Newbies Nest

[KENSHO]

Re: Newbies Nest

Quick check in... wish I had time to read back. I have to complete my billing and my whole family is home... which means they think I'm here to talk with them every 5 minutes. I need a sound-proof LOCKED office door. Makes me furious!!

Anyhoo--- welcome to the year of the rat! Hope everyone has a lovely celebration. No need to add booze to it - clear headed is a wonderful way to enter a new year! Keep pushing for the good life... we all deserve it!

[available]

Re: Newbies Nest

Morning nesters

Happy New Year. Woken up sober and ready to take on 2020. The fireworks were neverending last night. Didnt make for a good nights sleep but i can always nap.

Good to see you check in LC and that life is going well. I still havent returned to reading books since my drinking days. I was more into the doco's and movies of alcoholism. To me, i was not into the sciences of why i am an alcoholic, it runs in my family sadly but i am hoping to break that cycle.

Nursie, that is funny that someone stole your wine, someone was looking down at you! I didnt end up drinking the non al wine my mum bought me, i just think why bother.

Pauly, my sleep is like that too but i do love a good nap each day.

Nothing really to report here for the start of 2020, very sad watching the news with all of the fires. My cousin had to cancel our visit as the fires are close to her house.

take care and stay safe xx

[Byrdlady]

Re: Newbies Nest

Happy New Year, Ava! I'm so sorry your visit got cancelled and I hope your cousin's home (and everyone else's) will be spared. Those fires are scary business. My neighbor is in Sydney and what a spectacular display of fireworks she shared on FB. I hope and pray they didn't cause further problems with the fires.

I hope everyone has a safe and sober New Year! A lot of things can be preserved in AL, dignity isn't one of them! Stay the course! Byrdie

[Guitarista]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hola my friends. Happy new year!

The new year ain't no ticket or excuse to no finger lickin, cotton pickin' boozeville K? K. Find what you love and do it regularly. This will help maintain sanity in a chaotic world. There is no reason anyone here cannot partake in ALL of the many treasures and gems this world and universe has on offer. It is ours for the taking. Just be a kind person and ditch the booze. Cultivate your inner mind peace. Gratitude list everyday, one thing. Breathe 5 times or set a timer on phone for 1 minute, 3, 5, 10 minutes. Whatever. No rules. Do this everymorning to create a daily anchor within. Try for 40 days, every day and see what happens. Your mind will change slowly. you're the boss, not your thoughts. You savvy pilgrim? Listen to me giving advice! What do i know? Less and less everyday. Those that dish out advice often need it most themselves........Hey, wait a minute. I do this stuff too. I can only speak from my experience. Try for 40 days. Disclaimer - results may vary.

Take care out there and go for it. Take back your precious life.

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good evening Nesters!
New Year’s eve it is! Saying good bye to 2019! I’ve already decided we are all going to have a fabulous 2020 so no worries

LC, good to see you are doing well.

I’m siting here munching on leftover Christmas cookies with a hot cup of decaf - my idea of a safe & happy celebration
Wishing everyone a safe & peaceful night in the nest. See you in 2020

Lav

[paulywogg]

Re: Newbies Nest

LC, I love the Rational Recovery books, hope it helps you retrain your thinking Happy New year to all of you, only 4 pm here and I'm already NYE out! Long day at work and I'm beat, so I'll see you all in 2020!

[narilly]

Re: Newbies Nest

Happy New Years everyone!!

I am going to party hard from 7pm to 10pm, oh yeah baby!

A couple of friends are coming over and bringing wine. I used to drink with them all the time but no more. I will stuff myself with cheese, sausage and chocolate but no AL for me. Thank goodness. I don’t have to spend all day planning on how I was going to moderate, it would go like this: “ Hmmmm, I will make sure I eat before I drink and when I drink, I will drink very slow. Only one drink before 10 and then 1 before Midnight, maybe a glass of champagne at midnight and then....” WTF! That was brutal and rarely worked.
I am so glad I am not doing that.

Have a good sober night and Don’t drink today. You can do it.

[Nursie]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi Nesters!
Narilly, I feel that so hard! There is nothing worse than trying to plan out your drinking evening in moderation- I remember thinking “I will only have 2”, and as soon as I had half a glass I would change it to “yeah that’s not gonna work, I’ll only have 3” and then never being able to follow through because let’s face it, I wanted to get drunk. Why the hell else would I be drinking? Am I trying to “moderate” my alcohol that gets me drunk to a smaller amount so that I don’t get drunk? No wonder it never worked.

Well NYE is here, and here I am in bed! Don’t think I will keep my eyes open until midnight! But I do know one thing, I will wake up tomorrow with Zero regret. Because alcohol is bullsh*%!! (Heard that on a podcast today!)

Happy 2020! Sprinkling sober dust for all!!

[wagmor]

Re: Newbies Nest

New Year's Eve and Day and the nest is hopping with sober folks! Such great energy here, really happy and healing.

I received a sad news phone call today that my dear aunt passed on. It was very sudden, very unexpected. I'm sad for myself and my loss of my aunt, also for memories of my mom (this was her younger sister) who I miss deeply - especially around the holidays. But even more so I'm sad for my cousins to lose their mom and for my aunt herself to have life end so abruptly.

Ready so say goodbye to 2019 and embrace the good that 202 certainly must bring. Peace and love to all of you here in the nest.

[paulywogg]

Re: Newbies Nest

Happy 2020 nesters, Wags so sorry for your loss shitty way to bring in a new year, Narilly, cheese sausage and chocolate sounds like heaven to me glad you had a nice night, I like alcohol is pure bullshit! Yep I remember the bargaining, I'll drink early then sleep it off, I'll only buy a few, I'll take it slow, I'll put ice cubes in my beer to water it down, I'll exercise while I'm drinking to process it faster, I'll drink lots of water, oh jeez the list goes on and on! Stupid, stupid and so pointless for so long give me a break! So glad to not be hungover today, I'll take that any day over the puking, shits, sweats, shakes, headaches and that vague "empty" feeling and drinking again just to feel half way normal-screw that! I hope we all have a peaceful year, a healthy year- mentally and physically, much love and wishes for a wonderful AF day

[lifechange]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi Nesters,
Happy Unhung New Year's day.. it sounds like everyone had a good, strong plan in place (go to bed early!:happy2 for NYE. And how nice to begin the new decade on the right foot.
We spent much of the day working on a 1000 piece puzzle my mom sent and had indian food for lunch.
This morning I had a lot of discussion going on in my head, feelings of discomfort, a dialogue that sounded like, "what are you trying to do, LC? you've been quitting for 8 years and you're never going to stay quit.. look how much life you've already missed out on... you're so far behind on all of your goals and plans.. you're not interesting at all... you're already 50 years old, why bother? you'll never make it for the rest of your life.. etc, etc".. It hit me hard, but I realized quickly that it was this other voice I have in my head, Not ME. That's the voice that often puts me down, trying to get me to pick up a drink. I have to say it feels good to know that I have the control as to whether or not I listen or act, and to know that I can't be forced to put a glass or bottle to my mouth. I have to sit through some discomfort but I'm getting pretty good at that.
At the indian restaurant, after the meal, the waiter brought us 3 little glasses of mango juice with the bill. My daughter took a sip and almost spit it out, saying yuck! She said it tasted like alcohol and when I asked the waiter, he said it's a mango liquor, it's delicious, try it. I said, no, I don't drink and my daughter is only 15.. Idiot.

Wags, I'm very sad to hear of the loss of your Aunt, especially right now, this time of the year when you're already so sad and missing your mom. Strength and love to you. My thougnts are with you.:hug:
Hope you all have a peaceful day. xx

[KENSHO]

Re: Newbies Nest

I feel terribly hungover this morning. Sugar has a similar affect on me as alcohol did. Time to clean up the diet. Tired of feeling terrible! Glad to be entering 2020 as a proud sober person.

You're an animal Narily! 10:00!!

Nursie, that moderation game was awful!!!!! You describe it well. Yuck!

Wagmore, sorry to hear about your aunt. Were you close to her?

LC, its never too late to find your AF life. I'm sorry about your inner chatter - it has a way of making us feel terrible. You have a lot of life to live - make it your best life! Can you put your finger on what has been getting in the way of your forever quit? I had to wrestle with feeling like I deserved my "best life". I do have to share my admiration for you and anyone who can tackle a 1000 piece puzzle. I don't have the patience, and admire those who do

I've said it before, but it really helped me to create a vision board. I cut out pictures and words that inspired the kind of life I want to live. Having the guts to put on paper the vision of the life I WANT helped me believe that I could actually HAVE it. And for the most part, I am doing it!

Happy Happy New Year Nesters! Love to you all!

[narilly]

Re: Newbies Nest

Happy Un Hung 2020!! So grateful to start another year sober. Let’s kick butt this year everyone!

We had a nice night last night, it was easy for me to stay sober since it is off the table. (Pav)

Life, that pisses me off about the waiter bringing ‘mango juice’ thank goodness you didn’t drink it. Hey, you have a whole lot of life left to live, don’t second guess that.
Yeah, too much sugar Ken, me too. I have to cut that out this year.

Wags, sorry about your aunt. Xo

Nursie, Pauly, yeah we all tried to moderate. Those days are over. Pauly, your description of the hangover is excellent.

Ava, I have been watching the fires on the news. It is brutal. Glad you had a nice night even with those loud fireworks. Xo

Don’t drink today on January 1st. That is no way to start the year.

[julia1970]

Re: Newbies Nest

Happy new year to all of you.

I’m going to stop drinking and smoking as of tomorrow.
I’m not saying I’m going to try, although it’s a bit scary to not hold a reservation (is this proper English?). Skepticism is nonsense (why wouldn’t I succeed?!), and just an excuse for not going in for a 100%. I’m just going to do it and see what I’ll encounter. Failure can be part of the process, but I just have to keep my eye on the ball.
I’ve made a complete program for tomorrow , including going to the gym for the first time in a month and to the movies at night.
I’ve talked it over with my love, and he is going to support me. He’ll try not to drink with me around and he’s going to be in on the process.
One thing that might makes it even more important for me to have firm strategies is that I’m tapering down on antidepressants at the same time. I actually feel better and more alive tapering down (I started taking the meds for a sleeping disorder, I’ll get back on this later) but the detox can make me quite agitated in the weeks following a decrease in dose, and more prone to escape. I decreased the dose today again (I’m half way now). I was in doubt if I should do that right now, but in the end antidepressants make me more susceptible to taking alcohol and drugs, so I think I should procedure with this as well, in a careful manner that is.

Julia - welcome, glad you found the nest. How can we best help support you with your quit?

I’m very sorry about your loss Wagmor…

And thanks for asking this, that’s touching!

Reading about your successes in staying sober helps greatly. It’s opened up a new perspective. Complete sobriety doesn’t seem that high of a mountain anymore, but instead a realistic option.
The experience of not being the only one having (had) this struggle gives me a spacious feeling of possibility.
I’m going to post here every day to help me stay focused. I would appreciate it if you read me in a critical way, hold me accountable, let me know if you think I’m making excuses, or creating escapes.
And hurray me whenever I’m succeeding
If you feel like it of course.

[available]

Re: Newbies Nest

Morning nesters

Watching the news is just so sad atm, so many homes lost, people missing, people dead, it just makes you realise how percious life is. My cousin says where she lives has the worst air quality in the world atm and no sight of rain. We have more hot weather coming so they are trying to evacuate holiday makers out of areas.

Wags, im sorry to hear about your aunt, its hard when its so sudden, sending you hugs.

Julia good luck with your plan. dont put too many expectations on yourself, take it day by day and minute by minute. i found if i did three things a day for the first few months that was enough, we are going through a lot of change when we get sober.

LC, i think we all felt the same as you when we stopped drinking. I never ever ever thought i could live my life without al in it, i had those doubts that i would fail and why bother, half my life was over anyways, id achieve nothing, but i look at what i have achieved sober and drinking was the main reason why i never achieved anything. I never had the motivation, i always felt guilt, shame and remorse, i didnt love myself and i could not be bothered. Al was my life and it took my life away. I think for two years when it was my sober anniversary i would look behind me thinking it was someone else doing this, it could not possibly be me but now sober is who i am, my alcoholism is always a part of my makeup but its not who i am now unless i take that first drink and then it will all turn to shit. I am the only one that has control over my life.

Pauly and Nar, the bargaining we used to do, what a head f*ck that was. I would be shattered either way, i remember i would get anyone to get my wines and my son would tell me i would fall over if i didnt get up and yep he was right! So many face plants into anything really. I dont miss the bruises that used to pop up daily with no memory of where they came from.

Today involves me washing my car, the excitement of holidays. Not remembering what day it is and just lazing the days away.

Take care xx