Newbies Nest

[lifechange]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good Morning, Nesters!

it sounds like everyone is doing well in their quits..
Julia, great list on activating the PSN. I know that all of those things mentioned add to my well being when I do them! Great job on working through those cravings.. I personally don't think you could post "too much" here.. that's what this forum is for. As Byrdie mentioned, Lunatic Linda (as Ava called herself :love posted OFTEN!, felt like she was waffling but knew it's what she had to do.. and here she is with 6 years of sobriety. Post away!!!

Wags, I'm very sorry to hear of the loss of your friend. Gosh, you've had a lot of loss this past month. You really need a break.:hug: I'm glad you've got your immediate family for support.. and your sobriety strong in place. Love to you..

I made the decision yesterday (especially after thinking about G's post) that I won't be on the computer (except for here and briefly checking emails) during daylight hours! One reason I can be happy about it getting dark early!:happy2: In all seriousness, it did me good! I went to the gym, read a ton, had a couple hours at work.. knowing that I "couldn't" use the computer freed my mind for other things. It will be more challenging when I'm back at work because I tend to veg out in front of netflix when I'm exhausted. But I'm going to try.

I'm like you, Pauly, a pusher and a player. Depends. I think I typically try to be a player, skipping over the first nice hour or so to the consequences.
I've been focussing lately on other things that get me to the level of relaxation I felt when I anticipated drinking and then how I felt for the first couple of drinks. There are plenty of things out there once we get our minds in the right place.. things that don't f*** up our lives and the lives of those who love us.

I have to say, I am so deeply saddened by the fires in Australia.. I really hope that they will able to be brought under control.
As Wags said, Hug your loved ones.. Love to all of you.xx

[STEADFAST]

Re: Newbies Nest

Greetings Nesters,

Belatedly signing on to wish everyone a very Happy New Year 2020 :love:

I don't get on-line so much lately, but never stop thinking about sobriety and the amazing and lovely folk here.

There's lots going on, as I'm sure there is for everyone here. But so long as we stay true to our quits, we can handle it, right?!

Have a nice weekend,
Steady

[julia1970]

Re: Newbies Nest

DAY 3 OF SOBRIETY!!!!! That even rhymes.

I feel so happy people! I feel less jittery today, and less foggy. Maybe i can get some studying done today. Yesterday i was seeing the words one by one, but couldn't actually read them, which can be nice - they were quite nice words and all (i'm studying a branch of philosophy) - but in the end i was asking myself am i stoned or something? Very weird.

Stepping out onto the streets this morning and bumping into my neighbors, it was so nice to not feel ashamed for a change. Normally (especially on a Saturday) I mostly look like a train wreck, heading for the next crash.

Julia, great work on day 1. I found by the 3rd day my brain was telling me if i had done 3 days i was cured and could moderate. I had to remember not to listen to myself and to log on here and listen to others.

I’m hoping I’ve learned from previous experiences… 8 years ago I finally managed to go AF after a terrible struggle of half a year, drinking heavily (i’m actually shocked when I read my notes from back then to see how much I was drinking, what a nightmare) while increasing my baclofen dose up to 230 mg. And then throwing it away by getting stubborn and grandiose again thinking I could manage tapering down and moderating my drinking. And this wasn’t the first time.
But I’m sure I will get those stupid grandiose thoughts again, thinking for me it’s different than for other addicts. I admire the resolve of you people to keep posting here, even after years of sobriety. A very good example for me.
I guess (honest) connection is one of the main ingredients of lasting sobriety. I was so lonely back then.

The fires in Australia make me so sad and feel utterly powerless. Apocalyptic. I cannot even imagine what it must be like to be living with that reality so nearby...

[paulywogg]

Re: Newbies Nest

Morning nesters, yep Julia the fires are overwhelming! Seen a cute little singed koala they saved and his name is Paul which made me feel connected to him haha hope they get it under control quickly! Congrats on day 3,Wags, I'm so so sorry about your friend, that's too damn young and unfair, I really hope things settle down, two losses so far is draining jeez still a zombie this morning more coffee needed, sending vibes for a fab day for all!

[Pavati]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi, all:

Julia - this resonated with me.

But I’m sure I will get those stupid grandiose thoughts again, thinking for me it’s different than for other addicts. I

I have found that we addicts like to find out how we're different - how our particular situation/drama/stressor is different and therefore how our response to it might be different. We resist the advice of those who have come before. That was how I was finally successful - I humbled myself and did exactly what long-time successful sober people told me to do. Lav says be grateful - what?? That sounded hokey, but darn if it doesn't work. Post here, have a plan, push or play thoughts... All of it. At first I thought "that will NEVER be me - content and sober," and then I realized those two things go hand-in-hand. Lav, Byrdie and NoSugar were my nest-mom guides and I just did what they said. Seems to have worked.

Wags, I am so sorry for your loss. That is very sad - so young. What his mom must be feeling... Take care of yourself.

Well, I went to a wedding last night and we ended up dancing for the last three hours or so. My feet are SORE as I was wearing new shoes. By the end there were two women who were quite intoxicated. One of them kept wanting to talk about how we never see each other any more (and close talking about how much she loves me - BORING), and the other was just sort of being mean to her husband as she danced around the room. We gave the later a ride home (love being the DD), and it was quite a sight seeing her get out of the car and up to her house. I was SO THANKFUL that wasn't me! I am glad I am not them waking up this morning with the GSR brothers, wondering what went on. Overall it was a really fun night.

Happy SOBER Saturday!

xo
Pav

[available]

Re: Newbies Nest

morning nesters

sitting here with a cuppa reading all of the great posts and its kind of raining, woo hoo. Today the firefighters will try and get the fires under control as conditions are pretty good. The response to donations etc from all over the world has been amazing. Its cooler across the States today so that is a good thing for today. I just saw an add released by the government on how much they are doing. Bit sad they have to advertise it when all that is being done now should have been done months ago.

Julia, oh yes i thought i was different too, when i first joined here i was sure the long termers had it easy in their sobriety and they didnt really understand what I was going through but as Pav said when i truly listened to them and understood how they got sober i took that on board. For me sobriety was one of the hardest things i had to go through but the most worthwhile accomplisment of my life. Even having 4 children was easier ha ha. Today i wish i had done it sooner but the life i have now can only be taken away by myself if i drink. Great work on day 3 and be a lunatic linda and post away. I felt it helped me immensely to get my thoughts out to work through my cravings.

Wags, i am sorry for another loss for you this year. Sending you hugs to you and your family.

Pav, i had a chuckle about the drunk women, oh that was so me (minus the partner and i was never abusive) but i so wanted to tell people i loved them and missed them. Grateful we are not in that position any more.

Back to work tomorrow, i am looking forward to it and then again i am not. It will be nice to catch up with everyone. My registrars leave in a few weeks which will be sad, its amazing to see how much they grow and come out of themselves in a year of working with neurology. Some are staying, some are moving away. I do find that a lot return when they are fully qualified which is lovely.

Going to motivate to go for a walk, it will be nice to wear a jacket and enjoy the rain.

take care xx

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good evening Nesters,

Thank the Universe for the rain Ava! I hope it helps the fire & drought situation quickly.
Ease back into work, one day at a time

Pav, drunk at a wedding ~ yeah I think I’ve done that too in the past but never again, right?

Pauly, hope your day was good!

Julia, great job on your 3 days AF, yay!!! You will continue to feel better each & every day!

Steady, great to see you & Happy New Year to you!

LC, that’s the greta thing about being AF. We can arrange our day any way we like without worrying about our next fix, right?

Wags, I am very sorry about your friend, how sad!
My uncle literally dropped dead at the age of 48, thought it would kill my grandmother, so sudden. Take care of your & your loved ones :hug:

We had our younger grandson here for a few hours, took him out for a bite to eat then returned him to his parents, haha. He’ll be turning 9 in April & has shown great improvement over the past 6 months or so but can still be a handful, if you know what I mean, Lol
Wishing everyone a safe & comfy night in the nest!

Lav

[narilly]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good evening everyone.
Thank goodness for the rain Ava, hopefully it helps. My heart goes out to all of you Down Under. We are sending firemen from Alberta to help, I think many nations are helping. I can’t imagine being there, it is hard to watch.
Pav, the drunk friends, ugh, I have been both of those in one night! So glad we are not on that roller coaster. It’s embarrassing to think about what an ass I was.

Way to go Julia, 3 days is excellent. Every sober day is a gift. keep it up!

So sorry about your friend Wags. That really sucks, hopefully this is the last of the bad stuff for awhile. Sometimes death seems so random, I feel bad for that poor family.

Lav, you sure enjoy being a grandma. That is so nice. I hope to be a Grandma one day

Life, I think it makes a big difference staying away from technology for a time. I am sure you will like that. I notice I don’t sleep as well if I watch videos on my iPad before bed so I quit doing that.

Hello G! Hope the smoke is going down.

Have a goodnight xo.

[wagmor]

Re: Newbies Nest

Thanks for all the thoughts and support everyone - I really appreciate each and every comment.


Ava - thank goodness for a bit of rain, and with better conditions I hope the firefighters manage to get a handle on the fires today. It's all so sad and horrible. Hope your return to work is easy.

Pav - yep, we've probably all been one of the two wedding women at one time or another, even if not in their entirety. Never. Again.

Julia - great job on Day 3 and especially on realizing that in most ways we are not terribly different from one another - not in the big ways that the al voice tries to convince us of anyway. People who have successful quits don't have them because they didn't have challenges along the way, they/we have them in spite of those challenges. When you take al off the table, life still happens and we cope in different ways. Sounds like you've got some prior success to reflect back on and I wish you continued progress as we move to Day 4 and onward.


Ok, I have to go get ready for a full day of teaching. Just one more pretty full week and then a test day which for me means a "recovery week" of sorts. We're gonna escape to a mountain cabin for 3 nights and hopefully go snowshoeing or at least hiking. Can't wait, but have to get through several full days before then. Happy Sundays-into-Mondays everyone!

[paulywogg]

Re: Newbies Nest

Morning nesters, Ava, a relief to hear of rain, dunno how much it can help but hopefully some Lav, glad to hear grandson seems to be improving, all we want Is the best for them that's sor sure, Pav, ugh the annoying drinks, I know I was one of the biggest, in your face asshole drunks there were I LOVED everybody! Then sober up and realized I hugged one of my work enemies, ugh don't miss that! Waves to all and wishes for a happy and healthy AF day

[Pavati]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi, All:

SO glad for the rain, Ava - is it all over the south? Fingers crossed they get some of those fires under control.

Lav - that is so great that you have such close relationships with your grandchildren. You are lucky to have each other.

Nar - Hoping for a job for the New Year for you.

Yes, I was the wedding guest who loved everyone and danced a tad more sloppily... As Byrdie says, those WEREN'T the good old days.

I stepped on the scale this morning - the damage is bad, but I can rebuild. Now to just moderate my food intake - hard for me for sure. I'm up for the challenge...

Happy SOBER Sunday,
Pav

[lifechange]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good Sunday, Nesters,

Ava, thank goodness for the rain. I hope it will carry on for a few days, at least, to give you all some relief. I'm also headed back to work tomorrow with mixed feelings. I'm so grateful for my job, but....
Pav, I'm in the challenge with you. I've got some mild goals, mostly being able to keep up with my youngest daughter this summer, as we'll be travelling for a month, just the two of us. Which reminds me that I've been meaning to ask where in CA you live? Approximately? Here's to some better choices with regards to nutrition and portion size!
Wags, all the best to you this next week.. a 3 day holiday to a cabin with snow shoeing/hiking sounds like a wonderful reward for your efforts!
Julia, how are you doing today?
Nursie, how's it going with the project you were working on? Do check in and let us know how you are..:love:
Lav, I have to say, I miss 9. Now that my youngest is 15.. I'm one of those saying, gosh they grow up so fast. When they were younger it seemed like walking through deep mud at times. Hindsight!
Byrdie, when will you hear about the deal you were working on/waiting to hear about? Still have my fingers and toes crossed!

Today was a lovely day here.. I ended up cancelling the hiking club walk to go for a long outing/walk with a good friend of mine. I think I still need some time to build up to meeting with a bunch of people I don't know. I'm signed up for a meditation group next weekend which feels "safer" since we sit in silence with our eyes closed!:happy2:
Not so much to say today..

I hope everyone is doing well and feeling strong in their sobriety. If you're feeling wobbly, STOP HERE and let us know..
Hugs to Nar, Pauly, NS, Gman, Kensho, Belle, 3B'S, and to everyone flying by or stopping in today.xx

[narilly]

Re: Newbies Nest

Happy Un Hung Sun everyone!

My mom has had a virus for the past week and is finally looking better today. I have been going over to her house and helping her out- giving her drinks, cooking, cleaning etc. I worry about her, she seems to be aging fast but I guess that is what happens at 85.
I am so glad I can go over and help her and I feel good. Having a hangover and trying to hide it from my mom all the time really sucks.

I have gained a few lbs over the holiday and am going to have to lose it in the next few weeks. We are heading to Mexico at the end of January, yippee! Gotta get that bathing suit body back, haha.

Sounds like everyone is doing well. I really hope there is some resolution to the fires Ava, it is horrific.

Don't drink today, xo.

[julia1970]

Re: Newbies Nest

Day 4 - my god what a day.... but i managed to stay sober.
More tomorrow. I'm so stressed out i think could breath into my anus for three hours and still just have the tip of the tension out of my system

Dublin Girl, i'm wondering how you are doing... Are you still planning on quitting tomorrow? If you do or not, I hope you'll keep posting and reading here for support and to not feel alone with your struggle.

Wagmor, somehow i didn't see your post yesterday. I'm very sorry for what you're going through. I wish i could find some good words now, but can't find any.

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Greetings Nesters,

Well the wind has blown in some very cold air ~ more seasonal I guess. I really don’t mind winter that much if I don’t have to go out & deal with it much, haha!. We did take a stroll thru Costco today for a few necessities & of course some stuff you really don’t need that much, Lol
Funny story - my granddaughter & younger grandson are both 9, born about 6 weeks apart. This week my granddaughter lost a tooth, an upper incisor. Two days later (yesterday) my grandson lost the same exact tooth. It’s freaky how they do things like that!!! I am so grateful to be a part of their lives, they keep me honest

Julia, good job on your 4 days! Not every day is awesome, we all have ‘those’ days from time to time but it’s OK as long as well handle them AF, right?

Narilly, I gained 3 lbs over the holidays which will go away. I haven’t found my bathing suit body that I lost a decade & a half ago, Lol

LC, it seemed like it took forever for my kids to grow up. But watching these grandkids grow up is frighteningly fast!!! Scares me just a little

Pav, slow & steady with the weight loss - be kind to yourself!!

Hello to everyone & wishing a safe night in the nest!

Lav