Newbies Nest

[KENSHO]

Re: Newbies Nest

LC I found them!! PM me and I’ll send them to you!

[abcowboy]

My therapist put it this way - for one reason or another, I am vulnerable to addiction. Genetics? Personality? Brain chemistry? I stopped looking for the reason a long time ago, as I didn't find that quest useful. I WAS expecting rainbows and unicorns when I quit drinking, and I was a little disconcerted when life continued to be lifey, even with no booze in it. BUT, how wonderful is it to be able to deal with all that crap without a hangover. I am present for it all in a way I wasn't before.

Well put Pav! Explains alcoholism and sobriety in a nutshell!

[lifechange]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good evening Nesters,
8pm and past my bedtime! Still have to fit in a game of cribbage with my youngest. In our jammies and listening to some good music.
I'm so looking forward to a good sleep!
Tonight is one without cats in my room.. will write more in the morning.:love:

[Guitarista]

Re: Newbies Nest

G-man, you're sounding on top of the world.. horseback riding is a great idea! I'm going to go for a ride in the desert when I'm home next month. So true, what you said with regards to biology and chemistry. If I'm drinking I'm certainly not taking care of myself.. It got to the point where my body couldn't handle the alcohol I was pouring into it at all.. my tolerance went down and I was feeling physically sick and having black outs more and more often. And then compounded with the guilt of what I was doing to myself. That is such a scary world to live in. Are you still eating your mostly plant based diet?

Yo Lunatic LC! Yes, you betcha i am. Organic plant strong and have found multi grain gluten free bread (i like sandwiches as they're easy and filling). Some fish a few days a week. No dairy, wheat or refined sugar knowingly (makes me puffy around the eyes, but also some reported health benefits by avoiding these). I've ditched the cookies and small cakes/snacks, mars bars, cherry ripes and other processed food snacks like my formerly beloved stick of cabana to munch on whilst shopping. I've read processed meats are carcinogens, bacon being one on a World health organisation study (don't have a link but the research is out there). Getting my sweet fix from fruit. I tell ya, nothing as sweet and indulgent as the fresh organic strawberries, pears, watermelon or bananas i was scoffing down yesterday. After that experience, i thought to myself....'i just cannot understand why anyone would eat candy anymore, when if we want a sweet fix, then here it is!' But i'm still searching for a gluten free, low sugar, mud cake! I know they're out there. I'm not totally hardcore health though. I love the BBQ'd fish sandwiches they make at a local market. Turkish bread with gluten, processed chilli sauce, non organic lettuce and lemon, but it tastes so good and it's a little event for me once a week. My thinking is that my immune system must be getting stronger all the time as i eliminate many of the regular poisons, so i should be able to handle such extravagance! I'm still learning about healthy eating, so take what i say with a grain of (pink himalayan) salt. Have a great weekend raaawker.

Rava.....Oh yeah!

WAGS, that’s so frustrating about having your ideas shared. I DO have a clause in my contract that states exactly what you said and I review it before the project starts. It’s still not going to prevent anyone from stealing it and I know that I’M not going to take someone to court over it... but it makes it REALLY clear. I also tend to tell myself that if someone is going to try to use the designs I’ve given them without me, they still won’t have ME... and the part I offer during implementation, based on my 15+ years of experience. And if they need something i designed THAT badly then kudos to me, shame on them, and they may as well have it. I’m not sure how your work goes, but I offer much more that just a template.

Wags. I agree with what friend Kensho is saying in principle, without knowing any detail. You offer more than just a template. Personal touch and flavour is the difference. 'Customer service'. The people who care and follow through with quality work, care and attention always stand out! AND.......We can't be attached to what others do or don't do. Non attachment. We can't control that stuff, as we all know. I have no doubt your work stands on it's own, and speaks for itself.

The feeling's good and strong here. lot's of hope, relative peace, relative happiness, and healthy action. Off to ride a horse to who knows where today. Followed by a regular sunday gig. Reckon i'll go skydiving next. I love your post Kensho about the benefits of sobriety. You truly have become an award winning Raaaawk star!

Wishing all a happy and peaceful weekend.

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good evening Nesters,

Had a pretty good day but I'm definitely not going sky diving G, ha ha! I don't think my granny bones would like that very much. Speaking of bones, my diet is a lot like yours, more alkaline which is better for strong bone regrowth as we age

Wags, very sorry about that student behavior. I learned a lot about intellectual property 15 years ago when I opened my embroidery biz. I purchase digitized designs with a license to use them as stated. I can not share those designs with anyone or claim them as my own. I totally get it, it's not a problem. Everyone is out there trying to make a living, stealing shouldn't be part of the program, right? Maybe you can question the student further & let him/her know they could be terminated from your service. Don't let anyone walk over you. Stand up for yourself & what you know is right :hug:

LC, I hope you are getting some decent sleep. Cats are annoying, my dog doesn't bother me all night, LOL

Hello to Pav, Kensho, cowboy, Byrdie , Rava & everyone.
Wishing a safe night in the nest for all!

Lav

[Slo]

Re: Newbies Nest

Rava, I like that Byrdie’s “Friday is just another day, not a ticket to Boozeville” is working as a mantra for you! Like [MENTION=17650]paulywogg[/MENTION] said, you never know when something someone says will be just what you needed to hear for a deterrent, as happened to her in the Steppers thread.

Wagmor, I’m so sorry that you have to deal with all of those uncomfortable feelings like anger because of that betrayal. And good point that culturally women were discouraged from being able to feel & show anger in that era. I would definitely put that paragraph into your agreement statement, and verbally go over it with new clients as well.

Hope you’re getting a good night’s sleep, LC. I couldn’t sleep well for a couple nights and now have a sore throat. Our cat is quiet all night and snuggles in next to me on cold nights! Plus he stays quiet until we wake up first.

Pavati, yeah the poor people afflicted with dementia can be very stubborn. My MIL was such a nice lady, (and stuffed all of her anger, being from that generation!), but she was so stubborn & difficult with dementia. Good job on not drinking after that (seeing as you don’t drink!), and finding other ways to rebalance.

I have a high school swim banquet to attend tomorrow, and lucky for me whoever planned it set it up as a brunch instead of a dinner —with no alcohol involved this time! Such a nice change. I’m feeling down and just don’t feel like dealing with it.

Goodnight to Kensho, G, Lav, Narilly, Ava, NS, Cowboy & all too!

[available]

Re: Newbies Nest

afternoon nesters

well i have had lots of naps this weekend and thoroughly enjoyed each one. i went and bought two lawn mowers as the boys broke the next door neighbours so it was basically 2 for the price of 1 and i managed to nag and get my lawns mowed. this morning i went to a craft shop and bought something to make for my girls for xmas, only due to the fact i see them next weekend and i could not rely on a delivery by then. the weather has cooled down so i am happy with that. oh and i went to the op shop and bought another dress!

Yes Pav, i am definitely vulnerable to addiction as are two of my children, sadly. as my mother says alcoholism comes from the "Fowler" side of the family whoever they are! I know i just cant have one. if i had one i'd eventually end up with the bottle next to me, the viking goblet, a bottle in the fridge and one hidden, just in case. I dont want those mind games again, i can live without that one!

G how did the horse riding go, gee sorry i didnt respond before , horsed dont have breaks or a steering wheel so they arent my thing, even growing up in the country when i was young, i could not get into them. I hope you enjoyed it though. now llamas i could quite happily pat if they didnt spit on me.

Wags, i would definitely be pissed off as well. I find i am quick to feeling like that at the moment but blaming it on menopause, blaming lots on that actually ha ha. why cant people just be decent, nice human beings, its not rocket science. I hope you sort it out and find a nice appreciative person to take her place.

Going up to Target shortly, need to get the xmas supply of jocks and socks for the boys. i figure at 5pm there should hardly be anyone around and if so i will come home.

take care xx

[lifechange]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi Nesters!

Finally settling down on the sofa at 11:45 after a nice, long Sunday morning snuggle with the girls and the cats.. who are on my good side again!:happy2:
Slo, you hit the jackpot with your cat! I've never heard of one who stays quiet until you get up.. are you sure you don't get up at 4:45? That I could imagine.. I'm sorry you're feeling down and hope that will improve soon.. I just got over a cough and sore throat. I was so afraid it would turn into more.. lots of sage and thyme "tea" and lavender oil on the chest.. and warm feet! Did the trick so far, knock on wood!

Wags, that sounds completely out of line and I think anyone in your situation would be upset/angry. I would also add a clause, as Kensho has, and state it up front from the get go. And I think I would confront this woman as well.. Pretend like you're in Germany.. here it would definitely be talked about openly.. "I was wondering why you would be sending a file of my work to... anyone, actually?".. she can't deny that she sent it. I hope you find a solution you're happy with.

Pav, that is so true! There are so many different factors that go into why WE become addicted to alcohol.. and the why's don't actually matter, as there's no going back and changing it. It's not a relationship where we get a second chance... to "do it right". So the best thing we can do is accept our situation, our relationship for what it is, and make the changes necessary to move forward. I like you said about life being lifey.. it sure is.

I'm pretty happy to put everything on the back burner right now. It feels so good to be out again with all of you. My heart feels lighter and I can focus on the really important things like being present for the girls, doing my best at work, being there for my friends, remembering what people say, not accepting invitations if it's all too much instead of having to cancel, feeling my body as a solid presence again instead of numbing.. my brain is still a bit foggy, but it's getting better.

Tomorrow, I'll be the most excited about celebrating Kensho's 1 year anniversary because she's done the work!! Wasn't afraid to show her struggles and question a lot and accept support, and in doing so, found her way out!
Second I'm excited that it's my 49th birthday and 7 days af.. I put a lot of stress on myself these past few months because I wanted to have a certain amount of af time going into this new year..I'm sure it's quite normal to want to tie up a lot of loose ends, get in perfect shape physically and mentally, be able to "show" what's been accomplished before turning 50..? I don't know. It seems really dumb now.. and I'm just happy to be where I am, feeling really strong and supported, all at the same time.

Wishing everyone a relaxing Sunday.. or a crazy one if you're out doing shopping!xx

[Rava]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good morning Nesters and Happy birthday LC! You are doing great. Life is so much easier without alcohol. I am sick and tired of it consuming all of my free time in both my thoughts and actions. Taking it off the table is actually quite freeing in so many ways. I love the fact that someone said “if just one why not none”. Thats so true. Moderation is stupid. We are all here because we cant drink just one. What’s the point. One doesnt even do anything. I might as well drink one glass of water. Sorry about your student Wags. Thats pretty damned shady. Wishing everyone a great Sunday. I spent the day baking cookies with the grands yesterday. That wore me out! LOL. Hi to Pav, Lav, Ava, G man, Slo, Kensho and everyone else. I am just starting to figure out who is who. I am terrible at that!

[Jude58]

Re: Newbies Nest

Happy birthday LC! Your most precious gift is the one that you give yourself....sobriety. :balloons:

[abcowboy]

LC!

[lifechange]

Re: Newbies Nest

Thanks Guys! But it's actually tomorrow!!:happy2:

[abcowboy]

Well then [MENTION=15430]lifechange[/MENTION], aren't you the lucky one, 2 cakes!!

[wagmor]

Re: Newbies Nest

.......We can't be attached to what others do or don't do. Non attachment. We can't control that stuff, as we all know.

So true G-ster! This is definitely another thing on my short list of "stuff" to work on within myself. I've come a long way with not taking things personally and not being attached to outcomes, but hadn't necessarily seen that angle on this situation, so :thanks: for pointing that out in such a supportive way. You sound fantastic, like your new lifestyle is working wonders for you. So proud of you!!!

[wagmor]

Re: Newbies Nest

Thanks all for your support and advice. I will be talking with said student today, and will definitely be adding the "don't steal my sh1t!!!" paragraph to my client agreement.

LC - your morning sounds lovely. Congrats on 49 years of living and 7 days AF - two big celebrations!!!

Rava - I didn't know they still did the whole star-spangled banner thing any more! And yes - taking al totally off the table is really the way to go. This stance has saved me many a time, and for sure just one drink not only doesn't sound appealing, it would do nothing and if I'm being honest would never happen for me anyway. Glad you had such a great day with your grandkids.

Ava - yep, I blame a helluva lot on menopause these days. I'm in the early stages and I'm already ready to be done with the whole thing!

Kensho - thank you for sharing your approach to intellectual property. And yes - even if this student shared my work no other provider would be able to bring the added value that makes that work come alive. I'm talking with the student today and hope to clear the air and lay down better boundaries. AND... Congrats on 1 year!!! Speech speech


Hellos and waves to Lav, Slo, Cowboy, Pav, Byrdie and everyone else stopping by the nest today.