Newbies Nest

[wagmor]

Re: Newbies Nest

NoMoreIgnoring - Welcome to the nest!!! Yep, this is definitely a good place to settle in and build your quit. If you haven't already done so, also check out the Tool Box (see link in my signature) - loads of great posts with motivation, tools for maintaining quits or getting through rough patches, etc.

Ava - OMG what a darling little pup Carl is! I'm so happy for you and Mads that you'll soon have this little guy in your household - I bet that'll be good for both of you.

Kensho and Belle - I used to do the water in the booze bottle thing too. In fact, there's still a vodka bottle in our pantry that I need to replace if my SO ever decides to drink some of it or wants to pull it out for a party. I've been putting it off (2.5 years of putting it off so far) because why spend money on poison, but some day I'll have to face that.

LC - yes, I am a tutor. I teach test prep, primarily helping people get ready for the graduate admissions exams for law school, med school and business school. I do most of my work online now, which I didn't think I'd like at first but since my 2017 car accident I've really tried to minimize the amount of driving I have to do, and by teaching online my commute can't be beat!

Byrdie - so glad to hear you're feeling better. :hug:


Ok everyone, it's just Friday and the train to Boozeville doesn't stop by any of our houses Have fantastic weekends!

[MinStar]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hey all. Sorry didn’t post yesterday. Thanks [MENTION=20191]Pavati[/MENTION] I’ve just found the bubble hour. I’ll take a look in a bit. I had a lady from the Feb 2019 army touch base and even called me. She volunteers for many addiction centres. We had a really long chat yesterday and then had school run and home to sort kidsnand make dinner as my cousin - the one who knows I have a problem- came over for moral support. I’ll write more when I can. Gotta dash.

Hope everyone. Is doing well :love

[KENSHO]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi [MENTION=24330]NoMoreIgnoring[/MENTION] ! Nice to meet you. Glad you found us - my break with alcohol has made my life a million-zillion times better. You will never regret the decision to leave alcohol behind you! I felt so much better at one week, then two weeks and 30 days, I felt like a downright superstar! I made 60, and felt clean - and soon after the cravings became less and less. Now at 400-something days, I VERY rarely actually crave alcohol. Mostly, I crave some sort of shift in my mood, and I have a bunch of other ways to do that. I have no intentions of ever going back to that madness!

[MENTION=24314]Moffit[/MENTION] - Your trigger might be ingrained in you, but your habit of drinking to address it can be changed like any habit. After I went through the hard part of missing my go-to “cure”, I pretty quickly began to find other “cures” - much more healthy ones - and they became my new go-to’s. Once alcohol is no longer an option, the other options start presenting themselves. And now, I love my new habits so much more than I ever loved alcohol!! You will get there… just keep choosing new habits, one day at a time! You will actually re-wire your brain!

Good job AVA!! I’m so impressed with you! You will never have to re-live those 20 days again!

Byrdie, glad you're back!!

AVA, Carl is quite the pup! I want to snuggle him! Isn’t it wonderful to have something furry to give our love to? I wouldn’t feel complete without a dog in my life.

Belle, I hope the gymnastics meet goes well for you! I thought when the kids got old enough for us to sleep in, we would log more hours in bed - but then they begin to have early morning competitions! UG!! I think it means the world to them that we show up though!

Hi [MENTION=3075]Change[/MENTION]! Eat, eat, eat and don’t listen to that addicted voice! It is not fully informed!!

Wagmore, could you tell your husband about that bottle, and celebrate with him that it’s been 2.5 years since you’ve engaged in that behavior? No need to sneak around any more is fabulous! Can you ask him to get more? I sure wouldn’t want to engage in those old behaviors and re-light those neural pathways!!

[MENTION=16215]MinStar[/MENTION], sounds like you’re finding some good support. Sending you an additional hug for today (((hug))).

It’s very cold here and things have been intense in Kensho-land! My daughter slammed her finger in the car door and we are trying to decide if we need an x-ray. ( [MENTION=16180]BelleGirl[/MENTION] - we do get to skip the 8:30 am basketball game tomorrow and sleep in though!).

I also had an emotional discussion with my son’s teacher for not properly addressing the stolen hoodie issue, and she told my son she would pull both kids aside today and work for a resolution. We have to teach kids that these things aren’t swept under the rug.
[MENTION=22154]Pav[/MENTION] - what’s your take on it? Am I asking too much for her to jump in and help? My son confronted this kid (who’s a year older and bigger, and the lead in the play) and said “Hey (name), my swearshirt is missing and the one you’re wearing looks exactly like it,” and the kid said, “So what… I found it on MY rack.” Hardly a claim of ownership. It’s a stupid sweatshirt, but he shouldn’t be able to get away with it!

Anyway, hoping things settle down a bit here next week. I’m emotionally, physically and spiritually drained!

Have a good one everyone!

[lifechange]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi Nesters,

great post, KENSHO..thanks for all the reminders about how good it feels to be sober, how many other possible healthy cures exist!

I made it through the 3 days of work I needed to do upon returning home.. it's been full on with the girls and jetlag and I'm bushed. The idea to get a bottle of wine to escape came into my mind this afternoon while I was shopping. I kept thinking, no, you will feel so terrible and lost tomorrow, you will ruin your quit and don't ever forget how hard it was to get some good sober time in. I wouldn't have bought alcohol, though the pull was annoying. I feel like I've put in a lot of hard work.. I don't ever again want to take the chance of having to begin again. I used to say, I don't have another quit in me, but never felt it like I feel it now. So though I'm tired as hell, I know that I can relax and sleep and eat and drink anything else.. I can nourish my body instead of poisoning it.
Yes, I also made the commitment to post each and every day no matter what.. so back on to that!

Ava, well done with the smokes and congratulations on finding such a lovely fur baby. What a honey!
Welcome to [MENTION=24330]NoMoreIgnoring[/MENTION]!

Hi and shout out to Change, Belle, Moffit, 3B's (welcome back!), Lav, NS, Byrdie, Wags, G-man, Pav, Slo, Pauly!! Hope I'm not missing anyone!
Love to all and have a good evening..xx

[Guitarista]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hola friends,

Carl looks like he has some 'tude already with that expression! haha.

A bit bushed myself. Yes LC and Kensho, we can nourish our mind, body, spirit in many other ways other than er......poisoning ourselves. Some reward eh?

Have a gr8 weekend evabody. No ticket to no freakin boozeville 'round these parts pilgrims.

[Slo]

Re: Newbies Nest

Three Bottles, you’re already halfway to a week now!! The first week is a long week, but you’re doing it!

LC, yes, I’m sure it’s a tough adjustment to return home right into the busy fray and with jet lag! I’m glad that you’re staying strong despite the temporary overwhelm & fatigue.

[MENTION=16215]MinStar[/MENTION], ‘This Naked Mind’ is also a good podcast to listen to. I really like today’s episode so far.

Kensho & Bellegirl, I only have one child at home now, so we get to divide & conquer: HB will do the early swim meet tomorrow morning, and I will do Sunday’s early morning meet. I like a weekend filed with booze-free activities!

[MENTION=24314]Moffit[/MENTION], if you can quit cigarettes then you can quit booze, right?!

[MENTION=24330]NoMoreIgnoring[/MENTION], you are spot on that a part of the reason for daily boozing is simply habit, and the old habit has to be broken while new habits are put in place. All your cleaning is a great distraction!

[MENTION=23208]wagmor[/MENTION], if it’s been 2.5 years, maybe your husband has forgotten about it and you can simply dump the watered-down vodka and throw the bottle out?

Byrdie & Pav, TGIF! G-man, I guess you don’t get this weekend off, but hope it ends up being a good day at work for you, and leaves you with enough energy for your gig tomorrow!

No ticket to Boozeville for any of us!

[Byrdlady]

Re: Newbies Nest

Welcome aboard, NoMoreIgnoring! We are so happy to have you. Everything you need to know about kicking this to the curb can be found right here. Everything is better when we have support! With Day 1 behind you, the world is your oyster! We are right beside you.

Change, every time I find myself Romancing Being Stoned, I jerk myself back to a very specific memory....that's a middle aged lady (that'd be me) taking chugs out of a hidden vodka bottle in her closet. Don't ask me why, I'd take 7 chugs at a time. I remember thinking 'what the hell are you doing? How did it get to this?' I didn't know how to stop, I was scared, my problem was getting WORSE not better. So that little gem does the job for me when I think how nice it would be to have a sip or 100. I really don't know the meaning of the word sip....I chug. UGG!
As Ava and Carl would say, TFIF (Carl is too young to cuss!!) I'm going to go take a bubble bath and wash off this day. Hugs to all, Byrdie

[Moffit]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi Nesties

[MENTION=11704]Byrdlady[/MENTION] "Romancing being Stoned" I can relate. Great that you have a certain memory that can jog you back into reality.
[MENTION=15430]lifechange[/MENTION] great attitude about keeping your quit.
[MENTION=19596]Slo[/MENTION] Yes! I can! [MENTION=20476]
[MENTION=20476]KENSHO[/MENTION][/MENTION] I'm working on those new habits!

OK, so here's the deal...I'm booked for a trip to Italy for 3 weeks...Now, what's in Italy?....RED WINE. Well, before I started this quitting journey, one of the most exciting aspects of the trip was to try out (guzzle) all the different wines. So guess what? My mind is screwing me over,"why stop now?" "Why not wait?" "You can't possibly expect to say sober when you're there." stuff like that.

Still on track!
Have a great sober day everyone!

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good evening Nesters,

Hope the bubbles were good Byrdie

Hello & welcome NoMoreIgnoring, the nest is a great place to be for support & even friendship. I've been hanging around here for nearly 10 years & have collected so many wonderful friends. Congrats on getting Day 1 under your belt, that's the hardest. Check in daily & let us know how you are doing

I really feel for those of you who have teens & dealing with their schedules. I remember telling my kids to not schedule anything early on Saturdays mornings, haha! And it had nothing to do with drinking, it was because I was working 2nd shift in those days & refused to get up early on Saturdays. Blessings to all of you supermoms!

LC, glad you are home safe, now try to get caught up on some sleep.

Getting chilly again around here, getting ready for more snow next week I hear. I'm starting to dream of spring, I'm sure my chickens are as well.
Hello to everyone & wishing a safe night in the nest for all!

Lav

[Hypernova]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hey Everyone!! Just stopping by on day 39 AF to say hi and thanks for all the posts reminding me of where the booze road leads. Right back to where I was!! Not turning around but have been looking over my shoulder lately. The mind is talking up a bit and trying to fool me again. The gym and the good food I eat to recover are a big help. Seems like I am either very health conscious or not with no middle ground. So for now it's ODAT. Gets me through and each time a thought of having a drink occurs I just think to where it will take me, relax and then wait. Definitely need to stop by here more so I do NOT forget why I am doing this. Selective memory leads me to think ~ ah what the heck. Not what I want. Here's to another AF day. I am more happy this way. best regards to all, hyper

[lifechange]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good Un-hung Saturday morning, Nesters!

Thank god I didn't drink last night! If there's ever a time when I have niggling drinking thoughts, the period after I've made it through to the other side is full of relief, subtle or great joy and the feeling of strength.. slowly but surely. Like everyone who has a bit of time on this sober journey says, not drinking, finding our ways out is simple but it isn't easy. At least not always. It's hard work, but it's the great kind of hard work that leads to results that can be seen! The kind of hard work that makes 8 weeks fly by but seem like an eternity at the same time.. Now that I have so much free time (at least 5 hours a day, no joke!) just from not picking up a drink, I'm getting to learn how to live my life with my brain intact. Trying not to think about how much I wish I could have done this long ago! I'm pretty happy to be figuring it out now.. slowly but surely. My motto.

[MENTION=11645]Hypernova[/MENTION], it's great to see you in the Nest! That you've been continuing on with your exercise and good nutrition! I would dare to say, it would make a difference for you to post here more often! Why don't you make the commitment to come here once a day to post.. not just read, but write it out as well.. and see how you feel. It helps me soooo much to connect with people here, to write out my feelings and problems, concerns.. to ask questions and get feedback. 39 days is great!! :happy2: I can't remember what area of the world you're living in?

[MENTION=24314]Moffit[/MENTION], I can imagine it would be difficult to change your frame of mind with regards to a big trip you've been planning for a long time.. but it is possible! When are you leaving? There are so many amazing things to do and see in Italy.. red wine doesn't have to be included! For me personally, if I decided to drink red wine while in Italy, my entire trip would be focussed on just that. I would inevitably drink too much and lose out on being fully present for everything else.. the culture, art and architecture, food!, people, history, music, food!, cappuccino!, landscape, etc. etc.. I would be there but not fully. If you want to go to Italy (or anywhere) and not drink, you've got to focus on ALL of the things you CAN do..:love:

ok. Off to eat some brekkie and run some errands. See you all in a bit.xx

[MinStar]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hey all. Hope your weekends are going well.
[MENTION=20476]KENSHO[/MENTION] thank you for the hug
[MENTION=19596]Slo[/MENTION] yes I’ve read the book and have been listening to her online too.
Have a good weekend folks
MinStar

[Slo]

Re: Newbies Nest

When are you leaving for Italy, Moffit? That will definitely be a challenge. But [MENTION=23208]wagmor[/MENTION] just did a successfully sober adventure vacation in Italy this past Fall!

Byrdie, you are recovered and back in fine form! That is a good tip: to quickly pull out a visual of what our secret drinking looks like. It ain’t pretty!

NoMoreIgnoring, it’s unfortunate that you live within walking distance of the shops. But I get it, as a couple times I took a bike ride...right to the liquor store for some beer to drink, then biked home. Maybe get your wife on board so you can’t do that?

Hypernova, congratulations on your quit! You have a good chunk of time under your belt now.

LC, it is interesting how we not only have to be vigilant through the challenging time, but also through the period of time afterwards. We’re very vulnerable then too.

Lav, we’re cold & very icy here, so it’s coming your way next.

Kensho, it’s true: I no longer crave alcohol either! I only crave a shift in my mood.

Wishing everyone a good AF weekend!

[wagmor]

Re: Newbies Nest

[MENTION=24314]Moffit[/MENTION] - Yep, I spent three weeks in Italy just last fall. We rode bikes across the country from Venice to Pisa with some zig-zagging along the way. Beautiful country, excellent food, fascinating history and architecture. I went in knowing Italy is also famous for wine production (and obviously wine drinking), and it was definitely around, but I made a plan in advance and had all my tools sharpened up and ready to use if needed. And I did it! My quit stayed intact and now I've passed the 2.5 year milestone.

The key for sure was to anticipate and plan, and to be sure my travel companions knew I was not going to be joining in any wine festivities.

What will your trip look like? What are you planning to do/see/etc? I'm excited to hear about it, and if I can help you make your plan in advance please don't hesitate to ask :hug:

[Guitarista]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hola evabody!

Italy sounds fab Moffit. I also travelled happily booze free through parts of Sth. america in May last year. I drank upon my return though after allowing myself to be freaked out by unfulfilled and unrealistic romantic expectations! I'm planning another trip away hopefully mid this year. You can do it. I agree that planning is key. An pre made exit plan is very very helpful for any social events involving drinking. But not everyone drinks or feels the need to. One woman i went out with in Brazil sat on half a beer all night. The other chica i went out with got smashed (on 2-3 drinks), but i don't think she was a regular boozer. So much magic and adventure to be had on that trip sober.

day 150 here. WTF?! That's 5 freakin months. Hallelujah! Thanks umpire.

Have a beaut weekend friends. Big waves to all.