Newbies Nest

[Neo]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi Byrd,
Just had some heavy selling on trading products over christmas and a couple of calls. Been trading for a few years and know that it isn't always easy to make money trading futures etc when these guys tell you they have the magic pill . Worst was in China when they would run after you and come down to 1 Yuan from 10,000 lol

Day 10 - Feeling healthy inside apart from Brain fog/confusion and morning tiredness . Should get better over the fortnight .No major cravings

[mario]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good morning nesters.

Well done Nursie & Kenso Hope you get better soon ADP,

hope lost soul is ok ?

Hi to everyone else, busy few days coming up so it be back to my small phone .

I have found a book that I was using in my early days of recovery that I was using, which is over 8 years ago, & in it I have wrote lots of notes & question's related to my addiction, Its quite revealing to me my state of mind at the time, sure isent hindsight a great thing :-)

Have a great day everyone.

[Nursie]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good Morning all,
Early check in here. I fell asleep so early last night that I am up at 4am! Hahaha
KENSHO huge congrats on 200. Huge! Colossal!

I was in a great mood yesterday. Happy and joking around all day. I decided to cook a ham dinner. (Who cooks a ham on a random Monday?) my husband came home and I was being giggly, silly. He asked me if I was drinking! Nope, just happy. It's fun to let it go, the worries, anger, dissatisfaction, expectations...and just be happy. That's how yesterday was for me. I hope today is like that too!

[wagmor]

Re: Newbies Nest

Nursie - thanks for sharing your day of giggly happiness with us! That's the best. Hope today is that way for you as well

ADP - Feel better :hug:

On my end, celebrated my wedding anniversary yesterday with no al. Actually, never even crossed my mind. Feeling strong on that front. Today will be a day to try to knock several more post-accident tasks off my list - mostly more (MORE!) paperwork filled out and either dropped off or sent via overnight delivery, depending on where it needs to go. Sigh...

Happy day/eve in the nest everyone. Stay tucked in safe and sound.

[Roobs]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hello everyone,

CONGRATULATIONS Kensho!!What a great accomplishment, you sound strong and happy!:welldone::sohappy:

Lav, I feel ya regarding too much idle time leading to crazy self talk. I get a little depressed and irrational when I'm alone and "inside"my head for too long.

Nursie, nothing better than laughter and giggles.

Have a great day everyone.
Roobs

[Readynow79]

Re: Newbies Nest

Just a quick check in as been mad busy and must read back. Two things to report. (1) My mum told me this morning that I seem to have my "sparkle" back. Not sure I knew I ever had sparkle but this sounds like a good thing!
(2) My daughter informed me that my "boobies" have got smaller since I gave up wine. Now I know this is NOT a good thing!!

[dejafoo345]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good morning nesters,

I've had a rough couple of days in that my fiance and I have been struggling. I'm hoping to get some guidance/advice from anyone here who has been through the recovery process with a SO. He knows that I need to be sober and that this is a good thing, but the shift in our lifestyle and what I need from him has been hard. Most of our relationship has involved partying and alcohol, and all of a sudden I need that out of my life. He's trying to walk a fine line of not treating me like I'm sick (although I am), but also being supportive. To be fair, I think I've tried to be stronger than maybe I should, and so I've gone along to hockey games, friend's parties, etc and just worked through the fear/anxiety of being in those social situations. He keeps saying "I can't do anything right" any time I get emotional or tell him that he's putting me in tough situations. Today I finally told him that maybe he needs to look into al-anon because I don't have the answers for him and I can't fix myself AND give him the tools to be the partner of an alcoholic going through this process.

We had an emotional fight this morning, and immediately after I sat down and prayed for my actions to come not from fear or my own self doubt and self will, but to be open/honest and free of doubt. I felt clear headed after and sent him a text telling him that my emotions are coming from that fear and guilt of asking him to change his life. And that I know he's doing his best, but that I can't tell him what he needs to do or have the best advice for his situation.

He was definitely receptive, but I know it will continue to be tough as we proceed through these changes. Anything you all might have learned in your own experience would be wonderful to hear.

:thanks:

[Lost Soul]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi all,
Hope everyone is cosy in the nest :happy2: I am really tired so a very quick check in tonight - wonderful reading & posts, Congratulations to you Kensho on your 200 AF days milestones :heartbeat: & thoughts of strength to everyone dealing with any tough stuff - you are doing so well xxx Thanks Mario - chatting about big issues over at the army at the weekend left me a bit drained & have Brandon's 11th birthday on Thursday so focused on preparations & party planning! Thanks for all the support & wonderfully inspiring messages :hug:
Wishing all a safe & sober Tuesday
LS

[Byrdlady]

Re: Newbies Nest

Deja, theres no question, the recovery process is uncomfortable for all. My hubs had walked out on me because of my drinking, so I was walking a fine line of trying to appear ok while having all those crazy emotions you mention. Some nights I thought I would sit here and be screaming on the inside, the mind chatter was maddening. I didnt want him to see just how badly I was struggling. I was afraid if I let on and revealed how I was really feeling, he would leave me anyway. So I put on a happy face. Over time, the happy face became authentic. I did learn that I had to put my oxygen mask on first before I could help him with his issues. I couldnt help him if I was still screwed up. It took time but we grew into our new roles. He began to see positive changes in me, and in us. It takes time. This is a lifestyle change for the whole household. Hang in there.

We cancelled our Disney trip today because my colitis is in full swing. I just cant seem to get it back under control and the thought of flying in this condition scares the crap out of me. Bah. I just hate that I had to disappoint Mick and his beautiful wife. All that planning! I hate colitis almost as much as I hate AL.

Hope everyone has a good evening. Byrdie

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good evening Nesters,

Nice night to be sitting in front of the fire as it's turned chilly & rainy here.

Ready - no wine = smaller boobs? Who knew? Ha ha! If that actually means you have lost a few pounds then good for you

deja, I think all of our families need time to adjust to these changes.
I went thru a lot with my husband when I quit. He knew he had some changes to make too & it was more than a little awkward. The bottom line is you are responsible for yourself & he is responsible for himself. Maybe at some point the two of you could sit down & talk it over with a counselor or therapist. For now your focus needs to stay on your quit. Glad you are with us

Wishing everyone a safe night in the nest!

Lav

[paulywogg]

Re: Newbies Nest

Sorry your suffering Byrdie and sorry you had to cancel your trip,I'm sure Mick understands though, Ready,when my good friend quit drinking her hubs was mad cuz they were drinking buddies and he actually told her that her boobs were shrinking to get her to drink with him again yikes!hope everyone has a peaceful day/night

[Orimus]

Re: Newbies Nest

GMAE all!

Hypernova - Fantastic job on putting away those first 30 days! There might be another hill to climb tomorrow but that will only lead us upward. :0) cU cU

ADP – Hope you got some rest and feel better today. Good to hear your quit is still going strong.

Wag – Happy anniversary.

Ready – 1) I wonder if the stars know that they shine? 2) lol

Deja - So sorry to hear you're going through a rough patch. As has been said this is a change for you both and unfortunately is one of those squalls that must be weathered. I can only suggest to stay authentic, compassionate to yourself and your fiance and keep the communication open. And above all protect the new, non-drinking you. The storm will pass even though it might not feel like it. <hugs>

Byrdie - Sorry you had to cancel your trip. That's rotten all around.

LS - Hope you and the army worked through those big issues and you get some good rest. Happy birthday to your son.

An average day at the bunker - a day playing with spreadsheets mostly. Reworking a few of our processes. TED.com was down during lunch so found a Tony Robbins clip to watch while eating. Thinking I should probably tone down taking the long way home from work - takes me down past the lakes but adds a significant amount of time to my commute. The thought of a drink when I got home floated there briefly but arguing with myself as I get closer to home is almost non-existent as it's overpowered by the memory of the scent of incense, the sound of the chimes leading to meditation. A bowl of pasta with ricotta and NCIS, an hour reading about Taoism or personal finances and then it's time to see how long it takes sleep to take me. At this point it's more the myofacial movement - leftovers from last years CAF - that steal my zzzzzs but they seem to have quieted significantly and taken away a lot of tension. We'll have to see.

30 days done and tomorrow's looking bright.

Have a great AF night all!

[lifechange]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi Nesters,
i've missed all of you and being here a lot.. and probably I should have logged on long ago. But I was pushing everything to the back of my mind so as not to have to think. I didn't have enough sober time (or didn't have the strength) to deal with everything that was going on.. at least that's how it felt. Which sucks because we all know that alcohol doesn't help anything or anyone. I didn't "overdo" it but I've been trying/wanting to quit long enough to know not to fool myself with thoughts of moderation.. I also know that I don't want to hurt my body and mind any more with alcohol, in any amount. I also know that my life is always better without and that the short few weeks I've had consistently without it have been the best in all the years I've been drinking.
So I have managed to move on from the relationship I was in and trying to leave for 3 years, I've moved house with the girls and the surgery was successful.. I wish I could say I'd done it all sober. I know that with that I would have gained so much strength and self confidence.
I'm on the fence sometimes with not knowing whether or not talking so much about it helps me..? I do feel like it helped a lot in January to be here twice a day, to let it all out, to meet up with all of you.. but then, despite that I decided to drink.. Which makes me a bit worried that I'm a hopeless cause. Just f******* do it. Anyway, I'm still not giving up. I probably should look into a real life therapist though. I've said that before and I know it's helped a lot of you..
Kensho, Congrats on 200 days! amazing..
and Orimus on 30! and Hypernova on 30!

Going to read back a bit further now..

[Neo]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hey Lifechange,
First week is always going to suck. There were a few I'm quitting , I'm quitting Days in Jan but didn't get there . The first week hump and so many temptations for me . I got rid of smokes as well . It gets easier in a short time . Eat well, get grapes , keep off sugar , mega B+ . Day 11 for me and feeling better this evening than I have the last 10 days . You will be tired , you will get pissed off , but get to the double digits and do what you can to get there

YouCanDoIt1.jpg

[mario]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good morning nesters

Hope you get well soon byrdy that's a bummer having to cancel your trip,
Well done to everyone in getting to there own personal victories & milestones, it shows that what ever you are doing is working for you at this moment in time, Getting clean is a long and painful journey & yet we still have to deal with our shortcomings & the human problems we all face everyday .


Yet by following our own personnel paths to freedom from this misery we can escape & get free, There are many threads on this forum of people who have got clean & in how they have achieved that, from Medical to AA, Go read them & study them & hopefully one will jump out at you & work for oneself . You get out of what you put in & as I have learned having the knowledge is all well & good but feck all use if you don't put the words into action everyday. constant effort is necessary.

Have a good day folks.