Newbies Nest

[available]

Re: Newbies Nest

Evening nesters

G after ten years of this job i dont tolerate fools or idiots anymore. Its a wonder anything gets done in a hospital and all i want to do is start the job, ask if needed and complete the job. shame i have to deal with the idiots to get to the end stage. My tolerance level has lowered immensely since i have gotten older and stopped drinking!

Its been a stressful week with SO's aunt still in hospital and me keeping an eye on her. She is so much improved and probably the best i have seen her in 6 months so hopefully the nursing home will do what they are asked. I am going to take over dealing with the nursing home and her general care, dietary needs and making sure she is on the right meds. Takes some pressure off the SO which will be good. Im moving office also as they are renovating the ward i work out of, at least there will just be me and some spirits. the office is where they used to put the deceased bodies before they went to the morgue. lots of friendly company i am hoping. I will lose my lovely window view but im just grateful to have a job i love.

3rd acupuncture visit today and poppy was still a bit tender from the last time but she tolerated the needles which was good. i think she is 70% better in herself which is all we can ask for so after next weeks visit she will go on maintenance and if i think she needs a boost i will take her in. i am lucky i have a job that i can now take half a day off work without reprecussions or persecution.

Bought a pushbike from Aldi yesterday and the boys are having a competition on how much i will ride it ha ha. havent been on it yet!

How did your work doobie go Pav? hope your not hitting the bottle (i know you wont).

well off to do some work so i can hopefully catch up a bit.

take care x

[KENSHO]

Re: Newbies Nest

Glad you get some idiot-free time for a bit Ava.

Lifechange, stick close dearie. We are more vulnerable to those "voices" when we are not checking in daily with someone, even if it's not our intention.

I get to work from home today. Nice that there is not the pressure to "perform" in a meeting - but I run the risk of not focusing on what I should. I do plan to walk the pup and get some sunshine on my face - then dig in.

I have decided to drink less coffee. I think it is messing with my anxiety and my breathing. How can one be calm and relaxed when amped up? So it's one glorious, delicious cup in the morning, and then I'm switching to Turmeric tea. My body hurts - I really want to figure out what is causing it. I do well when I don't eat any of the offenders (wheat, soy, dairy, sugar, etc.), but I really would like to isolate the worst so I can have some treats sometimes!

The pup is on my lap in my office chair (65 lb. lab), so I guess that means I need to take her out now. Stick close everyone!

[wagmor]

Re: Newbies Nest

Pav - Cross post with you earlier and just now seeing yours - sorry to hear about your challenging work situation, but hooray for not feeling like drinking at it. Please let us know how you're doing.

Ava - fantastic that your fur-kid is feeling so chipper - sounds like the acupuncture is working quite well! As for the passive-aggressive PA, yuck - one of the hardest aspects of other people to handle. Hopefully that will iron itself out, and you'll be able to ease up a bit on your overloaded schedule as well. Would love to try a push bike myself!

Crusader - fear can be so powerful, and I'm sorry to hear you're experiencing some, but it also sounds understandable. Your awareness that that is what's going on gives you an entry point for dealing with it as best as you can. Loss and grief are exceptionally hard passages for most people, and there is no real hurrying of them to be done. Sending you hugs and thoughts of peace that yours eases gently for you. :hug:

Kensho - hope you're able to find some "you time" in all of the work hustle. Curious to hear more about the biofeedback. I had that type of treatment after a car accident about 15 years ago, and honestly never felt like it did much, but I always assumed that was just me or my particular practitioner, not the modality.

LC - you and I both need to get on here a bit more. Let's do it together!

Happy almost-Fridays to everyone (or already Fridays by the time some of you see this!)

[Crusader]

Re: Newbies Nest

Morning all!

It is four weeks for me, I type with a smile.

I pulled my lower back yesterday. I’m not sure how other than to say, “wow, I am out of shape”. I was outside the days before doing more activity than I’m used to with an ax, but felt nothing then. I guess it waited to come along later. It’s definitely a loud call to how out of shape I’ve become in the last year. As soon as it feels better, I’ll be on the ‘get in better shape plan’. That was marked for my 30 days add in, so hopefully this will feel better soon.

I’m going backwards in responses in the nest.

Wag, thanks for the warm thoughts and the hug. Yes, we have to get through these changes in life in our own way. It certainly takes time. Yours was one of the first posts that let me know I was not alone in the experience when I first posted. There is a small amount of comfort in relating to others knowing we all get our times of grief in this human experience. Hugs back to you.

Kensho, funny reading your post this morning. I just walked back to my computer to read after telling my boyfriend I’m a coffeeholic. Lol I only drink it in the morning. I started making some caffeine free iced tea a week ago to drink during the day. I’m searching for options to drink in place of alcohol. I picked up some Tazo Passion last week. I started with it plain, but added in maybe a quarter cup of orange pop with each glass now. I know the pop/soda isn’t a healthy choice, but it’s better than alcohol for now. It’s tasty to me, and much better than a whole can or glass of pop/soda. I need to cut my morning coffee intake down as well, but that will come later. I enjoy it so much each morning.

I have problem foods as well. I used to have so many it was basically impossible to get enough calories, but through time, I’ve recovered from earlier calamities/circumstances and can eat more now. When I hear people talk about unexplained aches and pains and ailments, I always mention they can have food intolerances. Dairy is a big one. Red meats can be a culprit, night shades, and so many with our individual biochemical makeup. Some seem to be more universal to many of us. My Moose Tracks run is about over. I’ve had some four or five (?) times in the last month when a big craving hit. That will drop back off now as I can feel the effects it has had on me. I’ve allowed some indiscretions for the first month, but will continue to correct unhealthy choices in a planned manner. That sounds like what you are doing. You are ahead of me in your AF time.

Ava, your SO is fortunate to have you and his aunt. I feel sorry for those in the hands of the medical system that don’t have someone looking out for their best interests. I’ve had too many bad experiences with the system for myself and others. It’s even more of a motivation to become self reliant than I already was after this last run in of horrors. I would say having a profit oriented medical system and an unhealthy population often due to profiteering/marketing of unhealthy lifestyles, is a disaster in the making or a bed already made. That’s my opinion from lots of experience. Each of us need to learn to take care of our bodies and minds to the best of our ability or control. This coming from someone who learned this early on and then went right back into abusing it. Geeze! It’s easy to slip even after you know better. I think that has something to do with timing that I’ve talked about before.

Lav, you are such a good mom to the chicks. I love it! I’m a big animal lover. I don’t think chickens are coming into my life, but maybe a dog in the future. When/if I can take on that long term responsibility.

Bryd, it certainly seems to work for you. Outside of the job stress, you appear to be enjoying life. I was AF for a long time years ago. I went through some tough times, and made a new friend that put me right back into the jungle of craziness. It’s been years now, so time to move back into sanity. The insane life really leaves a mark.

To all, have a good AF day. Love and hugs!

[KENSHO]

Re: Newbies Nest

Ok, biofeedback. A friend recommended it because she flagged sensitivities - which I'm trying to figure out. She strapped me up and put on a chakra meditation. The machine used electromagnetic something to scan my entire body and processes. I left with a paper that gave my results. Part of it was to measure and raise my personal "vibration" (which I don't really understand). The other part was to list my top risks, emotions, organs in stress, imbalances and identify allergies/sensitivities. Then she gave recommendations about nutritional needs and daily affirmations.

My practitioner didn't spend much time going over any of the results, which bothered me a lot. I also felt very out of it and yucky the rest of the day and was left with more questions than answers. I'm very open to all of these kinds of things and find truth in many of them. But I needed more of a discussion afterwards. I may call her back to request this. She identified corn, dairy, gluten, soy and whey as top food sensitivities, but she also said I have parasites, am jealous and am showing signs of trauma (and I can't figure out any of those). SO, without more explanation, I'm not sure what to make of it all. I didn't feel better, I felt confused.

UPDATE: I called her and asked her a bunch of questions... so I feel much better. RE: food sensitivities, she said a reactivity score of 100ish shows mild sensitivity, but my top offenders ranged in the 200-250 category - meaning my body is actively reacting to them. Anyway, you all don't need to know about my gut, but I feel better about it. It's basically a snapshot at your body's energies at any given time and flags on anything that is out of balance. All taken with a grain of salt of course. Hope that's helpful!

[Guitarista]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hola Nesters near and not so far,

Congratulations on 30 days booze free Crusader! You're on your way. I'm enjoying your thoughtful posts.

Kensho, sounds like you have some useful info there. For me, corn, gluten, wheat and dairy puff me up a little behind the eyes, otherwise no obvious other side effects. but i try to avoid them now, just so i look a little better maybe, instead of like i've had a night on the turps. I have 2 coffee's in the morning then that's it, unless i have a long late night ahead, then i'll sometimes have another in the arvo. I cut down from 2 sugars in my coffee to one about 2 years ago, and eat less sugary cakes and cookies these days even though i love em. I'm amped up enough especally if i'm into something.

My latest travel idea is to Brazil. I want to buy an air ticket by end of march, so if i can get a round the world special taking in a few joints for the right price i'll be happy. I'm talking to some ladies in Sth america so right now i'm keen to visit with guitar and some travel and little gigs in mind. Maybe some luuuuurve if i'm lucky. lol.

The combo of time off boozing (6 months) and setting goals i like and acting on them seems to have changed my thinking. I no longer have a desire to drink or get numb. Of course, i need to be vigilant and active with my daily self care practice as things can go pear shaped in life at anytime. But i am building inner resilience kinda by default, through daily action doing things i love to do. Todays mantra - Do what you love.

Take it easy out there. Big waves to all.

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good evening Nesters,

I hope everyone had a nice AF Thursday
Didn't do half the things I planned to do today because I decided to go along with my husband on his doctor's visit. It's something I feel the need to do from time to time to keep him on track. He never remembers to ask the questions he needs to ask, etc. Somewhere along the line we seem to change from wife roe to mother role, ha ha!!!

Crusader, CONGRATS on your 30 AF days :yay: :welldone:
The hard part is done now, that's great. As you move forward work on convincing every cell in your body that AL is never the answer to anything for us. We need to remain AF to live our lives in a happy & healthy fashion.

Kensho, I'm not real familiar with biofeedback either, interesting. I did a home test kit a few years ago to identify food allergies/sensitivities. All I had to do was send a few tiny blood samples & received a pretty thorough report. Some things I was well aware of but some things I reacted to were surprising. Fine tuning our diets is not easy but necessary if you want to feel healthy!

G, my skin crawled just a little when you mentioned wanting to travel to South America. Isn't that where we lost our friend Mario not so long ago? You know how much we love you & want you to be safe & happy.

LC, are you experiencing a little 'end of the winter blues?' Spring is taking it's sweet old time where I am & I am trying my bets to keep my cool!!! Get some sunshine as often as you can.

Ava, your new 'office assistants' could be interesting, ha ha!!!!

Hello to the rest of the crew & wishing everyone a safe night in the nest!

Lav

[Byrdlady]

Re: Newbies Nest

Nesters, it is with great pleasure that I get to venture into the prize closet and walk out, prize in hand....for Crusader! Here is your hat, camoflague, just as you requested! :guy: There’s no doubt, those first 30 are brutal...now they are behind you! Well done and I agree with G man, in that I thoroughly enjoy your thoughtful perspective also. All there is now is rinse and repeat! Keep up the great work!
Goad tomorrow is Friday! Byrdie

[BelleGirl]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi Nesties, Just checking in to keep myself accountable. I'm pretty tired. It has been a crazy few weeks at work as the boss is trying to see all the March clients before he goes on a 2 week trip. I'm all caught up, so tomorrow I'm off and have a hair appointment. some Me time.

KENSHO thanks for the info on the biofeedback. What kind of practitioner does this type of thing? I'd be afraid that I would be told I have so much wrong that I'm a lost cause...:harhar:

Crusader, nice job on the 30 days...just keep right on cruising...you're on a roll. I also love your thoughtful posts, as I said before. I have a lot in my brain, but it is hard for me to dump it all as I am not such a great writer. I wish I was, but that is just not my strength. I'm more of a math brain. Geek, etc.

Lav and Byrdie, it is always comforting to see you two in the nest. Your support means so much to so many of us.

I'm reading "Of Mice and Men". My daughter had to read it for English class and suggested I read it. Hmmmm. Not sure why, but I have always wanted to catch up on reading the classics, of which I avoided in my younger days. I'm only on chapter 2, so no spoilers please.

Take care all and remain safe and vigilant. I'm on lucky day 13 today, drinking my half diet, half regular tonic water. I never drank much gin and tonic...instead I just slugged the gin. But I have found that I really like tonic water.

[KENSHO]

Re: Newbies Nest

OMG - what a morning!! Worked until midnight, and then this morning my daughter tells me it's Dr. Seuess day and she needs to dress up. :eek-new:

Well, let me tell you that moms (and neighbor moms) are quite adept at pulling off amazing things at the very last minute. Black tights, red/white striped shirt, red tutu, French braids and big puffy red bows in her hair. A 6 minute shower for me, two "eclectic" lunches packed, a car loaded and let me emphasize one thing:

... I would have lost it if I was hungover. I feel tired, but balanced, coherent, and I'm so glad I could be there for others this morning.

NOW, looking forward to being there for myself tonight when this crazy week comes to a close. I'm wiped. I'm sleeping in and not cooking a thing!

Have lovely days all you lovely people!

[Crusader]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good Morning Nesters!

There seems to be a misinterpretation of my four weeks I posted yesterday. Four weeks is 28 days 4 x 7. There is a lesson in there if anyone looks. lol However, I am on day 29 today, so I'll take it. Tomorrow is my 30 day mark and as far as how I feel and my determination, it's all the same...I'll be 30 days AF. Thank you for all your encouraging and supportive congrats. Byrd, I grabbed that hat like an early Christmas present and opened it. :victorious: I like it. I'll wear it when I do my walkabouts, and I'll be invisible.

We are in winter wonderland today. I love it!!!! The skiers will be rejoicing this weekend. The valley is getting its share of snow and it's so beautiful. The mountains are sharing this time. I'm not sure, but my coffee is better this morning while watching the birds dig through the blankets everywhere.

Kensho, curious if you've heard of 'leaky gut'? Not to get too personal, but is that part of your gut issue? Well done on the quick action. You are one hundred percent correct concerning being able to handle it better without the alcohol effects. I think we can all relate to losing it when we feel like garbage.

G, I like your perspective on not drinking by default. I think that is an important concept involved in long term sobriety. You enjoy life as is and you don't want the drink. That's part of my plan moving forward. I'm changing things in my life, so they become my focus and not the alcohol. Good job!

Thank you, Belle and everyone else for the kind words.

Have a great AF day, all.

[Pavati]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi, All:

Well the personnel thing was brutal, and I kept telling my colleague that I was so worried about it that I was actually feeling dizzy and my chest hurt. Got home that night and BAM - it turned out I was dizzy and my chest hurt because I was working up to being felled by a terrible bug. I have missed three days of work so far - something that has only happened once before that I can remember, and that was a LONG time ago. I feel bad because I left my partner with the fallout this week, but no one would have wanted me around with a fever. Still feel like crap, but a little better. Hope I'm on the mend. Thanks for thinking of me, Byrdie. I have too much empathy to be a perfect manager. I know I did what I had to do, but I can't help but feel sad for the person. Of course, I think maybe all the stress leading up to that helped deplete my body of defenses to fight this bug. Thanks for your kind words, everyone.

Belle - LOVED that book. I love all of his writing.

G - Wow - Brazil sounds like an amazing goal. Keep that focus and off you go.

Ava - You and the ghosts should have a good time. So nice that you love your job - what a change.

I can't remember what else I read. Take care of yourselves, nest!

Pav

[narilly]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hey nesters,
I am in Mexico and finally have time to post. First of all, congratulations Crusader! Way to go! You are kicking butt? Byrdie is great with the prizes.
G you are sounding great and Brazil sounds fab.
Pav, hope you feel better soon.
Bell, Ken, Lav, everyone, hello

Over the years it’s been the hardest thing for me to stay sober during a holiday. Not now. I feel really strong in my quit, it is shocking really. But since ‘I don’t drink’ everything is A OK.

Have a good one and don’t drink.
Xo

[Guitarista]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hola, or as they say in Brazil - Ola!

Thanks Lav for your concerns around travel. I'll be careful and do my research before trekking across unknown lands.

Thanks Pavi and Nar nar nar nar nar. I've been warming up for some travel for a long time. A local romance put a spanner in my spokes for a little while late last year, then funds ran low, now funds are back up and i'm not bogging myself down in imagined logistics. I'm just getting a ticket and - going!

Great post Kensho. Man, imagine if you were drinking. You might still get most of that stuff done, but i'm tipping it would be a little half arsed, and unlikely you'd remember those little, quick special moments and glimpses, such as a kids eyelashes in the sun, or the joy of even a few seconds of 'me' time in the morning sipping on a freshly brewed cuppa.

Day (*&^%!! here, or thereabouts. Closing in on 200. Holy burpin buddhists!

I asked the bloke on the corner selling tickets to boozeville if he had any alternatives. He said yeah sure, here ya go buddy. how about a ticket to Black panther. Thanks mate.

Take it easy out there. Git some self lovin in today, K? K.

[Byrdlady]

Re: Newbies Nest

Pav, Im so sorry you took sick! Thats ALL you needed. Wishing you a speedy recovery. Get some rest!
Kens, you are not fur, you are a blur. You are a wiz, oh yes, you is! Well, Im no Dr Suess, but nice job on your magic act this morning.
Narilly, that’s muscle memory in action! Its a nice feeling when NOT drinking becomes perfectly normal. Very proud of you!
Crusader, if you are here for any length of time, you will find that a bunch of alkies will always start the party early! Sorry! We just couldnt wait! BTW, I forgot to tell you that its also customary to give a speech! Howd you do it? What worked this time? These are not mandatory, so dont feel any pressure, but its alway nice to hear these. You’ll find a lot of these in the Tool Box, too. They are worth their weight in gold. We are so proud of you, Im glad you liked your hat! Wear it loud and proud!
Hugs to all, NO GREEN BEER here, no geen beer there, no geen beer anywhere! I cant stop rhyming, its all in the timing. (Shut up, Byrdie!) :heartbeat: