Newbies Nest

[paulywogg]

Re: Newbies Nest

Morning nesters, Wags glad you got through but dang sounds soooo emotional of a day Byrdie, sorry about the commission, guy sounds like a little shit! Julia, have you seen your doctor? On this last quit I kept hoping to feel better, less tired, less headache-y, less weak but after 6 months when I still felt like hell I finally got diagnosed with anemia, so it may be good to go see what he's got to say? Boring hmmm, my son in law did dry January and got thru the whole month fine except he said it's boring as hell, I told him to wait for the magic to happen and he said "there is no magic, not drinking sux" and went back to drinkin here and there in Feb, what I noticed about him and me is I'm fine just BEING, I'm fine with my own company and can usually find something to occupy my mind/time, he's totally different and I'd always looking for stimulating stuff to do, when we took him to the beach a few years ago for the first time he was bored, while I'm happy just sitting on the sand watching the kids play in the water he just HAD to go ride the rides on the pier and bitch about the sand and all the people around, that's the difference I think, you hafta be happy just being, not drinking might be boringsville sometimes, yet barfing, crying, taking stupid chances while drinking gets pretty boring too! Waves to the gang and wishes for a happy day!

[KENSHO]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good morning. Having coffee in the sun. I don't have much to say at the moment, just that I'm feeling fairly peaceful. There is a lot to be anxious about if I stop and think about it, but I'm choosing not to do that. I have a lot to enjoy and be grateful for. Thank goodness I'm not wasting my time with a hangover right now. UG! It's been a long time since I felt that toxic nausea and I don't miss it one bit.

Enjoy your day Nest.

[walktothewater]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi alll, I'm new here. Time for me to pick a sobriety date.

[narilly]

Re: Newbies Nest

Happy Un Hung Wednesday.

Welcome Walktothewater! Lets make that sobriety date today, what's the hold up? There is no time like the present to quit drinking, believe me, life gets better and better without it.
I drank for 40 years and tried to moderate for about 30 of them. THAT did not work. I found My Way Out and was trying to moderate and finally decided it was all or nothing for me and I really quit. All of us that come here have had the same struggle. You can do it. Keep coming back here and posting. We are all in this together.

Hello to everyone, Ken, Lav, Pav, Ava, Julia(yay 55!), Wags,G, and everyone else.

Have a nice day and don't drink today xo.

Pauly, yeah, barfing and crying and taking stupid chances, thanks for the reminder. I am so grateful my drinking days are behind me.

Byrdie, I want to kick your ex coworker's ass. Glad you are out of there.

[walktothewater]

Re: Newbies Nest

Thanks Narilly. You're right, I should just stop. You mention you drank for 40 years. I've been drinking for 29 years - not all of it alcoholically, but the last 8 definitely have been, at least. So my addict brain is telling me "hey I don't even need to stop yet, I can get under good 10 years out of it." Which is madness I know.

[KENSHO]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi Walktothewater! Welcome! There are people of all drinking durations and quantities here. Some more, some less, some shorter, some longer. But the constant is that not a single one of them wishes they prolonged their madness. Once you quit and work through it, you will never want to go back. Promise! Get yourself a plan (toolbox has GREAT ideas), and pick a date. There's never a "good" time to quit you might say, because there's always life happening. There's always an event or vacation coming up, stress around the corner or relationship issues to deal with. So just pick a date. We will be with you all along the way!! Good for you for wanting to tackle it and have a better life. And it REALLY is better without alcohol. By leaps and bounds.

[walktothewater]

Re: Newbies Nest

Thanks Kensho, will check out that toolbox thread.

[available]

Re: Newbies Nest

Morning nesters

Pauly, i never barfed, i didnt want to waste all that al i had poured down my throat. I do know i never want to go back to the brain fog, the shakes, the nausea, the bleeding gums, the sores that would not heal, the planning and trying to remember which bottlo i had been to the day before. Thank god they are just vague memories now but always a good reminder of why i never want to drink again. My son also says its boring not drinking, well sunshine find something to do, excitement doesnt come to you i tell him.

Julia great work on your days and i hope you start to feel ok soon. i had a shocking headache for 3 months, i was going a brain tumour there for a bit but i think my brain was trying to fix itself. I always tell myself that i drank hard for 8-10 years so if it takes me that long to recover then so be it. We are a work in progress.

Wag, so glad you made it through the family gathering. we are always building those sober muscles. I have a wake to go to in a couple of weeks and i dont really know anyone except the ex and i thought "god i will so need a wine" but i wont, i dont need it to get through the event and i am going to pay my respects to this lovely man.

Byrd, what an arse that company is but be grateful you dont have that stress in your life anymore.

Welcome Walk, Your drinking will only get worse, it never gets better for us alkies. Its scary stopping drinking. what will you do with your time, you will be bored etc but you have to just take it one day at a time. We all tried moderating and all failed dismally until we realised that it has to be all or nothing. i could not imagine my life sober and now i cant imagine my life drinking. Everything gets so much better after a time.

So busy at work and then read an email that is going to mean i am even busier. I dont even think this pay increase is worth the workload but we will see. A tad cold this morning going to work, 4 degrees and its only autumn. Heading into winter which isnt a bad thing, at least i can get warm.

take care xx

[julia1970]

Re: Newbies Nest

hi walktothewater! glad you're joining in.
i'm on day 56 of sobriety after more than 30 years of addiction. two months ago i couldn't imagine getting clean of all substances (most of all alcohol) without the use of meds, but i've found that with the support of this forum it's been quite doable.
it's a matter of perspective i guess. and contact. reading and posting here on a daily basis is an important part of my keeping focus, keeping clear of pitfalls and excuses, making plans to get through difficult moments, believing that i can do this (there are so many great exemples of that here!) and feeling supported. there's so much wisdom and kindness on this forum.

yesterday evening i remembered the constant shame i was always feeling towards other people. i invested a lot of energy in dealing with that (trying to keep up appearance, hiding, avoiding, etc). i am so relieved to not feel ashamed like this anymore... and that is only one of the things i feel liberated from now that i'm sober.

Pauly thanks for your remark about the doctor. i think the thing that makes me so tired is my broken sleep. i seem to have some sort of urinal infection-like-thing (though not a real one) that wakes me up every hour. i've finally bought cranberry capsules (why wait so long to take some action Jules??!!) to see if they'll make a difference. i sure hope so.
tapering down the antidepressants has been giving me huge nightmares and overall intense dreams. it seems like all kinds of old issues are resurfacing since getting cleaner and cleaner of suppressing stuff. so i'm even more in need of good sleep right now to process things.

i hópe tonight will be better.

and i hope you all are well dear people.

[paulywogg]

Re: Newbies Nest

Welcome Walktothewater! No don't try and get 10 more years out of drinking, there's no guarantees with taking that kind of chance, I'm shocked my liver and stuff are normal I got lucky I guess with the way I was drinking it should be swiss cheese take charge now! Julia, I forgot you were tapering anti-D's that's probably alot to do with the lack of sleep and those withdrawal to deal with, I had forgotten I'm sorry, you know I quit Zoloft about 10 years ago and I didn't know I was supposed to taper so I just cut back in two days and was fine surprisingly, those things were such poison for ME that I think my body was relieved to be free of them, who knows, hope your cranberry pills help Ava, I never wanted to throw up but my body always rejected alcohol no matter how little so you figure I'd have learned alot earlier to stop sheesh

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good evening Nesters,

Hello & welcome Walktothewater! Glad you found us & decided to join in
If you look at my signature line I also signed up in February 2009 but didn’t totally quit for another month. Why? I was just scared, scared of the unknown I guess.
It turned out there was absolutely nothing to be scared about. Every day got better & better & it will for you as well. I’m coming up on 11 years March 26 - who knew that was possible?
Stay cllose to the nest & make a good plan for yourself. The Tool box is full of great ideas.

Julia, I’m coming to the conclusion that sleep difficulties are age related. The older we get the harder it is to get decent sleep. I still have hope though, hope you do as well.

Hello to Ava, Kensho, Pauly & everyone!

Have a safe night in the nest everyone!

Lav

[narilly]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hello everyone, just a quick check in before I take my mom to an appointment.

Don't drink today!

[Byrdlady]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hey all. I was browsing through Facebook and an article came up on my feed about the 10 signs of a relapse. While that thought has not entered my mind one single time, I thought I better get my arse over here and participate!
Maybe I’m in the depression part of my grief process, so if that’s the case, I hope the next step is acceptance. My area has a free legal advice thing next Friday, so I thought I’d give them a call to see if I can do anything with this. I just hate to go the legal route, but appealing to their sense of decency didn’t work.

We are finally getting some sun, that helps.
Walktothewater. I tried quitting for 10 years and that last year, and really tried to moderate and control it. An ultimatum by by hubs on January 19, 2011 made me get serious in a hurry. I realized I hadn’t been serious before. I always kept the door open. Maybe someday I could drink normally again. I finally had to let go of that dream and accept the fact that addiction is more than a bad habit. It is wiring in the brain and no amount of willpower was going to change that. The very idea of moderation is flawed. What happens after a couple drinks? Our judgement is impaired, so there goes whatever willpower we had. The best day to start? Right now. Get all the AL out of your space. Set yourself up for success. We are so glad you found us!
Hope everyone has an easy day. Byrdie

[julia1970]

Re: Newbies Nest

take care Byrdie. i'm sending you a very warm hug, i hope it reaches you.

day 57 for me. and off to bed.

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good evening Nesters,

Turned cold again in Lav-land but that’s OK.
Dealing with a family crisis right now. Yesterday morning my daughter-in-law’s parents were hit head on by a reckless driver in FL. Her Mom did not survive, her Dad is in ICU with critical injuries. DIL flew down right away & tonight my son & grandsons are driving to FL. Life lost in the blink of an eye, very sad & tragic.

Hello to all & wishing everyone a very safe night in the nest!

Lav