Newbies Nest

[Roobs]

Re: Newbies Nest

L.c. So sorry for your loss. Hopefully remembering what a lovely light in your life will help you stay positive
and also help to guide you.
Roobs

[Roobs]

Re: Newbies Nest

Inthesky, I'm concerned for your husband. Like Lav said, can you make sure he's sipping on water or something with electrolytes if he won't see a dr.?
Stay vigilant for yourself. Can't wait to hear about Otis.
Roobs

[Londoner]

Re: Newbies Nest

I was out for the first real time at the weekend. I was out at a pub with a large group of friends so I dosed up on AB to make sure I didn't relapse and more importantly strengthen the anxiety-drinking stimulus-response.

The main takeaway was: a friend I haven't seen in a while was fairly well inebriated. I say myself (the drunk me) in him right there and then. Being loud, obnoxious, operating under the false confidence of alcohol, thinking his actions and jokes are hilarious etc. At the time you think you're being Mr. Charismatic. That's not him sober. And the other people there who were sober were finding him annoying as hell.

That was me. I had been missing alcohol because I (thought) I liked the escape and also the 'good memories' I had when blind drunk. There has always been a piece of my mind gagging to go back to those times every weekend. There still is, but less so now. That is the first time I saw the other side. The side that I had been living for a decade. Now the lure of alcohol is weakening. They weren't really good memories. They were actually pretty false. There was no real connection or experience, just isolation.

Sure, I didn't do anything mad or crazy this weekend. But I had a good time and can remember what happened. I may of blurred into the background. But I want to go out again and do the same. I want to be able to connect, laugh, joke and remember it all.

And I know that he would of felt horrible (and possibly lonely) the next day. That's me talking from experience.

There's 10 years (and probably more) of damage to work on here. This is a long term project.

[Pavati]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi, Nest:

So sorry for your loss, LC. Nice that you had that relationship.

Way to go, Londoner. That other, drunken side isn't too attractive, is it??

Happy Birdy, Byrdie. Hope someone made a cake for you for a change.

Gotta run. Have great, sober days.

Pav

[wagmor]

Re: Newbies Nest

Londoner - sounds like you had a much better time without drinking! Sometimes I think it's a gift to be able to see our "drinking selves" in others while we're sober - gain some clear insight into how messed up drinking was for us. Great job!


So, I'm not sure which is the case, but I either had a fleeting thought about drinking yesterday, or I had such a thought in a dream. I honestly can't remember which it was - just that it happened, and that when it happened I thought to myself, "Oh, I didn't see this tempting situation or trigger coming..." I didn't act on it, not sure I was even strongly tempted - just a passing but strong feeling of how I needed a drink and that I hadn't anticipated that particular trigger.

Regardless of whether it was real or just a dream, I'm taking it as a signal to shore up my quit. There's clearly something in my brain telling me of some vulnerability, and I want to get right on that.

Otherwise, it's a good Wednesday here. Hope you all have fantastic days/eves!

[Inthesky]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good Morning,
I'm very sorry to hear of your loss LC, sending you love and strength.

Londoner- Congrats on a night out AF! Your a rock star in my books. I have some friends that I could never go out with and stay AF, in retrospect I don't think I have ever hung out with them without a drink or two in my hand. I do miss the laughing, joking and seemingly heart to heart talks but, I fortunately have other friends that love me and are willing to go AF when I'm around to support me and hubby..in a couple weeks we will be attending an event with them. Pretty excited to try out my new Normal lifestyle, not the Go Big or go home one.

Into Day 3 with hubby, feeling a lot less terrified of his withdrawal symptoms. He has now stopped vomiting, thank goodness! His balance and shaking has greatly improved. ( he can now drink out of a cup without a lid) I have been giving him electrolyte drinks, water and liquid vitamins, they seem to be helping. He hasn't ate much besides a couple crackers and a few spoonfuls of chicken noodle soup, but it's a start. Sleep has not been kind to him either. It doesn't help that neighbours were yelling and playing music till 6:30am. The police came and shut them down though so maybe a nap may help now that all is quiet. I said lots of prayers for him in the past few days asking for him to find the courage and strength to make it through this and accept this new adventure in life. I think someone was listening :heartbeat:

Tomorrow I go get Otis!

Happy Sober Wednesday!

[moonking]

Re: Newbies Nest

Sky - my husband and I are planning to retire (well…IF we get to retire! lol) in the RV. We want to sell the house and travel the world. Where are some of your favorite spots? Right now we only have a 30 footer, I’d imagine that would get tight if we were in there 24/7. And I’d miss taking really long, hot showers! Hope your husband starts to feel better soon. I can’t imagine the physical pain he’s going through at the moment. That has to be really scary.

LC - I’m sorry to hear about your loved one. Never easy to lose someone, no matter the age. My grandmother died at 91 after a long hard battle and she was so ready to go…we all knew that, but it didn’t make it any easier.

Lav - that’s why you get an RV! We have a memory foam mattress! We’re out int he middle of nowhere as well, so no trick or treaters for us. We always buy candy though. Just in case.

Happy birthday (a day late), Byrdie!

Londoner - that’s great! Good job. I understand seeing the other side. I’ve seen it many times, but always managed to tell myself that wasn’t me. Or I wasn’t that bad. Or I was actually funny.

All good here. Some lovely person decided to share their nasty cold with me, so I’m gearing up for round 2 of a cold. This one is worse, with the sinus headache and sore throat and there is nothing I can take except for hot lemon tea. ARRRRGHHH. Morning sickness seems to ebb and flow, really thought I was on the up and up but it seems to have hit with a vengeance again today. 2 more weeks, I can do this for 2 more weeks. I think. I know one day it will just end and this will be a distant memory, but for now it sucks so bad. Everything is just clouded with this stupid nausea.

Anyway - day 67 and counting.

[Hypernova]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hey everyone. Been staying away from here mostly out of guilt. I can't believe that I'm having such a hard time navigating myself to a day one AF. I am not feeling well to say the least and all my stress is made worse by drinking. I can't even think straight. Don't know how I am going to arrive but checking in here is my first step. I will at least check in daily and read posts until my mind gets it. Best to everyone, Hyper

[Guitarista]

Re: Newbies Nest

'Things do not change; we change.'

Hi Hyper. that's your signature line above. :thumbs: Ditch the guilt stuff pardner. No call for it 'round these parts. Great to see you and good work checking in here. I think you are right, it's a first step. Just take care of you for now and nestle in here.

Hi LC. I'm sorry to hear of your loss. Condolences to you and family. Take care my friend.

Sky, sounds like hubby is getting better slowly. Don't forget to take care of YOU as a priority. Plenty of self care. You sound great.

Great stuff Londoner. False hollow experiences with huge servings of false connections and very real isolation. No thanks!

Travelling the world sounds a top plan Kingy. I can't imagine what you're going through, but you're doing an amazing job! Everyone here is doing an amazing job.

Happy birthday for the other day Byrdy!

Got an aunty in emergency surgery right now after a simple operation went wrong. So some family responsibilities today. Good thing i'm sober as usually any kind of emotional family situation requiring me to be responsible would have me wanting to run the other way. L8tr g8trs.

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good evening Nesters,

Really starting to look & feel like fall around these parts. Kind of cloudy today, I could use a little more sunlight

G, sorry about your aunt, hope everything works out OK!

Moonking, boy you sure never get much of a break, geez! I really hope you feel much better very soon

Hyper, you & I have been around this joint for a long time. We know what we need to do, we just need to motivate ourselves to get the job done.
I was completely finished with returning to AL over & over again when I first found MWO. I was about disgusted with myself as a person can get. I fearfully but effectively vowed to myself that I would drink no more & I haven't. You can do the same, we all can as long as we are willing to commit ourselves 100%! Keep checking in with us!

Inthesky, I am glad to hear that your husband is improving. Now's the time to start convincing him that this quit is THE final quit for both of you. You have a team so take advantage!

Londoner, good to hear about your weekend! See? It can be done!

Hello to everyone & wishing a safe night in the nest for all!

Lav

[Byrdlady]

Re: Newbies Nest

Thank you all for the birthday wishes! I had a great day. It was back to the salt mines today. Good to see everyone posting! Hugs to all. Byrdie

[lifechange]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi Nesters,
It's a quick fly by kindof morning.. I didn't have much of a chance to read back yesterday so I will catch up with you all this afternoon.
Happy belated birthday, Byrdie!!
Wishing everyone an easy day..xx

[Pavati]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi, All

Hyper - sorry to hear about your troubles. Can you trick your brain? Instead of "quit forever," can you tell it "quit for today?" Then you'll have the strength to add on more time. You really can do this!

Sky - that sounds like terrible withdrawal. I hope that's it for his drinking! I am interested in the RV stories as well. We don't have one, but I am always intrigued...

When I step back and look at my life right now, I see a heck of a lot going on - many, many stresses with family illness, teenagers, new job, etc. I can't believe how much easier it all is to deal with now that I'm sober. I actually can face things and get through them (the only way out is through says my friend G), rather than running from them behind a bottle. The truth is, cliche as it is, life IS full of ups and downs. Being sober for both stages is a far superior way to experience life.

Happy SOBER Thursday.

Pav

[Hastowork17]

Re: Newbies Nest

Just another quick fly-by from me - I rarely use a computer at home and work has just been so busy, I've not had a chance to catch up properly.
LC - so sorry for your loss.
Sky - gosh, your husband's withdrawals sound horrendous - makes you realise just how serious a business this is. I really hope he is through the worst.
Byrdie - happy belated birthday.
Hyper - I recognise you from some of my time lurking, welcome back and here's hoping you find your day 1 again. G0d knows, I can appreciate how hard that is.
I met a friend in London last night for a pub dinner and a pub quiz - armed myself by going to a meeting nearby beforehand which was really good. Different to our local meetings in some ways but in others, just the same, and just as comforting to me. And then we won a bottle of wine in the quiz for coming last - oh, the irony! I let my friend take that of course, it looked cheap and nasty anyway!
Tonight I am not going to a meeting as I am meeting my mum for a curry (mmmmmm) and then going to catch up on some TV and hopefully some sleep.
Right, best finish some more tasks so I can justify heading off soon to go and eat, catch up more soon.
x

[Guitarista]

Re: Newbies Nest

Yo nesters near and not so far. W'dup?

My aunty is stable and doc and nurses happy with proceedings so far. Phew. thanks all.

Good job Hasto! Pav, i agree with your reflection in above post. I take a step back these days, take a few breaths, and look at my life. A heck of a lot going on here too, with family young and old having some difficulties, school assignments to finish, my bands album to finish, extra paid work on next week, some community projects (unpaid passion) i'm involved in this weekend and ongoing......but i can embrace it all thankfully. I am really warming to the idea and concept of 'handing it over'. To who? For me it's handing my concerns that are out of my control over with faith and non attachment to 'the universe' to decide what to do. My attitude these days is - whatever will be, will be. I can't control everything nor should i worry about trying to. This sounds like what religion has been yapping about all these years. Handing your worries and concerns over. Handing over what i can't control. I'm warming to this idea. It makes sense to me, and is almost zen like. Less of a blind worship, more the idea of letting go. Letting go of what i cannot control. This makes it easier to live in the present, and not stress about the future. Geez sherlock. Maybe you're getting it.

Take it easy out there and get some self lovin' in today K? K.