Newbies Nest

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good evening Netsers,

OMG Byrdie, that meat buffet is a complete turn off for me. No wonder you felt comatose after a pass thru that food line, haha!
I hope the trade show goes as well as can be expected

Hi there Wags & Pav, hope you had a good day.

G, I hope your job situation is cool enough for the likes of you

Ava, grumpy & sick patients in the winter time - I remember & am grateful to be retired. Hang in there, it's just getting started.

Belle, now that you are in tripe digits you should be feeling a bit stronger & determined, right? Good job!

I spent 8 hours today watching my 7 & 9 year old grandsons. They started eating 10 minutes after they arrived this morning & continued eating until they left, ha ha! Guess I'll hit the supermarket tomorrow to restock, geez. I am grateful for these opportunities to spend time with the grandkids & I know for sure they wouldn't be happening if I was still drinking.
Just another reason to keep my quit going & going!

Wishing everyone a safe night in the nest!

Lav

[Guitarista]

Re: Newbies Nest

Got the job!

Thanks Ava and Lav. Ava, job is education and activities worker running groups. Mental health is one of my focuses. How are you going?

Take it easy out there and git some self lovin in K? K.

[available]

Re: Newbies Nest

Congratulations G that is so wonderful to hear and much deserved. You have come such a long way and i for one am so proud of your achievements, its also one for us as a whole. Just goes to show what appears to us when we have our shite together. so happy for you.

Im great now all the stress of the last few weeks has abated. loving my job and life today!

[Pavati]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi, All:

CONGRATULATIONS, Mr. G. Of course you deserve it, and it sounds like a great job for an active man.

Ava - Rupey is home! That made me chuckle because it reminded of my mom's two dogs from years ago. They died fairly close together, and she came home with only one box. "They're together forever! I got two small dogs for the price of one medium dog!" It was perfect as they were best friends, but it is a story typical of my mom who loves her dogs completely, but also loves a good bargain. You sound great!

Lav, I am raising two sons who are now teenagers. I can't believe how much they can eat! I held a baby the other day, and I have to say I am ready for those grandchildren. Of course, I hope it is years away for my kids, but it was fun to be with a youngun again.

Happy Hump Day! Let's make it a sober one...
Pav

[wagmor]

Re: Newbies Nest

Congrats [MENTION=7261]Guitarista[/MENTION] !!!!!

Happy hump day everyone! Make it a good one (or hope it was, for everyone already on the flip side or checking in later)

[NoSugar]

Re: Newbies Nest

It is so cool to read about all of the opportunities we're offered and can take advantage of because the competent, creative, healthy people we really are were able to re-emerge after we quit poisoning ourselves everyday!

So many have turned their lives around and gone on adventures @Guitarista, @narilly) or taken on jobs that wouldn't even have been offered while we were addictively drinking (@available, @Pavati, and again, @Guitarista). @Lavande and I never would have trusted ourselves or been trusted by others to give primary care to our grandchildren. Think of all we all would have missed!!

It's easy to wonder how we could have handled the stress of being so busy (@wagmor) or in a soul-crushing job (@Byrdlady) if we were still drinking. The point is --- we wouldn't have had to - we would have just been drinking, stumbling through, and trying to accept and justify our limited lives.

Congratulations to everyone who has gotten themselves free! xx, NS

[KENSHO]

Re: Newbies Nest

Trying to keep my head above water here. Feeling really down and stressed. I just can't keep up with anything - home things, personal things, accounting and work. There simply isn't enough of me. Add a few external stressors to the mix and I am positively down. I shouldn't have cooked with wine last night because I did a double take at the smell. No drinking, and I don't intend to - just feeling upside down at the moment. I hate feeling bad at everything I do right now

I'm sure it will pass, and I am not a drinker, so no worries. Just going through a rough time at the moment.

On the other hand, AVA, its awesome to hear how much you are liking your job! I recall you saying this is a place you never would have been if you’d continued drinking - score!

PAV, something so amazing about holding babies! Definitely not wanting more here, but I hold one any chance I get!

G - congrats on the new position. I hope you feel like a million bucks

I'm going for a run.

[NoSugar]

Re: Newbies Nest

@KENSHO, are you possibly setting expectations for yourself way too high? And are you projecting your disappointment at yourself onto others? I used to do that ALL THE TIME. I wouldn't get everything done that I thought I should be able to do and would immediately assume that all the people I felt like I had let down were annoyed/disappointed/mad/etc. at me. It turns out people are rarely thinking what we think they are!! Hopefully you can sort out some reasonable goals for yourself, do your best to meet them, and let the rest go. My kindergarten teacher (who clearly had a good read on me!) gave me this quote: "Do your best, forget the rest, and don't worry". And it remains really good advice for me to this day.

I've been thinking about you all day, @lifechange. I don't know if you've made any big changes in your life but it is apparent to all of us how you've changed with this time away from alcohol. You seem so much more content with yourself, like you're treating yourself with love. :hug:.

[Guitarista]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hola everyone.

Thanks SB and y'all. SB, how are ya?

LC and Kensho. 2 people who absolutely RAAAAWK! Passionate, dynamic, beautiful stars! I bet you both rock the world around you big time. A run is a good place to go to Kensho. Hope things are settling down within. :happy2:

I gotta say i'm chuffed with the new position. It's dayshift for starters, and i know what days i'm working. This is now a cool weekly schedule where i know what i'm doing and when.

Doing my best, forgetting the rest, and not worrying. I reckin if my intentions are good and 'pure'/genuine and i am doing my best, then this is plenty. More than enough and i needn't worry what other picky pilgrims are thinking or saying.

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good evening Nesters,

Wow, ONGRATS to G on the new position :welldone:
I am a firm believer (now) to be happy with what I have & anything else that comes our way is a true gift from the universe
I know having a regular schedule is a blessing. I worked most of my life without anything like that, ha ha!


NS, I know & you know how awesome we are
It took some work to convince everyone else after we quit but we got there. Persistence certainly pays off, right?

Kensho, don't punish yourself for not being able to keep up with such a demanding schedule. Treat yourself with kindness & the love you deserve.

Hello to Wags, narilly, Pav, Byrdie & everyone else checking in tonight.
Today I restocked the fridge after the little boy assault yesterday & took my dog in for her yearly checkup. The vet thinks my pup may be developing liver issues, oh boy. Will wait until the bloodwork results come back & then make a treatment plan. It's always something.
Wishing everyone a safe night in the nest!

Lav

[KENSHO]

Re: Newbies Nest

Thank you friends. Getting better by the minute. I organized myself, took some time for a run and just kept putting one foot in front of the other. Progress is progress. Just sometimes I run into the times when the accounting need to be done, two projects just requested serious deadlines, can't even touch three others, I owe several people calls back, need to send a new contract - and my days are seriously cut short by driving the kiddos around for summer things. Sometimes it piles up just due to the nature of project work - but I still have not learned to adapt and let people know that they will get their stuff later. That's what's missing. I seem to think I should still try to get it all done, and it's not humanly possible. That IS why I used to drink - the reward at the end of the pain of trying to be superhuman. Every night. I don't do that any more - alcohol's not an option to be my crutch. And I do probably project some NS, though clients expect a lot of me at this point in my career. Thank you for the quote - I think I'll keep it

Going to do some dishes, and help my son with his play lines - he has three shows tomorrow.

Hope your pup is ok Lav.

Night night.

[narilly]

Re: Newbies Nest

Wow, so many posts!
G, congratulations on the new job, you deserve it. I had to laugh when you said ‘chuffed’, that is definitely not a word we use up here.

Well, I am still looking for a job, hopefully one comes up in the next month or so. Meanwhile I am really enjoying th summer. I have been gardening a lot and hanging out with my son. He seems to have a good grasp on his drinking which is great.

Kensho, you work so hard.i understand project work is crazy but make sure you take some time for yourself.

Lav, hope your pup is ok.

NS, you are amazing, you too Pav, Ava, Life, Byrdie, Belle and everyone else.

Xo

[KENSHO]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good morning! Been thinking seriously about y'all's comments on giving myself a break (I'm not from the south, but I find that word very useful at times!). I think the struggle for me is that I own my own business. I make commitments to clients that seem very reasonable at the time, but then it piles up and I'm left with either keeping my word or missing my deadline. I can push people off only so much until I end up delaying the project with the builder or they get frustrated. And owning means it's not just doing design work. It's also project management, accounting, marketing, website development, networking, drafting, meetings. It's a lot of hats. And in-between, about 20% of the time, I get to do the creative stuff that seems to make it all worth it. I guess I just take on too much work. I have watched a friend and college buddy take her career to the top - all by herself, just like me - over the past 15 years. The difference is that she has no life - she regularly works 60-80 hours a week and doesn't have kids. If I took on fewer projects, my work load might shift between "not much" and "middle of the road" - instead of "doing fine" and "I'm drowning!". Then I would embrace the other parts of my life more. (but I would make less $$) OR I could get a regular job and leave both the work and the responsibility at the office when I come home - let me tell you how good that sounds right now!

So, if I have no alcohol to numb my pain, I guess I have to figure this out. Though I'm conflicted a bit about wanting to take my career to the top - and I could - I decided long ago that I wanted a family, and that personal relationships and spending time in nature and with family and traveling and nurturing my soul was more important. So the question is... how can I do that? I either need help, or need to take on less. I'll ponder.

Thanks for listening. It's the biggest theme in my life and directly related to my past alcohol abuse, so I appreciate you guys being here while I work it through! Y'all 'da best!

Hi LC, Byrdie, G, Narily, Wags, Lav, Pav, Cowboy, AVA, Belle, Rusty and everyone I missed!

Are you here RAVA?

[Rava]

Re: Newbies Nest

Yes I am here....

[Pavati]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi, All:

Kensho - I often joke that I'm a C+ wife, a C+ parent, and a C+ worker. Of course I believe in myself more than that, but sometimes it does all get overwhelming. I know you've probably thought of everything, but could you hire someone to do the books or some of the less arty stuff? Or take on one less project than you think you can handle just to give yourself a break? I'm glad things are looking up.

Lav - hope that fur baby is ok.

Byrdy - I miss you around here. Hope you're still alive and that there will be a way for you to crawl out from under with that job.

And speaking of jobs, Narilly - I hope you find something soon. Is this common with your industry?

I, too, have a job that is too big for the hours I am given. It is frustrating and leads to both my working too many hours and also my not doing my best in all realms. I communicate a lot with people who expect things from me, but I do think that sometimes that perfectionism that helped contribute to the alcohol dependence plays a part in workaholism as well. I don't want to be judged as incompetent, so I sacrifice myself to get it all done. I am taking a week off next week - in the mountains with no electricity, so NO EMAIL!!! Whoot! I'll see what pile awaits me when I return, but I am very excited to be getting away.

Take care of yourselves, Nest. No one's perfect, and we can't do it all.

xo
Pav