Newbies Nest

[KENSHO]

Re: Newbies Nest

G, so excited for your travels. A hammock at Juan’s doesn’t sound so bad! I guess I’m craving some adventure in my life currently. I used to adventure a LOT


Byrdie, sorry for the loss of your neighbor. What a shock.

New Sunrise, congrats on 7 weeks today! Should I send you a link on the meaning of lucky seven? Keep going, proud of you!

PAV, I want to play that game… I’ve saved at least $7k so far! That’s not nothin’! I’m glad you are positive about your kids finding balance. I try so hard to help mine at times, but know they need to figure a few things out themselves.

Narily - rock that interview!

I was thinking about hangovers this am. I felt a little nauseous for some reason, and remembered that I used to feel that on a regular basis. Yuck! I never have to have an alcohol hangover again! Food hangover… well that might happen from time to time.

Pretty day here. I’m feeling VERY unmotivated to do anything at all. Trying to plod along. I think my adrenals are out of whack again, and I had ice cream last night. My body really doesn’t like milk - I get itchy skin and crazy brain fog the next day. It was sure delicious though.

Almost the weekend… used to be a reason to drink. I’m so happy and proud of myself for choosing a better life.

[New Sunrise]

Re: Newbies Nest

WOW! Big milestone for me! I went to get my haircut and had to stop at the war zone, hubby eats a tremendous amount. I was pulling in my driveway and realized that I didn't even think or look at the wine aisle!

Now that is the way to celebrate week 7! Patting myself on the back:yay::sohappy:

[BelleGirl]

Re: Newbies Nest

I thought I would feel better this first week without booze. I'm in a funk. Son is home, but off with girlfriend so haven't seen much of him. Daughter and I go away for the weekend for gymnastics competition. The final and big one of the year...state competition. I would usually be more excited, but I just worry that there will be some drama at home with son and husband and I will get a phone call and blah blah blah.

I really wish I knew what was wrong with me. I feel like I don't know myself anymore. My head is clear but my emotions are flat. And I feel worried and anxious about everything. yes I know booze won't help, and just thinking about it I would not even like to feel that foggy headed feeling. It just seems that there is nothing to look forward to in life.

Sorry for the whining...I guess I just had to get it out somewhere.

It sounds like everyone is doing pretty well. Mr G, I think Juan's beachside hammock sounds great. I really love reading about everyone's experiences and hearing the wisdom here. I just don't have much of that to offer myself right now.

Time to feed fido...she's going downhill pretty fast. But still happy to eat!

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good evening Nesters,

Had to put my shades on today, nice sunny day

Belle, hang in there, you will be feeling better soon. WE can’t fix these things overnight although we certainly wish we could.
Try not to worry about future events, things that may never even happen. We heap a lot of extra stress & anxiety on ourselves doing that. I used to be a real pro making myself anxious. I keep reminding myself of Tolle’s The Power of Now! Be kind to yourself, please.

New Sunrise, awesome on your 7 weeks! Glad your AC is back in good working order.

Ava, great job on ditching the smokes. I’ll be celebrating 10 years free of them in another 3 days ~ if I make it, LOL I’m so glad I quit, you will be as well.

Great seeing everyone checking in today & wishing a safe night in the nest for all!

Lav

[Byrdlady]

Re: Newbies Nest

Evening, nesters.
Heading to Chicago tomorrow for the National Restaurant Association trade show. Working all weekend. Yuck. Byrdie

[New Sunrise]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good Morning All!

I don't have much to say this morning! I know you have probably fallen off your chair now. I am in a good place this morning, still impressed that I went in the war zone and forgot about the bombs.

Bryd- I hope you have a good trip to Chicago. The restaurant business is not an easy one. I wish you much success.

Belle- I am glad you came in here and you are not whining. Share away, it does make one feel better. You will get the anxiety thing manageable. Just remember the serenity prayer. I wish your daughter luck on her competition this weekend. Enjoy this time, because it goes so fast, and in later years...well you will be glad it is over and just the memory remains. I really don't envy you and all the teenage years. I loved my boys, no doubt about it, but I am glad that they are on their own and a telephone call away. I don't have to answer the phone if I don't want to. I am a cranky old woman now!

Neighborhood news...no break-ins but the bears are maybe starting to roam around early? My neighbor called me to warn me a little cub was roaming around her yard and she took a pic of it at her sliding glass door. Such an adorable little thing and it had to be looking for its mama. Our back yards kind of connect, though we are totally fenced in with a privacy fence. The bears climb them only when necessary. We kept watching our cameras but it never came our way. I love the wild life around here and the bears are great, as long as you are indoors.

Happy Friday everyone! AF free here!

[paulywogg]

Re: Newbies Nest

Morning nesters, Belle,you're not whining! I too feel kind of yuck and I'm starting to think it has more to do with me than it did the alcohol now that it's been awhile off it,I have lack of energy,focus, sleep is bleh and I have that kind of flat feel like you described but I think mine is hormones honestly,I seen the doctor yesterday and she said 45 is too young to be premenopause,I call b.s cuz I've read about even younger women going thru it,I just hafta have faith things will get better,even tho I'm not 100% it's better than the 10% I'd be if I were still drinking,bleh. Kensho,you woke up with nausea I woke up with that same headache I'd get when I drank,an ugly dull feeling, actually had to think back and realize no I didn't drink yesterday haha,big waves to all and wishes for a fabulous AF Friday!

[Slo]

Re: Newbies Nest

My sister was discharged from the hospital yesterday after alcohol detox. (And it also served as follow up care after her abdominal surgery and resulting damaged heart.)
Her doctor said he doesn’t want to see her there again unless it’s as a visitor!
He said if she followed us (the doctors) around, she would see that 50% of the patients are there because of alcohol, either directly or indirectly!
She feels terrible about disappointing all those doctors who worked so hard to save her life, and it sounds like she wants to embrace a sober, alcohol-free life now.

[BelleGirl]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good morning everyone, (and good evening where appropriate),

Lav thanks for the sage advice. I too am a pro at "castastrophising" things. I can take the smallest thought and see it through to being some sort of catastrophe. That is also how I should think about taking that first drink, and what helped me the most during my almost 5 year quit. Yes, that thinking is good in that scenario, but not for most of life's events. Thanks for the recommendation...I just downloaded Tolle’s The Power of Now to my phone kindle app so I have something inspiring to read during gymnastics events this weekend.

New Sunrise...good on you for 7 weeks, and I too love your avatar. I went back to one of your previous posts about your boys when they were teens...'little jerks'...lol. But that sums it up. I haven't seen evidence about weed with my son, though he was away at college all year, but I do wonder about vaping. My daughter is 16 and even though there are hormones, drama and a boyfriend...she is much easier, at the moment. The boyfriend creates issues (sex, and all the baggage around that), but he is such a great kid all around and other than catching them 'in the act' once, I have not had a single problem with him and he has been around for almost a year.

Byrdie, good luck this weekend. ugh, but what a way to spend a weekend. I hope they give you hazard pay for this, because it must be a hazard to your health.

Ava, I always read all of your posts even if they are not directed in any way to me...lol. You are definitely one of the nest moms here.

Pauly, sorry you feel crappy too. I guess I was expecting the sober 'high' I had during my first quit 6 or so years ago. Real life is much more complicated now, so maybe that is part of it. Perhaps that headache this morning is a good reminder why we don't drink. Hope you feel better soon.

New Sunrise was talking about bears. We have a fox family living under our shed (it is more like an outdoor 'man cave') and they were quite active this morning feasting on a squirrel. The pups are adorable and Mom and Dad (surprised he hung around) keep watch while the pups eat and play. It seems like we have a family every year. They do make odd noises at night, but that is part of living with nature.

Off to start packing for this trip to gymnastics competition. it will be about a 4 hour drive. lots of good conversation time with daughter.

[Pavati]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi, All:

New Sunrise, I thought you were in Florida? Are there bears in Florida? That's news to me if so. I always imagine them in places where it gets cold cold in winter.

Slo, good news about your sister. Does she have a plan, sober meeting, someone to call or something? There are documentaries linked here somewhere called "Rain in my Heart," (I think you can find them on YouTube), that show the horrid effects of significant drinking. You can really see it as a disease through those because those people are losing EVERYTHING - their kids, their lives - and still drinking. Sometimes it can be a long, slow process to get that bad, but man they are sad. I'm glad your sister has you, but I think you know that you won't be able to save her. She's going to have to reach out her hand for help and save herself. Take good care of you during this hard time.

Belle - I feel you. I have periods of feeling like that. I've never been diagnosed with depression, but I have bouts of it. What being sober has helped me do is understand what is going on, accept where I am, and realized that it will lift as it always does. I used to get frustrated, and think that that feeling was going to be a long time, and I would try to drink my way out of it. Of course, drinking just makes it worse - biologically and psychologically. I also had a longer very FLAT period my first year sober (months 4 - 10). I just sort of felt generally blah. The pink cloud effect of the giddiness of new sobriety was over and I was mad and sad at myself for letting myself "get" to this point. Through plenty of reading, listening to podcasts, exercising, therapy, and connecting with sober nest moms, I came to realize that I am a good person who was vulnerable to alcohol for whatever reason. I sill had to accept that even if I felt blah I was not going to alcohol for a solution - that was NEVER going to work for me and the life I wanted. I know this is in you. I know you can and will do it. I hope you have a fabulous trip with your daughter, and consider the Byrdie triangle analogy when and if you are called. You can't control your husbands relationship with your son.

Pauly - sorry you are blah also. Have a great weekend, and take good care of yourself.

Sunrise- Can I get a whoot whoot! What a great feeling to have not even thought of "that" aisle. Celebration!

Byrdie - Hope Chicago is the best it can be. Will you get out in the city at all? I loved visiting there about two summers ago (although it was HOT).

Happy Friday to all I am not mentioning. No tickets to Boozeville here. We have family visiting so there will be a lot of driving to the in-laws and other places. And they talk A LOT! Serenity now.

Pav

[wagmor]

Re: Newbies Nest

Sunrise - congrats for sure on your journey into and back out of the war zone with nary a glance at the bomb aisle. That IS a huge accomplishment!

Belle - as others have said, I don't think you're whining at all. You've got a lot on your plate and sometimes it helps to just share. I would venture a guess that everyone here in the nest has been through perhaps not the same combo of events but through a similar time of stress and feeling down. The good news is that it will pass, and even better maybe that you can actually do some things to speed that along. It's possible there's something else going on for you besides the cumulative effects of al and then the body's process of returning to stasis. Have you thought about seeing your Dr or possibly a nutritionist or acupuncturist or similar? In the meantime, hugs to you...

Slo - glad to hear positive news about your sister, and here's hoping that this time is the charm for her. Maybe scared straight in a sense? The key, as you know, will be in putting together and following a plan.

Byrdie - hugs to you as you enter another weekend of work. When is the retirement party again???

Ava - I think I misread your previous post - I thought you'd received a definitive "no" on the pay raise, but after reading again I see that you're arming yourself with information to fight for one. Good for you! I'll look forward to hearing hopefully good news.

Nar - how did the interview go???


Hellos and waves to Pav, Lav, LC, Pauly, Gman, and everyone else stopping by the nest on this lovely day/eve.

[paulywogg]

Re: Newbies Nest

Slo,that's good news about your sister and like Pav said sometimes it just takes a bit longer for some of us to realize there's no going back,it reminded me of the times I'd drink and I'd have such terrible liver pain! A person with common sense would stop right there but no not me I'd just keep drinking til I felt no pain anywhere at all,sheer stupidity

[New Sunrise]

Re: Newbies Nest

Just on here browsing and I so tried to put a video on with our bears but it kept coming up with my FB page.

We do have lots of bears in Central Florida, Wildlife Commission deems our area with a 'prolific' bear population. They normally come out June to November and at night. There are highways being built all around us and so their habitat has been disturbed. They forage through garbage cans looking for food.

Slo, I am so glad to hear about your sister.

Belle, you are being kind...my boys were testosterone enraged morons! Thank God I did not drink then, believe it or not. I never started drinking till after they left the house.

[NoSugar]

Re: Newbies Nest

I'm sorry to hear that some of you are struggling with mental health issues (and, as addicts, don't we all??). I have found a series of you-tube videos on various problems really helpful. Here is the one on depression: Depression Disorders - Dr Bill Pettit - YouTube. The thing is, they all come down to essentially the same thing: mental illnesses are our response to something everyone experiences (but all respond to differently) physical and mental stress - how we internalize it and think about it. If you find the video helpful, there is a thread discussing the overall topic here: https://www.mywayout.org/community/g...on-thread.html.

Another thing to think about is what you are eating. Just like alcohol and any recreational drug or medication, food is a bunch of chemicals. In fact, many of our most powerful drugs have been isolated from plants -- the things we eat and assume are good for us. In several of my family members who have a problem with gluten (not all have an "official" celiac disease Dx), the mental effects are as bad or worse than the physical ones. After I started eating GF, I sometimes knew I had inadvertently consumed gluten well before the the hated poop issues were obvious because I'd become aware of OCD behavior, poor self-image, and a persistent, overwhelming feeling that "everyone" was mad at NoSugar. My sister's Ex used to know she had eaten gluten b/c of her personality change but when he would point this out, the normally calm sister would scream "I DID NOT!!!", and then realize she probably did...

Well, I was given fentenyl as part of a medical procedure yesterday. It took away any worry for me about liking opiates. I felt AWFUL - truly half-dead. Thankfully, the effects appear to have worn off and I have NO interest in more.

Hope all nesters enjoy your AF weekends! xx, NS

[Guitarista]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hola nesters,

Great post NS. I'll be sure to check out the vid. I agree and relate to all you've written above as this has also been my experience and results of my research over the years. thanks mi amiga.

Byrdy, sorry to hear about your neighbour. Hope the trade show isn't too heavy going. Safe travels.

Slo, all the best to your sister.

Belle, post/yap away my friend. Better out than in i reckon.

Nar, how was the interview? Did those wannabe's understand they had a superstar capable of anything and everything right there in their midst?!

Pav, my adventure begins when i'm on a plane May 30th! Yeehaw!

Big waves to evabody. Off to work here. Better git movin. No tickets in the mailbox.