Newbies Nest

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Greetings Nesters,

It’s cooled off quite a bit this evening so I’m out on the deck with my iPad, nice
We’ve grown some really nice strawberries this spring, now I’m trying to find ways to use them up without adding a ton of sugar. I’m working on some ideas.

Wags, hope the yard sale was a huge success. The last time we had one here the Amish showed up, tied their horse to the mailbox post & jumped right in haha! We need to do that again, it was fun.

Feral Pup, Congrats to you on your 6 weeks AF :welldone:
That’s huge, keep going.

G, sounds like you are having a great time.
When yous said ‘small town of 400,000 you were kidding, right??? LOL

Hi there Slo!

Murph, a good plan is essential! Don’t hesitate to leave early if you must.

Ava, I have a feeling Carl has adopted you
He sounds like he’s going to be a great friend for sure.

Hello to the rest of the crew & wishing everyone a safe night in the nest!
Lav

[Slo]

Re: Newbies Nest

I went to a drinking gathering on Friday evening, and brought a couple cans of a Forage brand of raspberry kombucha along, and it worked as a nice substitute! The only thing is I couldn’t fall asleep afterwards, so still not a perfect substitute. I suppose I’d have to learn how to make my own kombucha with decaf tea, and that sounds like a hassle.

[MENTION=24381]murph54[/MENTION], I hope the wedding went ok for you last night. It’s hard to weather a drunk fest...I mean a wedding...so early in your quit, but sometimes they’re hard to get out of; like you don’t want to hurt the bride & groom by not attending their nuptials, etc.

[MENTION=24351]New Sunrise[/MENTION], that’s intriguing that 5 years into your cigarette quit, you don’t think about them and you hate the smell. And actually, wine does start smelling bad for many of us awhile into stopping drinking it.

My sister is doing well! She started the intensive aftercare program this week that she was so reticent about, and it has been good! She has an actual addiction psychologist, and a competent & caring counselor/group leader. They are shocked at her stories of the abusive “treatment” programs that she has been through, that leave her worse off. Finally, she’s getting some real help!

[New Sunrise]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good Morning All!

Yesterday was busy here, finally finished my table and hubby came home. I had to throw dinner together so that we could eat on TV tables. He is used to big, family style meals when he comes home. A big oopsy for me but the table is ready to come in and be reassembled, but now for the chair seats. We can use the bar stools at the table.

I am in a funky mood this morning and I can't quite put my finger on it. Drama that I am trying to stay away from and still so much up in the air. First daughter and boy friend are kind of cooled off now. Not sure what is going on, but she will tell me when she is ready. I have not figured that one out. Hubby came home and I told him we have to discuss the bedding situation for his sister and the girls. While he was on the road he talked some with sister and now she will take her two week vacation, hubby and girls will be with her, and they will work their way down to us making visits with his other brothers. When they will come, how long they will be here is up in the air. It is too much and have thrown my hands up, what ever.

I heard from son this week, just texts and it is so hard to read between the lines with texts. He is on the west coast so he could surely communicate with me without GF knowing and it was just an exchange of pleasantries like nothing has gone on. It was nice but weird at the same time. Our relationship has changed and I just don't know what to say about that one either.

No drinking thoughts for yesterday, just confusion. I am not going to step full into everyone's business, but something just feels off.

Murp, I sure thought of you yesterday and hope that all went well. I know you could do it and it sounds like you have made some smart observations with your family. I mentioned before that my brothers are both alcoholics and drinking themselves into the grave. They will not admit it but especially my older brother is in bad shape. I don't want to go there and it is best to call this what it is, alcoholism. Alcohol sure made my life unmanageable.

Pav and Matt, I know what you mean about regular drinkers, how do they stop when it is time to stop, and say no when it is right to say no. Now I must admit, there were times that I would throw out a half a glass of wine and think to myself that an alcoholic would not do that. I had to think of all the glasses I had before that which were way too many.

Slo, I am glad that your sister is doing better and getting the help she needs. Now the smell of wine, I have not been that close to an open bottle in weeks now and still don't trust myself. I hope that the smell of wine turns my stomach, but with some of the intense cravings I have had I do not want to test fate. I just stay way and that is best for now.

Kensho, good luck with your car. I sure hate unexpected expenses. The new HVAC was quite a hit to us. Last Dec the washer went out on us and now the dryer is acting up. I have not mentioned the dryer to hubby, yet. I just put it on time dry now and it works. As long as it works I will keep that bit of news to myself.

Feral- Way to go on 6 weeks! :welldone::hug: It is hard work and you have done well!

Guitarista, your trip sounds fantastic. I wish we could have seen the pics but your description is wonderful.

Avail, I am so glad that Carl is becoming a great joy in your life. Nothing like a fur baby. I do not envy you the cooler weather, but I will envy you when cooler weather comes to us. It is plain old hot and muggy here and I don't mind a bit!

Hello to everyone I have missed! I am so glad that everyone is here and so appreciative of the support with all share with one another. I couldn't do it without you!

Today is laundry day, and work around the house. I can't wait to bring the table back in this afternoon. I will have to cook something good for hubby tonight.

Happy Sober Sunday All!

[FeralPuppy]

Re: Newbies Nest

Just a quick Sober Sunday thank you (!!!!!!) to everyone here for their support and good wishes. Right back atcha! It's so great that people with significant AF time stick around to inspire us newcomers.

Last night was an easy one as I hoped it would be. I really don't know if my very gradual reduction of drinking amounts and occasions has helped me out on this quit or not. I've gotten so used to not drinking with dinner out, during the day, in company, etc etc. I stopped day-drinking about 15 years ago, and I even phased out wine over the last 10-12 months since the crummy cheap wine I could afford to drink in bulk started to just taste bad... Plus I realized in my early 20s that social drinking was not for me since it always seemed like I was the only one getting hammered and that was, you know, awkward...!

And then this relationship I'm currently in became so important that I realized that, in the famous words of Narilly, I could either have the life I wanted OR I could drink. The reduction has been slow as I kept hoping that I could keep my drinking at some elevated level or another, but it became increasingly clear that I could not. A lesser amount of disfunction was just not going to cut it (go figure! :eek-new. So here I am!

[Byrdlady]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good afternoon, all
everyone sounds great.
Mr G, I don’t know how you do it. Just go to a foreign country and start playing music in the midst of it all. Maybe it’s because I can’t sing a lick. I admire your fearlessness!
Kensho, that sucks about your car. I hate it when I do stuff like that. Dang it!
Packing for my Anaheim trip next Tuesday. It’s going to be a long week. I’m glad there is one thing I don’t have to worry about...my booze supply (and all the chaos associated with it)
Hope everyone has a peaceful day. Byrdie

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Sunday evening greetings everyone!

The temp is dropping quickly so I guess rain is on the way. I prefer night time rain anyway, haha!

Slo, that’s really great news about your sister. I truly hope she does well.

New Sunrise, bowing out of your adult kids lives is the only sane thing to do - been there & done that. They have to make their own choices, all we can do is hope they remember everything we tried to teach them

Feral Pup, great that you’re feeling strong in your quit. I think the crowd mentality around here helps a lot

Byrdie, heading to Anaheim? Are you going to get a chance to see Disneyland? Probably not. I wish you a safe & wonderful trip friend!

Hello to all the rest of the Nesters & wishing everyone a safe night!

Lav

[HappyHealthyFuture]

Re: Newbies Nest

Just registered need to figure out how to navigate my way around. Any advice is appreciated

[abcowboy]

I think you’ve started off in a great thread [MENTION=24384]HappyHealthyFuture[/MENTION]! You’re going to find everyone more than happy to help and offer support as you move forward, but have a read around all the threads and jump in wherever you want, you’ll be welcomed everywhere! And it’s great to see another Canadian on the sobriety wagon!

[Pavati]

Re: Newbies Nest

HI, All:

Welcome, HappyHealthy! You've found a good spot to come to get support to get rid of alcohol. You can read back here, check out other active threads, and tell us a bit about yourself. We're a mish mosh of people from all over taking it one day at a time.

New Sunrise - you did a great synopsis for all the posts I wish I could write but don't have the time for just now. I think Lav is more practical than I am, but I would take those texts as good signs that he wants to keep a line of communication open. I think you're right to keep it simple, but maybe this crazy girlfriend will go away?? Maybe not, also. Parenting is so weird. You have all this control and responsibility for what they do, and then they become people in their own right, and we don't get ANY say at all. We can just hope we somewhere in there helped, but who knows...

Byrd - you'll be a long way south, but the whole state is in a DRY heatwave right now. It is supposed to cool down starting Tuesday, so good timing. Hope you enjoy at least some and aren't stuck in a conference.

Slo, glad your sis is better.

G - What an amazing trip. Maybe travel blogging could be your new profession - you certainly make me want to be there...

Off to get dinner for my family. I like cooking, and my husband doesn't mind cleaning so we make a good team.

Happy SOBER Sunday,
Pav

[HappyHealthyFuture]

Re: Newbies Nest

Thanks abcowboy, appreciate it eh

[HappyHealthyFuture]

Re: Newbies Nest

haha just realized I don't have to reply separately to posts

Pavati - Thank you for the Welcome, appreciate it! Drinking to the point that is excessive, sneaky, dangerous and is causing me financial issues. I have to pry myself away from the bottle. Hubby is now on board, we have talked off and on all weekend about it. I think he's finally getting it. He has an off button, I don't. I've been wanting to quit for a very long time and I keep waiting for the right time, it never happens. I got a month in awhile ago but went on vacation and thought I'd stop when I got back but nope. My addiction is a worse problem than I realized and I'm scared.

[KENSHO]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi HappyHealthy! Welcome! We were all where you are at one point. It was scary leaving behind alcohol, my friend (and coping mechanism for every possible situation imaginable)! But now with 500+ days alcohol free, life is better than I ever imagined it. Not perfect or always happy, but better and more authentic and I like myself so much more. Have you found your way to the toolbox yet? It's packed with years worth of stellar posts and ideas and ways to cope with this change. There's a link to it in Byrdlady's signature line - if you go back a page or two you'll find her.

I ran across this article. Not advocating for this site because I know nothing about it, but I liked the discussion about functional alcoholics. I was definitely one. And, as it turns out, so are many others:

Brad Pitt on Being Sober and What It Means for Functional Alcoholics

[HappyHealthyFuture]

Re: Newbies Nest

Kensho, thank you for the Welcome and link. Congrats on 500+ days, I'm seriously envious in a good way. I will check out the toolbox, thanks for that. It's nice to see that Brad Pitt is being open about his addiction.

[wagmor]

Re: Newbies Nest

HappyHealthyFuture - Welcome to MWO and especially to the nest! Yep, we've pretty much all been in shoes similar to yours - the shoes of a new quit - either recently or awhile ago, and for many of us we wore them multiple times. Be sure to check out the Tool Box (see link in my signature line) for loads of great posts that have been identified as particularly helpful for starting or maintaining a non-drinking life. Really glad you're here.

G - your trip sounds fabuloso so far. I can't wait until you get to Peru - I was there in 2001 and am looking forward to reliving my own adventures while also hearing about yours. And how the hell is 2001 already so long ago???

Byrdie - safe travels to Anaheim. Hope you don't have to drive much - traffic in that whole part of CA is a nightmare! Hooray for not having to pack or think about booze though. Another win for the Byrd-book!


The yard sale was a smashing success! We made over $400 and got a good amount of stuff OUT of the house and garage. I'll be dropping off the remains to donate today. Now we just need to do that again 2-3 more times. Sad part is, we actually have nowhere near the amount of stuff that a lot of people have, and yet here we are with too much of it nonetheless.

Three days of work and then we're off for our short 3-night trip to one of the fire lookouts I've mentioned. This one is near an old growth grove of doug fir trees and otherwise pretty spectacular hiking. Can't wait!

Have great starts to your weeks everyone!

[KENSHO]

Re: Newbies Nest

Morning Nest! I'm waiting for a client to show up... have a few minutes to check in.

Wags, we visited a fire lookout in Montana - those huge skies and views... I can imagine staying in one would be spectacular. Will there be people visiting, or do you get it to yourselves? Sounds wonderful.

We have a garage sale this Friday... I absolutely love getting rid of things that we don't need. "Stuff" is such a hinderance to energy flow in a space if not needed or wanted.

HJappyHealthy, you can get to 500 by putting one foot in front of the other!! There's a reason they say one day at a time.