Newbies Nest

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good evening Nesters,

Sunny & nothing going on here, lucky I guess
When it comes to stubborn streaks I can assure mine is HUGE, haha! I decided to put it to good use when I quit.
I think I’ve actually used my stubbornness as a defense shield. I won’t let anything or anyone make me drink, never again.

Jvo, my stubbornness is aka Lavan-ittude! We all have it within ourselves, just bring out & protect yourself from the triggers of the world

Byrdie, I’m glad you’re planning to get out of the way of Dorian. I just donated to Mercy Corps after seeing the devastation in the Bahamas. God help those poor folks.

LC, I’m not a fan of public speaking myself, I understand your pain. I hope it all goes well for you & doesn’t become too stressful.

Kensho, glad you enjoyed your trip.

Hello to Wags, Pauly, Pav & everyone.
Wishing a safe night in the nest for all!

Lav

[narilly]

Re: Newbies Nest

Goodnight everyone and thanks for the nice thoughts. I think you made me blush
I am grateful to have you all in my life.

I am falling asleep so will post again soon.

Don’t drink today xo

[Pavati]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi, All:

Yes! The Lavan-tude. That's what gets me through pity parties. WWLD? What would Lav do? One of the things that sounds hokey but REALLY WORKS, is practice gratitude. Practice it every day, but especially during those pity parties. List all of the things you get from not drinking instead of focusing on what your alcoholic brain thinks you're missing. It works!

Byrdie - That hurricane is so scary. I'm sorry you have to evacuate but it is good you have a place in town to get to. Dorian is one slow-moving, destructive storm. Take good care. The videos and pictures I've seen from the Bahamas are terrible.

Mr. G! So close to one year. I'm leaving the baking to Byrdie, but I'll start planning the party.

LC - Glad to see you. You have a great perspective - be prepared. I've basically been a public speaker my whole career - I still get nervous and still HATE being on video. It will be smooth and you'll be great.

Happy SOBER Hump Day.

Pav

[wagmor]

Re: Newbies Nest

LC - one of my friends/colleagues is a counselor who works with some of my students who have severe test anxiety, and she says that type of anxiety (and yours) is actually a rational response when you're still in the "not prepared" stage of things. Your brain knows you're not finished with prep and thus it actually is doing its job quite properly (to protect you). She often recommends: "Reassure your brain that you are in the process of preparing - revisit your plan and give your mind solid anchor points or touchstones in the prep process, like I'll have my outline done by X date, I'll rehearse at least Y number of times, etc. If you don't have a thorough plan, put one together. Breathe." I know you've got this, but just like sobriety, use your plan to help you get over the rough spots. :hug:

Nar - belated comment re your work mate, but sending you support :hug:

Ava - yep, the year is flying by here too! Hope your transition back into work mode is easy.

Byrdie - thinking of you, stay safe and tell the woman who wants a call to bugger off!


Hellos and waves to everyone stopping by today.

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good evening Nesters,

Waiting to see if we actually do get a thunderstorm tonight, hope so. This humidity is getting bad again. I guess we’ll get what’s left of Dorian here sometime Friday. I feel better knowing Byrdie is in a safe place :hug:

Narilly, show us a picture of you blushing, haha! You know we all believe in you 100%!

Pav, I had to LOL at WWLD, ha ha!!!
I think most of you know what I would do in any scenario - stay on plan & screw everything & everyone else! How’s that for top advice

Wags, my lifelong fear of making an a$$ of myself kept me from doing a lot of things. I think the leftover PTSD from childhood had a lot to do with that. I actually was able to talk to a group of people, maybe a dozen or less. But the big crowd thing, oh no, not me.

I was just outside trying to pull some weeds but the heat/humidity & the aching lower back decided otherwise. The weeds will remain, haha!
Wishing everyone a safe night in the nest!

Lav

[jvo]

Re: Newbies Nest

Evening all,

G, let the countdown begin! Well, I’m sure you’ve been counting down for awhile as you should. We will def have a party for ya.

WWLD? Love that!

I’m pooped. A mix of emotional stuff and some physical that has to do with lack of sleep. I will get on my night routine now. I do love the structure I’ve made in my schedule. Love it. But now I can do it because no kid to take care of daily, to take to practice, watch games...I do miss that stuff, but I’m glad it’s all about taking care of me. Well, at least until he texts and says he needs me. I do get that from time to time and treasure it.

Have a good night.

[Guitarista]

Re: Newbies Nest

No pity parties here anymore. They seem to have left the building. But it'll be a wild party we're talkin' bout this tuesday! I'd best be careful of WWLD thinking in this case.....e.g. 'screw everything and everyone else'! lol. Just jivin' pardners.

Byrdy, how's it going there?

Jvo. You really are rocking this thing. Keep it going mi amiga.

Thanks Pav! It couldn't be in better hands.

LC. How are you? Wags makes some good points. I run groups around mental health stuff at work and i'm pretty much put on the spot to deliver every time. I do have some natural ability for yapping and communicating, but i have found it's essential i know the subject and have an idea of where i want to take it. It's mostly in my head these days, but sometimes i'll jot down some bullet points to keep me and the group on track, and improvise around that. Even showing a video or some slides/powerpoint stuff can help and flesh out the session taking the pressure off you whilst still delivering the info. One way is to just keep it simple, short and sweet, delivering the info that you want to deliver. With some simple easy preparation which will reduce stress big time. But you're a class act so it'll be no problem. The audience will be fortunate to have you speak.

Take it easy out there evabody Bejos.

[available]

Re: Newbies Nest

Evening nesters

Well its funny how 4 days at work makes the memories of a nice relaxing holiday disappear. Tomorrow i am working from home as i decided i am going to do that. Just doing all the emails has taken all week to get on top off.

Wags, trying not to get stressed, spent a lot of time this week catching up with people i like, in between work that is. One of my doctors is pregnant and i am so happy for her. 41 and a total suprise as she broke up with the guy who lives o/s. she has struggled to be accepted into a mans domain as a neurologist and i thought she would never have children, neither did she, so we will all having something exciting to focus on.

Bryd dont work on your holiday, the best advice i could give you. everything can wait but for some reason i just cant practice what i preach lol.

LC you will be great, i would need 15 valium to talk in front of people and im a talker for sure but nope could not do it. i admire you very much.

J, self care is so important and glad you have that routine happening.

G, how many more sleeps to go? im so excited for you. So excited for the three of us catching up to and actually being organised! Now i hope my menopause mind remembers!

Lav, its getting warmer here so the cold is a coming! i think we will be having a hot summer.

My daughter comes home from her holiday on Saturday and cant wait to see her and my present, my other daughter is visiting tomorrow night. I told them we may as well all move back in together. Funny how they could not wait to spread their wings and now they are happy to be around me. Im very lucky.

take care xx

[Pavati]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi, all:

Quick check in with not much to report.

FWIW, I would much rather speak in front of a large group than a dozen or two. Somehow it feels more anonymous, and you can always get at least ONE person to laugh in a large group...

I started this week trying to be healthier. Instead of staying late to work last night I went to yoga. I have a giant and unruly pile waiting for me this morning, but I feel better in body and mind.

Happy SOBER Thursday!
Pav

[Nursie]

Re: Newbies Nest

I’m back. Will post more later, but pulling up a stick in the best for now. Missed you guys.

[NoSugar]

Re: Newbies Nest

I’m back. Will post more later, but pulling up a stick in the best for now. Missed you guys.

Welcome back, Nursie. You did it before and you can do it again :hug:. NS

[KENSHO]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi Nursie! There's always a spot for you in the Nest!

Byrdie, hope you're hanging in there. Evacuation must be so disruptive. Good thoughts your way!

G - Tuesday Amigo?! How will we say that in Spanish... I think..."Felicitaciones for un ano espectacular!"

Not much to say on my end... just focusing on a fun project and trying to manage the chaos of life! Have a great day everyone!

[Byrdlady]

Re: Newbies Nest

We decided not to evacuate and are riding it out. Jim Cantore just showed up at the end of our street so that’s not good! So far, the highest gust has been 42 mph. I think they are predicting the worst of the storm tonight at 11. We woke up this morning to a tornado warning and there have been several since. Hoping that thing takes a right turn soon!
Thank you for all the thoughts and prayers, I appreciate them so much. Hugs to all. Don’t drink no matter what and no matter who! Byrdie

[jvo]

Re: Newbies Nest

Evening,
So...I’m not great. Didn’t drink, but am struggling. First of all, sleep is not my friend anymore. It has deserted me. I called my doctor about some not so new issues going on that are disrupting my sleep. Still waiting to hear back from her. So I was really tired today. Then...my principal made another new rule today. Another attempt at controlling everything in our small world. Why???????? And my bigger “why” is why the hell do I let it get to me? Yes, she’s going to try and control just about everything and she’s doing it little by little. So why, if I know it’s going to happen, do I let it get under my skin? OMG. My neighbor is out back talking to my husband about her husband who is leaving her again. Sorry for that side thing. I just can’t take her talking about her life that’s falling apart, although I do feel bad. But back to work, I was so angry and tired. Two of HALT’s letters. That’s 50 percent that will lead to drinking. Yes, I recognized it, and I still got pissed, even more. Not pissed drunk. Angry pissed. I decided to forego my nice little freaking routine after work. I came home, and although I knew I could not nap because of my sleep issues and rls, I laid down on the couch and closed my eyes. I woke up angry. I woke up hungry. Now i have three. HAT. I called a friend to talk about work but she wasn’t available. I don’t really have many people to talk to. I do feel sad about that. I wish I had a colleague I could trust, but can anyone trust a colleague really? So I did get that lonely feeling. I needed to talk about work. I needed to know that i wasn’t alone in my anger. I don’t know, but I think I know. They are angry as hell also. They talk at lunch, and I isolated myself from lunch people and lunch room about 27 years ago when I couldn’t eat lunch with others because of my social anxiety. It was ugly, embarrassing stuff, and I still get that pang of anxiety just being in the lunchroom. Situational anxiety. So I got HALT. I win wheel of fortune. Yay for me. After I ate, I decided to read some alkie stories online. that did help somewhat. I smoked a few cancer sticks. I had two cookies. I felt a bit better. I guess it’s true about the sugar giving your brain the same reward that al does, because it seemed to help me. Probably not a great thing to realize. But I will eat sugar as long as I have to until I don’t need sugar anymore as a little al distraction. It was a real struggle for me again. Damn. Before I started back to work, it wasn’t a struggle. But I also slept as long as I needed to, even if it was broken up sleep, i didn’t get angry at anyone mostly. It’s the stress of a job that I don’t want anymore. I wish I cared. Maybe I do care and maybe it’s more about my anger towards my boss and higher ups. I’m constantly worried when they’re going to make their grand freaking entrance with their check sheet, see if I’m doing everything on the checklist (I have not read it after the first day and I refuse to memorize BS) ask my students what they’re learning (they forget that kids forget when they’re nervous, too, when a person they don’t know asks them what they’re learning they go blank, and it’ll be my fault that I’m not teaching them). Yep, been training the kids to look at the board and if anyone strange comes in, or in our case they travel in groups (five administrators at a time) read the learning intentions on the board! We don’t call them objectives anymore, since last year. I still have not done my night routine, and I’m gonna skip teeth flossing and moisturizing. Screw that tonight. Thanks for letting me rant. I was really HALT. Had the f-its. I don’t like that. It seems like I have it worse than anyone, but I know deep down that’s a bunch of crap. I had the F-its really bad after work, but the laying down worked, the smokes worked (did I forget to mention that one?) and the cookies most of all. I’m glad it’s almost time for bed. I’m still a bit mad.

Good night.

Ps the good thing is that husband knows not to bother me when I’m like this.

[jvo]

Re: Newbies Nest

37 days