Newbies Nest

[Pavati]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi, All:

NoSugar, I love your posts. Thanks for that - I needed it. I love your take on recent changes. No use worrying about what is. My mom (who lives close) and I were talking about how back in the 1800s a son or daughter would move west and you'd never see him or her again. We're lucky we have FaceTime and email, etc., to at least keep in touch better.

Sunrise - Sorry you're down. Good news - you'll come back up eventually. You know what makes you feel better - not just in the moment. NOT alcohol. Stay strong.

Belle - I don't know what chalk painting is other than the sidewalk chalk art festivals I've seen. You can do it on furniture? I'm going to check that out.

I am grateful for this weekend. Time to clean the sheets and dust the cobwebs. Whoot!

Happy SOBER Saturday!
Pav

[New Sunrise]

Re: Newbies Nest

Afternoon All,

I just thought I would check in. Thanks Pav and you are right about the ups and downs. Sometimes hubby leaves and it is harder then other times. IDK.

I did do all that I could on my list. The furniture is stripped but the wood is still soft from the stripper so I need to wait for it dry out before I can sand it. The humidity is very high here right now so that will take the night, I am sure. I did do a few things around the house and now to figure something good for dinner. I have some chicken so I guess that will be put on the grill.

When I got on here last night I first checked FB because a dear fellow who I taught with had his parents living with him because of their failing health. He is such a good guy, around my son's age, and just loved his parents with everything he had. His mother was put in the hospital last week with a blood infection that she could not shake and unfortunately passed last night. I did not realize till after I got off here and gave one last look. He, his sister, and father are just heartbroken, as I am for them. Funny thing is I thought it was just him and his sister and I thought they were such a wonderful family. It turns out he has a brother that doesn't seem to have anything to do with his family. Where I envied them for such a close family, I don't feel so bad now. Family is who you are close too, even if they aren't blood.

I hope everyone is having a great Sober Saturday! Time for me to shower and get dinner together! I want to find something different to do with that chicken.

[Byrdlady]

Re: Newbies Nest

Yesterday morning at at 2:20am, a series of texts came in on my phone. My 8:30 am flight had been cancelled. I sprang up and clicked on the link to rebook another flight. What an ordeal on a cell phone. The next option was at 11am, getting me home at 11pm. I wasn’t thrilled, but I took it. I got up and got ready and began to think that I was being charged for both flights. I broke down and called our travel folks. She said that it was an 11 o’clock flight, THE NEXT DAY! She got me rerouted thru Dallas and I got the last seat on the last flight heading this way. Instead of flying out of LAX, I would now go out of John Wayne. By about 4:30 am, I’m ready and packed. I thought I could potentially get a couple more hours of sleep. I laid down and closed my eyes. My brain was having nothing to do with this attempt at relaxing. So I thought that I may as well get on over to the airport, I summonsed an Uber and was there by 5am. A little breakfast was in order. I walk by McDonald’s and a couple more eateries, I set my sites on a place called Ruby’s Diner. (My dog is Rubi, with an i). Even at this hour, they were packed. I found a stool at the bar of this old fashioned diner. I sat next to a lady about my age. About midway thru our meals, a guy comes up and orders a Chardonnay. ”6 ounce or 9?”, asked the crusty waiter. “9”, he said. He paid the bill and left. I thought about this for a few minutes and finally said to the lady, “Under what circumstances is Chardonnay at 6 am ok?” We had a chuckle. She asked where home was, and I told her NC. I said I was in LA for the National Retail Federation trade-show. She said that she was, too. She asked who I worked for, and I told her. She said She works for a company called ______. I said, you HAVE to be kidding, I worked there for 28 years! I asked her name, which I didn’t recognize and old her mine. She asked when I left and I said 3 years ago, she said that’s when she came in, she took XYZ’s place. I said he was my boss! Turns out, he got fired in the next round of layoffs! She asked how I liked it where I am, I said in many ways, it reminds me of the old company we used to work for, a very good company, but my heart is still with my roots, shoplifting deterrents (not intrusion alarms). I asked if they had any opportunities in NC, she said she might have! We exchanged business cards and asked me to connect with her on Linked In, which I did, and she accepted. This morning, I sent her a note saying how incredible it was that we met. She agreed and said that she had asked one of the guys I asked her about and he said, “OH I LOVE HER’. That was nice to hear! So I don’t know if anything will come out of it or not but what are the odds!?
Ive thought a lot about the guy ordering Chardonnay at 6am. I can’t come up with a single plausible justification of his order other than the fact that he is surely one of us. If I’d have had time, I would have shown NoSugar the wine shop I used to visit when I had a layover in Charlotte. In fact, that’s WHY I connected in Charlotte. All I can say is that I’m glad I’m not that guy.
I got in at midnight. Needless to say, I’m beat So glad to be home.
Do whatever it takes to break free of this addiction. I promise, it’s worth it.
Here is the view from my room
37B87384-5728-457D-A92D-466CD320B619.jpg

[NoraC]

Re: Newbies Nest

Byrdie - I didn't know you were in my neck of the woods! Fingers crossed that this chance meeting turns out to be the best thing. And how great that you got and NS got to hug each other. Brought tears to my eyes. :heartbeat:
Sad to say, that I once thought a blood mary or a glass of champagne would have been ok to drink at 6 am. Now, I just shudder and turn a little green.

:checkin: I hope that everyone is having a happy day

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good evening Nesters,

Byrdie, I worked night shift for a number of years & never would have thought about drinking at that hour. Working nights makes you nauseous enough, no need to drink on top of that. The meeting you had with that person sounds like a wonderful gift from the universe. I hope it turns into something fabulous for you

Hi Nora, good to see you

Pav, hope you got all those cobwebs, haha!! Such fun stuff!

New Sunrise, that’s great that your daughter found a possible summer position. I hope it comes thru for her.
Staying busy keeps me from overthinking things (another former bad habit). I seem to find enough variety around here to keep me happy. If worse comes to worse I just go outside & watch my chickens for a while. Sounds weird but they are entertaining

I had one grandson here for half the day, took him home & brought the other one over. It’s better when they are here separately (no fighting) LOL
Wishing everyone a safe night in the nest!

Lav

[Witchywoman9]

Re: Newbies Nest

hi Renewal
i remember you from before, when I was just Witchywoman, i'm trying to come back, cause I'm worried that if I don't make it this time, I wont make it

[Slo]

Re: Newbies Nest

Byrdie, I flew into Dallas on Friday too, at 7p -maybe we intersected at the airport also!
Wonderful news about the chance encounter and possibility of switching back to your old company!

Sunrise, I tried a clever dish with chicken today: fried chicken on a waffle, topped with syrup & gravy! Well it was new to me anyways.
I too loved your story of the too-short, makeshift chair for your younger brother, just like Brick’s chair on ‘The Middle”! I absolutely loved that show. So glad my sister introduced me to it, because I actually don’t like a lot of the shows on TV. That one was a gem.

Yay, Over-It is over it again and back!! Velcro in real tight now.

It’s going really well visiting my daughter & her fiancé here in Texas. They have been kind enough to make it a completely AF visit!

Have a safe night in the nest, everyone!

[available]

Re: Newbies Nest

Evening nesters

Welcome back over it and Witchy. Im with you witchy, when i gave up i knew i had to, my brother died from al and i could see myself very vividly going down the same path. With the help of MWO and pure grit i am happy to be 5 1/2 years sober and hate al with a vengeance. Keep on here and you cant go wrong.

Slo i am so happy for you that your family showed the respect you deserve by not drinking. Its great when others realise you are serious in your choices.

Byrd, well that was amazing that all of that happened and you sat next to a woman from your old company. It surely means you will move on to something better and less demanding. i have everything crossed for you.

Lav, lucky you having your grandsons to love and spoil.

This weekend i had one son who lives a couple of hours away come and visit. i mentioned this to my eldest daughter and she said she wanted to see him which was a bit of a shock as they dont really get on (more her than him) and it was so nice he stayed an extra night and she came and spent time with him. this morning i called my other daughter who was crying and really upset so i drove in and picked her up. Sadly she could be one of us. When she drinks she cant have one or two it has to be 100 or more. i had a good chat to her and said i was like her once until i crossed the line and al became my whole focus and i didnt want her to become like me. There are times like these i feel so guilty that they saw me drink and appear to have fun and maybe i have in some way contributed to their drinking but i now can show them that it is a good life being sober, that i will never lose anything due to drinking now. Its affecting her relationship and thats not good, she sees that. so i am going to book an apt for her to see a psychologist that i see and go from there. Al is everywhere and i cant imagine not drinking in my 20's but i dont want her to become what i become, i want her to be like i am now and to save herself the pain and heartache of crossing that line and she will cross it one day. I am happy i can be there for my children and now set an example of life without al.

Still not well so think another day off work is in order.

Where are you Belle and LC?

Take care xx

[Witchywoman9]

Re: Newbies Nest

thank you...im not in good place but I want to be free from all of it

[Pavati]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi, All:

I'm sorry you're not in a good place right now, Witchy, but stick tight and it will be a new beginning for you. I don't think any of us were in a good place when we came here. Are you safe right now? Do you need anything immediately? I recommend a lot of water, a good soak in a bath, whatever food you want, and some good sleep. Gradually you'll feel better. Keep posting and reading here if you need. I listened a lot to the Bubble Hour and took long walks also.

Overit, you, too. I'm so glad to see that ole paper bag mug of yours. I hope you're feeling ok, and ready to make this change that will forever change your life. Welcome back, and here's the butt velcro.

Byrdie - love that story. I hope it turns into something for you. I was guilty of drinking in the mornings at airports - not if it was a work trip. My excuse was my fear of flying, so I "needed" something to calm me down. As you always say, those WEREN'T the days...

Sunrise - family to me has always been family AND friends who are family.

Slo - great that you get an alcohol-free visit!

I'm off to help my mom today and then to celebrate Father's Day with my FiL (who is difficult at best) and husband. I feel like I need one more day in this weekend...

Pav

[New Sunrise]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hello All,

Happy Father's Day to all in the nest, though most of us are women. I really feel sometimes that Dads are not always appreciated like moms. Moms are the total hands on parent but Dads do a lot that is not recognized. I see that now looking back at my own dad and how my husband's girls can not even give him the time of day. We both raised some spoiled children. My daughter does make sure that we are both appreciated.

Bryd, that is such a cool story! A lady that I once worked with used to call those coincidences GODcidences. I always liked that. It sure was an ordeal to get home but sounds like it is worth it!

Witchy, we have all been in 'the bad place' and you can do it, we are here for you.

Avail- it is great that your son and daughter got together like that and you got to visit with them. It is always great to have your kids visit home. Time flies when they were little. I would love to have just one day back with them when they were little and I could keep up with them. I am sorry about your daughter and I wonder sometimes about my son. I know he drank a tremendous amount in his 20's and I am wanting to believe he has calmed that down. There is such a difference in my kids ages that he never saw me drink when he was growing up. My daughter sure did and she saw her brothers drink too. With both my brothers and I alcoholics she just doesn't drink. I am so proud of her for that.

Slo- I really like "The Middle" also. The chaos in the house reminds me of the chaos that would go on in our house, it was just a more organized chaos. They play the reruns during the day and for the life of me, I have missed it every time. My daughter told me how it ends but I would just like to see it for myself.

Another lonely day here . I sure wish that I was with my hubby. I hate that he is away for Father's Day, he really deserves a special day. He is up north and found a National Park to go to and their weather is great so maybe he can get some good pictures today. I know I mentioned his photography before and he slowed down on that quite a bit. He does have a great eye for some really great shots.

I am kind of done for the day. The humidity here is really high and it not the best time to be working with wood. I got everything sanded and stained but I am sure it will take the day for that to set. It looks like I will be putting polyurethane on at night when the humidity is down some. I have to keep side door open and I really don't look forward to any critters wandering in. The last two morning we have had a young armadillo rooting around the front yard. They really can become nuisances if they nest by your house, as long as it keeps going I am okay.

I do hope everyone has a great Sober Sunday. I may just get a chance to swim today. We will see.

[narilly]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good morning everyone, I am back home after my daughter’s graduation. It was really nice and AL wasn’t a thing. My hubby hardly drinks now which is great. Of course the kids went out on grad night and partied so were a bit hungover the next day when we went out for breakfast.
They don’t drink like I used to which is great.
Ava, I hope you can help your daughter, it’s scary when our kids have our drinking tendencies. My son has them for sure but he is aware of it I think.

Hello Witchy, welcome. Yes baths are good and walks, Pav knows what she is talking about. Just take it day by day and don’t look too far ahead.

Yay Byrdie! I hope you get a better opportunity.

Have a good one everybody and don’t drink today.

[Byrdlady]

Re: Newbies Nest

SLO, that is nuts that you and I were in the Dallas airport at 7pm on Friday! I wish I’d known! Even I didn’t know I was going to be there until that morning! Virtual hugs to you!

Pav, I think you are right, by the time we get to an online forum for problem drinking, we are all in a very bad place. MWO is like Baggage Claim...it’s time to claim the problem and address it. It’s a very important first step! When I was in my closet taking gulps out of a hidden vodka bottle, I knew I had a problem but didn’t WANT to address it. I was in denial. Once I got here and realized I wasn’t alone (and my fears that I really had a drinking problem were validated), I was able to gain some confidence and gather the tools needed to fight this battle. As Matt says, I couldn’t do it alone. I didn’t get it on my first try, or even my 30th, but I kept trying until it finally stuck. I did not give up.

Hope everyone one is having a relaxing Father’s Day.
Hugs to all, Byrdie

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good evening Nesters,

Hope everyone had a good Father’s Day

Welcome back Witchywoman!
Settle in the nest & stay put as long as you like. You deserve a happy, healthy AF life too, like all of us.

Slo, glad to hear your trip is going well, AF

Ava, sorry to hear about your daughter. She is lucky to have you as a role model.
Getting to the bottom of the reason(s) why we drank like we did is truly helps us find our way out. Sending you both a big hug :hug:

Hello to Pav, New Sunrise, Byrdie, Narilly & everyone.

Wishing everyone a safe night in the nest ~ velcro in if necessary!!

Lav

[KENSHO]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi Everyone! It's amazing to me that with as many people there are in the world, and that we all live in such different places, that several people are able to cross paths! Amazing!

Ava, glad you can be a good example for your daughter. I truly think people need to see that we can be functioning happy people without alcohol!

New Sunrise, sorry you feel so lonely when your husband goes. I'm not sure where you live, but are there other people there that you can develop relationships with and spend time with so you don't feel so alone? It might help if there are others that can help fill the connection piece that your husband does?

Welcome Witchy! There is a good live on the other side of the bummer you feel now. I promise!

After a week that was pure adrenaline and kicked my butt, we arrived at the hotel in North Carolina at 4:30am. Frontier sucks serious butt. I will never fly them again!

But we are now at a lovely VRBO that is charm to the max in the mountains. There is a tower and a tree house and round windows and special little areas everywhere. I'm currently in a window seat, looking out over the jungle hills and watching Indiana Jones. Just the ticket I need to relax and catch up with the adrenal fatigue I'm sure I have again.

The owner left beer in the fridge which my husband has enjoyed (but not too much), but also left a bottle of wine on the table for us. Husband won't drink that, so I hid it from view. I feel a little sad though that I don't have anything interesting to drink, as we forgot to get anything at the grocery store. UG! I know I shouldn't feel like I'm missing out. And I'm very tired still. The kids want me to play but I'm just worn out. In a couple days I'll be ready to do more. SO I need to dig up some tea or something more than water and just give myself time to rest and heal from this stupidly busy week!

I'll be ok, helps to come here and tell you all! And remember why I decided to become a non drinker. It's not worth any sense of "relax" or "joining" or "romantic wine sipping in a new place". The reality would be ugly and I would dislike myself immediately.

Off to cook dinner. Glad we have visitors on this site that haven't been here in awhile... glad you're here!