Newbies Nest

[Londoner]

Re: Newbies Nest

Right, it's in me. My first dosage of Antabuse.

Here we go, no turning back now.

Have a feeling of anxiety in me; alcohol, my crutch cannot be inside me as long as I am on this drug. It's time to face my fears; find out who I am and what I really stand for. To be comfortable in my own skin. In my good sides and bad sides. To ride the wave of postive and negative emotions.

[Samstone]

Re: Newbies Nest

Londoner, I read your "last supper" post. just remember the past is just that. Look FORWARD to an existence that has some substance and being relieved of all the garbage that existed. Don't look too far ahead (yep, a day at a time) and NEVER look back. Above all, enjoy being sober!! It really beats the hell out of feeling like shit.

Sam

[paulywogg]

Re: Newbies Nest

Excellent to read this Londoner! Great post Sam

[wagmor]

Re: Newbies Nest

NS - sorry to hear about your mom, but glad you were in the state of mind and body to be there to help/support. Once again quitting was a good choice!

Londoner - ok friend, here we go... We'll be right here as you face your fears :hug:

Hypernova - glad you're back as well - tuck in tight!

Pav, Lav & others in the U.S. - glad you had good labor day weekends, Isn't it nice having three full days and knowing you'll remember every minute instead of spending the whole time in a boozed up haze?

Hope any nesters anywhere near all of the storms, flooding, hurricane, etc are safe and sound! On this side of the country, it seems like everything is on fire - extremely hot, but also numerous wildfires. We've got ash falling in our neighborhood/city, with mandatory evacs of several small towns, a stretch of highway closed, and blazing skies from the sun coming through all of the smoke and ash. Our nearest fire was caused by some dumb-azz who decided to set of bottle rockets or similar in a wilderness area.

[Pavati]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi, Nest:

Quick check in on my way to work.

Hypernova - welcome back. It IS incredibly stressful to deal with a parent with dementia. I have one, also. He, too, was very good at hiding it until he wasn't. Someone else just said this, but after I had quit for a while I realized that a lot of my anxiety was actually CAUSED by alcohol. Although I am in a lot of stress right now because of many family health problems as well as a new and demanding project at work, my anxiety level is nowhere near where it was when I am drinking. I know you know this, but getting distance from alcohol will only help you get through this trying time. And you have the whole nest behind you...

Londoner - I am very excited for you! I know it is a scary leap to take, but you'll never regret it.

Hi, Sam. Great to see you pop in. Hope all is well.

Looks like another hurricane is headed for Florida? Thinking about you all on the east coast.


Pav

[NoSugar]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hello, Nesters. Thanks for the good thoughts. Sadly, things seem to be going downhill with my mom literally being out of her mind with pain and probably drug interactions. I will be going back tomorrow for a couple days. I'm stressed, of course, but not further burdened by having to acquire and hide numerous little bottles of wine, knowing I'd be chugging them in the gross hospital bathroom. THAT is a far cry from the romanticized adverts about alcohol, isn't it? THAT is a junkie getting a fix. Anyone who has made it to this site should picture themselves that way any time taking a drink seems like a good or necessary idea. It isn't. It does us much much more harm than good and there's no going back. I promise you it is not a struggle once you accept that for you, it is poison. Take care, NS

[Byrdlady]

Re: Newbies Nest

Londoner,
I remember being scared to death of what the future was going to hold for me without AL. It was just unthinkable. It had been by my side thru thick and thin....all my friends drink, my hubs drinks, my coworkers drink, how am I going to function in a world where everyone drinks but me? Answer? JUST GREAT. You are going to be amazed at the growth you will experience. Trust me, AL only held us back. You are about to discover your authentic self and you will like what you see. It is natural and normal to be anxious, you arent getting your 'fix'. In another two days you will feel so proud, and ready for this new life....its yours for the taking! Good things are ahead! Hang in! Byrdie

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good evening Nesters,

Argh, just lost my post

Just want to wish everyone a safe night in the nest. Thinking about all of you, especially those going thru some stressful times.
Hang in there & stay close to the nest. We are stronger together :hug:

Lav

[Roobs]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hello everyone,

NS, so sorry to hear about your mother. I hope that there will be a way to manage her pain. Hugs to you.

Londoner, as Byrdie says, "All you have to do is get through this day, "don't think about tomorrow, next week or next year, just today. You can worry about tomorrow, tomorrow.

My day started off feeling blah and blue but I managed to get a workout in and that made all the difference. The days I don't feel like exercising are usually the days I need it the most. I wish I could just wake up with a surge of endorphins every day but alas I must work for it.

Good night,
Roobs

[lifechange]

Re: Newbies Nest

Morning Nesters,

Not much going on here.. just too much work at the moment.
NS, I'm very sorry to hear about your Mom.. thank goodness you're able to be there for her completely. Thank you for sharing that and sending you love.
Roobs, I completely agree with you.. the days I don't want to do it are the days I need it the most!
Londoner, good for you for taking that step..like so many have said here, I wish I would have had the guts and the support to stop drinking at your age. I've noticed there are more and more younger people getting sober and it seems there's a great on-line community via instagram/blogs, etc... I know that doesn't help in person.. but maybe it could still be nice to build a strong on-line group. If you want, I could email a few to you..

I hope everyone is doing well.. I'll see you all this evening.. big hugs!

[wagmor]

Re: Newbies Nest

Aarghh... lost post

[wagmor]

Re: Newbies Nest

NS - so sorry to hear of your mom's pain. That must be terribly difficult for her AND for you. :'( Sending you both love and support :hug:

Roobs - totally agree with you about how helpful exercise can be. Glad you got your workout in and now you get to enjoy the endorphins!

The only news in Wagland is that I've made the difficult decision to decline some work (one client) and I wouldn't have had the clear thought to do that without a solid quit under my belt. Not that there weren't times I had to back out of commitments while drinking - there were loads. What I mean is that in the past, I would commit and then get started with something only to realize that my al-clouded brain had been the part that made the commitment (sure, I can do that!) but in reality I either didn't want to do it or I couldn't. I recently got offered a gig to work with a client - and did initially say I'd consider it, get more info etc - as I've interacted with this client a bit over the past few days, I've realized that I truly do NOT want or need to accept this particular assignment and after sleeping on it last night I've decided to decline. It feels so good to have the clear thoughts that allowed me to evaluate that and make a decision BEFORE getting into something and then having to worm out.

Otherwise, we're all still watching ash fall from the fires nearby. Friends have had to evacuate, and we've got our couch opened up to anyone who needs a place to crash. Some truly beautiful wilderness areas are ablaze due to the careless antics of some teens with fireworks, and that alone is heartbreaking. No lives lost yet but homes and businesses will be lost.

I'm not much of a "prayer" but I'm sending all sorts of positive thoughts and energy toward those in the path of hurricane Irma. I hope the predictions of damage are wrong and that everyone is able to stay safe.

[Pavati]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi, Nest:

So sorry, NS. I hope they can control it soon.

Roobs - exercise has been mostly squeezed out of my routine lately (note the passive tense - I don't have to take responsibility!), but your post was a good reminder that I REALLY need it now more than ever.

How's day 2, Londoner?

Happy SOBER Hump Day.

Pav

[ssd858]

Re: Newbies Nest

NS - I am sad to hear about your mom:hug: I hope that they can ease her pain some. It is so painful to see our parents in pain.

wags - isn't so nice to have a clear head?! And to feel confident in your decisions!

My brother is in Key West and I am super worried! It's awful - the rest of his family is in Houston. They are ok, thank god, but now the weather is heading his way!

[wagmor]

Re: Newbies Nest

NS - I am sad to hear about your mom:hug: I hope that they can ease her pain some. It is so painful to see our parents in pain.

wags - isn't so nice to have a clear head?! And to feel confident in your decisions!

My brother is in Key West and I am super worried! It's awful - the rest of his family is in Houston. They are ok, thank god, but now the weather is heading his way!

Wow ssd - from what I've heard, lots of people are pretty scared throughout Florida and many are evacuating even before the path of Irma is well-predicted. Is your brother planning to stay, or is he watching and thinking about evac'ing? And then to also have family in Houston - that's a lot of storm impact on one family!

Hugs to you to support your through this worrying time. I hope they are all safe.