Newbies Nest

[Slo]

Re: Newbies Nest

Kensho, my 15 y/o daughter attended an up-close music concert this summer with a couple friends (plus a set of parents in the background), and the crowd was disturbing to her; she said she was surrounded by “lots of drunk and drugged people”. I was sad that she was immersed in that -what an eye-opener for her.

Pavati, those are good examples that you shared of youth-oriented activities that ideally would not be drinking occasions. Our youth must be thoroughly confused by the “do-don’t do” mixed messages that they receive about drinking in our current alcohol-obsessed culture.

I’m glad I finally have my head on straight and will no longer be part of sending mixed messages!

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good evening Nesters,

e were blessed with a not too hot but completely sunny day today. Were did that come from? Ha ha!

Byrdie, I hope you are relaxing now, you deserve a break

Pav, baby showers are also events that should be AF in my opinion.
Did you see the study released this week that says NO amount of AL consumption is healthy or OK. I guess that's something all of us here have figured out on our own

Rava, keep yourself busy tonight & check in with us if you feel wobbly. You can do this!

Kensho, We went to plenty of concerts in our time & I swear we always went sober, never any drugs. I always found those people to be annoying too. Definitely not what you want to show your kids unless you use those people as examples of how not to behave in public (we used to do stuff like that with our kids).

Slo, I could never have been one of those 'Do as I say not as I do parents'. That just seems idiotic, don't you think? Your 15 year old sounds like a smart girl

Hello to everyone else & wishing a safe night in the nest for all!

Lav

[Rava]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good morning nesters. Kensho, what a concert. Sounds like people watching was very insightful for you and your family. Last night, trigger night, I was able to keep myself so busy that when I went to bed, I was thinking Wow I didn’t even think about drinking all evening. That’s a great thing. Today I’m busy with the grandkids so another busy and eventful day. Looks like its going to be sunny and beautiful. That always lifts my mood. Hope everyone has a great Saturday! PS I know if I get wobbly to come here first instead of instantly giving in to my urges! Thank you all for that!!

[Pavati]

Re: Newbies Nest

Happy Saturday. One more weekend of work, and then I'm taking next weekend OFF (all 3 days!)

No tickets to boozeville here!

xo

[DriftyAlison0]

Re: Newbies Nest

Yeah seeing those get drunk that bad makes you wonder why do they do it to themselves. I had cravings bad last night and it was a fight not to drink. I kept myself busy so that helped and ended up going to bed sober. I feel a little sorry for them knowing what the morning after is going to be like. Drinking just looks like fun, but in reality it is not fun. I would love to be able to have 1-2 beers every now and then but I know that I can't so when I am going to have beer I make sure that its ether Odouls or Busch NA.

I just got to keep myself from drinking. I know that the cravings are starting to get weaker. I just need to get more and more days under my belt. I miss going out to karaoke but I will not be going to karaoke until I feel strong enough to be around booze and not drink. I did it with 2 baseball games now but they require a wristband to order al so its easier to refuse to buy the booze. But at a bar no wristband is needed so I need to be sure that I am strong enough to say no to AL when I am surrounded by it. Right now i need to focus on me and staying sober.

[Slo]

Re: Newbies Nest

I hope everyone is having a good day, and glad that you’re staying busy, Rava, with biking around the neighborhood to the rummage sales on a nice day, and spending time with grandkids.

I felt up-ended and out-of-sorts yesterday, but I always end up feeling that way on days when I’m with my mother. (She needed me to take her to & fro a medical procedure.) She just gossips viciously, and she excludes people; has her “in” crowd and her “out” crowd. Her mother was the same way and also played favorites with “in” children & grandchildren and “out” ones. So I just feel guarded around her since I’ve never been one of her favorites, and sensitive to my daughter being excluded in favor of her two younger granddaughters.
But I must learn to deal with her and to be careful to not let her set me off and end up drinking “at” her. I can’t do that anymore! And I have to remember that she is innocent in that she’s so deep into her family patterns of dysfunction and her personality disorder that she probably doesn’t even hardly know that she does these things.

So I’m glad to be feeling more centered today, and also blessed with a large chunk of alone-time. And SO glad the full moon is tonight since I tend to get wigged out before it. I’ll be on an even keel tomorrow!

Thanks for listening, and good luck with your weekends!

[Byrdlady]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hey, Nesters. I’ve been baking today and it was fun. I have my 40th class reunion coming up so I made some cookies for that. I am also meeting my new half brother beforehand, his birthday is September 15th, so I baked him a cake. I will decorate it tomorrow. It was a good day.
Here are the cookies , we were the Hickory High tornados! 7C22BFC6-97E8-4BAE-8DED-3BB4F44EA1FA.jpg

[paulywogg]

Re: Newbies Nest

Aww Byrdie,those are super cute Slo,sorry your mom picks her faves,that's not fair but like you said can't drink at her behavior,I've learned we just have to love our moms the way they are I guess,BTW,you are sounding like a brand new woman! It's exciting to"see" you growing so comfortable in your sober life,yeah! I'm feeling very lazy and tired today,just gonna lay by my dog on the couch and watch a new Lifetime movie

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good evening Nesters,

My son & grandsons just got home from vacation so they came over to get their dog. It was nice having 2 dogs in the house again, believe it or not.
The weather was just perfect, not too hot & lots of sun

Slo, that's a shame about your mom playing favorites like that. There's probably not a whole lot you can do about it either. It is her problem, don't take ownership of it, right? My mom was good to all 4 of us & has been gone for almost 32 years now, I still miss her.

Byrdie, great looking cookies as usual. Have fun meeting your brother, I hope it goes well for both of you.

Pauly, we have a head start on hay fever season here. The farmer across the road has been mowing his hay field all week. Hay fever makes me extremely drowsy & lazy

Hello to everyone & wishing a safe night in the nest for all!

Lav

[available]

Re: Newbies Nest

morning nesters

Well i am feeling human today, made a quiche and vacuumed and washed the floors all before 11am. God i remember back in the day when i was lucky to lift my head off the pillow at this time of day. the only thing i did was pop paracetamol and wish my life was over.

The SO was talking about going to a grand final football bbq that will be held in September, i didnt go last year and have no real plans to go this year either. He says we will go about half way through, which to me means when everyone is half pissed. I can guarantee i will be the only non drinker except the SO would only have those 1 or 2 beers. still amazed at how people do that one! I wont be going, id prefer to mop floors.

Oh Slo, i called my mother the dragon. She told my daughter she would never amount to anything, another daughter on her wedding night that it would never last and the worst day of her life was when i got married to the childrens father. Classy my mother and i used to drink AT her forever. I now seem to just resign myself to what and who she is. I must say she has moved closer to me and the last couple of visits have been good. i am always aware and wary but our relationship is a lot better after 4+ years of sobriety. I always figure it could not get any worse than what it was and i ignore her hurtful comments most of the time. As you say they are what they are and my mother is exactly like her mother was. As long as i dont pee her off i am ok in her books. I know i will never drink AT her again, no one is worth drinking AT.

The SO bought a full sized snooker table which leaves not much room for anything else in the house but i do love snooker and i dont have to leave the house.

Take care. xx

[paulywogg]

Re: Newbies Nest

Morning nesters,Ava,is snooker=pool? Its the only thing I could figure since its played indoors on a table Lav,I feel like between the California fire smoke,monsoon season and wind it's been hay fever all summer! I'm almost ready to see if I clear up in the winter like I did last year,ugh I hate wishing for time to pass but I've been a congested,sneezing fool all summer,a lot of people have,some customers have that little allergy cough they just can't shake,have the boys today hope I'm feeling decent,at least I know it's not booze induced lethargy tho thank heaven,wishes for a grand AF day for all!

[lifechange]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi Nesters,

so I arrived yesterday in the town of the symposium.. to a down pour of rain. I spent the evening in the sweet little flat, relaxing and enjoying the peace and quiet. Went to bed early and around midnight woke up in a fever sweat, then spent the rest of the night going between burning and freezing cold. I could get out of bed around 12 and now at 5:30, I'm feeling a bit better. I have a huge fever blister and am not thinking I'll be fit to go to the second day tomorrow either. Which is such a bummer. I knew I was doing too much and I think the flight/getting soaked/colder temps just pushed me over the edge.

I'm glad to hear you're feeling better, Ava..
Pauly, I hope your hay fever symptoms will subside..
Here's to not drinking at people.. Slo, sorry to hear about your mom. Even though you can make rational sense of it, it still hurts. I do believe as Ava said, that those difficult relationships can become more manageable with more sobriety. I know that my relationship with my ex has improved considerably, mostly because I can take distance when necessary and feel (more) in control with my emotions. I know it's more difficult with the life long parental relationships..:hug:

Hope everyone is having a nice Sunday..xx

[Rava]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good Sunday afternoon nesters. I am relaxing today after a busy day with the grandson and family birthday party. I took diet peach tea with me so I was already prepared in advance to not drink. Sounds like more than a few of us have mother problems. I had a bad convo with mine a little while ago and was tempted to drink. After coming here and seeing that I would be drinking AT her which is ridiculous. She will not change but I can change the way I deal with her. UGH. I am too freaking old for this. She is in her 80’s and still controlling my thoughts and causing issues. I will not drink today and that is that. Hope everyone has a great rest of the day.

[available]

Re: Newbies Nest

Morning nesters

Woke up to ice on my windscreen and nice and chilly. Here i was thinking we were warming up but the weekend was quite lovely and i was very productive.

Yes Pauly, snooker is played on a bigger table than a pool table, it takes up a lot of space but we love it. I love it more when i beat the SO. :congratulatory: My fur baby maddison doesnt like the noise so puts herself to bed.

Slo, my mum is 82 in December. We went to visit her last weekend and she is on about xmas though this time she gave me the option of coming to see her over a 3 day period instead of demanding that i make it on xmas day which would have been impossible since i have my 4 children near me and she lives 2+ hours away. This option is much more doable than me getting anxious about letting everyone down to please her. I do hope that after our tolerating each other for years that her final years we can get closer but i am still very wary.

Sorry to hear you are sick LC. I think i wore myself down also and it started a few months ago. Take care of yourself and you too Pauly. I used to suffer hayfever/sinus something awful until i fell pregnant with my first and for 31 years it has been great. Now theres an option you can try ha ha.

Well off to catch up on some work. Take care x

[narilly]

Re: Newbies Nest

SLO, sorry about your mom, that sucks. Drinking AT your mom, Ava, I can see that happening, we have probably all done that. I think I drank at everybody sometime.

Rava, you sound great, diet peach tea sounds yummy. My mom is 83 and she is really nice most of the time but still has her moments where she drives me crazy.
Take care of yourself LC. Being sick sucks especially when you are not drinking.

My job is good but ir is stressful and exhausting right now. I have been working 10 hour days and have no energy after I get home to do anything.

Ice on your windscreen? So funny how our seasons are opposite Ava.

Byrdie-nice cookies!
Lav, glad you were able to enjoy the dogs. I have two daschunds and love them so much. They are lucky I am sober, I think I am a much better dog owner now. I remember running to the bathroom to throw up when I was drinking and my dog was running wth me, she loved me so much, and I puked 1/2 in the toilet and 1/2 on my dog. Gross!

Paula, it’s super smoky here too, fire fire everywhere.

Have a great sober Sunday everyone! Hello Pav:heartbeat: