Newbies Nest

[BelleGirl]

Re: Newbies Nest

it's been a while, which included lots of drama from all angles. I'm still hanging in there...however I went to put something in garage freezer this evening and saw my husband's bottle of Hendrick's gin. good stuff. had about a 10 second thought about how would't one big slug be great. then I said to myself "seriously, dude...you want to risk going back there???" Those GSR brothers would be waiting for me with open arms and I don't EVER want their visits ever again. So I did what I had to do and put the gin in the way back. I'm starting to think that having beer and booze out there with all the teens around isn't such a good idea. Need to talk to hubby about that.

hope all are doing well. I really need to read back a good bit. hopefully it will lift my mood...at this moment I would probably prefer to run away, but that ain't practical.

So here I still survive...day 145.

[Slo]

Re: Newbies Nest

[MENTION=16180]BelleGirl[/MENTION], 145 days; that’s great! Sorry about being unexpectedly confronted with the gin. Ideally he could keep his stash in a small locked refrigerator (if they make such a thing as a fridge with a padlock) -keep the teens out and keep you from having to find it mixed in with the food.

Day 4 post-drinking and the day before a full moon, bad combo for me; I’m moody & exhausted and needed a nap.

Spent the evening watching people have drinks together with appetizers, but didn’t mind too much and focused on the food instead, and then at the Indian restaurant had two mugs of wonderful authentic milky chai tea —perfect! Although now I can’t fall asleep.

My husband’s sisters are in town to clear out some stuff from their parents’ house after my in-laws’ somewhat recent deaths.
We actually had a wonderful evening together as a family, with my daughters excitedly trying on their grandma’s clothes and taking various sweaters, coats and things to remember her by when they wear them. And we all took various other items that will remind us of them. It was bittersweet, but some nice closure. It’s heartwarming to see the family resemblance, seeing my daughters carry on many features of their grandparents. Young daughter especially is looking more like her grandma as she has matured into a 15 y/o.

Thank you so much to those of you who helped me process my FIL’s sudden death during a medical procedure, [MENTION=17650]paulywogg[/MENTION], [MENTION=24196]Rava[/MENTION], [MENTION=18725]NoSugar[/MENTION], [MENTION=8356]Lavande[/MENTION]. It really did help, and I’m ready finally to let it & him go now (which is good since it was escalating my drinking). I thought other family members and health professionals and he himself were making poor decisions during his monthlong illness too, so it’s not just my fault. And there’s some good things too, like he’s back with his wife whom he missed terribly, and he didn’t have to suffer through a slow demise, which is what he was facing with his end-stage heart disease.

So all-in-all, a good evening appreciating family and getting closure and practicing not-drinking while others are drinking!

[satz123]

Re: Newbies Nest

day 5??

I LOVE the name Dopey - one of my favourite words
Give us some insight on how you are getting on.
Posting regularly is one of the main things that got me sober - 5 years ago I had my day 1.
This site is awash with years of knowledge - and it's there for you - just ask the questions.

[Pavati]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi, All--

Welcome, Dopey! I guess you should be on day 6 by now? Welcome and let us know what's going on with you. You've come to a great place.

Belle - what's going on? Usual teenager stuff? I'm having a bit of that here, too, along with a sick parent. This being in the middle is for the birds. I am glad you checked in here and didn't drink the gin. I wonder if you keep a journal or have another good outlet other than just checking in here a bit. I ask because one cautionary tale I keep in mind is the blogger One Crafty Mother (she's also a co-founder of The Bubble Hour). After 5 years of sobriety, including sober blogging and podcasting, she got breast cancer and her dad died within a short time of each other. She was baking cookies, went in the pantry and drank the bottle of vanilla. Then the relapse was on, and it took her a DUI and losing her kids for a while to get her back on track. She has great reflections on it but it boils down to self care, and letting go of perfectionism (she has a great podcast episode about it where there is more detail). If you have a lot going on, and alcohol is talking to you, you can resist it with sheer willpower for a while, but willpower gets tired and you'll give in if that is all you have. I'm not saying it HAS to be MWO, but my research shows that some sober community is a key part of staying off the grog. This was not meant as a lecture but as food for thought. I hope you take care of you!

I am now paranoid. My status says I am "four years and counting" but I didn't change it to be that. Anyone else have a status they didn't write? Also, NoSugar and Byrd are suddenly hyperlinks, and anywhere their names appear I can click and be taken to their profiles (I know they're GREAT, but I didn't set that up, either). Any ideas what happened?

Well, off to the salt mines. I woke up at 4am with the worst sinus headache I've ever had. It is still lingering but much better. Anyone ever get those? Any hot tips for preventing?

Lav - that sounds awful. Can chickens swim? Byrd - good luck with that trade show. Pauly, how's tricks? Good to see you stop by, Satz.

[NoSugar]

Re: Newbies Nest

That is weird [MENTION=20191]Pavati[/MENTION]. [MENTION=9757]NoraC[/MENTION] appears to be hyperlinked, also. Well, heads up, clicking on my name isn't going to take anyone anywhere interesting :haha:!

Changing status on an avatar while drunk sounds like exactly the type of thing I used to do (followed by frantic searching of my social media pages and e-mail outboxes to see if I'd written anything mortifying!!!) but because you don't drink, that's not the explanation!! Maybe some system updates around here had unexpected consequences.

[Overit-still]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good sober morning!

Not a good evening. We lost power at 5PM (I live in California and not enough power to go around) and it didn't come on until after 1 AM. The one good thing I kept reminding myself is that others have it worse (I was just missing my TV) and at least I wasn't bumping around in the dark, drunk. If I had been drinking, that event would have sent me to the f*ck its! and I would have had to buy an additional 1/5th (because of course I would already be drinking but can't run out and not have any for the morning!) and would have drank at least half that and felt like crap today. So glad I'm sober.

Also, you never realize how loud a ceiling fan is until it's been off but starts up at 1 AM when the power comes back on.

Anyway, just REALLY tired and cranky today due to lack of sleep. It was too hot. But, I will not drink!

Have a great day!

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good evening Nesters,

Better day today, no rain for the first time in I don’t know how long. Even the sun came back

Pav, I don’t think chickens can swim. I sure hope we don’t ever have to be concerned about that either.

Overit, we have been dealing with almost daily power failures this past week here on the east coast, all storm related. Last time it came back on atound 3 am & scared me, ha ha!

Hello & welcome dopey, glad you found us. Great work on your 5+ days now. Stick close to the nest!

Belle, locking up the booze when teens were around made sense at the time do that’s wha5 we did. That was actually before my drinking career started, believe it or not

Slo, glad things are better for you & your family now!

Byrdie, I didn’t mind being sent to one day seminars for work but they were close to home. Not sure how I would have handled something like your trade shows. I went to many embroidery trade shows over the years & hated having to drive to Atlantic City just to attend, ha ha!
I hope it goes well for you.

Hello to NS, kensho, wags & anyone I’ve missed.
I need to get back to my grandsons who have been here all day. I think they may end up staying overnight too, oh boy.
Wish8ng a safe night in the nest for all!

Lav

[Slo]

Re: Newbies Nest

I’ve had a horrible day of just complete lethargy, difficulty moving & thinking, overwhelming appetite. I never want to have alcohol again! Can’t keep going through this.

I actually had two daughters get married this year. So I drank through the first one in January, the entire week-long destination wedding in April, and now the at-home wedding reception in July. [MENTION=8356]Lavande[/MENTION], yes, the ceremonies were very, very touching & beautiful. I’m ready to be done with the accompanying wedding hoopla though. [MENTION=11555]mywayin[/MENTION] and [MENTION=16186]available[/MENTION], thank you for sharing last weekend how your daughters’ weddings were interfering with your quits. It’s just hard because as the mother of the bride you’re sort of a host so have to be “on” the whole time. I’ll have to figure out how to do this sober before daughter #3 gets married next year!

[MENTION=20191]Pavati[/MENTION], I have no experience with nor tips about how to handle a sinus headache. Sure hope it went away!

[MENTION=20472]Overit-still[/MENTION], I hope you can get a decent night’s sleep tonight, and have power restored.

[narilly]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi I am stilll here, just totally exhausted after starting this new job. So glad I am not drinking. Tomorrow I wake up Un Hung AND I get my first pay check! Woohoo!

Hello everyone, have a good one.
Don’t drink today.
Xo

[lifechange]

Re: Newbies Nest

Morning Nesters!

Quick fly by on my way to work..
I had a wonderful time hiking with my girls and then out in the country with good friends..
Now i'm suffering along with everyone else here from lack of sleep! too hot, mosquitoes, full moon and cat's meowing for their food at 5am.. I guess they're also affected by the moon..tonight it should be amazing..TFIF as Ava would say!
Pav, I appreciated your food for thought for Belle..
I know I have to get myself in here to post each and every day.. I always read. But the posting is what keeps my mind solidly in the right place! It reconfirms my mission, lets me connect with all of you.. I can relate to basically everything everyone says, or have been able to at some point.

Great work! to all of us, finding our ways out! doing the work, which is sometimes so very difficult.. but which allows us to accept and to be who we truly are.
Darnit.. now I really feel like writing!:happy2: reminder to myself that it usually does happen if I just begin.. even if I don't feel like I have anything to say.. but seeing that I'm already 10 minutes late and still have to get dressed..

Wishing everyone a nice and easy Friday..xx

[Rava]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good morning Nesters! I am just stopping by to say hi. I am reading posts each day and staying accountable. Some days are harder than others but being able to come here is good for me. My cravings are in my head and I have to work thru them the best way I can. The thought of just wanting to have a drink and be normal are not rational thoughts anymore. I have proved that time and time again by testing that theory thru half assed moderation. Moderation is wishful thinking for me and I know its not possible.........So onward to Friday. Hope everyone has a great day!

[Pavati]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi, All:

Rava - there's some good reading about urge surfing in the Tool Box. Keep it up! The cravings DO go away...

Great to see you, Nar. I figured you were getting adjusted to your new job. I hope you like it. See you tomorrow morning, Un Hung...

LC - Where did you hike with your girls? I love a good forest bath (or mountains, desert, ocean - whatever).

Still have that headache that woke me up again last night. I feel like it is a sinus headache because my face hurts, too, but now it is as the base of my skull. Mostly hurts when I move or stand up. Ugh.

Off to work. No ticket to boozeville here...

Pav

[lifechange]

Re: Newbies Nest

hi again Nesters..
the weather has taken a bit of turn and is offering the relief of a cooler breeze.. possible storms on Sunday and then high temps again next week.. we're like you, Wags, not made for the heat... and we suffer in the city, brick buildings with no AC. At least there are lots of lakes around and green parks. But still!

I'll be heading out of town next week for 10 days for a "pop-up" event which I'm excited but also very nervous about.. I know they all drink tons and it will be very stressful, pushing me to my limits. I told my closest work colleague last year about my drinking and she has been so supportive when we've been on the road. She doesn't drink much at all and hasn't had drinks at events when I'm around.. even picnics we go to together, she just doesn't drink. She can take it but prefers to leave it and I've learned a lot from her.. mostly that people really don't care whether or not you drink and that for the most part no "excuse" is necessary. Anyway, she won't be with me this time and I think I've decided to tell everyone clearly that I'm not/won't be drinking ahead of time.. and I think I'll even go into detail with the main woman I'll be working with, who I know well and who has been very open about her food addiction problems.. I will also take my computer and check in here each day for support. I will also review my Toolbox, re-read about surfing urges, etc.

Slo, I hope you got a good night's sleep and are feeling better today. I can imagine the pressure of being the mother of the bride.. when is the wedding next year? You have the advantage now, of being able to acquire a good amount of AF time before the wedding, which will help and be different from this last wedding which you went into as a newbie. You will have the opportunity to work through the event ahead of time, having the other two behind you.. you'll know more of what to expect and can set yourself up for success..:hug:

Over-it, I hope you got some sleep as well and are feeling better today.. I'm hoping and praying for a good night tonight.. I guess at some point, we'll fall into a deep 8 hour coma of exhaustion!

Nar, here's to paychecks!! and even more so to waking up Un-hung!

Pav, we were hiking in a lovely area funnily called the Saxon Switzerland.. It's a beautiful area and just a couple hours away from us on the train. Mostly it's just so nice to have the uninterrupted time with the girls.. my eldest said several times, how happy she was that we all like to hike together. It was super strenuous in parts, especially when we got lost! We finished this trail and will be looking for something new next year..in case you're interested..(just keep in mind that it's a terrible translation!)Stage 5 - Hiking on Painter's Way (Malerweg) in Saxon Switzerland, Saxony, Germany.. I hope your headache will be better soon. The only thing I know to do for those is take pain killers.. which I do 'cause I can't function with a bad headache..

Lav, glad the weather has mellowed out a bit for you.. hope the sun keeps shining and dries everything up a bit.
Byrdie, wishing you a good trade show!

ok. I'm off to make a bit of dinner. I was hoping to see the eclipse tonight but it's clouding up a bit..

[NoSugar]

Re: Newbies Nest

Preparation and visualizing really helped me, @lifechange. I imagined some upcoming work-related social events that I had to attend and "saw" myself doing and saying the types of things that are done and said at these mind-numbing events and it really helped! When it was really happening, I just followed the script I'd written and sort of memorized. After awhile these firsts became interesting challenges which, strangely enough, I kind of missed when all the standard "firsts" were behind me. Have fun and enjoy being proud of yourself! xx, NS

[Overit-still]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good day everyone! I did sleep better last night, thank you. I'm not so cranky today BUT I find my self plotting in my head to "allow just one drink" who am I kidding? It doesn't stop at just one and after one I would feel so disappointed in myself I would get the f*ck its!, and just go for it anyway, what's to lose at that point, right?

I just feel so good about myself not living in a lie right now.

I'm just feeling frisky right now. My mood is on a high, I'm feeling good, I just want to have fun and in my old book......that included letting go and having a drink.

I won't though.

Have a good day.