Newbies Nest

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good evening Nesters,

This is day one of my road trip with daughter & her family. We are in a cute little Air B&B in Ontario
Going out tomorrow to see the falls & surrounding area. I am so grateful for this invitation, feel blessed.
Wishing everyone a safe night in the nest & nice day tomorrow!

Lav

[lifechange]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good Morning Nesters,

now it's really been too long! I'm out of the habit of posting and each day I procrastinate because it feels like too much. But it doesn't look like things will be slowing down any time soon.. and my mind is in it's best space when I'm posting here DAILY! This I know about myself..

Rava, that was a great post.. I'm happy to hear you feeling so good and strong. It's amazing how much time we gain when we stop drinking, isn't it? Taking the option of drinking off the table is such a relief.. for me the brain chatter, trying to bargain with myself constantly was the biggest torture.. even worse than the hangovers, I think..

Belle, big congrats on 128/129 days! It sounds like everything is going well for you and yours..
Nora, good to see you here!
Nar, good luck with the exams and on the job hunt! I also appreciated the discussion on getting the ego out of the work place.. enjoy your gorgeous weather. We're having the same, perfect with blue skies, warm temps and a slight breeze..
Wags, what a wonderful vacation you had.. I didn't know places like that existed. I would love to be out in nature like that..

I was so sad to see André back on his old bench yesterday. I'd seen him last weekend, sitting across the street, looking like he'd been beat up (he said a shelf feel over on him) and asked what was going on.. he was too drunk to make much sense.. then the next day I saw him at the park and we talked a bit and it seems he's lost everything again.. a million excuses as to why and they all have to do with other people being the cause. He doesn't really blame but he's resigned. Yesterday I sat with him on the bench and we talked for quite a while. I don't think there's anything I can do to help him.. except to talk to him when I see him and treat him nicely.. he's in such a state that it isn't pleasant to sit too close. I asked if he needed anything and he said, no, I have everything I need..

Big hugs to all of you, Ava, Pav, Kensho, G-man (so glad you're back with us:love, NS, Mywayin, Byrdie, Lav, francis, Marylou, Hyper.. and anyone else flying or stopping by the Nest today.. Like Rava said, we have the ability to make the decision to positively change our lives any minute of any day.. xx

[Rava]

Re: Newbies Nest

Looks like I am the early bird in this nest! Took off work today so hopefully gonna enjoy some time outside! Reading a book called My Beautiful Boy about addiction. Plan on some hammock time with that! I hope everyone has something good planned for today. My plan does not include drinking. I was grateful that Sunday was not spent worrying and fretting about how I was gonna drink and hide it all at the same time. There is way too much effort involved in that sort of thinking. Clearing up your head of boozy thoughts, allows more time for better ideas not to mention a healthier lifestyle!

[KENSHO]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good morning. We’re at the airport and will catch a plane home soon. La Guardia is something. Passed the booze shops and I smelled it for some reason, maybe a broken bottle. I’m infinitely glad I’m not tied to that cycle any more. The wedding we attended was off the hook... I’ve never been to that caliber of party. 5 Star, Black tie swank... and someone was throwing up in the bathroom at 10:30 pm. I did not, even once, want to be a drinker. On our way here I was feeling like a tired mom who deserved an escape. Booze crossed my mind briefly but then it left because I know it is not the answer. Everything became so much easier when it finally sunk in that I can never drink and not be abusive and obsessive about it. I’ve made peace with that and now life doesn’t seem empty without it... in fact I imagine life with alcohol as something very undesireable.

Happy Monday... have a strong day!

[Byrdlady]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good morning. We’re at the airport and will catch a plane home soon. La Guardia is something. Passed the booze shops and I smelled it for some reason, maybe a broken bottle. I’m infinitely glad I’m not tied to that cycle any more. The wedding we attended was off the hook... I’ve never been to that caliber of party. 5 Star, Black tie swank... and someone was throwing up in the bathroom at 10:30 pm. I did not, even once, want to be a drinker. On our way here I was feeling like a tired mom who deserved an escape. Booze crossed my mind briefly but then it left because I know it is not the answer. Everything became so much easier when it finally sunk in that I can never drink and not be abusive and obsessive about it. I’ve made peace with that and now life doesn’t seem empty without it... in fact I imagine life with alcohol as something very undesireable.

Happy Monday... have a strong day!

ACCECPTANCE is where it's at (pardon the dangle). Kensho, I'm so happy for you, it really is like those little boys trying to get out of that cave. Once I got out, I REALLY don't want to go back.
Rava, keep on truckin! I hope you are like me, once I got past Day 13, it just got easier all the way around!
Great to see everyone, hope you have a happy Monday! Byrdie

[Pavati]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi, All:

So weird. Twice or three times in the last couple of weeks I've replied here in the nest and then can't find my post. But then I wonder if I wrote a reply at all. Weird.

Anyway - I'm here.

Rava - after you read that, read Tweak, the same story written by the son in that book. It was so difficult and compelling!

LC - I do like it when you check in... I'm glad you're ok, and sorry about Andre.

Kensho - YES! Acceptance is really the key. I really like the Bubble Hour podcast on acceptance - they frame it nicely. The debate whether or not to drink every day is not healthy, and ultimately, your will power will give up as it gets exhausted. Keep the choice about booze off the table - you don't drink - and then the debate can be about which of your new coping skills are you going to employ... That is sad about the 10pm puking, at a party like that...

Good to see you here, Nora! Hi, everyone else. Off to work. Happy SOBER week.

Pav

[Cinders]

Re: Newbies Nest

I have to agree with others before me. Drinking is off the plate.

Otherwise, I just go bonkers.

For me, abstinence is so much easier than trying to moderate. I remember an old timer putting it "I just won't get back into the ring with the beast. He always wins."

I am only speaking for me, though.

[Overit-still]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good morning! Half way through day 11 here. I don't know how I got ahead of my days, no wonder why I thought it was going so fast.

Tried to start off my day with gratitude. (we'll see how long that lasts )

I love to read about other's experiences, I'll have to check out those books for sure.

Have a great day everyone.

[Overit-still]

Re: Newbies Nest

I was so sad to see André back on his old bench yesterday. I'd seen him last weekend, sitting across the street, looking like he'd been beat up (he said a shelf feel over on him) and asked what was going on.. he was too drunk to make much sense.. then the next day I saw him at the park and we talked a bit and it seems he's lost everything again.. a million excuses as to why and they all have to do with other people being the cause. He doesn't really blame but he's resigned. Yesterday I sat with him on the bench and we talked for quite a while. I don't think there's anything I can do to help him.. except to talk to him when I see him and treat him nicely.. he's in such a state that it isn't pleasant to sit too close. I asked if he needed anything and he said, no, I have everything I need..

LC, that is so kind of you to actually take the time to visit with Andre'

[lifechange]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi Over-it.. thanks for that. Well done on 11 days!:happy2:

[KENSHO]

Re: Newbies Nest

LC, I was thinking the same thing. Ultimately, we are all on our own journeys. Sometimes, all you can do - and the best thing you can do - is listen to someone. It must be so heartwarming to him that you take the time. I wish your kindness was in more peoples' hearts.

We made it home! I have an empty house for 20 minutes! Where the heck is G? Buddy. Come back to us.

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good evening Nesters,

The day is almost over but I wanted to say hello & wish everyone a safe night in the nest!
Wonderful to be on vacation with my happy granddaughter & her parents

Lav

[STEADFAST]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi everyone,

Quick check in from me. Despite a major source of angst being removed (my job) I'm still battling anxiety. I know it will subside (just as it has in the past), might just take a little while. I've read back a fair way, but feel overwhelmed if I try to respond to so many posts!

Do want to say hi to Byrdie - a major life revelation you are confronting, I can't begin to imagine what it's like, but I wish you peace.

Ava, you're sounding happy in your job, which is great. :happy2:

And NoSugar, thankyou for your candid post about us worrying about what others might be thinking. Your posts are always so eloquent, and this one resonated with me and I'm sure many of us here. Thanks again.

Nice to hear you're enjoying your holiday, Lavande, yay!

That's it for today, peace to all,
Steady

[NoSugar]

Re: Newbies Nest

Quick check in from me. Despite a major source of angst being removed (my job) I'm still battling anxiety. I know it will subside (just as it has in the past), might just take a little while.

Good to see you, Steady, but I'm sorry you're still feeling some anxiety. Maybe you've read about my interest in the 3 principles. Here are a few links concerning anxiety you might find helpful. I do, anyway - especially the video. I hope you start feeling better soon. :hug: NS

Common Sense or Fear? Our choice. - Three Principles Living
Feeling Our Way through Life - Three Principles Living
Anxiety Disorders - Dr Bill Pettit - YouTube

[Pavati]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi, All:

Steady - I hope you do get to the bottom of that anxiety! NoSugar usually does have some good advice. Funnily, that idea of acceptance has helped me considerably in other areas of my life. There really are things I can't control, and accepting that I can't has been enlightening. Maybe some of that will help.

I'm on a sugar tear here - I think because it is summer and I'm still working my butt off I think I "deserve" ice cream. I have one more dessert that I made for a dinner party tonight, then I'm going to try to tone it down...

And parenting teens is rough. So many hormones! In combination with my own swirl it makes for an interesting household... Glad things are settling down, Belle!

Mr. G did check in on his own thread - he's present and accounted for!

Happy Tuesday,
Pav