Newbies Nest

[Slo]

Re: Newbies Nest

Your doggies are adorable, Narilly, especially that tiny chihuahua. Priscilla looks to be the perfect name for her.
Your Canadian weather report spoof was hilarious!
Thanks for the shot in the arm about how you find sober life amazing.

Did you stay late at the party, Pav?

Lav, am I glad to be done with the nonsense of drinking at all gatherings? No, not really... I still feel weird that all the other adults are having all these different varieties of beers & wines showcased in all these various pretty glasses, and relaxing & getting into the groove—but I’m not. It’s just where I’m at still. I wish I could relax with a delicious beverage like that at a social gathering. But of course for me it would be gulping and becoming obsessed with getting more & more.
I feel like the only one who can’t...but then again there’s my youngest brother parked in the lounge chair with his phone. Normally at these events he’s in the garage pounding back beers with my little sister’s FIL, but I’m realizing that he couldn’t drink anything there yesterday what with that interlock device on his steering wheel. And I’m realizing that this can happen to any of us with a genetic predisposition towards alcoholism once the person experiences a couple major betrayals & traumas in life and then ends up crossing the line that we all crossed. Even someone who was once as popular, trusting in life, carefree & gregarious as my little bro was. Then I don’t feel so alone. This can happen to others too.

Then I was called upon to drive my mom & Doug the two hours home through a really, really bad ice & snowstorm, with lots of cars skidding off the road into the ditch; and I was very glad and proud that I had had no drinks so was completely alert and able to do this.

So in the end: grateful for my sobriety!

Wishing all a safe day/night in the Nest: Byrdie, LC, Wagmor, G, Pauly, NS, Bellegirl, Mighty Chi, Kensho, Ava & everyone too!

[Guitarista]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hola friends,

Slo, great job on the driving skills and on maintaining your sobriety. We don't get a lot of ice here but i've driven in such conditions and it can be hairy! Yes, we can return to the boozing, or should i say numbing out/checking out from life, our loved ones, our responsibilities to ourselves and others, etc. etc. anytime we choose. I am finding after many repeat performances that that inevitable deep darkness that always follows the short initial high and release/relax feeling i get (booze is an anaesthetic!) is a place i am less inclined to need as i rebuild my daily life. Finding what my personal mission statement is in life, here on this planet and going for that.

What are my values and loves? What kind of bloke do i want to be? Who the fk am i? Anything in my personality or character i want to change, improve, delete, tweak?

Some thoughts i had this morning - Day 179, and life can be devine! (6 months tomorrow, tuesday). I've found it depends on how i look at it. Depends totally on my perspective and my thinking. I can pick the negative path, or i can pick the positive path today. Maybe i can sit with the highs and treasure the moment. Maybe i can also sit with the lows and try to examine it to see if there's a lesson there somewhere. A winning bet each way really. Ok bookie, $5 bucks each way on life please. Because either way i win. Not despite, but because of life's ups and downs.

Big waves to y'all.

[paulywogg]

Re: Newbies Nest

IMG_20190310_135902040.jpg

[paulywogg]

Re: Newbies Nest

He doesn't like to sit still but this is Tony

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good evening Nesters,

Hello there Tony! Cute pup Pauly

We're just home from seeing our granddaughter's play & having a nice dinner out. The only one who had a beer was my husband & I couldn't care less, haha!
I don't think I could live with the anxiety of drinking again, it was pure hell. I turned all that anxiety into gratitude when I quit & I'm not changing anything now. Only 16 days until my 10 year AF anniversary, I don't drink period!!!!

LC, I really wish we could sit & talk over a cup of coffee or tea. I'm pretty sure I could convince you that whatever it is you're looking for is not AL.
I was missing a lot in my life when I started the crazy drinking & frankly I was depressed. AL numbed me for quite a while then it didn't. I needed more & more to turn my brain off for a while to get away from things. It never works, not for any of us. Does any of this sound like a possibility for you? What else can you do to address your issues? We all want to help you succeed :hug:

Wags, I sure hope you enjoyed your well deserved day off!

Hello to the whole gang & wishing a safe night in the nest for all!

Lav

[available]

Re: Newbies Nest

afternoon nesters

Tony is soo cute Pauly, i am definitely a fan of little fur babies, so much easier to handle and not as much maintenance although mads does have her three pills twice a day and pain meds and probiotics and a bland diet but she is old. Carl just loves poo and shoes.

I met my uncle and aunt yesterday, it was pretty hard actually. my uncle raped me one night when i was drunk after drinking shots and he was drunk. The family turmoil when it came out a few years later destroyed what family i had. i did forgive him and move on but i did drink AT him, he knew better and all of that. Yesterday i faced him sober and the great news is i have moved on and let it go, the anger has gone and i feel i have gained a bit of family back. I am not angry at him, i am hurt by my fathers actions of calling me a slut and disowning me but that was how he felt and maybe still does. Who knows. i have done a lot of soul searching on whether to make contact with him again and i cant, i cant let him into my life when for 25 years he has not let me into his. Its still a niggle in my mind that i will sort out but there is no hurry. The biggest positive is i am now in contact with his daughter who i was very close to growing up. Knowing that when i talk about my nana and grandad she knew them, she spent holidays with me and nana, she got to enjoy the custard and sausages and all that nana stuff you remember. Some days i really dont think my life can get any better sober but yes it can.

Today i went to buy some dirt for the garden and when it gets less sunny i will go and be with earth! ha ha. Mads is having a well earned break from Carl as i am too. My daughter is realising that Carl is a hand full of bounce and asked if i could come in and pick him up. mmmm i said no.

LC, i smoked this weekend but im not going to crucify myself, today is another day that i try and figure out what to do when anxiety and stress hits me like a brick. I know why i smoked and figuring out the why is half the battle, the other half is how to not do it next time. If i beat myself up i will get a case of the feck its and i dont want that. i will keep plodding along with you. Dolly steps for today.

Nap time for me. xx

[narilly]

Re: Newbies Nest

Holy crap Ava, that must have been SO difficult. You are one strong amazing woman. Look at the shit we went through all because of AL. It is great that you are rebuilding relationships.
Nice to be gardening, we had +1 weather here today and were really happy.

Pauly, Tony is a little cutie. I love his name, it’s perfect.
SLO, Lav, I don’t miss worrying about drinking, it is freedom not to have it on my mind.
Hope you had a great day Pav.

Good night everyone!
Xo
G, 6 months? Wowza! I am so happy for you big fella, you raawk!

[Guitarista]

Re: Newbies Nest

Struth Ava. Sorry to hear that. That's incredible you had the courage to meet him again. You're amazing and you raaaaawk! Good luck in the garden! I want to plant some stuff too. Just concerned that the possums will get into it. Anyway, not a high priority 'round here.

Thanks Narilly! You raaawk too!

Here's some audio from an English woman who runs a sober blog. A basic motivational spray about not drinking tonight.

https://s3.amazonaws.com/thesoberschool/Pep+Talk.mp3

[lifechange]

Re: Newbies Nest

Morning Nesters,

Checking in early before work to set my intention for the day..
I want to respond to some posts but will wait until the afternoon, when my mind is clear and I have more time.
Ava, :hug: I agree, you are amazing..
See you all in a bit.xx

[daisy45]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi everyone....
Need to get back on board......lost my way again!

[Guitarista]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi Daisy! :yay:

[available]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi Daisy

Great to see you again albeit not under the circumstances. You have done this before you can again.

xx

[abcowboy]

Great to see you back [MENTION=13741]daisy45[/MENTION]!

[lifechange]

Re: Newbies Nest

Welcome back, Daisy..:love:

[paulywogg]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hello nesters,Daisy,I was JUST thinking about you the other day! How funny,glad you're here Ava,I was sad to read that story,fucking alcohol! I was basically raped as a kid while staying with my extremely alcoholic biological sperm donor (won't say father,dad,etc) and I'll always wonder if he hasn't been drinking vodka like water and constantly drunk if he'd have done that shit? I wonder about your uncle too,how was it when you met up? Awkward? Forgiving? Must be so painful,truth is alcohol does make us do things we'd never do while sober, its not a truth serum like some people say either cuz my biggest lies have been while drunk! No truths in it at all,I cheated on my hubs many times during my heavy al use and I'd NEVER do that while straight, just something I'm pissed off about and always will be probably anyways,here's hoping everyone has a happy AF day!