Newbies Nest

[mario]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good morning nesters & happy Easter to all of you.

Yesterday the weather was scorching, Today its cloudy & only a 22c , Even the weather has to change...

Welcome Scots & Neo .

Selfishness -self-centredness ,

That we think is the root of our troubles, Driven by a hundred forms of fear, self delusion, self-seeking & self pity, We step on the toes of other folks & they retaliate ,Sometimes they hurt us, seemingly without provocation , but we invariable find that sometime in the past we have made decision's based on self which later placed us in a position to be hurt.

So , our troubles, we think, are basically of our own making,

They arise out of ourselves & us addicts are an extreme example of self will run riot, though we usually don't see it like that. Above everything, we alcoholics must be rid of this selfishness, We must or it will kill us.

Have a great sober & clean day folks.

[Neo]

Re: Newbies Nest

Getting ready for tomorrows quit date which I should of set for today. Beer in fridge but wasn't really interested and know it has to be gone. Wanted to align cig quit up and didn't smoke much at all today or should I say got sick of it. Drank heaps of water this afternoon

[tonyniceday]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi Guys,
Getting ready for my Day 1 again after a relapse. Not trying to bash myself up about it. Have set the date for Tuesday Cigs and Beer again .

Neo, This may be controversial but I am wondering, from your previous quits, whether you are asking too much of yourself? Cigs and Beer at the same time??

You've attempted this a number of times and have some good AF and NF periods behind you but I know for sure that, for me, quitting AL was the most important thing. I still smoke and one of the things that helps me with my AL quit is to be able to go outside at work or at home and have a cigarette when the AL pangs or cravings come along.

I do want to quit the cigs as well at some point but not right now as it is, rightly or wrongly, part of my AF toolbox to be able to have a cigarette when I want a glass of wine!!!

Have you ever attempted one without the other? I think it might be worth a try....

[Neo]

Re: Newbies Nest

My problem at the moment is I had a dental implant and fortunately started smoking after it was healed but regretted doing so however crown hasn't been fitted. Once it is, and is exposed again to the smoke, I may lose the implant so that is the question I need to ask myself and will be getting my teeth well cleaned and touched up to match the crown. Once this is done, I should keep of the cigs . I know within 3 days ,I smell better, eat better and having a good reminder last night at 3am in morning why I need to keep off AL .Luckily the Val calmed me down

I can guarantee you will feel heaps better on Day 4 of a nicotine quit .Getting there is just a little agonising and is easier said than done but has been worth it for me each quit as I focused on eating whenever I had an urge for AL or Cig

[Pavati]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good Morning, Nest:

Byrdie, what an ordeal. Sometimes I take being in those situations like a cultural exploration. I am with some group that I am observing from the outside. And then I always feel so wonderful when I get home, sober, and relax into my bed with no regret. Glad your boss didn't have to call you a drunkard, too, and glad you survived.

Neo - can you tip those beers out now? Why wait until you drink them? I found out with diets that setting dates just enabled me to eat MORE with the promise to myself that it would all stop...next Tuesday??? Anyway - glad you came back and I hope you use us for support.

SL - Enjoy the coast. Beach therapy is THE BEST. I am impressed with your running - it must feel great to see the progress as your runs get longer and longer.

Happy SOBER Sunday, everyone.

Pav

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good evening Nesters,

I hope everyone celebrating Easter had a nice day!
I had no kids or grandkids here today - unusual but that's the way it was
In exchange for company & spending hours too many hours in the kitchen I got a chance to play outside & start cleaning up the garden beds a bit.

Wishing everyone a safe & comfy night in the nest! Whether this was your first AF holiday or not, good job everyone

Lav

[wagmor]

Re: Newbies Nest

SL -congrats on your progress with running! I wish I could still run but my knees and back just can't take it after too many injuries. Sure do miss it though - it was always my sort of combo meditation and therapy. Hope you enjoy the beach as well. What a great little escape for yourself!

Pav - loved your comment about cultural exploration. I've done something similar with groups around other behaviors, but never thought to do it around drinking. Will have to give that a try! It can be fascinating to watch behaviors, norms, communication, roles, etc from that perspective.

Lav - glad you got a chance (and cooperative weather) to play outside in the dirt and tend your gardens.


In WagLand, tomorrow starts my 2nd week back to work after my accident. Truth be told, last week kicked me in the butt! The good news is that I never once thought I needed a drink to unwind or to reward myself or any of the usual excuses. I'm still having a lot of pain, but am excited about a few new projects and clients I'll be working with and that gives me some extra energy. I also started making some plans for summer vacation. My sister and brother-in-law will be coming to stay with us in Aug. Last year they came in early July, just a week or two before I started this final quit. So last visit I spent half their visit drinking with them. I'm excited that this year I'll have a full year AF under my belt before they arrive. I'm not worried about it really - my B-I-L doesn't really drink anyway, and we all have so much fun together I doubt they'll even notice except they'll probably be able to tell how much healthier I am this year. I know I'm still almost 100 days from my one-year mark, but I'm starting to get excited about it.

[Neo]

Re: Newbies Nest

All Beers gone. 11 cigs left .Quit week starts.

[mario]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good morning nesters,

Good luck Neo & I would take Tony opinion into consideration.

No matter what we do, Someone is going to have something negative to say,

If we allow negative people to have an impact on something good that we are doing we will never finish the things we start.

There comes a time when we have to brush of all those people who comment negatively about our life's, actions or feelings, Those people no matter who they are ,are not happy.

I must remember that all us here & other fellowships we attend are at a different place in there process, They will grow at there speed not mine or yours.

Its easy to reach out & give advise, the hard part is remembering to do so & remember where other folks are at with there own process.

Have a good safe day folks.

[Neo]

Re: Newbies Nest

Thanks Mario. Not beating myself up about cigs atm . Main thing is AL this week which is my focus

[tonyniceday]

Re: Newbies Nest

Thanks Mario. Not beating myself up about cigs atm . Main thing is AL this week which is my focus

That's good to hear Neo - I really think you are doing the right thing for now...Good luck we're with you on this, all the way!

For what it is worth, at one time I went to my Doctor to get a repeat prescription and we talked about my AF time and he asked me "are you still smoking?" I said "Come on, Dr, one addiction at a time!" He laughed, and agreed, and said he was "only asking"!!

[KENSHO]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi Peeps! Happy Monday!!

Lovely spring day here and I am having to hold myself back from buying flowers for my deck. If I buy them too early, inevitably hail or frost come and I am lugging in 27 pots. It’s our Mother’s Day tradition to wake up early (6am) and plant flowers with my kids. SO I’ll force myself to wait!

Thank you, thank you for the thoughts on the “funk” phase. The “in between”. I realized this weekend that I am craving short term pleasure. I’ve been feeling burnt out of my job and other things, and don’t have that long term vision in place. When I was fighting to make a name for myself in the design industry, I had that to look forward to. When I was learning to eat better, I had that result in mind. And when I was quitting alcohol, I had a vision of my current self in mind. I am not a drinker (Thanks Cowboy for reminding me that it has been 8 months!!!), I have some security in my career, and I have established a new way of eating. SO, I think it’s time to re-evaluate what I want. If I can define what rewards will be at the end of my goals, I think I will feel more motivated to wait for the end result. It really is the “in-between”, and thanks again for your posts PAV and NS.

I did buy this thing called the “self journal”. It’s supposed to help me define my goals and steadily work toward them. I like the idea of journaling again!

Most of all, I believe you when you when you say it’s better not drinking - at 1 yr, 2 yrs, 3 yrs +. I don’t feel it every day, but I believe you.

Hugs everyone!

[Struggles 106]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi all

I am back, after a disastrous lapse...and I don't think I need to go into how bad I feel.
I want to write more but I'm just too shaky at the moment.

Ann

[Quit wining]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hey Struggles, keep close to the nest, you're among friends who have all experienced what you're going through.

Check out the Tool Kit if you haven't already. Byrdlady (Byrdie) has a link to the Tool Kit in her postings.

And don't hesitate to lean on your fellow Nesters.

QW

[Hypernova]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hey everyone. Have wanted to jump on and post here but just haven't. Don't know why but I would like to be more active here as I know this will help going forward. I usually get to a point and then think o.k. a couple won't hurt. I know where this will lead and now w/today being day 78 I am beginning to feel the results of all the work I have put in to remaining AF. I do have much to say but I will leave that for another day. Thankful for this oasis away from the craziness of the 'world'

Hi Struggles. Just would like to say if you want to be AF you can be. Try not and look at where you've been although never forget. Look at where you are and what kind of life you want for yourself. It is definitely difficult initially as you know. Hang tight and resist alcohol. You /all of us deserve to have a better life than AL can offer. Take advantage of all the wonderful strength offered here and remember the insidious nature of the Beast. I look forward to reading of your progress. Be patient w/yourself and let the AF days roll. Take care, all the best to you, Hyper.