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    Re: Newbies Nest

    Hi Nesters!

    Quick fly by for me before I fall into bed. Yes, Slo, I'm feeling a bit less tired.. but that's 'cause I go to bed every night at 9 and sleep until 630! I'm sacrificing all of my "me" time at the moment.. hopefully another week or two and we'll be fit as fiddles!

    Welcome Home, Byrdie!! Gosh, you've been through such a lot the past couple of weeks.. I hope you're able to relax, come down a bit now. Big hugs..

    Pav, big hugs to you, too! I can imagine how bittersweet it must be to have the kids move on to University, or whatever the next stage in their lives might be. I hope your son will prove to be good at keeping in touch! How far away is he? .. Good luck with finding the right words/tone with regards to the feedback at work.

    Have a wonderful vacation, Wags!
    Great to see you, Nar!! I've missed you here..

    Hugs to you all! Kensho, Pauly, G-man, NS, Rava, Mywayin, Ava, Belle (how are you??) and anyone I may have missed..
    Wishing everyone a lovely (or at least manageable) Thursday/Friday!xx
    Last edited by lifechange; September 20, 2018, 01:34 PM.

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      Re: Newbies Nest

      Hey all!
      What a day. This job!
      Slo, I had a troubled childhood, too. Visiting my hometown stirred up all those emotions I have worked very hard to bury. I’m trying to sort through everything. My coping skills are much better than they used to he. Drinking at it wont change it. Hugs to you.
      I am looking forward to the weekend.
      Do whatever it takes to stay sober. Byrdie
      All you gotta do, is get thru this day. AF 1/20/2011
      Tool Box
      Newbie's Nest

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        Re: Newbies Nest

        Good evening Nesters,

        I had a decent today & even got to meet my grandsons after schol & bring them here for dinner & homework. One of their parents will be here to pick them up soon, I hope, ha ha!

        Pav, good luck with the coworker, touchy stuff.
        I found in Radical Forgiveness that I needed to go back (way back) & forgive everyone who wronged me in some way or manner. Forgiving them does not mean excusing them or making light of thier actions. In my case it was an abusive father, the mean ass nuns in school, friends who turned out not to be great friends, husband & other assorted individuals. Apparently they were all doing the best they could at the time but they did leave some lasting damage in their wake. The worksheets I mentioned helped a lot in processing all this

        LC, I only wish I could sleep like a normal person. Insomnia has been a problem for me for as long as I can remember. My mind is calm, I listen to guided meditations & all that, I just can’t stay asleep, oh well. I hope you are feeling in tip top shape very soon.

        Byrdie, I hope you have found your home in good shape & have power & all that :hug:

        Hello to all & wishing a safe night in the nest for all!

        Lav
        Last edited by Lavande; September 20, 2018, 06:41 PM.
        AF since 03/26/09
        NF since 05/19/09
        Success comes one day at a time :thumbs:

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          Re: Newbies Nest

          Hi everyone! It has been a long time since I have checked in. I am happy to say I’m just over eight months sober. I’ve just been busy with school and life. As the months go on I forget that I did drink. I’m so much more settled within myself and not wasting way to much time hungover or numb. I always talk about my little girl who is 5 3/4 (3/4 is very important to her I can’t imagine being drunk around her now. Anyway! I was thinking of this healing place and wanted to say hi to everyone working hard at being sober.
          AF January 7, 2018

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            Re: Newbies Nest

            Choices, thanks for checking in and letting us know that you’re having great success with eight months solid of no drinking! It is encouraging for all of us.

            Pav, for some reason I don’t feel guilty about becoming alcohol-addicted, despite the very bad behavior that it brought. I feel sad, mad, & scared about it, but not guilty.

            Byrdie, I’m aware that you had a troubled childhood, and so were facing so much more than a hurricane and meeting up with former classmates. But you faced it head on and with the support of your siblings by visiting the doctor’s old clinic, revisiting your childhood home, and meeting the surprise half siblings. Your emotions have to be very stirred up after that though!

            Lav, thanks for the book recommendation. I’m going to do it. At least he offers a concrete method for how to do it instead of just saying that you should release old emotions, but with no advice on how to go about it. I need to so that they don’t mess with my sobriety.
            Last edited by Slo; September 21, 2018, 07:43 AM.
            Once a pickle, never a cucumber again.

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              Re: Newbies Nest

              I have been lurking for a few weeks now and at the encouragement of [MENTION=21602]abcowboy[/MENTION], I’m posting back on the nest for support. I think I’m starting to feel like a serial quitter and thinking that maybe I would not be welcomed to keep chatting in this group, thus my absence. I have had surgery a few weeks ago which I thought was going to be minor and it turned out to be very major. I am slowly getting back to normal but this setback which included 4 days of OxyContin followed by a few drinks was a real set back. My emotional strength was challenged. This surgery is a total excuse for me having a few drinks and I fully admit to that. I also feel that lack of structure has been a big problem in the last few weeks. I have to rest so thoughts of alcohol are prevalent in my mind starting in the late afternoon. I am looking forward to returning to work in a few weeks and getting my somewhat normal life back. (Although even in that life I want to drink also). I have been sober for long periods of time so I know that I can do this and have the ability to do so. I just have to get my head in the right zone and do it! Thanks for listening and being here. I did not drink yesterday and do not plan on drinking this weekend either. Small steps.....

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                Re: Newbies Nest

                Hi, All:

                Rava - I'm sorry your small surgery turned into something big. I always wondered what I would tell the doctor in that case - OxyContin or not. I know you know this, but you'll heal more quickly, both physically AND mentally, without the grog. This site is called My Way Out - we all have different paths. Just don't forget your goal, and ask us for support. You got this, Rava!

                Slo, I'm not sure guilty is correct for me, either. I feel shame more. That sounds like an intense word, but basically I have trouble figuring out where I went wrong, or where I could have been stronger. Or where I could have stepped in and helped myself earlier. But I'm much better than I was 4+ years ago, that is for sure.

                LC, my son is only 4 hours away, so he'll be home for Thanksgiving. I'm so excited for him it is hard to be sad, but I do miss him. This makes me wonder where [MENTION=3200]Belle[/MENTION] is??

                Byrdie - facing your childhood demons in the midst of a hurricane was brave. Enjoy your weekend.

                Lav - thanks.

                Take care of yourselves and don't drink, no matter what!
                Pav

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                  Re: Newbies Nest

                  TGIF, Nesters!

                  I am having a lazy evening.. cooked some soup for the fam and am watching Netflix until I go to bed.

                  Just wanted to say how happy I am that you're back in the Nest, [MENTION=24196]Rava[/MENTION]. Love and strength to you during this time of healing. As you said, baby steps. All you need to think about is today..:hug:

                  Hugs to you all and see you tomorrow.. Looking forward to a long and restful Un-hung Saturday!

                  Comment


                    Re: Newbies Nest

                    Vim and Vigor have left the building. I'm beat. I am just going thru the motions today at work. One of my project managers smarted off at me and I told him that I was so busy doing his job I didn't have time for my own. Copied his boss, too. Yes, we ARE in 3rd grade again. Lord help me not choke somebody.

                    I had to go to the doc this morning for fasting labs for my physical next week. While our home was spared, the whole community seems to be broken. People trying to cover holes in roofs best they can. Yard debris everywhere, trees down. Furniture and carpeting pulled out to the curbside. It's heartbreaking. Many are still evacuated and can't get back in yet, I know they must be running on fumes. If they are staying in a hotel, my heart goes out further, heck my bill was over $1000. I am considering myself very lucky. Yes, gratitude in all this.

                    As Available would say, TFIF! But still, not a ticket to BoozeVille!
                    Great to see you, Rava. If they kicked us out for being a serial relapser, I wouldn't be here. Your quit will stick! Hugs to you, and to all here. Byrdie
                    All you gotta do, is get thru this day. AF 1/20/2011
                    Tool Box
                    Newbie's Nest

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                      Re: Newbies Nest

                      Hola nesters!

                      Rava, not so fast taking the serial relapser trophy. A real contender right here! Great to see u.

                      Byrdy. Wow and sheesh! are my responses to your work colleagues and local community situation. I hope you're okay after such a big trip. You are a bona fide raawk star my friend. Hope you have a nice weekend even amongst the chaos.

                      Yo Choices! Congratulations on 8 months. Wowza!

                      A quick recap.......Choices = raawk star. Pav = raawk star. LC = raawk star. Byrdy = raawk star. Slo = raawk star. Lav = raawk star. Ava = raawk star. Rava = raawk star. KkKensho = raawk star. Wags = raawk star. Who else we got? NS = raawk star. Narilly = raawk star. Jane 27 = raawk star. I'm gonna be here all day! You/we are all raawk stars here. Turning up for ourselves is proof.

                      The weekend ain't no ticket to no freakin boozeville see.

                      Always above the clouds are blue skies.
                      Last edited by Guitarista; September 21, 2018, 04:00 PM.

                      'I am part of all that I have met, yet all experience is an arch wherethro', gleams that untravelled world whose margins fade, forever and forever when I move'

                      Zen soul Warrior. Freedom today-

                      Comment


                        Re: Newbies Nest

                        Hi everyone! Or I should say Ciao a tutti!!!

                        We had easy flights and trains so far and have already seen some beautiful and diverse terrain, from glaciated peaks to mediterranean lakes lined with palms. Tomorrow we hope to catch two trains that will eventually get us to Venice. I say hope, because some of the ticketing systems are a bit hard to figure out, but fingers crossed we'll have seats and make our connection with no problem

                        Today was a special scenic train, during which we had lovely seatmates from Switzerland - an elderly couple who were taking the same tourist excursion we were. We got lots of inside knowledge about Switzerland shared with us as we headed south toward the border with Italy. Of course since it was a tourist excursion and not just a regular train, there was a guy who brought a food and drink cart down the aisle, and he was quite a showman. He sweet talked a lot of people into buying alcoholic drinks, including my travel companion and the gentleman in the couple we sat with. The cart guy pressured me, "oh, come on, you're on holiday..." and then tried to shame me by saying a few things that suggested I'm weird or boring because I didn't want to drink. But hooray for me - I held my ground.

                        I've had plans in my mind for the wine drinking etc that I know will come up with my bicycling companions, but this train this was something I wasn't prepared for. I got through it, but I realized I need an "excuse" in my pocket for just such occasions. The old, "I have a health issue..." or "I can't mix alcohol with some of the meds I'm taking" or something.

                        I didn't really like it today, but I'm so glad I didn't cave to pressure. In the past I probably wouldn't have done so well, but I'm sitting here now feeling nothing but proud of myself.

                        I'm only online for a few mins but wanted to share this story while it was fresh. I'll read back and catch up with everyone soon - hopefully this weekend. Hope you all have good weekends yourselves!
                        Toolbox/Toolkit

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                          Re: Newbies Nest

                          morning nesters

                          Great work choices on 8 months. life really does get better.

                          Rava great to see you back. My motto when i gave up drinking was that Rome was not built in a day and neither is sobriety. As Byrd says if they kicked out relapsers this site would be very very quiet. One day at a time girl and i hope you continue to heal quickly from your surgery.

                          i got home from work yesterday and after banning al in my house my son and his friend had a beer in front of them. well to say i was impressed was beyond words and they were told that they dont bring al into my house when i am home as they f#cked it the weekend before with their drunkeness and keeping me awake. so last night they went to the pub and came home pissed, f#cked the front door lock somehow and woke me up. i just lost it (the yelling with the funny voice lost it), apparently this was my fault the door was stuffed and two pissed people with a tiny screw driver were trying to fix it for ME. As my girls tell people "do not wake the dragon when she is asleep" and they did. I really think my tolerance for drunk people is zero now and i just look at my son and think "why". they wont remember what i said they will only remember blah blah blah and it being my fault. I am grateful beyond words that it is not me now trying to justify my actions and there will be more words but i'm tired of his behaviour. I do know he wont be looking forward to having a chat sober but he makes the choices on his actions and behaviour as i do. Just ranting today.

                          Well now i am off to the SO's for the weekend. the sun is shining and going to be a beautiful day.

                          Take care xx
                          AF free 1st December 2013 - 1st December 2022 - 9 years of freedom

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                            Re: Newbies Nest

                            Thanks to everyone that gave me words of encouragement. I was actually just sitting here recooperating and Birdies comment came to me that its “Just Friday Night, It’s not a ticket to BoozeVille. “ I like that statement. Made me check in. Hope everyone has a great evening. I will not be drinking tonight. Small steps continue.

                            Comment


                              Re: Newbies Nest

                              Good evening Nesters,

                              It's great to see you back Rava & I hope you recover from your surgery quickly!
                              It's always better to be here than not, right? Keep checking in with us.

                              Choices, Congrats to you on your 8 AF months, Yay for you!
                              Are you still taking classes?

                              Wags, I can just hear that guy on the train, haha!
                              I discovered an 'automatic No Thanks' after a period of time & I think you have as well
                              No need to give excuses either ~ remember that!

                              Byrdie, I'm prepared to send the Stella collective to take care of anyone bothering you from work. Just say the word, Lol
                              Please take care of yourself.

                              G, last week you said I was badass - this week I raawk, thank you

                              Ava, no, I would not be happy with drunken sons waking me up either. I hope you have a peaceful weekend!

                              We are finally starting to experience a bit of a weather change around these parts. It's been an incredibly hot & humid & rainy summer. Personally I am glad to see it go.
                              Wishing everyone a safe night in the nest!

                              Lav
                              Last edited by Lavande; September 21, 2018, 07:37 PM.
                              AF since 03/26/09
                              NF since 05/19/09
                              Success comes one day at a time :thumbs:

                              Comment


                                Re: Newbies Nest

                                Hi Nest. Glad to see so many great posts. RAVA, don’t ever feel like you don’t belong here.
                                Wags, rocked the train... dig your out your excuses! Thanks for checking in!
                                Byrdie, it must be traumatic there. Sorry for that and for your incompetent colleagues!
                                AVA, I have so much trouble respecting people who just want to get f’d up - maybe because they don’t seem to respect themselves and those around them? I was that person; I should have more tolerance.
                                G, hi buddy.
                                PAV you have a good attitude about your son. Lend it to me in about 6 years?
                                Have to get up at the crack tomorrow to take my son to a swim meet, so I’m closing my eyes now. To everyone... thank you for being here.
                                Kensho

                                Done. Moving on to life.

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