Newbies Nest

[Pavati]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi, all:

good to see you pop in Kensho!

LC, what's up? Why are you feeling off? What's your plan after work? Stick close.

Nar - my mom's dog - but he lives right upstairs, so I spend a good deal of time with him!

Belle, as you know, I am in teenager land, too. No joke. Yes, being sober for them is very big in my opinion.

Lav, hope the patient heals soon. What a pain. I'm sure they just have to have "clear borders," right? Hope he heals, and you regain some sanity.

Happy Hump Day.

Pav

[nadia777]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi,

I'm new here and very lost. How should I begin?

Thank you.

Nadia

[paulywogg]

Re: Newbies Nest

Welcome Nadia Kensho,good to see you,LC,some days just feel"off" I know that feeling well,all I can say is keep busy and distracted,get some treats! Friday is one of my hard days,I'm off and direnction less so I'll pull thru Taco Bell and get crap food that tastes amazing to me haha,then I'll treat myself to a shirt or pants,shoes whatever,at this point anything is better than drinkin so if I have 500 shirts hanging in my closet so be it,I'll wear them eventually,I'm also trying to throw out all clothes that remind me of my drinking days so I'm refilling anyways,Lav,glad YB is doing better,a bit grumpy but better,New Sunrise I love your avatar waves to all I missed, wishes for a great AF day for us all

[FeralPuppy]

Re: Newbies Nest

Checking in briefly here - all is good and totally sober.

I just read NoSugar's thread on relapsing. Wow, definitely time well spent. For anyone who is curious:

https://www.mywayout.org/community/general-discussion/73619-relapse-retrospect.html

[NoSugar]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi,
I'm new here and very lost. How should I begin?
Thank you.
Nadia

Hi, Nadia. Reading and Posting here is a great start! Maybe you could tell us something about yourself and your goals regarding drinking.
Most of us started here wanting to moderate our intake and ended up as happy abstainers. But you don't have to decide that right now if you're not ready.
I promised myself I would do what it took to get 30 days without drinking, enough time to clear my fuzzy brain and actually be able to evaluate my situation and make an informed, clear decision.
Reading the toolbox thread also is helpful.

Anyway, :welcome:!

[KENSHO]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi [MENTION=24376]nadia777[/MENTION]! Welcome! I came here in 2014, looking for relief with my drinking habits. I have learned so much in the past years and am in a happy place now - glad you are here too! This is a great place with nice, supportive people. Let us know what you need!

[Byrdlady]

Re: Newbies Nest

Nadia, we are so glad you found us. Please see the tool box link in my signature line, it's full of helpful tips and tricks to make it thru those first challenging days. The first thing people here told me to do was get a PLAN. I didn't pay much attention to that until it became absolutley necessary that I stop drinking, then I realized its importance. The Tool Box has lots of ideas about a plan. We are so glad you're here.

New Sunrise, we seem to be operating in parallel universes. We have an elderly man across the street and hubs noticed his paper was still in the paper box when he got back from walking. He took it out and put it by the door and noticed his car was in the garage. He called his phone several times with no answer. He finally called his son who lives in town and he raced down. I saw him go into the house and a couple minutes later, he ran across to the street to get my hubs, who called 911. They had him administer CPR until the paramedics came. I'm afraid he was gone before he hit the floor. They suspect a massive heart attack. He had a sizable cut on his head (he hit a cabinet) that only bled a little bit so they don't think his heart was pumping after he fell. Just a very sad day, he was a good man. 83. I'm afraid I will miss his service as I will be going to Chicago on Friday. I hate that, he was a good friend. You just never know.
Life is precious, that is for sure. I'm so glad I finally did the work to quit poisoning myself. Hugs to all, and I want everyone to know how much I appreciate you. I could not have done this without this nest. Byrdie

[available]

Re: Newbies Nest

morning nesters

Belle, each day will get easier to deal with, hang in there. You dont want the GSR's that you came back with and those horrible feelings. Keep on here.

Slo, well not sure its appreciation, i emailed for a review/payrise and the Head said no money. I rang my boss and told her to sort the shite out or i was walking, apparently the Head didnt know there were different pay grades for coordinators. So i need to go armed and dangerous to get this payrise. Sad that pay rises are not based on people's efficiency in their job, i know a few people who would be lucky to make a dollar a week.

Nar, isnt it nice not to wake up sober. I was listening to some birds early the other morning, those birds i wanted to shoot due to their happiness level when i woke up with a god awful hangover which lasted until i drank again at 3ish. Good luck with your job hunting.

Sunrise, i have a cat that is about 34 or 24 now. I bought said cat for the children and still have the very unfriendly said cat. She meows at 4.15am when i get up for work and meows at 2pm when i get home to be fed. very occasionally she wants a pat. I keep thinking of putting her to sleep as she is so thin and old but she is still eating breathing so we plod along. i will miss the old girl though. Carl just loves her and always wants to play, she on the other hand just hisses at him.

Lav, i cant imagine doing anything that i do now if i was drinking, i didnt have a life back then. Hope hubs is ok and the results are good.

LC, we all have off days, no excuse to drink them away. There are so many other life choices to make to get us through the hard days. You can do this.

Hi Nadia and welcome. As NS says post away, anytime and whatever you want to say. How much do you drink? I was a two bottle of wine a day girl heading for 3. If i can stop drinking anyone can (we would all say the same). Its not easy but nothing in life is.

I had an email from an old MWO friend who i am in contact with last night and she was still drinking and thinks that she now has fluid build up in her stomach due to al. I hope not but as we know al takes and takes.

Best get back to work, i am a lot calmer today after the email saying no payrise. At least i have faith now that he will listen to my arguments and workload and pay me what i deserve. My son came for a visit last night and that was lovely, he is going to Sydney to work at a hemp expo. i just worry about him on the road. 6 weeks sf and the person i see at work wants me in the news letter to promote their quit smoking program. she says i am an inspiration! As i told her, she is the inspiration, putting up with me relapsing for the past 3 years and having faith in me.

take care x

[Guitarista]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hola friends,

Welcome Nadia! Good to have you here. No right or wrong, jump in anywhere you like, or enjoy reading the wealth of useful info and strategies in the toolbox and elsewhere.

Ava, you're gonna be a pin up gal for no smoking! There'll be a short award winning film at Cannes next, after the book of course - 'My first year orf the fags' Brilliant work all round mi amiga. ;-)

Love your avatar Sunrise. Good luck with the air con!

Thanks friend Kensho for the number 8 expose and congrat's. Interesting reading.

Today i'd better actually book some accomodation for the upcoming 5 week trip. Or it'll be a hammock at the back of Juan's joint on the beach. Hope the weather's nice. Taking a recorder along so might get a live album or 2 out of my travels. Hope i can hook up with some local muso's along the way.

Edit: I can't talk enough about the real and fairly immediate benefits (often feel much better in the first week) of giving up booze. If i were still drinking, none, i say zero of my upcoming travel adventure would be close to happening. It would all just be cool ideas i had, and day dreaming those ideas around in circles until comatose or something else took my short attention span fancy. I have released 2 guitar albums this year with a 3rd on the way. The real me now has no barrier or impediment to shine. But it is me, you, us who are the heroes. It is us who can decide which direction we go in today. I, you, are captain of this ship. Now i'm living sober, i am better prepared for the unseen submerged reefs and stormy weather coming. Similarly, i revel in the blue skies and calmer seas that seem to prevail round these parts much more often now i'm living sober. My decision. I have the power to change and be who/what i want to be. The fog has cleared, the artificial me has dissolved allowing the real man to come forward and be. Today i have control over how i feel about my feelings. My course is charted for today. I have purpose. I am grateful. I am captain of this ship.

Big waves to evabody. Take care out there. x

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good evening Nesters,

Sunshine & blue skies here for a change, nice
I hope this weather sticks around for a while. It’s no fun trying to garden in the mud, haha!

Hello & welcome Nadia, glad you found us.
I remember being scared to death when I first signed on here, didn’t know what to do either. Sticking close to the nest & putting together a good working plan helped me get to where I am today - 10 years AF. You can do it too!!!

Ava, it’s such a shame when you have to beg for more money, I get that. My years of hospital work taught me to be grateful for every single dollar I could squeeze out of them, LOL I hope they come thru for you.

G, get your reservations in place dude!! You need a social secretary or something?
Make your trip as wonderful as it can be.

Byrdie, sorry about your neighbor, that’s a sad way for a lonely senior to go.

Hello to everyone & wishing for a safe night in the nest for all.

Lav

[New Sunrise]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good Morning All!

It is not such an early morning for me! HVAC unit is in place and working so well! He came back early yesterday morning and relented letting hubby help him with the rewiring. Made hubby feel good, he got done faster and he still kept to his price! I am a miser, I will admit, but living off my retirement makes me feel not so useful as far as contributing to the household. Now that we are settled, I don't travel as much with hubby, and my neck is better, I am ready to go again with at least a part time job. Here I go again...

Guitarista- I am so glad that you are so much more productive and accomplishing so much! I do love music so much, I can't sing it or play it, but I sure love listening to it! Being sober has also given me the ambition to move more again and I think a part time job would be just the ticket.

Nadia- WELCOME!!! Please feel free to spill your guts here! I always feel bad hitting 'quick reply' because I am not quick in my posts. Writing everything down here may be a lot but it is what I need to do to keep sober. This is my second quit, my first was in AA and so my sponsor and I would talk for hours. I think my posts take about that long to read also. It keeps me sober, again, 7 weeks today! It is different to quit the second time in so many ways, some better, some worse.

Belle- I am so glad that you have such a good attitude and so committed to your quit. I am proud of you! I do not envy you the teenage thing, as teenagers, my two boys were complete morons! Pot smoking!!! Little jerks! They don't now, but they did in high school. I could always tell because they would come in acting like complete idiots. My daughter is much younger then them and I would not have it in my house. I got to the point that I told them that privacy was a privilege and I would go in their rooms and those little suckers would hide it in the same place for a few times, change the place, then hide it again in the same place. They would have the nerve to come downstairs and ask me what I did with their pot? Com' on now??? They were always a challenge. I still consider my middle son as my son because he live with us so long, he was a step, and sorry to say that we have not been close since his father died. Oh well, time has a way of changing things.

Feral- I am glad you are doing well. No Sug's Relapse in Retrospect is good and helped me a lot.

Byrd- So sorry about your old neighbor. I sent hubby over yesterday to talk with our neighbor, he plain old scares me! He is more of a man's man. Hubby gave him my number in case he needed help. His wife has had surgery on her hip and had a fall night before last . His son lives about 30 min away but came over to check on them. Hubby talked to him about all the break-ins and he had no idea, but knew kids did it from time to time. Not sure if they need the money to buy meth or make it. Breaking Bad country. He does keep everything secure and has a shot gun. Guns are also really big around here. :egad:

Avail- good luck on that pay raise! It sucks when you work hard and have to beg for money. Last raise my hubby got he went right to the CEO. He is the most senior in his department, besides his boss, and it was ridiculous that he was not compensated for it. CEO had a fit, but still it took 4 months for the raise to come through, department budgets and all. Thing is, hubby gets offers all the time but this company is so good to work for, really very loyal to their employees, and hubby doesn't want to change. Hubby did let CEO know about all the offers though.

Today we get back to normal! I can exercise and work up a sweat without worrying that I wont cool down or have to stop for an estimate. I can cook in the house again, relax with hubby by the pool. It sounds like a great way to celebrate my 7th week. Our pockets are a bit lighter, but we are so lucky that we could cover this expense.

Happy Sober Thursday to all!

[paulywogg]

Re: Newbies Nest

Pockets may seem tighter New Sunrise but think of all the money you haven't wasted on booze! Byrdie,sorry about your neighbor,that's really sad waves to all and have a Fab AF day!

[wagmor]

Re: Newbies Nest

Nadia - welcome to MWO and especially to the Nest! As others have suggested, the best way to get started is to read through the Tool Box, to maybe post a little about yourself and your situation (whatever you're comfortable sharing), and to make a plan for your quit. We've all been down this road, some of us several times before things really clicked, and you'll find nothing but understanding, honesty and support here.

Byrdie - sorry to hear about your neighbor, and glad your husband noticed that things were off. It's a sad situation but would have been much sadder if more time had passed. Hugs to you as well as you continue to deal with the apparently nonstop BS of your job.

New Sunrise - love the new avatar! And hooray for being able to cool your house and just generally go about your daily routine again without having to think about not being able to cool yourself or the house down.

Ava - bad news about no raise, but good news about continuing to build your smoke-free quit!


Hellos and waves to Lav, Pav, Kensho, Nar, Pauly, NoSugar, G-hombre, Belle, Slo, and everyone else dropping by the nest today. Make it a good day/eve!

[Pavati]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi, All:

Pauly, that's exactly what I was going to say - let's tally all of the money we saved from not drinking. Totally worth a new air conditioner.

Ava - SO happy for you quitting smoking. I know that is very hard. Poster child indeed. It is funny how that addiction can be so public, while alcohol is in the shadows. Imagine being a poster child for quitting drinking. Well, if anyone would do it, I know it would be you. You know I admire your out loud sobriety. Of course you deserve the raise - keep at it.

G - You sound so great. I am excited to follow your travels. When do you leave?

Welcome, Nadia. What's going on? I agree with NoSugar's 30 day trial, and many have found that is a good way to start. For me, that didn't work, however. I needed to be clear in my mind that I wasn't going to drink again because that laid the foundation to try to spend time working on my own personal toolbox. How would I have fun without booze? De-stress? Sooth anxiety? Blah blah blah. If I left the door open just a little, I knew that booze would shove that thing open and come right back through. Do what you need to do for you. I recommend coming clean to someone in person as well, but that may be a bit down the line for you. It helped me face my lies to myself more quickly.

Sunrise - things are looking up. Your breaking bad neighborhood sounds sad. Meth is NO JOKE. We are seeing an upsurge of meth use in my county. So very sad. It changes brain chemistry and can be so hard to stop using. The marijuana situation sounds familiar also. My kids are pretty good at hiding it, but once in a while I will find it. The older one I now just leave alone, but the younger one I still take it. I also talk ad nauseum about addiction, getting high on life and other annoying sober mom things. I hope they find balance, and I believe they will.

Out of time this morning. Hope you all have spectacular sober days.

Pav

[narilly]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hello Nadia! Welcome. Tell us a bit about yourself, it really helps to post here. We all had a day 1 in this journey- just take it day by day. Don't think too far into the future.

That was a great post Captain G, so glad you are doing well.
Ava, you make me laugh. Yeah, birds in the morning are annoying especially when you are hungover and trying to sleep it off. I don't miss that! Yeah, it really hope you get that raise. You deserve it!

Byrdie, sad about your neighbour. My mom lives on her own and she is 84, it always crosses my mind the same thing could happen to her. My friend's mom died exactly the same way as your friend. She went in to find her laying on the kitchen floor, she had been there for about a day and died of a massive heart attack. Yes, life is precious, so glad I am sober to enjoy it.
Its Thursday so one more day before you have a nice weekend to relax. Same with you Pauly.
NSun, yeah the meth stuff is crazy. It is hard to imagine you being so hot while it is always a bit cool here.

Hi ya Wags!


I have an interview at 1pm so I have to go prepare. Not sure if this is a good job for me but I will see.

xo