Newbies Nest

[Nursie]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi Nest,
Wildflowers, awesome post! Big hugs to you for writing all that out.
Kim, you're doing this thing girl! Little by little. Stick with us!
Kensho, I have been having drinking thoughts too. I had another bad dream last night too.
This time in my dream, I was HAMMERED. Each person I came into contact with shunned me. I was ostracized by everyone because I couldn't act sober. I was crying and saying "I really messed up this time, it's NOT just a dream this time, how am I gonna tell MWO, on and on.
When I finally woke up this morning, I had tears on my face and I was SOOO grateful to be sober! I thanked God over and over.

Then in the afternoon I had drinking thoughts again. Pissed me off. I'm taking my Antabuse because I cannot afford a slip.
I have come too far to mess this up now!

Off to bed. Let's strap on the velcro peeps!!

[mario]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good morning nesters,

Good post wildflowers ,

On of my chief activator of my defects has been my self centred fear, Primarily fear that i would lose something i already processed or would fail to get something i demanded, Living upon a bases of unsatisfied demands i was in a state of continual disturbance & frustration, Therefore, no peace was to be had unless I could find a way of reducing these demands.

So for all its usual destructiveness, I found a fear that can be a starting point for better things, Fear can be a stepping stone to prudence & to a decent respect for others, It can point the path to justice as well as to hate, And the more I have have of respect & justice ,the more I shall begin to find love which can suffer much but can be freely given, So fear not always be destructive, because the lessons of its consequences can lead us to positive values .

An you all have a good day .

[ssd858]

Re: Newbies Nest

Great post Wildflowers!

PanhandleKim - it shows strength that you came here a fessed up and are moving on. Every day afree is an accomplishment! Try not to think of it as completely starting over. The day 1 thing can feel daunting. I am reading a great book that you might like: The Naked Mind by Annie Grace. She expands on Allen Carr's concepts and it is really well written.

Have a great sober day to all!

[KENSHO]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good morning! I had very vivid dreams sleeping in this am, but not drinking ones! Something about my step brother and a bath tub that wa broken ?!? We are headed up to a friend's VRBO in the woods. It's near a Buddhist center and I'm hoping to hike to the stupa. I feel pressure for the work I can't get done while up there, but that will fade and I hope to enjoy family time. That's the thing about having a home office - the work is always there staring at you! It will be good to get away!

Pan, I'm glad you are here and posting. It will click for you if you dont give up!!

Have a strong and beautiful day lovely people!

[PanhandleKim]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good Afternoon Everyone-

Wildflowers- thank you so much for another beautiful and inspiring post. I want you to know how much your advice, ideas and personal guidance means to me. To answer a few of your questions, no this isn't my first quit. Over the years, I have half-heartedly tried to quit many, many times. A handful of times, I've really taken my efforts toward sobriety seriously and quit for a few weeks at a time. My husband doesn't drink and he is very support of any effort I make to abstain. Because he isn't a problem drinker, it's a little difficult for him to understand why I can't just have a couple of glasses and be done with it. However, he knows that it's impossible for me to do that and that alcohol has a different effect on me than it does on most people. I have tried a few F2F meetings. Unfortunately, the first meeting I attended I knew two people there right off. The lack of anonymity was very distressing to me and continued to be a distraction during subsequent meetings that I attended. That's why I think a forum, such as this one, is a much better avenue for me. WF, I really need God too, and I feel so much closer to Him when I'm sober. I've just GOT to learn to tolerate uncomfortable emotions/situations. Thank you again for all of your advice and taking time to write to me personally. These posts are like food for my soul right now...

LS- I hope your son is better. Its stressful having sick little ones. My family and I are going to visit Belfast in June. Maybe you can suggest some places for us to visit while we're there.

NS, ssd858, Ava- thank you for the advice. ss858 - I will for sure check on the book.

Thanks to everyone here for your commitment to each other and to keeping yourselves healthy through living AF. I'm on day 3 and moving forward..

Take care -
Kim

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good evening Nesters,

I hope everyone had a decent AF Thursday!

Not really looking forward to the 2 1/2 inches of rain predicted for tomorrow but it is better than snow I guess, ha ha!
My flock of chickens will muddy & stinky for the next few days, oh well.

Kensho, I think a lot of us feel extra pressure as the seasons change. I know I have trouble sleeping decently which leads to mood swings which could lead to not smart thinking
I know this about myself & can recognize the pattern. One thing I know for sure is that AL will not make me feel any better, only a thousand times worse. The best tool in the Toolbox is using distraction during these times. Get your thoughts going on a completely different path & you'll never be sorry

Too cold & wet outside for gardening activities so I think tomorrow will be a crafty/cooking/baking kind of day, yay!
Wishing everyone a safe & comfy night in the nest!

Lav

[Byrdlady]

Re: Newbies Nest

Evening, Nesters. Had a very good day today, things look promising for some business, so Im happy about that. Long drive home so Im tuckered out.
Pan, the discomfort of a craving is temporary and will always pass, but the guilt, shame, and remorse of drinking last forever. We have used up every free pass we were given as far as drinking goes. No thanks, I already drank my share. There is nothing like the feeling and confidence that being sober gives us. Hang in with us, you are doing just fine!
So glad to be home, Im about to fall asleep right here......zzzzzzzzzz, Byrdie

[Pavati]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi,

I'm still here, of course not drinking but sheesh, I've been busy. Houseguests 6 of the last 7 nights (in a SMALL place). Super great time with great friends, but I am pooped, and didn't have time to check in here very easily. I have NO desire to drink and am so happy to have had all of this chaos around me but feeling very calm inside.

Pan - I had that same feeling about the F2F meeting, but I was wondering the other day why I did. After all, anyone you see in that meeting would be there for the same reason. Still, I get it.

I didn't read back, but I see that Ava's son is four years off Ice. Congratulations!

I am grateful that you are all here for me when I need, and I'll try to come more often.

Happy sober Thursday!

Pav

[mario]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good morning nesters ,

Its Friday and a beautiful sunny day here in Portugal , life is good for me, it has its ups & downs but I am dealing with my problems in a clear & mature way nowadays, I try to respond instead of react, Reading all the posts here on MWO it reminds me of the cunning baffling & powerful nature of our/my addiction.

Have a great day all .

[Lost Soul]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi all,
Hope everyone is well tonight?
Everything & everyone is returning to normality & wellness (thankyou for the well wishes x) albeit a bit tired, but getting there
ABC, everything you are doing is enough :hug: I feel the same sometimes that I want to help everyone, right now - because it's so good! But by helping yourself first & being here, it's reaching out to every potential new person & just might help them make to see both terrifying & brave first steps x
Doing awesome quit winning & beautiful dog in your avatar.
Nursie - I am so pleased your oncologist appt went well, hope your friends treatment is going well too x
SSD, come paint mine, lol I'm rubbish either way & mine needs it?
Pan - would love to suggest places but there's so many! What are you after? If you can get a night without the kids, I'd visit James Street South or the Odyssey W5 is good for family (adults only if you have a geeky interest in science!) I think NS & Pav suggest, only reply to what suits & helps you (No need for more pressure than we need). I would love to be like Lav & Byrdie among others & post like they do - but I'm a selfish b**** & the best of me & my sobriety is for my kids now x
WF, thankyou :hug: so beneficial to so many your post, if you stay around in these parts x
Kensho, I'm so curious about your spa day, glad you enjoyed it! What did you get?
Pav, I'm SO pleased you popped in :heartbeat: lots of chaos sounds like my life (Alot haha!) Good to hear you managing unscathed - gives me hope x
Mario I hope you have more settled times in work soon though glad you weather the changes in the meantime so well x

Wishing all a safe & sober Friday
LS

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good evening Nesters,

Sounds like everyone is doing pretty well & that's great!
I have a few things that I regret but choosing to kick AL out of my life is not one of them. Seems like such a daunting task in the beginning but it gets easier as you go along. The next thing you know you are months & years down the AF road wondering why it took you so long to take the plunge, really.

Wishing everyone a safe & cozy night in the nest. Very, very damp here & chilly here, the weather folks were right this time!

Lav

[Byrdlady]

Re: Newbies Nest

A LONG day, Im just finishing and its almost 8:30pm. There is much more to do, it will have to wait. My brain is french fried.
Glad its Friday. Stay strong everyone. It is worth it. Even sober people have bad days sometimes. Hugs to all. Byrdie

[ADP]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi all,
Am wide awake and doing some reading to tire my eyes for a couple more hours sleep.
As usual getting encouragement and picking up tips to keep AF. Just a few more hours away from 10 weeks AF in my part of the nest and sooo happy about that.
However, I see a problem arising as today I booked my trip home in September for my belated 50th and that will really test the quit, (boy, planning that far ahead and believing I will still be AF is a breakthrough) :-) I'm telling all there that the new diet I'm on disallows alcohol, but I know I'm going to feel the preasure when I get there. Any advice always welcome.
I take each day as it comes and try to smile as much as possible. The doctor allowed me to get back to my gym and am killing it right now yay!!!! So if all goes to plan, I'll be fit at 50!!??!!

Right, eyes now tired, I can sleep again. lol!

Thank you all for honesty, encouragement for each other and for never stopping trying to stay clear of AL.

Axxx

[mario]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good morning nesters , Hello to all above , I on my phone so its hard enough to be typing :-)


Years ago when I was in the daily battles with this addiction , I thought conditions drove me to drink & drugs,& when I tried to correct those conditions I found I couldent do so to my entire satisfaction , my drinking went out of hand & my drinking just got worse, It never occurred to me that I needed to change myself to get on the right path, Glad I on it now

Have a good day folks :-)

[mario]

Re: Newbies Nest

ADP, Try not to be worrying or planning for September, not now, Deal with it when its more on the horizon, Hopefully by then with the amount of clean time & the learning you have in you by then will guide you & help you through it, As its your birthday you want to be able to enjoy it & not fret or stress through it, It will work out.