Newbies Nest

[Guitarista]

Re: Newbies Nest

Yes Nar, Ava IS hot. I've met her. :congratulatory:

Talking to a chica in Cuba earlier on. Might be heading over that way soon. If so, i'll be hitting Mexico too.

Hope those deals come through pronto Byrdy. I can hear your frustration!

Good job Belle! Hi to Change, Pav and all pilgrims on the pilgrimage.

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good evening Nesters,

I put my jacket on late this afternoon & took a stroll around our large yard & did not find one stinking sign of spring Belle, haha!!!
I think the bulbs know we are due for snow next week, like it or not.

Drunken dads at basketball games is a big NO NO Pav ;(
Usually there are people at the doors making sure none of the kids have been drinking or even trying to bring something in. That dad should have been flagged. Our old high school, the same one our kids went to always had an off duty police officer or two on detail.

G, you really have the Latin America bug don't you?
You better start studying your Spanish!!

Narilly, it's down to 33 degrees now - yesterday was just a memory. Stay warm up there friend.

Byrdie, so tell me - how many cakes & cookies would you have to make to earn that commission?
I would be happy to be your mid-Atlantic ales rep

We are heading back to our daughter's house to finish up that wiring job & make a pit stop at Costco on the way home. Don't be jealous of my fabulous life, haha!
I am grateful that we are willing & able to help with these things for our kids. Sure beats sitting around hugging a wine bottle all day!

Wishing everyone a safe night in the nest!

Lav

[lifechange]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good Sunday Morning/Afternoon, Nesters!

Welcome back, Nar! It sounds like you had such a nice time in Mexico, a real break from the freezing temps you have! Glad you made it home safely..
Big hugs to all of you lovely people working on your ways out!

It was a really difficult week for me, but mostly because of my state of mind.. I'm not sure if it's depression I sometimes have, but while I'm in "it", it feels impossible to do anything. Fortunately I somehow manage to make it to work, but it's all I can do to be in a decent frame of mind there and then with the girls in the evenings. I know that exercise would make me feel better, but can't find the energy while in that state. I was in such good spirits after my trip, the visit with my parents, taking care of myself.. and wanted to continue on with it here at home.. and now almost 2 weeks have passed. I will have to figure out what I can do better/different this summer, as we'll be heading over again.
It scares me to feel like that, and to not be present here, with my support.
And to miss out on everything that is going on with you all.. Now I've read back and have caught up..

My Sunday is busy with researching for work next week.. it's interesting and uplifting so I don't mind doing it.
Kensho, How was your interview? I'm also looking forward to hearing more about it. Your hypnosis cd is on my evening plan list..

Gosh, I can't remember everything I wanted to say.. hugs to Lav, Pav, Ava, Gman, Byrdie, NS, Wags, Slo, Change, Minstar, Belle, Pauly.. hope I'm not missing anyone.
xx

[Byrdlady]

Re: Newbies Nest

Happy Sunday, all.
We are meeting my new half brother for lunch today. This is the other illegitimate one that was our family doctor’s handiwork. I was in school with him (homeroom) so we have some history of our own. I’m really looking forward to it. I have a little cake for them!
Of course, I woke up with a fever blister at the end of my nose. UGG!
If I can stay sober thru all of this, I KNOW you can! Stay strong, all! Byrdie

[Slo]

Re: Newbies Nest

Thanks for admitting that you get too depressed to be able to do any more than the basics, LC, because that happens to me very often too.
Yesterday I was completely felled by a bad cold; woke up, showered, and went right back to bed and slept all day, after sleeping all night the night before, and then slept all night last night too. Ridiculous, as most people can take a cold in stride. But every muscle was inflamed in pain. Maybe I’ll get more energy back after the full moon is over, as I seem to cycle with that.

The corporate world is insane, Byrdie. I hope your commissions come in soon. I know you were hoping for them to be in back in December.
Well, even if the family doctor’s legit children won’t have anything to do with you, at least you have a new half brother now out of all of that. Hope you have a nice day together.

No sign of Spring here, just a pretty, gentle snowfall.

Happy Sunday, everyone!

[wagmor]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hope everyone is having a good sober weekend. Sounds like folks are on track and dealing with the small and big things that life throws our way without turning to al for "help" (as if).

On this end, we've discovered we may have a major plumbing issue in our house - either a broken pipe somewhere in the drain system (if so, fingers crossed that it's under the front or side yard and not directly under the house) or a clog in same. Plumber came Fri and even with a super duper snake machine wasn't able to reach the problem, so we've got a drain/rooter company coming tomorrow morning to bring a camera and hopefully get some answers.

In the meantime, my SO is going to be having shoulder surgery this coming Thu. Biceps tendon repair plus probable rotator cuff repair (they'll know more when they get the scope in there). The recovery from said surgery is loooonnngggggg, starting with 6 weeks of basically total immobilization of that arm - in a sling almost 24/7, can do some "dangles" of arm but DO NOT LIFT IT in any way or risk tearing the repair and causing irreparable damage. No driving, at all, and no cleaning, cooking, reaching, carrying, etc with left arm. Probably not able to get dressed or shower without help. The first few weeks are likely to be very painful (meaning no nothing even with right arm, and sleep will be challenging (for both of us most likely). We've rented a medical recliner & lift chair combo and we bought a foam wedge and hospital table for the bed. Hopefully we'll keep my better half as comfortable as possible.

And now we might have to plumbing repair work done that will require digging through the floor of our basement. Where my 88 year old father lives. So I'm gonna have a sh*t-ton on my plate around here and I still have to run my business. Honestly, I'm a bit overwhelmed and the only way I can calm myself is the same way we get through our quits: take it one day at a time, and ask for help.

We've got great neighbors who will chip in to help with meals, errands, etc. I am not really a praying type of person but I am having serious chats with the universe about a little luck with both the plumbing and the surgery/recovery.

I can do this, and drinking would do nothing but make this whole situation more challenging. I am not really worried about being tempted, but it IS very interesting to be aware that these things would all have been great "excuses" to drink in the past.

[available]

Re: Newbies Nest

Morning nesters

All recovered and at work, its not worth being sick sometimes and i didnt even work from home so it will be a busy day.

A quiet weekend here, i bought Mads a doggy stroller (will post a pic from home) and it is so nice to be able to get out with her. I look one of those "mad dog ladies" and thats okay as i am. I think she needs a break from Carl and i needed to get my butt into gear and walk but i hated leaving her. I am sure i have a lot of people looking at me or maybe not! Carl is just a terror and if i have any toes left it will be a miracle. He goes to the toilet outside, he doesnt cry, he gives so many kisses and is just a ball of growing energy. I am grateful that my son is doing the major part of his upbringing atm. Mads and Carl are having their first full day at home together alone. We can just imagine Mads with blood dripping out of her mouth telling us that Carl pushed her to rip his throat out!

Nar, the weather has cooled down a lot, its only in the mid 20's now and that suits me just fine. I had a chuckle about imaging what i would say with regards to al, i definitely say some smart retort as they are looking at the back of my head as i walk away.

G you are sweet and we must meet up for another cup of coffee when time permits. I dont have your number as i had to get a new phone as my iphone turned into a flip phone a year ago. Now i have about 10 numbers in my phone and love it. 11 would be great.

Byrd i hope your lunch with your bro is totally enjoyable and be grateful you have him in your life. The others are obviously not worth your energy or time.

Have a mouse in my house, i decided to move the fridge and other things yesterday and this damn mouse seems to move to different areas of the kitchen to reside. It was nice to spend quality time with my son cleaning and he actually enjoyed the time together too, we managed to go shopping and even cook. have a lots of tomatoes and zuchini from the garden so cooked these up into a couple of dishes.

Day 30 of not smoking and i am not sure it is getting any easier but plodding along.

LC i hope you are ok. Believe me when i say that your depression/anxiety will get better the longer we are away from al. For me its menopause that is getting me down and my anxiety went to an all time high. Its taken months to get this back under control but with some patience and gp help i am back on track. Never a dull moment in my life but i suppose this is what normal people go through without the crutch of al.

Well this work isnt getting done. Take care xx

[narilly]

Re: Newbies Nest

Happy Un Hung Sunday everyone!

It is a freezing cold , windy, snowy day here but I am sober so it is a good day. I am hosting a family dinner tonight, Mexican food, Canadian style. It should be good.

Hope your lunch goes well Byrdie, let us know about it.

Ava, a mouse? I hate them, they scare the crap out of me. What a nice compliment from G, I guess we both think your hot hopefully Mads will come to love Carl, it’s always a bit difficult to introduce a new dog.

LC, I think you will feel better and better after you are sober for awhile. Wags, you too, I know your life is crazy right now, hang in there. It is great to read your posts. It sounds like you have some great neighbours.

Lav, I love going to Costco so I am jealous of your life, haha.

Have a food one everybody.

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Greetings Nesters,

We did go & take care of business at our daughter's house, no problem.
Nar, we decided to stop at the Trader Joe's near her house for some stuff. Got to thinking Costco is usually a madhouse on Sundays, haha so we skipped that.
It just started raining here & may mix in with some snow overnight.

LC, yo are fine, just as you are :hug:
You're busy & handling a lot so give yourself a break. I think we all tend to drag our butts during the last part of winter. We're just human, not machines.
I know for a fact I have much more energy when we get more light, longer days & weather where you can go out without a heavy jacket. Spring is on the way!

Wags, wow, you do have your work cut out for you. Like you said, just take it one day at a time, that's all you can do
Does your SO have insurance coverage that would allow for a home health aide to stop in daily for a while? At least until he is stronger & more confident doing things one handed? They can help with showering, dressing, a little walking or whatever he can do. The recliner is a great idea, very comfy & very useful.
I wish you both the very best!

Ava, fortunately all the mice around here prefer to take up residence in the chicken house, LOL
I don't mind so much seeing them out there & wonder how many my chickens have actually grabbed for snacks!!!!
Sounds like Mads & Carl are slowly working out territorial limits.

Byrdie, I hope your lunch went well. Fever blisters suck, sorry.

Slo, sounds like you may have had a little more than a cold. Hope you are on the mend.

G, I hope you are behaving yourself & learning some Spanish, haha!

Hello to everyone else & wishing a safe night in the nest for all!

Lav

[KENSHO]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi Everyone! Eventful weekend here. I read but will have to wait until tomorrow to reply. Night night!

[lifechange]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good morning, Nesters,

After much deliberation, I've decided I have to tell the truth. It shouldn't take deliberation, but I'm still not quite there. I drank a bit last week, when I felt like I couldn't handle it anymore, to "ease the pain", which of course didn't work. It wasn't a lot and I thought I could sweep it under the carpet and carry on with life.. But of course that didn't work either. And it isn't what I want. I want to do the work and feel the gratitude of having made it to the next step. I want to learn to deal with EVERYTHING in my life without alcohol, and learn that it's possible to get through to the other side in tact, and even better. I want to be like all of you who are living through the good times and the bad times, while being present.
I feel pretty stupid having to begin again (especially after wondering out loud last week if I was getting ahead of myself..).. but I don't feel defeated, because I can see in hindsight the warning signs, where I messed up.. and because I did have such a good and strong 56 days, I can see what would have helped me, what I should have done.
So I have to tweak my plan even more and I have to work hard to get back where I was, because this stumble, though it might have only been a little amount of alcohol, was a huge f*up in my brain.. as I knew it would be, but ignored. I just wanted to escape from my mind for a short time.. which will never ever work for me.
I sure wish I hadn't ignored my sensible mind.

Almost late for work.. I'll be back in a bit.. Please don't give up on me. I know I can do this.

[Slo]

Re: Newbies Nest

You ARE busy and handling a lot, LC. You don’t lose the days that you accrued and start all over; see the post by [MENTION=20929]Ginger999[/MENTION] in the Cattleman Cafe thread RE that. Just pick up and carry on where you left off. You are doing pretty well at adopting an AF lifestyle, so just keep practicing it. Yes, the time just after a vacation is a tricky time too; not just the vacation or change in routine itself!

I guess I have been having alcohol too as I’ve been taking NyQuil. Time to stop that now that I’m not quite so stuffed up.

[MENTION=23208]wagmor[/MENTION], when it rains it pours!
I had that same surgery done in the summer of 2015, and you describe it very accurately. We had one of those comfy lift chairs moved into our house, and I slept in it for at least a month, maybe two months. I had a good outcome, but the person has to be very diligent with their exercise program.
Oh, I hope the plumbing blockage doesn’t disrupt your dad’s living situation right at this time! It won’t be the end of the world if it does, but just more of a hassle.
I hope all of this ends up going fairly smoothly for you.

[MENTION=1354]narilly[/MENTION], a Mexican feast: yum! Or rather, a Canadian Mexican feast! -since you were just there, I guess you are acutely aware that the way we outside of Mexico make it isn’t entirely like the real thing. I bet it turned out great.

Have a good day, all!

[lifechange]

Re: Newbies Nest

Yes, Slo, you are right. And even though I thought I was taking that into consideration, I really underestimated returning to Berlin. I didn't realize how sad I would be leaving my mom and how difficult it would be coming home to the expectations of the girls after missing me for 3 weeks, etc. etc, etc. I definitely didn't plan right for that as I didn't foresee it. I was so happy, I thought it would carry over. So I've definitely learned something. I just wish it wasn't so hard for me to learn these lessons for good. There is some improvement.. Coming back here right away and telling the truth. I can't think of how many times I've run away because of embarrasment, shame, letting everyone down.. I finally know that I'm doing this for MYSELF. And I can only do that if I'm completely honest with myself, regardless of what a you-know-what I might look like. I hope you're feeling better today..:love:

Wags, I wanted to give you a big fat hug..:hug: That is so much to deal with at once.. I'm not really a praying type either, but I will put some out there for you.

I can't remember what else I wanted to say.
Love to you all.

[Pavati]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi, All:

Wags, that IS a lot to deal with. I love your affirmation of asking for help. I think sometimes we try to muscle through things when a bit of asking for help would go a long way. I remember someone saying to me that when they were sick people would say "let me know if you need anything," and she wouldn't ask, but she LOVED when people just dropped by with food, or to help her clean, or whatever. I'm glad you have nice neighbors.

LC - Sorry you drank. I feel like I could tell in your posts something was wrong, but I didn't know what to do. I like your idea of fine-tuning your plan. See the paragraph above - ask for help from someone if you need it. You got this!

Ava - I LOVE the idea of Mads in a pram. For some reason, I don't think crazy dog ladies are as crazy as crazy cat ladies, but I have no basis in fact. :happy2: I feel like my house needs a cleaning like that.

Mr. G and Ava - I would LOVE to have coffee with you both. Some day...

Lav - YES, then end of winter is tough. I was just talking about this with my sister. We are both struggling at the moment - a lot going on in life - and DRAGGING. I do think that with the longer days we will perk up a bit. I also think peri-menopause is messing with me as well. Hormones are STRONG things.

Nar, enjoy the feast. I wonder if Canadian Mexican food is the same as California Mexican food?? I LOVE those flavors.

I said no last night and feel good about it. Friends and family were headed to a bar to hear some music, but I just didn't feel like hanging out in a bar and making LOUD small talk, so I stayed home instead. Now I am feeling better and headed out on a long hike. My foot has been bothering me, and I don't think this will help, but I need the fresh air and exercise. Onward!

XO
Pav

[NoSugar]

Re: Newbies Nest

Man, [MENTION=21027]wagmore[/MENTION], your life just got really lifey, didn't it? I hope today's surgery goes well so the recovery can begin. I'm assuming your partner is as active as you are so this is probably going to be a frustrating time. Good thing she has you!! Our old house has had plumbing and electrical issues recently, too. Diagnosing the problem is a big enough deal, not to mention the actual fixing! We had a plumbing problem like yours a couple years ago --- turned out to be tree roots growing into the underground pipe that takes water waste away from the house. Gross. Good luck with all of that!!

It's great you decided to honestly confront your situation, [MENTION=15430]lifechange[/MENTION]. I'm really glad you didn't just disappear, leaving the people who care about you to wonder and worry. Like [MENTION=19596]Slo[/MENTION] said, you didn't lose this latest stretch of AF days, or any of the periods of AF time that came before. Each time you've learned something important and think about it -you've made many more right than wrong choices over the last couple years and at least the last 2 times, you came right back. You're so close, LC. And like the saying goes, you only have to get up one more time than you fall. This time can be the one you decide that no matter what, you don't drink. xx

This weekend I went with guests to one of those beer sampling pubs where you pour your own from various taps on the wall and just pay by the amount poured. It was a pretty cool environment and a lot of fun for people who like craft beer, like trying different kinds, and all of that but talk about mind-numbing for me! All they talked about were the various beers. The only food available was popcorn. It reminded me how grateful I am that this was atypical and I normally don't have to plow through this type of situation. I had no desire to drink, just to not be bored out of my mind! (Just saw your post, [MENTION=20191]Pavati[/MENTION]. I should have said No!!).