Newbies Nest

[lifechange]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi Nesters,

Happy Birthday, Nar! I hope you have a nice day celebrating..

A bunch of super posts to read before going to bed. For me it's been a day of walking, just taking steps, one foot in front of the other. I'm moving in slow motion at the moment, very aware of my body and therefore of everything around me as well. I'm finding it a luxury to have the time to sit on a bench in the park in the sunshine if I want to while on my way home from shopping. I've got to remember to do that more often in my normal life. It's what I strive to do.. living in the moment. But it's difficult to find the balance.. and I forget my priorities.

I know I haven't ever given sobriety enough time to change my brain.. Sometimes I feel like my way of thinking about alcohol has changed, I feel strong, have a great plan, check in here each and every day, don't doubt whether or not I can do it.. and then something happens and I change my mind. I make the decision, surely the thoughts must enter my mind ahead of time, maybe after reading something in a book or seeing drinking romanticised in a film, and then set myself up for failure. By not coming here, by pushing everything I KNOW to the back of my mind, by convincing myself either that I can just have a couple of drinks today and then start again tomorrow or by throwing it all out the window with thoughts of normal drinking.. I'm not sure what I'll do differently this time. I know my life is better without alcohol. I have a lot of things I like to do and friends I like to spend time with. I've got a great job and kids I love. There are still a couple of situations that I still seem to obsess over that I'm trying keep in perspective.. and it is getting easier to let the thoughts go when they come into my mind.

anyway, I'm very happy to be going to bed sober and look forward, once again, to a good night's sleep!
I hope you're all enjoying your day..
see you tomorrow..xx

[Susie45]

Re: Newbies Nest

I am happy to be going to bed sober tonight too. Nighty night.

[Matt M.]

Re: Newbies Nest

In my opinion, once the physical dependence is gone, all that is left is to change our thoughts about alcohol -- because it is only whatever we think it is. After romanticizing it for years and then getting to the point of thinking it necessary for survival, that change might take some time. Some people, like ThreeTimesACharm have a eureka moment - in an instant his thoughts about alcohol changed so his feelings about it changed, leading to his behavior changing. For most of us, it takes more work. That is why there's all the encouragement to read and post to change our thinking. And our thoughts literally change our brains. That is why it is such a good idea for Nar to get back here and participate when she noticed that those unwanted thoughts of drinking were getting some traction. It's why some of us who feel pretty secure in our AF ways still read and check in. It's a little "tune-up", reminding us which thoughts we should pay attention to - the ones that make us feel good.

I see the wine around me now and marvel at all the fuss. I no longer think about it in the same way as do the people who can spend 20 minutes discussing the relative merits of the various offerings before they even order. The alcohol is just a fluid -- we give or take away its power with our thought

Great read NS!
When I started trying to quit this is one of the things that I would hear people say and was convinced I would never be able to get. The thought of ever seeing alcohol as a poison or something that I would be able to have fun without was inconceivable and incomprehensible. It has happened and I am so very grateful for it. My entire thought process has changed concerning al.
However- I am reminded (by a current friend of mine that just went back out after 11 years) that I must not let my guard down, because the alcoholic part of my brain, can be "cunning" and easily convince me that since I'm so "over it" then what the hell I could likely get away with having a few? Not!
Thanks for sharing!

Hi everyone! :heartbeat:

[narilly]

Re: Newbies Nest

Thank you NS! That was an excellent post. You have a way with words, that is for sure.

Well, I am here for my tune up and it is working. Although I think I may stick around here for a while until I feel a lot stronger in my quit.
Matt- what happened with your friend who started drinking after 11 years? That is so scary to me. Did he go on a total rampage, getting drunk every night sort of thing or was he able to quit again?
Ugh- AL sucks!

Life, Susie- so nice to go to bed sober. Sweet dreams

xo
Narilly

[Byrdlady]

Re: Newbies Nest

Happy Birthday, Narilly! Hope it is the best! :balloons:
Matt, great to see you! None if us is immune to relapse so my butt stays glued in here!
Mr V, glad to see you posting with...verve! Keep up the great work!
NS, GREAT post, as always! Byrdie

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good evening Nesters!

Nar, HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU
I am glad you decided to come back for a 'refresher' on why our sobriety is so important.

Matt, that's sad about your friend. I hope he gets himself back together vey soon. Good to see you by the way

LC, you have this time to heal & reinvent yourself as well. That's awesome, wishing you the very best.

Hi there NS, Susie, Kensho & everyone.
Wishing a safe & comfy night in the nest for all.

Lav

[PanhandleKim]

Re: Newbies Nest

It's been a good day here - no chaos at work, lunch with my daughter and spent evening with my husband and son just gardening and doing common, normal things without a glass in my hand. I'm really tired and it's the "good" kind of tired- not the kind where I stumble into bed and fall into that black, restless sleep that never leaves me feeling rested. Susie, so glad we're both going to bed sober. I'm glad the weekend is behind us.

So many good posts tonight - thanks to everyone for sharing.

Night to all-
Kim

[mario]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good morning nesters.

Well done to everyone who are making progress in there personnel battles not forgetting those out there who are lurking & for one reason or another don't post. You are all more than welcome & there is nothing you have done or said that hasn't been done or said before, nothing, Drop in here & say hello we can all relate & it might help you in taking that first step on the road to a better life, I know by coming here it worked for me.

Have a good day folks, stay safe.

[lifechange]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good Morning, Nesters..
and I have to say it is! Even though it's raining and freezing cold..good reason to stay cozied up inside..

So today my plan is the same as yesterday (it worked quite well).. I won't drink no matter what and no matter who. I'll continue to alter my thought process, to come here for support, to do positive things to support the health of body and mind...with food and drinks I put into my body, with what I read, with the people I choose to spend time with.
One foot in front of the other. I know for a fact I can do it for a day!

Wishing everyone a nice Tuesday..:hug:

[Susie45]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good morning nesters - always feels good to wake up after a sober sleep. I like [MENTION=15430]lifechange[/MENTION] 's plan. I will do the same. Have a good day everyone!

[Susie45]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good morning nesters.

Well done to everyone who are making progress in there personnel battles not forgetting those out there who are lurking & for one reason or another don't post. You are all more than welcome & there is nothing you have done or said that hasn't been done or said before, nothing, Drop in here & say hello we can all relate & it might help you in taking that first step on the road to a better life, I know by coming here it worked for me.


Have a good day folks, stay safe.

Such a nice supportive post Mario

[Mr Vervill]

Re: Newbies Nest

Morning all, another sunny day here. The sun does lift my spirits.
I got the bike ride in yesterday, the first of the year, 16 miles, felt like 50, Lol. Going to try and get another one in today.
I sure felt like a beer after I got back from my ride, but took the dog out for a long walk instead, that did the trick, getting through the witching hour. and I spent some chat time with neighbors. I also had to tell my self, what good is all that exercise, if you're just going to negate it with AL.
Wishing everyone a good one,
Mr. V

[wagmor]

Re: Newbies Nest

Mr V - congrats on getting your first ride in, and then even more for walking your dog instead of having a beer afterwards! I'm an avid cyclist myself and have been sidelined since my Feb car accident. Just did my first "real" ride last weekend - probably only around 10-12 miles, but didn't want to push my neck, back, or wrist too much and have any of them scream at me the day after. Hope you get many more turns of the cranks this coming week!

Matt - good to see you. Your post is a great reminder of how we can't ever rest easy with our quits.

LC - your plan for the day sounds solid - not drinking no matter what and no matter who. Taking time to sit on a park bench and enjoy the sunshine sounds like a great approach to life. Thanks for the reminder to slow down a bit, even if just for several minutes every day.

NS - You sure have come a long way since that conference! Yes, changing our thoughts around al is an essential piece of this process - one we cannot forget or skip over. And I agree with you - you aren't boring at all!

Great AF days/eves to you all!

[Hypernova]

Re: Newbies Nest

The sun does lift my spirits.
I got the bike ride in yesterday, the first of the year, 16 miles, felt like 50, Lol. Going to try and get another one in today.
I sure felt like a beer after I got back from my ride, but took the dog out for a long walk instead
Mr. V

Well another reason to like the site and the people on it. We have more in common than I knew. Three of my Favorite things Mr. V, bike riding, walking my dog and sunshine streaming down. Nothing I know of makes me feel more free & alive than hitting the road on my bike. There is also nothing more centering and calming than taking my pup for a walk in the park. Third what could feel better than the warm glow you get from sunshine? Also I would add that a dip in the ocean is one of the more beautiful things I love. There!! Four incredible reasons to stay sober. All of these are better enjoyed with a clean sober mind and body. I feel good just thinking of these things even though it is chilly and cloudy today. Tomorrow is another day but today I am totally happy to be Free of Alcohol. All the best to everyone!!

[wagmor]

Re: Newbies Nest

Well another reason to like the site and the people on it. We have more in common than I knew. Three of my Favorite things Mr. V, bike riding, walking my dog and sunshine streaming down. Nothing I know of makes me feel more free & alive than hitting the road on my bike. There is also nothing more centering and calming than taking my pup for a walk in the park. Third what could feel better than the warm glow you get from sunshine? Also I would add that a dip in the ocean is one of the more beautiful things I love. There!! Four incredible reasons to stay sober. All of these are better enjoyed with a clean sober mind and body. I feel good just thinking of these things even though it is chilly and cloudy today. Tomorrow is another day but today I am totally happy to be Free of Alcohol. All the best to everyone!!

I'm with you on all of these Hypernova - the first 3 in particular are at the top of my list. Love the ocean as well but I have easier access to mountains so tend to head there more often. Yes, there are MANY good reasons to stay AF!!!