Newbies Nest

[Byrdlady]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good evening, all.
I agree, Pav, this is simple, not easy. Some days, my only goal was to not drink. Day by day, it worked.
For some reason today, the thought of a drink crossed my mind. I pulled out my tools and pushed that thought out. I cannot afford to let those thoughts get traction, so far, so good. After all this time, I know not one of us is immune to relapse. Im not interested in another Day 1 or fighting cravings again. Nothing is worth my MindPeace.

Stay the course, nesters, no matter what and no matter who! Byrdie

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good evening Nesters,

Happy to report the biggest pieces are back in the house, now it's just boxes & trash bags full of stuff - that I can handle. I'm in no hurry so I'll just take my time. I am also watching my 7 & 9 yr old grandsons this week, maybe I can get them to help a little. Maybe not, haha!!!

Over-it, as you can see in my signature line I quit smoking just weeks after I quit drinking. Both quits were very important to me at the time so things worked out! Put your mind to it & stick to your plan, everything will be OK

Pav, our house is 15 years old this month & it just seemed like a good time to get this big job done. It looks so much nicer

Slo, I also gained a sugar addiction when I quit. I beat it back with some L-glutamine, worked great. Keep doing whatever you have to do to meet your goals!

The skies opened up this afternoon & I think we got nearly 2" of rain, geez. Good thing is the temp immediately dropped 15 degrees, yay!

Wishing everyone a safe night in the nest!

Lav

[Overit-still]

Re: Newbies Nest

Over-it, as you can see in my signature line I quit smoking just weeks after I quit drinking. Both quits were very important to me at the time so things worked out! Put your mind to it & stick to your plan, everything will be OK

LAV-thanks. I changed my signature line. I'm tired of living the lies.

[frances]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi all - happy hump day to everyone!

Overit - good for you for quitting smoking - I think that's great and hopefully it won't be too terrible for you.

Congrats Lav on the new floors - that must feel so good! I have some carpeting that is pretty old in my house and I'm ready to get rid of it. There are a lot of things I'd like to do - maybe we can tackle some of these things since both kids will be out of the house this fall and we'll have more time. And thanks for the link - I will have to check that out more often!

Byrdie - yes, just push those thoughts away! It's weird, and scary, how that can happen after so long.

Slo - thanks - it did feel a little weird to have someone make a comment like that about me not drinking but it was someone who I think has his own problem with drinking and probably needed to make himself feel a little better too. I don't think I would have ever said something like that to someone, but I remember always thinking people who didn't drink were a little strange - I just couldn't understand it - I get it now and have tons of respect for anyone who doesn't drink but in my heavy drinking days the concept was totally foreign to me.

Hi everyone else and hope you all have a great day!

[Byrdlady]

Re: Newbies Nest

Heading to St. Louis tomorrow for my nephew's wedding. I'm all packed....it sure feels good not to have worry about running out of booze. I used to hide it in the lining of my suitcase, but there was no hiding the weight of it or the sloshing! Looking forward to a couple days off!!!
Over-it, I used to hear Oprah talking about being "Authentic". I didn't understand that until I got sober. Being truly authentic is EVERYTHING! Stick with us, hold your bag up high that you are taking the steps to better your life! Hugs dear lady!!! Byrdie

[paulywogg]

Re: Newbies Nest

Safe travels Byrdie Overit,great job on quitting smoking,I keep trying but meh,at least I got down to 3 cigarettes a day,which is still annoying cuz there's that want/need for them still and I hate that! Pav,I've always kinda thought that maybe I overthink quitting drinking and maybe that's why it's been such a struggle,what a dumb thing to overthink about,I want to just file it away in my brain as something I did in the past and not now,yet it does slip back into the front of my other thoughts sometimes,yuck,Slow,how's it going? I looked up the sobrenix and seen the ingredients,hope it's working wishes for a great day for all

[Pavati]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi, All:

Pauly - I totally get it, and sometimes I just don't want to think about it. I don't obsess, and as the cravings/thoughts subside on their own, I can settle down a little. I do think, however, that having a sober intention every day keeps me sober. That way I am "tuned up" and ready to go in case something bigger comes along - my sober tools are ready. That's why I come here nearly every day and keep in touch with you all, my sober support group.

I notice it is darker in the mornings when I wake up! That gives me anxiety as I feel like I don't get enough daylight through the winter. I realize that it actually is still light and summery here for a while, and getting anxious about winter now makes no sense and only ruins the beautiful weather we're having. Man, the brain is a complicated organ. Takes a lot of reining in. I am reading "Why Buddhism is True" about mindfulness and meditation. It is a deep look into why it works. Now I just have to stop reading about it and start practicing...

Happy Sober Hump Day!
Pav

[Overit-still]

Re: Newbies Nest

Happy Humpday! I love Wednesdays. It's usually quiet in my office and I get a bunch of piddly stuff done that has just stacked up. It's a good clean up day.

I finally lost my first official pound! YA ME!

Still having weird dreams.

[Slo]

Re: Newbies Nest

[MENTION=20472]Overit-still[/MENTION], I’m having vivid weird dreams too. Good luck with the no smoking! I guess may as well nip it in the bud now before it gets even more entrenched, since you’ve recently been off of them for 10 years.
[MENTION=17650]paulywogg[/MENTION], that’s great that you’ve gotten down to only three cigarettes a day! When you’re ready to totally quit, it’ll make it that much easier.

Byrdie, that’s a good point that drinking for us means fighting cravings all over again, and who wants to keep doing that?

[MENTION=20191]Pavati[/MENTION], do you care to elaborate on any of the work you do to stay sober with immediate friends & family?

I’m so glad my sugar cravings have lessened!
I’ve been going out for a bike ride on most of these warm July days recently. We haven’t been having rain and hardly any wind either.
I think it has helped me a lot through this getting off of alcohol.

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good Hump Day evening Nesters,

I hope everyone had a good day, I did
Got some more things unpacked & survived another day with my non-stop eating grandsons, haha! They come for breakfast & leave shortly after dinner - lucky guys!

Wishing you a safe trip Byrdie, enjoy the time off & the wedding.

Talking about quitting smoking & drinking at the same time reminded me why I made the decision to do that. Although I smoked much longer than I ever drank they just seemed to go hand in hand. I realized right away that if I started smoking again I would likely start to drink again & vice a versa. SO, I have decided not to mess with success & have remained abstinent for the rest of my time left on this planet. There's no argument going on in my head, that was all settled a long time ago. That's a great gift to give yourself guys - you can do it too

Wishing everyone a safe night in the nest!

Lav

[Jude58]

Re: Newbies Nest

[MENTION=19596]Slo[/MENTION]...glad to see you posting here. It really does help! :thumbsup:

[Pavati]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi, All:

Slo, I took it slow. At first I just told everyone that I was sober for December because I get depressed in the winter and was trying to see what part alcohol played. Then I just kept not drinking. I had a glass in my hand, and if people would ask I would say that I tried not drinking for a month and felt so much better I decided to keep going. My family are big drinkers, but they're not big pushers. I gradually confided in my family and close friends but even now many people don't know I don't drink. I did tell my husband and talked to him a lot about what I needed from him. He still drinks and we have alcohol in the house, but there were a few times when I asked him not to drink in front of me. I told him many times unequivocally that I can't drink, and frankly at that point he probably knew that was true also. Even after 8 months, I told him that if I EVER said I think I can drink again he was to sit me down and remind me that I can't. I am lucky in that he didn't feel like he was losing a drinking buddy - he doesn't need a drinking buddy - and he has been very supportive.

At a party, no one knew WHAT was in my drink, so no one asked. I just slipped out and went home when I needed. I also checked an read this site and other blogs every day, sometimes many times a day. I walked a ton and listened to podcasts, mostly the Bubble Hour. AND I also said no a lot. I had a lot of invitations that I just didn't want to accept because I was still uncomfortable being sober. Even for big family events. As I have learned how to be me again, I don't have that problem, but I still say no more than I did just for self care.

I hope that helps. I don't know what your issue is with family and friends. My very close friends told me later that they were worried they wouldn't have fun with me any more, or that they were a little uncomfortable at first because they didn't know how to act, but we're all good now. I don't think it was a surprise to anyone that I needed to quit...

I'm off to work. Hope all you nesters are well.

xo
Pav

[Overit-still]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good morning! I was getting ready this morning, putting makeup on in the mirror and remembered that this time 3 weeks ago, there would be the bottle already open in the kitchen. I HAD to drink in the AM to quit shaking. I was so miserable but really didn't realize it. I mean I did and I knew I had to do something if I wanted to keep living in this world. People were up running, walking, birds whistling, people starting about their day and I was alone in my house drinking just to get moving. Pitiful.

[available]

Re: Newbies Nest

Morning nesters

Well my tooth abscess has finally subsided, its been a rough week.

Frances, menopause is doing my head in, literally sometimes! my dr suggested ad's and i so didnt want to but i ended up starting them and i told her the other day i actually do feel a lot more on an even keel. I dont want to kill anyone so that is a bonus for starters and my mood is more settled. It sucks being a woman sometimes but we will survive. The worry is will others! Oh i had a chuckle about "boring" Frances. I thought when i stopped drinking that i would be bored out of my brain but i am so not and if people think i am boring then dont associate with me, i say!

Glad to hear you have your house kind of sorted Lav. How is that chicken going now?

Great post Pav, i relied on my children a lot to help me through the rough days, i found a phone call always changed my mindset from obsessing about al to thinking of other things. My kids say to me that they always thought i would drink again and "who doesnt have a drink for over 4 years! Me thats who and i know they are really proud of me and cant imagine me drinking now but i do know they didnt think i could or would in the beginning. I suppose i had let them down so many times when i was badly drinking.

Slo, all you have to do is take each day as it comes and not drink. Like Pav, if i didnt feel safe going somewhere where there was al, i didnt go. I found the feeling of deprivation the worst so why put myself through that. Now i know i have the tools to deal with any person asking why i dont drink and the negative comments and i have a care factor of zero.

Over, how good is it to look in the mirror and like the person staring back at you!

I was supposed to go with the SO to a friends place the other day and i was talking about what i would take to drink. He said that he was sure that there would be something other than al there and it took a good ten minutes to get through to him that i needed to take my own non al drinks. He was worried about me walking in with my stash but to me that is always what i do. Al is always freely available as the majority of people drink.

Well TFIF in Ausland. Hi to everyone.

Take care xx

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good evening Nesters,

Survived day 3 with my grandsons & I even took them to a small zoo nearby
Unpacked a few more bags of household things.....getting there.

Hello to Pav, Overit, Ava & everyone!
Ava, my injured chicken has integrated back into he flock, she seems fine. Over the weekend one of the other chickens decided to just take off. She hopped over the fence & disappeared. That one was injured from a previous flock & required a lot of TLC to get her back into good shape. You would think she would be grateful enough to hang around & lay an egg once in a while, ha ha!

I have a kid free day tomorrow (supposedly) so I will fill my time with gardening & other useful stuff.
Wishing everyone a safe night in the nest!

Lav