Newbies Nest

[Guitarista]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hola friends

Another big congrat's to Slo and Wags! Raaawkin this thing called life. Oh yeah! :llama:

Ava, your son's friend will just have to realise for every action there is a reaction. We can't just booze on somewhere, anywhere without picking up the tab at some point. There are consequences eventually. I hope he can reflect on this situation and have a good think on where he wants to go in life. have a beaut day mi amiga.

Quote from NS' above post -

'The ability to forget the bad stuff is probably a necessary human trait to allow the species to survive - women who can remember what it was like might not be willing to have more than one baby!!

As I've said many times before, our rose-colored memories are baked into the system. I think it is why programs such as AA promote continued participation. Without reminders, most of us will minimize how bad things were and with that, open ourselves up to making choices most of us will regret.'

Great explanation re memory, survival of the species and having babies. That's a simple and powerful way to think of this. Thanks NS!

Day 3 hundred and *&^%! but i never been one fo countin'.

Hope all are doing ok out there. Take time out for yourself today and do something you love. L8tr g8trs.

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good evening Nesters,

We had another not so extremely hot day today, I could get used to this
My chickens still look forward to their afternoon snack of cold watermelon slices though, haha!!

G, we’re waiting patiently for your 1 year anniversary to get here. I’ll have to get Byrdie to bake up a guitar cake

Ava, I would pay to NOT go a a 30th birthday party these day, Lol

NS, I feel like I have almost completely rebuilt myself over the past 10+ Years. My goal has been to live my (new) life as fully as possible without the AL or smokes of course. I don’t want to spend any time dwelling on the past, it’s gone & done. I have zero desire to place myself back in any addiction behavior. Why on earth would I?

Pav, a 24 hr break sounds just fine to me. I haven’t done that in a very long time.
I’m enjoying the weather break here but I know PA - hot & dampness rules, it will be back, ugh.

Hello Pauly & Mr V & everyone.
Wishing a safe night in the nest for all!

Lav

[Byrdlady]

Re: Newbies Nest

Happy Friday, nesters!
For some reason, yesterday, I was looking back at some posts in the nest from 2012 and 2013. Gosh, the number of people who have come here seeking help and then left without a trace. I do wonder if they have been able to tame this awful beast or learn to live with it, at least. THOUSANDS of people on the member list. I think back to how long it took me to actually take a step to get help, it was a LONG time coming and even then, it took a year (and an ultimatum) to get me to stop. This is an extremely powerful and deadly addiction, and as much as I sometimes downplay it in my mind, there is nothing flippant about it. It takes WORK to break free and continuous support to STAY FREE, I think. There are rare birds who do it on their own and live the rest of their lives AF, but I don't know many, if any. I thank my lucky stars that I live in a time where I can get support 24/7 if needed, right here online.
Let's go put the FRI in Friday! It's just another day, not a ticket to BoozeVille! :rara::rara::rara: Byrdie

[wagmor]

Re: Newbies Nest

Thanks for all the congrats everyone - it's wonderful to come on here and read your messages. I honestly think, though, that the best way we can each celebrate each other's quits is by maintaining our own and being in the nest. I'm sure some of us would have stayed sober without this group but I for one am really glad I didn't have to try! Seriously, each of us coming here and sharing in the good fight makes us all stronger. So thanks for maintaining all of your quits as well - not only am I super happy for each of you, but I'm also grateful in return :heartbeat:

Pav - hooray for your 24-hour break from technology. It's so wonderful, isn't it? That's one of the biggest benefits of the camping and fire lookout vacations we've been taking - there's no signal, so no choice, and it really is refreshing to not feel tethered to a device of any kind.

Lav, G and Byrdie - I'd chip in on the guitar cake! Can't wait to celebrate one year with our biggest RawkStar!!!

NS - well put about the rose colored memories and how that tendency helps us survive. Our brains are fascinating and they do so many things to protect us. I'd never thought about it in this context. I wonder if our brains realize that those same rose-colored memories of drinking, while definitely less taxing to carry with us on the daily, actually contribute to many people's downfalls cuz they think "I wasn't so bad..."???

Kensho, you out there??? Hope you are well.


Hellos and waves to everyone stopping by the nest today. Have fantastic Fri-days and eves!

[NoSugar]

Re: Newbies Nest

I wonder if our brains realize that those same rose-colored memories of drinking, while definitely less taxing to carry with us on the daily, actually contribute to many people's downfalls cuz they think "I wasn't so bad..."???

I definitely think this happens to me, @wagmor. My current "feeling" is that I wasn't that bad so I have to consciously and intellectually force myself to remember things like:
- drinking from the spigot of a box of wine in a dark corner of my kitchen
- dropping off empty small wine bottles in trash cans in the park as I RODE MY BIKE TO THE GYM IN MY ONGOING EFFORT TO LOOK AS GOOD AS POSSIBLE AND PROVE TO EVERYONE INCLUDING MYSELF THAT I WAS BETTER THAN FINE!
- rewatching TV shows that I had watched with others the night before so I could comment on what happened
- having packages arrive that I did not remember ordering
- stopping most outside activities and interests if they occurred post-5 pm
- having very little time each day when I wasn't recovering from, planning to, or actively drinking
And of course I could go on and on. I no longer feel the shame and desperation but any sane person (which I now am, again, thank goodness!) can look over that list and know that drinking is not an option.

Sometimes we have to force ourselves to strip off those rose-colored glasses, look back, and remember the truth of what alcohol did to us.

I will be at a place with no TV, cell service, or internet late next week and weekend. I honestly don't think I've ever been in this situation before. It sounds like those of you who have done it like it. We'll see how it goes :smile:

[Pavati]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi, All:

The other oppositional force is our loved ones. Well, somewhat. If we can forget how bad it was, imagine them? People I love still think I quit just because I'm a control freak, or oddly focused on achievement. My husband knows I can/should never drink again, but not too many other people in my life do. Another reason it is great to "hang out" with other sober people, even virtually. I'm with you, Wags. Other people's sobriety really helps my own.

I made a delicious and healthy dinner last night - I love being on vacation. I just need an extra hour a night that I don't have when I work full time. I know people do it, I just get so tired that I fall back on the easy fix. I'm going to try to remember this feeling when I go back to work and try to do some better meal planning. We always try, but then we get a wrench thrown into the mix.

I'm off on another excursion and probably won't have access to check in for a few days. I know for sure I won't be drinking. Y'all take care of yourselves, too.

xo
Pav

[Guitarista]

Re: Newbies Nest

NS. You'll have to bring a guitar or ukelele with you.

A working weekend for me. It's just the weekend, not a ticket to boozeville.

Don't believe the hype. Don't believe the pipe. The truth is in our hearts and minds ain't it? Trust in your truth.

Hello to evabody.

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Greetings Nesters,

It actually cooled down enough that I was willing turn cook on the grill today, haha! First time this summer too.
We pulled the cover off the grill & decided it needed some housekeeping before we could cook. Yeah, there was a nice fluffy mouse nest in the bottom of the grill. Some lucky creature had a pretty good winter in there, lol.

Way way back before we had kids we used to camp in isolated places & did just fine without phones or anything else. Then things changed when we found we were both on call for work & had to respond immediately if not sooner.
I think it would be nice to do that for a day or two provided we’re both healthy & don’t need a 911 call haha!

NS, I actually had forgotten about the late night online shopping - I ended up buying some useless stuff too. SO grateful the only stuff that shows up at my door these days is what I know I purchased

We are heading out tomorrow to see a play that our granddaughter is in (Mary Poppins for kids). We are taking our younger grandson along with us because he needs a day out & away from his older brother. I hope his mood is pleasant, LOL
Wishing everyone a safe night in the nest!

Lav

[narilly]

Re: Newbies Nest

Happy Un Hung Saturday everyone.
So nice to wake up feeling good, I will always be grateful for that.

Belle, holy crap, that was a total sh.. show. How awful. I hope your son skids that girl.

Wags, I think it was you, Happy 3 years, yahoo!! Keep on keeping on.

Yeah, I like your list NS, don’t forget- waking up with bruises you don’t remember getting and coming downstairs in the morning and counting the number of wine bottles that were drank the night before. Ugh
Plus the hangover, there is always that.

Have a good sober working weekend G.
Hi Pav and Lav, have a great weekend too. Pav, your excursions sound fun and no booze sounds like a great idea.
Byrdie, is work getting any better?
Hi SLO, you are doing great..

Matt, hope you are doing ok in that hot weather, I guess everyone in the southern US is having hot weather. Hang in there and cool off with a nice glass of AL free lemonade or water.

We are having a neighbourhood party today. Just a BBQ, hanging out with the neighbours. I am the organizer so it’s going to be great, dammit. Haha

Have a good one and don’t drink today
xo

[lifechange]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi Nesters,
getting over terrible jet lag.. maybe it has to do with getting older, but I need a full week to feel even half way normal (brain wise)! How's it for you, G-man?
Next time, please remind me not to schedule embassy appts and work the day after returning!:happy2: Had a wonderful 14 hours of sleep last night and I'm planning for the same tonight.
I'm so happy for you, Wags, and am sending out a huge congrats on 3 years of freedom!
too you, too, Slo on your year milestone.. and hoping the wedding plans are going well for D3..
Pav, sounds like you're having a wonderful vacay.. making time for yourself and for cooking! You know I'm happy about that!
NS, it was so good to talk to you and the phone and your voice accompanies me..
Love to all of you.. Byrdie, Lav, Ava, Nar, Gman, Kensho, Belle, Matt, Pauly, everyone checking in today.. or flying by.
Looking forward to an Un-hung Sunday morning tomorrow. xx

[Guitarista]

Re: Newbies Nest

Yo friends.

Hiya LC. Welcome home. My jet lag was 30+ hours of zero sleep so i didn't miss connecting flights, plus didn't really sleep on plane. Fortunately i didn't have to be anywhere for a week upon my return. It took a few days for body clock to readjust as i was waking at 1 a.m. saying...'ok, i'm ready for the day, where is everyone?'! Glad u got a good sleep. Hope your weekend's a nice one and u had a good trip.

Working weekend for me, and not in the mood but that's ok. Day 320. Wow. And wow to Nora on 4 years! Congratulations Nora.

[Wine-no!]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi Everyone!
I’m just dropping in very quickly to say hi and say that I’ve just hit 1000 days AF! :-(
I’m just going to bed but will log on tomorrow and write a longer post.
Sorry I don’t post often but I do think of you guys and hope you’re doing well.
X

[Byrdlady]

Re: Newbies Nest

Wine No! 1000 days is epic! Nice work, keep up the pace! Thanks for checking in and sharing this big roundy with us!
:dancin: Byrdie

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good evening Nesters,

Just home from seeing granddaughter’s play, it was awesome.
I was only supposed to have 1 grandson today but ended up with 2, haha but it’s OK.

LC, so nice to see you posting!
I don’t think I’d do real well with jet lag anymore, it’s rough, to say the least. Catch up on your sleep

Wine No!, Congrats to you, 1000 awesome AF days, yay!

Hello to Narilly, G & Byrdie & everyone.

I have to go watch these boys before they tear my house down.
Wishing everyone a safe night in the nest!

Lav

[KENSHO]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good morning Nest. Great discussion on why we need a toolbox:

How to Build a Sobriety Toolbox (27 Tools Included!) | Tempest

My toolbox looks different than this one, but that’s the beauty of creating what works for us individually.