Newbies Nest

[Slo]

Re: Newbies Nest

like us all you finally realised that unless the hard work and dedication was put in the cycle would never end.

I liked what you said here, Ava. This really is the truth: it takes hard work and DEDICATION to achieve this.
I guess this is what Byrdie means by differentiating between a plan as opposed to a wish or a goal.
Thanks for posting your plan, Byrdie. Now I understand better what is involved in a “plan”.

Appreciated your wise words too as you celebrated a year, Kensho; and to know that your work & dedication over the year feels worth it!

Yes, Pav, one major wrench in the works throws the whole schedule off. It’s hard to be in the thick of the sandwich generation. Glad you found a way to catch up a little.

Ava, so sweet that you’re sensitive to your sick dog’s needs.

Narilly, funny (although sad & true too) that you tried to moderate for 25 years! That about says it. Once it’s gone (the ability to moderate) it’s permanently gone, for some strange reason.

Welcome, 3 bottles! So glad to have you here.
Hello to NS, Rava, G-man, Lav, Wagmor, Feebee, LC & all as well!

[lifechange]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good Morning Nesters,
on my way to work.. just wanted to wish everyone a nice Thursday.
I'm so looking forward to the weekend! and especially to next weekend, which will be the beginning of a 10 day break..
Ava, enjoy your time off! hope your last day wasn't too stressful..
Hugs to everyone stopping or flying by today..
xx

[Rava]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good morning nesters and welcome 3B’s. Its always good to get another person in here . Byrdie’s advice is so spot on. Awesome post Byrdie!! Today is day 14 of the 30 day experiment for me from the Naked Mind Book. This is helping me so much because of the journal entries and daily support and videos. This is exactly what I need to stay focused. This site is also amazing. Rational recovery helped initially but I realized that I needed more structure to my quit. Hope everyone has a good day today. Thanks everyone for all the words of wisdom and support. My life is so much better than it was 2 weeks ago. No more brain chatter = freedom!

[wagmor]

Re: Newbies Nest

Ava - Fingers and paws crossed that you get the rescue pup! And thanks for asking about my client - I was just about to post an update. I did end up talking with her, and it actually went as well as I could have ever dreamed - actually better! It sounds like it was mostly a huge misunderstanding that started with a technology glitch (the messaging function within a particular app on her phone coupled with on-going difficulties at getting files to attach correctly, which I can attest to) on her end, which she exacerbated by then being cryptic when she didn't tell me why the message with the file had ever been sent. She nearly tripped over herself apologizing and I believe she's being honest and sincere. We met for another teaching session, and within the next day she went online and posted a rave review for me and my work.

I'm so glad I addressed things directly with her though, and I would never have had the clear head or the courage to do so while drinking. I would have instead cut ties with her and spent a lot of time brooding or similar. There is just no good side to al.


Lav - I agree with the others, sounds like time for you to get a pup too

LC - glad you got the computer stuff working again, and that you enjoyed your eve at Fiddler with your girls. I have fond childhood memories of seeing that with my family and can still hear most of the songs in my head.

Pav - hope your mental health day helped, and good for you on taking one!


Hellos and waves to everyone stopping by ye olde neste today Hope you all have fantastic days and eves!

[lifechange]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi again!
Evening check-in..
Rava, you sound great! I'm glad you're rid of the brain chatter.. well done on 2 weeks!
Wags, very positive outcome with your client! Here's to open and honest communtication.. and courage!
I'm busy helping my youngest bake brownies and clean her room.. 6 friends are coming tomorrow after bowling for a sleep-over.. 14 year old birthday party! should be fun..:happy2:
I'm happy to be at the end of day 10.. back in the double digits.
I haven't had any real cravings yet.. just some short temperedness and exhaustion.
so, off to bed! see you all tomorrow..xx

[lifechange]

Re: Newbies Nest

Just read this from Today's gift.. Love it!

Do, or do not. There is no "try."
--Yoda, in The Empire Strikes Back

Trying is what we do when we aren't willing to make a commitment. We say, "I'll try," when our heart isn't ready to give a full effort. It's what we say when we can't admit that our resolve is wimpy. And it's the lie that will defeat us.

Some challenges we face can't be conquered simply by saying, "I will do it." But we can choose to do something that will help. We can't move the mountain but we can pick up some rocks. We can engage with the problem and get to know it better. Every action we take leads somewhere and sets us up for the next action. We even learn from our mistakes and that moves us closer to achieving our goal.

Today I will not just "try"; I will do something to move toward my goal.

[available]

Re: Newbies Nest

morning nesters

Slo, i am still dedicated to this sobriety, i have to be as i know what i am like left to my own devices but it does get so much easier with time.

Rava, glad the mind feck has stopped but be vigilant as that al voice can raise its awful head at any time. i sometimes get a quiet whisper but have the tools to tell it where to go and focus on something that makes my life much more pleasant.

LC so glad it is you with teenage girls, i still shudder at the memory of mine sometimes. lucky they grew out of the hormones and are lovely people. now its me with the hormones and i hope they will still love me at the end! great work on day 10 and for posting each and every day.

Wags, i am glad your chat went well and its all sorted, yes i understand you with those thoughts if you were drinking. i held grudges forever and ever when i was a drunk. now i get quick to anger but let it go just as fast, well mostly. ummm sometimes yep!

nice and pleasant in Melbourne atm with some much needed rain. my last day of work today and i forgot to set my alarm. i wondered why the birds woke me at 4.15 when it was 5.25am. damn i moved quick but got to work at 6am and no one here. not sure why i panicked as i plan on doing nothing much. ive not heard about the puppy but i suppose they have a process to go through. my mads is not well again today which worries me that she is going to drop off the perch at any minute but i know she wont or i hope she wont.

take care xx

[Byrdlady]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good grief, this job! I was going to take tomorrow if but that isn’t working out.
Nothing much to report here. Another day, another dollar. Byrdie

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good evening Nesters,

Glad to see your positive check ins
Every day AF gets us closer to the life we all deserve to live.

Ava, hope your pup is OK :hug:

Just busy taking care of stuff today, nothing special.

Byrdie, thinking about you!

Wishing everyone a safe night in the nest!

Lav

[Slo]

Re: Newbies Nest

Trying is what we do when we aren't willing to make a commitment. We say, "I'll try," when our heart isn't ready to give a full effort. It's what we say when we can't admit that our resolve is wimpy. And it's the lie that will defeat us.[/COLOR]

I love this too, LC! Conquering this really does take some resolve.

I also loved hearing the happy ending to your upset, [MENTION=23208]wagmor[/MENTION], and especially how you would likely have not handled it well if you were still drinking, with a resulting negative outcome!

Rava, you are really doing this now! You got past Byrdie’s “day 13”! I’m glad you found daily structured support that works for you for the first 30 days.

Good luck with the party, LC! Fun, but can be hard when you’re exhausted & short-tempered. But you’ll be surrounded by youthful energy, and at 14 they mostly just need background supervision.

I have a Christmas Open House to attend tomorrow. Only three hours, so I can do it! I don’t think I’ll know many people there though, and am going with my HB who I’m angry with, so could be awkward & feel long...the sort of thing I used to handle of course by drinking a lot and numbing myself through it! But, not a long event, and good practice for the sober muscles.

Disappointing that you can’t have your three-day weekend, Byrdie.

Goodnight!

[Rava]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good morning Nesters! Another weekend ahead. These are my hardest times. Friday - Sunday Night. Since this is my 3rd weekend sober it helps somewhat. We have a Christmas cocktail party tomorrow night. I feel confident that I will be sipping flavored water. I do NOT want to start another day 1. That is just too damned hard. So headed into the weekend with positive vibes. Hope everyone has a great weekend.

[lifechange]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi Nesters!
I'm right on your heels, Rava! Heading into the weekend with positive vibes. I remember, in the past, it sometimes helped me to think about what day I'd be on Monday, how good I'd be feeling, ready to take on the week.. instead of having to deal with the dread of starting again.. which on average took me a good month. To get another day 1, I mean..
So I'll be happy to be celebrating 2 weeks af on Monday.. how the time flies..

Off to bowl a bit.. I'll check back in later to see how everyone is.. Ava, hope you were able to do a whole lot of nothing today at work.. and are now enjoying some time off.. sleep! xx

[Byrdlady]

Re: Newbies Nest

Rava, funny how we all have our toughest times, mine was on Friday afternoons.....that's why you will often see me say, 'It's only Friday, not a ticket to BoozeVille' I'm giving myself a pep talk in those words! After a week of fighting customers and coworkers, I seem to have a sense of entitlement....to escape. My bubble baths have become a very important tool in helping me transition from work to home (working from home is the best AND the worst). Wishing you strength as you navigate the weekend! Byrdie

[Rava]

Re: Newbies Nest

Thanks Byrdie, Your BoozeVille statement is my friday mantra! LOL

[Pavati]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi, All:

LC - glad you brought up Yoda - I was going to write that quote also! I do think there is something to be said for changing language to support this work.

Narilly - I'm with you with the 25 year attempt at moderation. I didn't know I was doing it, and there was NO thought that I would quit booze. I remember back in my 20s I was going to a party with a friend and I said "I hope I don't drink too much." She said, "just don't." I was thinking wow, I didn't even know that was a possibility to control when and where that would happen. I didn't get blotto every time I drank, but there were nights when I would dive in and not come up for air. Now I see that as a warning sign, back then I just saw it as a flaw in my approach, so I kept trying to change my approach. Didn't work so well...

I'm so glad I addressed things directly with her though, and I would never have had the clear head or the courage to do so while drinking. I would have instead cut ties with her and spent a lot of time brooding or similar. There is just no good side to al.

Wags - that is one of the amazing things about quitting. There were all these things that I thought were just me, and many of them turned out to be just me while being a drinker. I am so much better at setting and challenging boundaries now. I'm glad that all worked out.

Byrdie - Take care of yourself! That place is too much.

Hiya Lav and everyone else...

I am READY for this Friday for sure. I am looking forward to a weekend with my family, and a big ole 50th Birthday Party. I'll have my dance shoes on and my exit plan in my pocket...

Pav