Newbies Nest

[Pavati]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi, All:

Welcome back, Moffit - and as G says, put that butt velcro on tight so you don't slip out of this nest. This is a good place for support to stay sober. I, too, love teh flavored sparkling water. I make my own with little splashes of various juices, and I also buy a variety to have on hand. It is MUCH cheaper than booze and feels like a treat to me.

Good to see you Belle! I can't imagine walking in on my kid having sex, but I am sure I can't imagine my mom walking in on me when I was a teenager either! Bad all around for both of you...

Change, sounding strong.

Ava! I'm so excited for you - have fun! Two weeks off the smokes is a major milestone. I'm glad you have a plan for tonight. Can't wait to hear about the concert.

LC - I have those thoughts, too. I just had a pretty strong one after a day of dealing with my dad and mom. Wow, did I want a quick escape, and I was surprised when alcohol seemed like an option to me. I pulled the NS and let the thought drift away (which it did pretty quickly), and moved on. Thoughts are not truths.

When I was drinking, I used to justify it every night by saying I "deserved" it after the day I had had... I work at a high school with teenagers, so every day there actually usually was a dramatic event that involved trauma, drama, drugs/alcohol, mental health or SOMETHING, so the truth is that I have a job that is apt to give me stress. When I quit drinking, I knew that I couldn't use alcohol as a go-to, so I switched to ice cream for a time. I remember every Friday night I would stop and get two pints of my favorite, and eat as much as I wanted over the weekend. I actually got to where I ate so much ice cream that it wasn't the "treat" I remembered any more. After I was secure in my quit from alcohol, I went cold turkey on the ice cream, quitting all sweets for a month. It was amazing how programmed my body had become to expect sweets after every meal! Those were some cravings. Now I come and go from the sweets. I can get into a rut, but then I take a month off and re-set, and I'm ok again.

Glad it is warming up for those of you in the middle of the US. I can't imagine that cold.

Happy Sober Friday. Checked my mail, and luckily no tickets to Boozeville were offered.

Pav

[BelleGirl]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good morning, Nesters...from cold-land that I seem to share with Lav and a few others. Snow day off from school...I'm off from work anyway today, so good day to be home and get a start on income taxes. Except that I am so unmotivated lately. I'm sure boyfriend will find some way to come over, even if he has to run shirtless through the woods to see his girl. That is fine, but I DON'T WANT TO SEE ANYTHING ELSE. I am having such a hard time unseeing what I saw a few weeks ago. I will keep my sober presence known in the house today if he does visit.

I can't wait to hear how the concert went also, [MENTION=16186]available[/MENTION]. Great job with the no-smokes. That must be so hard to quit (as if the al isn't bad enough). I watched my dad continue to smoke after a quadruple bypass, then congestive heart failure and COPD. He would toss away his oxygen line just to get a smoke in. The power cigs can have over people is enormous. But I get it. Fortunately I never smoked, but the al showed me just how hard quitting these things can be.

Day 3 here and a Friday...and will probably have teens here and not knowing what to do with myself stuck inside. I really need to get some motivation. And none of this is a reason for boozing. just have to remember that. And it is great to be with people who 'get it' that those AL thoughts are bound to come into our pre-wired heads from time to time. My 'out' (when I managed almost 5 years AL free) would be to follow the thought of drinking to the unevitiable end. I need to get that working again, and figure out why that tactic broke. Perhaps I need a new one. I like the "drift away" idea I saw [MENTION=20191]Pavati[/MENTION] mention. I'll try it!

Have a good day all...(too many to name and I haven't had my second cup of coffee yet).

[Moffit]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good Day Nestlings,
Cleaning house for my peeps arriving today. I hate cleaning, especially vacuuming. Oh, well has to be done.

Hang in there [MENTION=16180]BelleGirl[/MENTION].
Thanks [MENTION=20191]Pavati[/MENTION], butt velcro attached firmly! [MENTION=17650]paulywogg[/MENTION]...Oh those voices..Love to mess with our heads don't they? [MENTION=3075]Change[/MENTION] Well not sure how to make a plan, I have my NA bevy of choice on hand, no booze in the house, have told my visitors I'm no drinking. Anything else I should be doing?

Have a great sober day everyone!
Moffit

[KENSHO]

Re: Newbies Nest

Morning everyone! Thought I'd repost a poem I wrote awhile back about alcohol. Yep, it's been a big enough topic in my life to write poetry about!! Ug! Shout out to everyone choosing to LIVE!!

Red, thick wine
Such promises unkept
Provocative and dangerous
You still flirt with me, except

Numb is not so pleasant
Discord… unappealing
Every time you fill my mouth
I gulp down what you’re stealing

I want to feel alive -
Sip life with senses full
No more fuzz, no more escape
I reject your pull.

[Change]

Re: Newbies Nest

Change[/MENTION] Well not sure how to make a plan, I have my NA bevy of choice on hand, no booze in the house, have told my visitors I'm no drinking. Anything else I should be doing?

Well, that's a good start. Having substitutes is definately good and a reminder to have treats on hand.

Guess i meant plan for the long term, such as listing triggers and 'actions' that you can take.

Eg

Trigger
Anxiety.

Action
Self talk; telling myself it'll be okay; taking time out to consider solutions

Lol

Just my way of thinking i guess.

Woke up this morning with a semi cracker of a headache after another night of disturbed / restless sleep.

Meh, the joys of detox!

[available]

Re: Newbies Nest

morning nesters

Phil was fecking brilliant. my first sober and straight concert of standing and i didnt have to line up in the al queue, didnt have to run outside for a fag and got to enjoy every single minute. My kids were talking to each other which was annoying the crap out of me so i yelled at them to shut the F#ck up and talk tomorrow. ha ha. of course they were drinking and thought they had to out do the crowd of thousands. I have probably been to see phil 8 times over the years and he was as good last night as he was then. i had a tear thinking about all of those past years up till today and how he has been with me all of that time, except when i gave up drinking. Could not listen to phil then as he was my drinking music. I know i wont ever see him again and thats devastating but to see him last night was the best and with my kids (who were not even a thought back in the day) was just pulling every grateful out of my bones. Sadly he didnt ask me to marry him but i did mention to my daughter she could go for his 17 year old son who has all the makings of being a brilliant drummer and piano player. The only bad aspect was that i didnt buy tickets for his last show tonight but at $300 a pop! people were walking past with glasses of wine that would not even wet the sides of this little alkie. $11 for what would have been 2/3 mouthfuls, i told my son he would not have seen any of the concert if i had of been drinking as he would have been at the bar constantly. So, condensing all of the above Phil was fecking brilliant!

LC enjoy your last few days of your holiday. I had to learn that the past is the past and its the present and future that matters. In my early days i remember going to the vets with mads and she was so unwell and had to stay and my first immediate thought was to drink and not pulling into a bottleshop was murder. i spent so much time gripping that steering wheel so it would not turn and self talking. 5+ years later and all of that grit and determination has paid off.

Belle, the fags has not been an easy task and last night was a test but i was able to sit in my seat and use my spray and try not to feel too deprived. Just think, your daughter was probably just as shocked as you were and wont be going back there in a hurry, well not when they think they will be busted thats for sure. Im feeling for you with teenagers. I always thought my kids would never be like "other teenagers" but yep they were. A breed of their own.

Pauly, you wont drink as you dont drink. I love the Sunday shout outs as i remember once a week and thats it until the next and i do enjoy seeing that as a reward on my part. Keep rolling on those days.

Well another hot one here but im going to do nothing but play phil and enjoy the day.

take care xx

[paulywogg]

Re: Newbies Nest

Glad you had such a great time Ava!

[wagmor]

Re: Newbies Nest

Just a quick fly by for me today - I have this eve and then part of tomorrow off and then I have to start prepping for several classes on Sunday. I'm a little tired but feeling better - managed to shake the cold off with only a few days of sniffles. Took my dad to a dr appt this morning, and we fortunately got very good news. He has been having symptoms of a disease called myasthenia gravis. He was actually diagnosed with a mild case about 20 years ago and then with certain supplements he got the symptoms under control. He has been concerned that it was returning, or worsening, so we had to find out. Thank goodness he is just experiencing some typical and non-serious aging issues and there's no sign that the MG is progressing. This is a huge relief for him and for me. When I used to drink this would have been an excuse to celebrate with some booze. Now it's just reinforcement that I need to stay sober and available to help him as he ages.

Welcome (back) to the new and returning nesters this week - so great to have you here with us!

Ok everyone, stay warm or cool (as the case may be), and I'll catch you all this weekend!

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good evening Nesters

Still cold around here but tomorrow the temp goes above freezing & the sunshine returns. My chickens will be happy to get outside for a while, they've been cooped up for the past 3 days due to the extreme cold. They haven't been fighting or beating each other up so I'm happy . It snowed all day here but only accumulated an inch or two on top of what we already had.

Wags, honestly, in my near 30 year nursing career I never saw a patient with Myasthenia Gravis. I remember learning about it but never ran across anyone. Sounds like your dad has been doing well all these years. I hope your time off has been good!

Ava, I saw your pics, looked like you were all having a good time at the concert. Funny how we remember the music of our past & connect to it in a personal way

Lots of people checked in today, that's good to see
Byrdie, hope you are feeling more like yourself.

Wishing everyone a safe night in the nest!

Lav

[BelleGirl]

Re: Newbies Nest

Checking in this morning before heading off to a gymnastics meet with daughter. Last night was not bad for a Friday night day 3, even though I had teens around. It was a snow day so I unloaded them to the mall for a while (yes, they can go to the mall, but not school?). Since son is away at college, and he and his friends aren't coming and going, it is less chaotic. And, even though I was traumatized by what I saw with daughter and boyfriend, they guy is really the nicest boy she could have chosen to be with. He is polite, doesn't give his parents any crap, actually will cook food, but naturally has the sex drive of a 17 year old boy. I'm wondering about my daughter's sex appetite also. And now I will stop talking and thinking about that.

The nest looks a little sleepy this morning. On to day 4. Wishing everyone a healthy and AF day.

[Byrdlady]

Re: Newbies Nest

Checking in. Today is 2 weeks with this Flu and I am still dragging. Yesterday at work was like a bad movie. These two big deals I’m working on are testing my last nerve. I nearly told one of them to F OFF yesterday. They are nit picking everything we do and they said we installed a PVC pipe to hide our bad wiring on their drive thru window and now they couldn’t lock it. We happen to take pictures of our installs and that was not the case at all, we used a wireless sensor! Plus, my project manager was out yesterday having rectal surgery and when I told the customer my PM was out for a medical reason, he said that was unacceptable, that other people should be able to answer their question. Low and behold, my PM (still groggy from sedation) answered our question and produced the photo that proved the customer was wrong. Of course, no apology. I hate this job.
I think God is testing me. Thankfully, my sobriety is well in tact. That’s not negotiable. Stay strong, all! Byrdie

[Slo]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good morning, all!

I loved hearing about how much you enjoyed the concert, Ava, and understanding better your history with Phil and how much his music means to you. But becoming sober means more to you, so you had to give up your Phil music until your quit was well-established!

Yes, de-tox is hard, Change, whatever we happen to be detoxing from. It’s hard -actually nearly impossible-to feel balanced, centered, & vital while detoxing. But the only way out is through!

I like vacuuming well enough, Moffit, but hate dusting. Good luck with your company! Sounds like you have your bases covered.

Glad your Friday evening turned out better than expected, Belle! That’s helpful for a day 3.

Bad colds are rough too, Wagmor, especially if you have to talk to teach!
Thinking of you too, Byrdie, as you heal from your bad flu.

[Pavati]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi, All:

Byrdie - I can't believe you're still sick. And what an a$$. That job does suck, but thank goodness you're sober - otherwise you'd be second guessing yourself instead of understanding what an a$$hat that guy (and many of your "colleagues" are). Rectal surgery - oh my.

Oh, Belle! I'm sorry. That would be hard for me. When my teenaged son was having sex with his girlfriend at her house (and he had a great relationship with her parents), I told him that if he was mature enough to have sex, he was mature enough to talk to her parents about it instead of sneaking around in her house. I don't think he took me up on that particular piece of advice, but I tried.

Wags - I had to look that up. That sounds terrible, but good that it hasn't progressed in your dad. Hope you're feeling better by class time tomorrow.

I am having a lazy morning. It was raining earlier, so I'm pretending it is a rainy day and I need to stay in my PJs. Glad I'm not hungover - just here enjoying the rain and checking in with my friends. Have a fabulous SOBER Saturday.

Pav

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good evening Nesters,

The warmup is beginning, thank goodness. I let my chickens out for the first time in several days, they were happy

Belle, great job on your first 4 days. Just keep doing that & your AF time will pile up quick
I have to tell you, as a parent I don't even want to think about my grown kids having sex. I'm grateful for my 3 grandkids but I don't need to think about how they got here. It's a weird topic so I won't even go there. As long as your teen daughter is protected & fully understands the consequences of all that, you've done all you can do. I know it's a difficult time, take care of you.

Byrdie, you poor thing. Are you taking some good multivits & getting plenty of liquids? Maybe you need a few work free days :hug:
Sorry your job is so sucky.

Hi there Slo & Pav!

Hello to all & wishing everyone a safe night in the nest!

Lav

[Guitarista]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hiya friends near and not so far,

Byrdy, i hope you can get some rest this weekend. Can't you just ditch that darn job? It seems everywhere you turn with it there are crazy illogical road blocks. Is it time for some kind of change?

Glad Phil was good Ava, and that you had a blast (of the natural variety!).

All good here on a cruisey sunday morning.

Re music and sobriety. I couldn't even play some of my own songs because it would take me straight into an emotional/drinking headspace. At least that's how it felt at the time. Now i understand that all stories are a part of life, and they just ARE. I can now revisit emotionally charged times and memories through music and pause/reflect on it for a minute before i react.

Keep up the great work Belle and Change!

Big waves to evabody. Take it easy out there.