Newbies Nest

[Guitarista]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi Nesters,

Byrdy and all, Geez, so sorry to hear that Lil bits' situation has not improved. Count me in for a contribution to a great lady.

Congratulations on 1 whole year Wags! You bewdy!

Gr8 work Yellow.

43 days sober today and loving it. Take it easy out there.

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good evening Nesters,

Sitting here & happy to be having a big thunder storm. Maybe things will finally cool off a bit, ha ha!

Great to see everyone & wishing a safe night in the nest for all

Lav

[NoraC]

Re: Newbies Nest

Wags - CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!!!

[Hypernova]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hello everyone. Find it hard to believe that I would be typing the fact that I had one beer each nite for 3 nites. Yes Sat., Sun. & Mon. nite. I guess the stress and all the added work of trying to be a caregiver for an elderly parent finally took its toll on me. I thought I would be alright but was not really ready to deal with the tremendous stress over the last several weeks and I caved and had a beer. I worked so hard over the last almost 6 mos. & now this. I am upset with myself but in hindsight I can see that I was not prepared to take care of myself as well once I plunged into this. Just moving back here was so very stressful that nothing I would do would be surprising to me. Now that I am here and have been getting things in order and am becoming more comfortable in my ability to handle this I hope I can find the desire to be AF again. I just simply would rather not drink. I am tired & not thinking straight. So I will leave it at that. I will check in and read and try and post now that I have finally gotten some help during the day. I wish everyone the best and hope to be among the AF soon. Thanks for listening......Hyper

[lifechange]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good Morning, Nesters,

Hi Hypernova.. being quite new into my LAFQ, I don't feel like I have much/many advice/helpful words to give. But I know the stress you've been under from what you've written and I think it's great that you're coming back here so soon and not letting the drinking get too out of control.. Once we're at this point, we KNOW that our lives are so much better, regardless of the hard balls (for lack of a better word. my words are failing me atm) that might be thrown our way, without alcohol.. and I hope you'll just jump right back into sobriety. I'm happy to hear you've found some help and are settling in. Big hugs and strength to you..:hug:

Yello, way to go on 3 days! Today will be 4. It's great to hear your positive take on all of this.. You're inspiring me to see this as more of a challenge instead of a battle.. though sometimes I feel I have to beat the voice into the ground. Next time it comes I'm going to try and turn it around.. let's see!

So, my friend Andre has stopped coming by in the evenings, though I know he's nearby because the girls have seen him in front of the school in his spot. I've been tempted to say something to him, but I haven't, because it seems he is making the decision to drink and isn't coming here for that reason. He comes for half an hour or so in the morning but doesn't eat anything and doesn't say much.. I might have offended him by what I said about his drinking.. and I feel a bit bad, but on the other hand, I really can't take care of someone who isn't taking care, at least a little bit, of himself. I offered to go with him this week to the Red-Cross type organisation where he has a caretaker who is supposed to be helping him to find a flat.. but Andre doesn't seem to have been in touch with him the past week. So, very sad and a stark reminder of what happens when someone drinks..he's really a different person than he was the first 2 weeks.. and there's nothing I can do to stop him. I'm fairly certain at this point that alcohol was a large, if not THE, reason he's in the situation he's in.

Otherwise, everything is pretty good here. I have one more week of work and then 2 weeks off.. one of which I think I'll have all on my own. Which is just what the doctor ordered!:happy2:

I hope everyone is doing well.. Stop in and say hello, let us know what you're up to, if you're just flying by!!! I'd love to have some more action in this Nest!

Has anyone heard from Kensho? J-vo? They are 2 of several ladies I really miss!

See you all later, xx

[YelloBello]

Re: Newbies Nest

Morning all

On the train going to work but taking your advice lifechange and saying a quick hello.

Remember that all these emotions and voices are only thoughts.

You are the source and the observer of your thoughts.

Hope that makes it easier.

Looking forward to my day, will do 2.5k jog this evening then work on my new business.

Have a wonderful day nesters!

Have a great day all.

[available]

Re: Newbies Nest

evening nesters

i really didnt think the village idiots i work with could get much worse but they seem to never fail to suprise me with their stupidity which in turn creates more work for me and them saying "i thought i told you". I was furious today but thankfully i could vent and get it out of my system, well not really but my blood pressure is not at boiling point. the lovely man visited for coffee and bought flowers which i definitely appreciated and made the afternoon bearable.

Hyper, any drink for us alkies is not good. Just one a night will never be enough as time goes on. stress was a huge trigger for me but at the end of the day i learnt i had to ask for help which you have done. Being accountable each and every day is also a definite in keeping my brain in its non drinking mode and time. Be pissed off with yourself but learn that this glitch is not you. dont get a case of the f#ck its and if you are not coping then reach out. Even if you get little to no help it makes the world of difference to get it out in the open. Learn to say no and prioritise, your sobriety is number 1, you are number 1, if you dont function to your fullest then nothing else will. Try and find time for you, even if it is being on here for 10mins. You can be sober, you have proved it and you are worth it. dont ever forget that. sending you hugs.

LC at the end of the day Andre is not your problem. As you know it is his choice to drink as it is yours. Hopefully he knows that you will be there in some way for him when he is ready to accept the help offered and if not there is nothing you can do.

Well i am now off to enjoy a cup of tea and relax.

Take care x

[Pavati]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi, Nest:

Learn to say no and prioritise, your sobriety is number 1, you are number 1, if you dont function to your fullest then nothing else will. Try and find time for you, even if it is being on here for 10mins. You can be sober, you have proved it and you are worth it. dont ever forget that. sending you hugs.

More pearls from Ava. Really, that's the key - if you don't function to your fullest then nothing will. One thing that helped me get out of the habit of going to alcohol in times of extreme stress is the "play it to the end" strategy. NEVER did alcohol actually relieve stress in the long run - only added to it. I was in an extremely stressful work situation last year - adrenaline flowing all day. I went out with some normal colleagues and they had martinis. I REALLY wanted a martini because I know how quickly that drug works to relieve that feeling of anxiety and stress. But I took some planned deep breaths and remembered that last day I was drinking - how awful I felt, and how much I knew I could never deal with that work situation feeling like that. The thoughts went away, i was able to bring myself down without alcohol, and a new sober muscle was flexed.

Hyper - if you read about relapse (try that Relapse in Retrospect that someone bumped up), you will see that even when you posted here you were on your way to drinking. Please take good care of yourself during this very stressful period. Reach out if you need to and ask for help - you have done that before and we would love to be here for you. Excellent on you for reaching out and coming back right away. Your post sounds like you are planning on continuing drinking? Can you set yourself up so that you don't have alcohol at home this evening? Buy your favorite non alcoholic drink, lots of food, call a friend. You are worth it! Try reading your first few posts when you came here - try remembering how great you feel after 6 months without. We're with you!

Way to go, Yello! Sorry, LC. Stay cool, Lav. Keep it up, G. Hello to everyone else (LC - Kensho pops in from time to time - I personally haven't heard from J-Vo). Hi to everyone else...


Pav

[Mr Vervill]

Re: Newbies Nest

First, a big shout-out to Wags! ONE YEAR! That's Huge! Well done!
I, too am so sorry to hear about Lilbit. Such a wonderful woman, so funny too. Sending strength her way.

I have some bad news to report, but I think it's important here, because we always need to keep our guard up against AL. My niece, who suffers from AL problems as well, fell off the wagon, hard. She had been sober for nearly seven years, and started drinking again. I don't know all the details, because I don't live anywhere near her, but one night she left the house and was found the next morning in a park, dirty, scratched up, and missing clothing. Thankfully she was not raped, but nobody knows what happened, not even her. Scary stuff. She's checked her self into rehab, and we're all wishing the best for her. Scary stuff. I should note she's never done anything like this before, more reason to stay vigilant!

[NoSugar]

Re: Newbies Nest

I had one beer each nite for 3 nites. Yes Sat., Sun. & Mon. nite.

You know, [MENTION=11645]Hypernova[/MENTION], only on an addiction forum would this sound like a problem. But in fact, it might be a worse problem than if you'd drunk until you blacked out 3 nights in row. I'm pretty sure I would take it as evidence that I could be a "normal drinker" and I'd be tempted to give that a try, especially in such stressful conditions as you're in now.

Your coming back here right away that you haven't been fooled :thumbsups:! The odds of someone with an alcohol addiction being able to maintain that very moderate intake over the long run are pretty short. The neural pathways of addiction get activated, the cravings return, and then all bets are off.

I hope you do something else this evening to unwind. Perhaps an activity that you find soothing or invigorating - whichever sounds good. I'll be thinking of you, NS

[lifechange]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi Friends,
it's the end of the day here and I'm heading to bed.
it was a pretty uneventful day..
Let's see what tomorrow brings.

Mr. V, I'm very sorry to hear about your niece. She must be so scared.. I hope she'll find some good help.:hug:

Wishing you all a nice evening/morning.. Hypernova, let us know how you are.
xx

[Overit-still]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hey all! Just checking in. Sober. Trying to read back on some posts. I'm heart broken about Lil' Bit. Not sure what else I've missed. I've said it before but it's just too hard to hang here and hear about drinking ALL THE TIME! It's funny because that is what this site is about. It just helps me to train my brain in another direction and look forward and do and think about other things. I respect everyone who is here and everyone who has stayed here to help all of us. I just thought I should do a fly by.

Have a great AF day.

[Byrdlady]

Re: Newbies Nest

First, a big shout-out to Wags! ONE YEAR! That's Huge! Well done!
I, too am so sorry to hear about Lilbit. Such a wonderful woman, so funny too. Sending strength her way.

I have some bad news to report, but I think it's important here, because we always need to keep our guard up against AL. My niece, who suffers from AL problems as well, fell off the wagon, hard. She had been sober for nearly seven years, and started drinking again. I don't know all the details, because I don't live anywhere near her, but one night she left the house and was found the next morning in a park, dirty, scratched up, and missing clothing. Thankfully she was not raped, but nobody knows what happened, not even her. Scary stuff. She's checked her self into rehab, and we're all wishing the best for her. Scary stuff. I should note she's never done anything like this before, more reason to stay vigilant!

Mr. V!
Notes like this scare the white off my teeth. Staying sober takes support, that's why Im still here! Thank you for the reminder! Hugs to all, Byrdie

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good evening Nesters,

Hypernova, I sure hope you can break this new habit asap. We all know from prior experience that dream of moderate drinking is nearly impossible to maintain - at least it was for me. Glad to hear you have some help with your care giving. Being a nurse & nursing my parents, in-laws & various other relatives created a huge amount of stress for me. I feel for you!

Mr V, I am sorry about your niece, that's very sad & scary. I wonder how much depression/unresolved stuff was involved in her fall off the wagon. Depression & loneliness are huge triggers. I hope her rehab goes well.

Overit, good to see you.

Ava, ignore the village idiots, ha ha. Not letting them get under your skin is vital self-care

Hi Pav, LC, Byrdie, NS, Yello & everyone.
Wishing a safe night in the nest for all!

Lav

[Choices]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi, Everyone! I started to try and catch up but stopped and decided to post before I got too tired. I am 10 days AF and feel better. I haven't been thinking about drinking as I need to study way too much to barely keep up. I did have a few stressful and emotional hicups in my week that unless I had decided I wasn't going to drink a head of time I more then likely may have just escaped in some alcohol, woke up and felt icky. But I didn't! Yay!

I'm definitely in for the 30 days as I am almost half way there. I didn't say in the last post, but I'm studying to become a naturopath. I'm just starting my second semester. One of the great things that has been offered to me through this program is free councling, and I'm finding that really beneficial. My biggest trigger for binge drinking, is emotional stress. Talking with the counclor seems to be helping me quite a bit.

Also, I get to be a ginny pig for a third year naturopath student, so she helps me too and prescribed me an herbal tonic that really helps with stress. It is also really inspiring to be around people interested in health, however I'm finding the program really hard, it almost feels like I am not cut out for it, but I'm sticking with it. Because I love what I'm learning so much and I really just don't see myself giving up.

I got a botany test result yesterday and I failed it. It's the first time I have ever failed a test. Right when I saw the result online, I heard water running and when I went into our garage... I saw the whole floor was flooded... and the water was still running like a shower. I had to call the landlord.. he came really quickly (he is great) BUT.. he mentioned he needed to raise the rent.. and after the plummer came.. it was figured out that the leak was a hose on OUR washing mashine.. so we need to pay, during this time my nanny that I just hired was coming over so I could show her how to bring my daughter to ballet.... Anyway... long story full of chaos... and topped of with my husband saying we need to talk about money next week with our credit cards going to uncomfortable limits.... At the end of the day, I am so proud of myself, because I didn't drink I didn't wake up feeling yucky and I dealth with all the uncomfortable failure of my test, the pain in the butt of the washing mashine, and the truth about our finantial issue at the moment with out checking out by the TV with a bottle of wine. It crossed my mind a few times, but I also didn't feel like I was going to explode, so it was easier to push the thought out of my mind. It was new feeling like I wasn't going to explode.. I'm grateful for that. Thanks for listening to my babble! It helped to type it out.