that poor kid. She is lucky to have you. You are so right, it wouldn't be the same if AL was in the picture. Great job!!

[KENSHO]

Nursie, I'm heartened by you. You are really making a difference in her life. We all need to be held and hair stroked - into our adulthoods. Congratulations on being such a brave soul through your cancer - happy for you that you are on to the next step. You are such an example. Yea! Thank you for sharing!

Im working tonight - big surprise. Billing though, so what I do equals checks written to me, so that is motivation. Praise to everyone here - and those who are not here this day, but will be back (G & others). We are stronger together.

[Roobs]

Nursie, imho, you're never too old to be hugged, held, nurtured and loved. I'm so happy for you and your step daughter to have such a great connection. You're her rock, and a kick ass sober one!!
Enjoy your special day, if you're surrounded by good friends whom already know you're not drinking, they may not even question your AF life. Keep it ligh, celebrate, take it all in!

I've had a couple of alcohol dreams the last few nights. they're dreams where I have "accidentally" had a glass. I don't get wasted but I become panicked and furious with myself knowing that I will head down a drunken road.

I was listening to the bubble hour (thank you Pav) and the addiction specialist Said something interesting; he said that when people have been sober for a long time and they relapse, they may drink or drug the same amount that they previously used. The brain has the memory of the amount previously used but the body may not be able to tolerate that amount after a long time of sobriety which may result in an overdose and or death. I thought it was interesting how our brains hang on to the old memories of tolerance, maybe that contributes to the increased difficulty of Each slip? I was not able to finish the podcast last night but I will revisit this weekend.
Good night everyone,
Roobs.

[mario]

Good morning nesters.

All quite here in my life, which is good.


have a great day all.



wonder where Mr G is ??

[tonyniceday]

Hi nesters
Well that's me through the 1st 2 weeks. I'm now re-targeting. - Any thoughts? I don't know whether to set a third individual week, go for double to 28 days or aim for the 30 day Llama ride (Byrdie!) ... I am still VERY much ODAAT but where did anyone else target themselves after the first couple of weeks?

I've done 90 percent of the Office to make I look like a genuine office - and not one from a war-zone and have a round 3 days more work to get everything ship shape there, plus the dogs to walk, plus starting to prepare the Caravan for the new season, plus starting basic jobs in the garden to prep it for the spring, plus overseeing the restaurant, plus time on my knees praying for snow on the tops so the skiing can finally start.......

So plenty to occupy myself.

Hope everyone is ok and have a great Friday and AF weekend!

Tony