Newbies Nest

[available]

Re: Newbies Nest

Morning nesters

Belle glad you are back and keep on here, accountability to me keeps me 100% sober each and every day. If you can live through teenagers, you can survive through anything i think. Mine became human again at about 20 or 21. I do miss the rituals i had with mads, she was on meds in the morning and night, always loved her yakult in the morning, had to have the air con on in the car for her. There is a big emptiness for sure now.

Good luck Nar with your job interview, everything is crossed.

Pav, for some reason i clean when i am stressed or angry, one would think my house would be spotless ha ha. I am enjoying this week off work, i seem to have gotten a lot done that has been put off with mads being unwell.

Wags, so glad your wife is on the mend and driving you crackers! This will be a distant memory in a years time. Thank you for your kind words with regards to mads. im trying to look after me and at least i am not crying constantly now, its just the overwhelming sadness that has settled on me. Time heals all wounds so they say.

Oh Pauly i wish i could chill on your lounge and go and see phil again, the highlight of 2019 for me. I did manage to finally renew my passport yesterday but now need to save some money to actually go somewhere.

Byrd, i never gave myself a haircut, god forbid what that would have turned out like if carls is anything to go by. I keep looking at him and just shake my head.

IMG20190327094607.jpg

Is not the best pic but his head is still fluffy yet his body is not.

take care xx

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Happy Hump day evening Nesters

Sunny but still a bit chilly here, not complaining, haha!!

Ava, I think Carl looks pretty good. I used to try to groom our golden retriever between trips to the real groomer. He was always such a mess, LOL
Enjoy the rest of your week as much as you can.

Byrdie, a trip to Denver could be nice if it didn't have a trade show attached to it, sorry.

Belle, good to see you again. Life will never be smooth for long. It just naturally has it's ups & downs. It's how we choose to handle those rough times that counts.
Keep that in mind as you continue to move forward :hug:

Wags, glad you & your wife are doing well. Being a caretaker is an exhausting job, I get that!

Narilly, I've lost 3 lbs in the past week but probably gained them back making cookies for my grandsons today, haha! But, I'm going to keep trying

Speaking of grandsons they are here now waiting for their mother to get here. Life is a thrill a minute around here some days, LOL
Wishing everyone a safe night in the nest!

Lav

[Slo]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good morning everyone,

I am really enjoying this AF family vacation this time! And, the family decided NOT to go to the bar the other night, so we stayed in and cooked dinner together and played a game, “The Game of Things” together, which was hilarious, and then watched a movie together!
Then last night they chose a restaurant over eating at the bar/party place, then passed entirely on going out there afterwards! I think only hubby is disappointed at the lack of bar time and party time on this vacation. This has been good for our 15 y/o daughter too: her older sisters & BILs are modeling having fun on vacay with alcohol being only an ancillary part and not the central focus. And then she can be included in everything too.

I sure hope your interview goes smoothly today, Narilly.

Wagmor, glad your wife’s surgery had the knock-on effect of giving you a lighter work schedule, so you could regenerate too!

Ava, you found a trick for getting a good night’s sleep; a day of active physical labor.

Happy booze-free Friday to all!

[Pavati]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi, Nest--

Glad you're good, Pauly. Winslow is a cute name.

Wags - glad it is all progressing. I'm not quite at PE teacher level, but I definitely feel the need to move. I have had a fairly sedentary couple of weeks, and I am feeling it mentally and physically. This is usually when my family starts saying "don't you want to get out and go for a hike?" I have been working and the weather has been crap, but I see relief in my future...Must. Exercise.

Slo - that is amazing. I love the idea of your good influence on your family. I always think it is great for my teenagers to see me be silly and have fun without alcohol - and family game night is among my faves.

Belle - Ah, the curse of cooking with wine. I don't do it, but I will say that my recipes aren't quite the same. There are some substitutes, but they don't quite cut it. I am with you on the teenager train. On the one hand, I want to spend a lot of time with them because I know they are leaving the nest soon, and on the other hand I want to kick them and their sink full of dishes out of the nest asap.

Ava - Carl is adorable. Such a sweet face!

So Happy It's Thursday!

Pav

[KENSHO]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi Nest! Lovely spring day here in the desert. The sounds the birds make here are amazing! We are loving the sun and 20 degree temp increases from our home. It is truly relaxing here.

Wags, glad to hear the recovery ward is going well. It's worth the pain now. So glad you chose to take some time off. Working for myself also, I tend to self-regulate my schedule, and always love when I feel refreshed after a break. Good job knowing what you needed!

Belle, that one taste would do me in. It just opens the door for that voice to infiltrate all reason. I'm sorry you drank. You can get right back at it though.

Narily, sending good thoughts for your interview! GO get 'em!

Byrd, we must talk about Denver.

My husband and I went on a mountain bike ride yesterday, and I biffed it good. Banged up my leg, and back and bruised a calf. Thank GOD I didn't fall into a cactus! My husband saw me once I caught up with him (he is a faster rider than me), and he helped me clean out my wounds. Then he said, you're going to want a beer when you get back! I said, "more like a whisky... but it'll have to be something different, or I'll want it all the time." After a warm shower, peroxide, ointment, advil, ice and rest, I'm feeling much better. And no hangover! They were also having wine with dinner, but I got myself a sugary drink, and that solved the problem for me. I think a good part of my addiction was sugar-related.

I have to run into the kitchen and help prepare bagels and lox now... we are nursing husband's MIL, who recently had a knee replacement. So I've been helping a lot.

We're driving home tomorrow and Sat. with a stop in the middle. What I call exhausting rest. Keep up the good work everyone! I used to turn to shots every time something bad happened - but now I don't and I don't miss it much.

[New Sunrise]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hello Newbies!

I am a Newbie againbe! I was sober at one time and it lasted for 4 years, thought I could handle alcohol again and now 8 years later I am beginning again. I am so glad that you guys are here. I have been reading through a lot of posts and I have finally gotten to the point to make today my day 1 and I am half way through the day already.

I come in here with so many issues that I need to deal with but alcoholism is my biggest and hardest to tackle. I know from before that stopping drinking will not cure my other problems like I thought the first time but I will be healthier and better able to deal with them.

Thank you all for sharing so much of yourselves and your lives on here. Your shares have made it so that I can make today day 1 and I have more tools in my tool box to make today a sober day.

New Sunrise

[NoSugar]

Re: Newbies Nest

I used to groom my dogs and shave my legs while drinking. We ALL suffered :egad:
Thankfully my reminder scars have faded...

It is great to see you in the Nest, [MENTION=24351]New Sunrise[/MENTION]! It helps so much to have a community of like-minded nondrinkers, especially since so often in the real world we feel like we are the weird ones (as if it is totally normal and sensible to drink a known poison!!!).

Did you use a program last time you quit? There aren't set guidelines here but there are lots of different ideas, some of which might be perfect for you. Feel free to ask any questions. I'm looking forward to getting to know you, NS

[available]

Re: Newbies Nest

morning nesters

Welcome Sunrise, and we all get how you feel with regards to alcohol. 4 years is a long time sober, can you talk about why your drank?

Well i am at work early and going to leave shortly, it has been a week since mads went to sleep and i have kind of stopped crying but the sadness is hard. I decided i am going to join a gym now. i am going to be THAT busy its going to kill me but i do sleep better when i am exhausted. Some days i just want to crawl under the covers and cry and other days i have to do something. But i wont drink.

I have had a busy week, went and had my eyes tested and ordered new glasses, renewed my passport and the story about my car. In 2009 i bought a new car and that was in the height of my drinking days. eventually i wracked up $6000 in fines and they cancelled my registration. I did start to pay off said fines but well i still had to drink (oh fines were from red lights and doing 5-10k's over the speed limit, nothing drastic) and i stopped paying them off. For years i did get letters regarding fines but i didnt open the mail, i was too busy drinking and opening mail made me anxious. Well a few weeks ago i asked my mechanic if he could get my Getz going again and he did. I finally made an apt at the registration place and went yesterday with my son. My anxiety was through the roof as i was like "oh the police are going to be there and i am going to jail" BUT i now have it registered and no mention of the fines. If i do get a letter in the mail then so be it but i was so proud of myself after five years of sobriety to go and get my car registered. Its like brand new with 75000k's on it and 10 years old. I may be slow to move forward in my sobriety but nothing is easy on this journey and its not a race, its about doing things when we feel ready to do them. Oh and i put off getting my passport for the same reason, those fines. I mean why would they not give me a passport due to $6000 when there are so many people with more debt than i can ever imagine.

Slo, i am so glad you are having a great holiday, those firsts are the best and prepare us for the next time.

Kensho, i bought a bike the other week and am always thinking i will fall off. I am not alone! Hope you are feeling better.

Well best get back to work.

Take care xx

[Guitarista]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hola Nesters!

Welcome back New sunrise. It sure is a new sunrise every day. A new opportunity for change with each sunrise.

I love the rough and tumble of outdoors adventures Kensho! I hope you're ok, and heal up fully and quickly. Not sure what's going on with hubby suggesting a beer after over a year AF? He needs to ditch that attitude now, and git onboard wit u.

Congrat's on getting your wheels back on the road Ava! So cool. Re fines, you'll be able to arrange an affordable (make sure it's affordable for you) payback plan if that's what you want to do. They may ask for a 1 grand or similar lump sum to kick it off. Either way, don't stress. The wide open road awaits.

Anyone read American Dr. Michael Greger's website NutritionFacts.org | The Latest Nutrition Related Topics ? The bloke makes sense to me.

Waves to y'all.

Take it easy out there. L8tr g8trs!

[Byrdlady]

Re: Newbies Nest

Kensho, I’m so sorry you took a fall. I bet you’re sore today. Gentle hugs.
Welcome aboard, Sunrise. It’s a good feeling to get Day 1 behind you! We’ll be right by your side, so ask away if we can help.
Hugs to all, Byrdie

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good evening Nesters,

We had another nice but too chilly day, still not complaining, haha!

Hello & welcome New Sunrise, glad you found us! Settle in the nest & stay put at least until you get your bearings. Please ask if you need help with anything & be sure to visit the Tool Box.

Slo, glad your vacation is going so well, enjoy

Kensho, hope your boo boos heal up quickly! Ouch!

Pav, my winter pig out is officially over, LOL. I feel better just after a few days of eating less & smarter. I'm sure you will too

Ava, that's a lot of $$ in fines, lucky they haven't come looking for you. I agree with G, setting up a reasonable payment plan usually makes them happy & keeps them out of your face. Tackle one thing at a time so you don't overwhelm yourself, OK?

G, I'll take a look at that website. I'm always interested in nutrition.

NS, speaking of nutrition - hello to you as well.

Byrdie, what's going on with you? Hope your day was good.

Wishing everyone a safe night in the nest!

Lav

[STEADFAST]

Re: Newbies Nest

A belated but heartfelt congratulations on your Ten Years' Sobriety, Lavande.

love,
Steady
:heartbeat:

[New Sunrise]

Re: Newbies Nest

Thank you all for the warm welcome! I am so glad to be here. There is nothing like being with people who know what you are going through.

Available, it is such a long story as to why I started drinking again. Basically, I thought I could handle it. The more complicated part was that I separated and later divorced the man I was married to for over 20 years. Getting sober the first time was not easy because as I got drunk every evening, I would wind up "going to bed early" aka passing out and that gave him freedom to leave the house and meet up with a girl friend or two or three. I lost count when I found out about it. He was never a supporter of my sobriety, go figure. I left with my high school age daughter and moved in with my brother who is an alcoholic. Having a beer or glass of wine with him, every once in a while, turned into happy hour when I came home from work. It did not get that bad quickly, but it is, was, that bad now.

I stopped drinking by going to AA meetings and though the meetings helped, the friendships I had made and the support we gave each other helped much, much more. I lived in a fairly large city then. Fast forward, I am remarried to a wonderful man who really has no idea the extent that I have been drinking. He drinks himself, moderately, but not moderately enough to notice that I have gone to far. I will deal with that later, one thing at a time.

He has been transferred and now we live in a different state, in a very small town, in the country. I have learned that everyone here knows everyone else's business, common in small communities. There is only one AA meeting in this town a week. The nearest city, where you can truly stay anonymous, is about 20 miles away. My computer is so much closer than that!

I am just so grateful to find this site!

I did make it through yesterday totally sober, and slept great last night. I slept so good that I didn't want to get up! My husband travels and will be home this evening so I have some house work to get done. I also have a lunch with the local woman's league today. I thought that getting involved in our new community would help me some. I am so glad that none of these ladies drink at lunch! I am sure that today we will figure out where flowers need to be planted and which part of the local roads need a quick clean up. It is nice to be part of a community, but I am not my authentic self around them. I am a Stepford wife :egad:. I can be myself on here with all my rough edges and sweat pants on!

Congratulations to you Lavande! Ten years is wonderful and a lot of hard work! Good for you!

[available]

Re: Newbies Nest

Just a quick pop in before bed for me to say thanks for sharing your story Sunrise. I found that the computer was easiest and thought that if an online forum didnt help me then i would go to AA. The online site and the friends i have made on here over the years has kept me sober and of course now i have learnt the tools to not drink in situations. What an a'hole of a first husband, much admiration for you for walking away but it does seem to escalate our drinking. when i broke up with my ex hubs my drinking got out of control for ten years until the blackouts and my health started suffering and i found my rock bottom. Now i refuse to drink at anyone, it doesnt hurt them, it only hurts me. One is too many and 100 is not enough, i know that would never change if i drank.

Great work on day 2 and keep keeping busy, atm i find if i can keep my mind busy i dont think too much though you could throw me a bit of your sleep please.

Keep logging on and being accountable and take it day by day.

[paulywogg]

Re: Newbies Nest

Morning nesters, Welcome Sunrise your story sounds familiar and I can sure relate,sounds like you have a plan to get and stay sober so that's a good thing,Kensho,sorry about your fall,I can't ride a bike anymore cuz my balance sucks,yes even sober haha,Wags,glad your wife is healing well and getting around,waves to all and wishes for a great AF Friday!