Newbies Nest

[lifechange]

Re: Newbies Nest

hi Nesters,

Gosh, I really don't know what to say. Like you, Steady, I have a short limit to how much news I take in each day.. I visit our old surrogate grandma across the street each morning for coffee and after 20 minutes of tv (she has it on the whole day) I've had enough.. It's hard not to get overwhelmed by the enormity of it all, so I'm focussing on what I can do here.. which isn't a lot. But I can cook healthy food for the girls, help with homework, get in some exercise for mental health, go shopping for grandma.. I find I'm spending a lot of time on the phone with friends, as talking it out a bit and discussing how we're feeling keeps us connected.

As NS and Lav also mentioned, I'm hoping and praying that this will cause people to self reflect/do some soul searching.. I would love it if we could come together on a global level and find ways to take care of all living creatures and our planet. It doesn't seem like rocket science.. but some people/governments definitely have to change their ways. It's TRAGIC that in such a powerful, wealthy country like the U.S., people have to suffer so much.. that there is no economic strategy to support people in times of crisis.? Let alone in "normal" times.

Wags, I'm really sorry that you're in such a situation.. I knew you had your own business but I also thought you were supported by a University.. I guess you are in a sense when they're up and running. I hope, like you said, that they will be on their toes about finding solutions. I'm glad you're still able to go out a bit to get some fresh air, sun and exercise.. you live in a small town, is that right? I was quite worried about them imposing "house arrest" (can't remember what it's called) on us after France declared it earlier this week.. but it seems people here are complying to the rules. And even in France, you're still allowed to go out to exercise. Good luck with the garage project! Might be fun to discover what's in there!

Byrdie, I had to laugh at the toilet paper rationing.. My dad was so stingy with toilet paper and tight with the rules.. when I was 19 I visited him with my Grandmother (his mom) and after the first day she came to me and said, your dad told me I'm only allowed to use 2 squares per visit!! She was flabergasted and pissed! She said, I'm NOT going to do that.. I'm going to use as much as I like! And she did.. :happy2: We go through so much here with 3 women.. we're going to talk! I watched/binged Manhunter a couple weeks ago. I found it so interesting and welll done.. Here here to no empties!

I've got a sourdough bread dough that needs my attention.. so looking forward to baking it tomorrow.
Lav, what kind of soup did you make? I've been cooking a lot, gathering ideas and recipes for when we're back at work. We're sending out easy recipes with photos for work people to make at home in the evenings.. I wish I knew what else I could do to help someone/some people.. I have quite a bit of energy now that I'm not running around at work.. but no great ideas.? Though I'm meeting with 2 of my colleagues tomorrow so maybe we'll think of something.

Hugs and love and health to all of you.xx

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good evening Nesters,

It was nice out today so we took an hour’s ride to a place that’s own & operated by a veteran for compost. We just pulled in with the truck & trailer, they loaded it up & we handed a check out the window. Supporting small business while keeping ourselves safe!!! This guy makes the best compost for our gardens

LC, I had made a pot of bone broth in the IP Sunday night. Yesterday I sautéed onions, garlic, celery & carrots & tossed all that in along with a lot of shredded chicken 7 fresh herbs. I skipped the noodles & rice & carb heavy stuff, it was good.

Pav, the spelt flour has a nutty whole wheat like flavor. I’ll try anything once & it was pretty good

Ava, think you may have one or more kids moving back in? Single earners are likely to have a very hard time during this crisis, sad.

Wags, being self employed is great until things like this happen. We really don’t know how long all this is going on, do we? I hope it’s not long & things & students can get back to ‘normal’. My daughter told me today that their school district is hinting about the school year being over - they probably won’t bring the little ones back into school.

Hi Steady, good to see you!

Hi to everyone else & wishing a safe night in the nest for all!

Lav

[Byrdlady]

Re: Newbies Nest

Yes, it is a strange time in our lives.
Wags, how times have changed. I stood in a store the other day in front of $6 pack of socks (that I needed!) and absolutely agonized over whether or not to buy them. No question, money is tight. I use Sr discounts and. Coupons whenever possible. Scary times, my retirement may be short lived.
At least my bitterness over that job has been replaced by fear of this virus, so there’s that.
Wishing everyone strength in the battles we are waging. We WILL win. Butt bumps to all, Byrdie

[Pavati]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi, All:

Wags, I'm sorry for that situation. I have a friend who plans events and that has obviously dried up. We were helping her come up with ideas to sell like online party ideas. Hard to see how that can be a money maker, though. I do think the BIG testing industry has a lot to gain by finding a solution - i hope it works out for you. My 80 year old mom lives upstairs - she always has a cough anyway, as she does now, and she is VERY lonely, but she is doing a good job at keeping isolated. My job is pretty secure for now. We'll see how that plays out.

I'll be back tomorrow...

Pav

[Guitarista]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hola nesters!

Hiya Steady. :checkin:

Hey LC! :yay:

Hope all are going ok. For me a bigger issue than the virus is our collective mental health around the world. The panic, anxiety, stress and worry is a lot to bear for many. Most people seem to recover with rest.

As we're seeing, many in hospitality and entertainment which includes millions of casual workers with no sick pay or job security are affected. Govt's here have said they'll offer financial support to these workers, but we'll see.

Big waves to evabody. All's ok here. Take it easy.

[lifechange]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi Nesters,
How's everyone doing today?

Ava, xpost yesterday! I'm glad to hear your mom is listening to you and staying inside.. my mom's doing the same, which I was also relieved to hear. How's little Carl? Are you making it out with him for short walks? Wondering which veggies grow best in your garden? I'm kicking myself for not having got some soil and seeds before all the shops closed..

Pav, are you working from home now? Is your mom isolating from all of you, too, or just from going outside? Is she someone who's usually quite active?

Lav, your soup sounds so good.. that will be my next purchase when I head out to the shops again..

Hi Gman, Hi Byrdie.:hug:

I just baked the sourdough bread and made some granola.. I have an awesome recipe from my mom, if anyone is interested.. I had everything in the pantry, which was cool. Not GF, though.. oats.
Otherwise, we're all in sorting and cleaning mode. I took everything out of the fridge and cleaned it.. found some interesting things in there!:happy2:
Here's a nice little about decluttering..5 Ways Decluttering Has Positively Impacted My Recovery | The Temper

Hugs and strength to everyone flying or stopping by today.xx

[Pavati]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi, All:

Yes, LC, I'd love the granola recipe. My mom is quite active and social. She walks her dogs every day and has several bridge/mah jong/canasta games that she goes to. I offered to help her figure out how to play those online but she wasn't having any of it. She is bored and wants to see her friends. I also offered to help her have a zoom meeting with them but she declined as well. I'm going to show her how it works (from a distance) with us, and maybe she'll come around. I hope your business isn't too hard hit.

Yes, G, that collective anxiety is also contagious. I do think I need a day to just loll about and rest - sleep, watch TV, etc. Saturday... I hope our government steps up, too. Right now they're talking payroll tax reduction which doesn't really work for those who don't have jobs at all.

Pauly, I've been thinking about you, too. I imagine your shop closed. Is there anything you can do? I was thinking that people will still need haircuts. Maybe you could set up a chair outside in your neighborhood and people could come to you there? Maybe with a mask on? Hard to conceive how hairy and grey we'll all be by the end of this.

I did some deep breathing exercises last night, and I have my walking shoes. I am going to work but I am going to be the only one there, so I will be socially distant. I will wipe it all down and then get to work.

Hope you are all taken care of. If you need anything, PM me. We can help find you support. Most of all, don't use this as an excuse to fall off the wagon and take a drink. It would be "easy" to do so, but would make this all so much harder. We're here for you!

Pav

[wagmor]

Re: Newbies Nest

Thanks for the positive vibes everyone. Yesterday was an incredibly hard day. I lost one of my precious few current students, although in honesty, she was a good one to lose - it's a blessing in disguise but still hit me hard. On a positive work note, one of my other students decided to pre-pay for ten hours of tutoring, which is enough to keep me afloat for a couple of weeks, and I also got one new student inquiry and will be video chatting with that fellow today.

Unfortunately, my dad and I had a big blow up yesterday. He went out to do a quick easy errand (pay for his storage unit, which he always does in person) and I cringed but thought maybe it wouldn't be too much exposure. But then he came walking in with a shopping bag - he had just stopped off to get some things at a big store. I didn't react well to say the least, but I'm exhausted from trying to minimize risk for him and for my wife, and it just felt like he had nonchalantly thrown all of the effort in the garbage. I tried to go talk with him later but he said no, so I wrote him an email. Through a short message exchange he said he had felt disrespected ever since he moved in with us almost three years ago. My wife and I are both crushed, as that is the last thing we ever wanted to do. My dad isn't a great communicator and he did own that he might be majorly responsible for the failure to communicate, but it still hit hard to find out he's quietly been resenting things for almost 3 years.

I'm exhausted and really need a break. If I were drinking I would have already started this morning and it's not even 8am here. Thank god al isn't easy to get. I really don't want to drink but not having any in the house makes that far easier. Well, there is my wife's beer in the house but that turns my stomach so we're pretty safe there.

Sigh...

LC - We actually live in a fairly large city, which is a double edged sword at times like these. And although I'm tutoring students who are headed to graduate school at numerous universities, I'm not officially affiliated with any particular one. I agree with you on the hope that as a planet of people we rethink our priorities and behaviors for the better. It's interesting to see how the environment (air quality, animals) are already responding to just a few months with less travel.

Byrdie - yep, $6 socks take on a different meaning now don't they? Are you on unemployment? Maybe at least you'll benefit if they extend or broaden those benefits?


Hellos and waves to everybody. I'm off to start my day and brace myself for the eventual talk with my dad. I hate conflict of any kind so I'm really dreading this conversation.

[paulywogg]

Re: Newbies Nest

Morning nesters, well Vegas is basically shut down, so hard to even imagine, all of this feels like a dream that I can't wake up from, yesterday was my last day at work cuz the governor called for a shutdown of all "non essential" business, I'm devastated just cuz keeping busy and having my routine is my lifeline and I didn't know how much I took it for granted! Stupidly too I'm a spender, should have been socking money away but I was using alot of my pay to get credit cards paid off now I won't even be able to cover the minimum so there goes that too I drank, I felt so foggy and anxious and that first beer made it all melt away for a bit, now today I feel even shittier, I just didn't know how to cope you guys, this is SO big and scary that I just feel lost, Tomorrow is Kellie's birthday and poor thing had ordered a dress off Amazon and it came yesterday, she was so sad cuz there's no where to wear it, I feel so selfish! Instead of holding it together I wasted 8 months of sober time, happy sober time I'm just scared guys.

[NoSugar]

Re: Newbies Nest

Oh [MENTION=17650]paulywogg[/MENTION]. I'm sorry you are feeling so bad but I hope you can give yourself a break. All of this is so confusing and scary, it is natural to try to make ourselves feel better. And when stress levels are so high, it is hard to always make the right decision. You did not waste 8 months of sober time. That is YOURS. You made a mistake last night and learned from it. Let it remain in "yesterday" and get back to the life you want today. I canceled my haircut yesterday, feeling awful as I did it. It is tragic that people like you who provide essential services that most of us take for granted are going to be so harshly affected. :hug:

You're right, [MENTION=20191]Pavati[/MENTION], it is a very important time for us to be here for one another. We have been forced onto an emotional rollercoaster much like the one addicted drinking put us on. And while it seemed like we had no control over that one, we really don't over this one and it is frightening. I would be happy to give my phone number to any nester who wants someone to text, facetime, or talk to.

Oh, [MENTION=23208]wagmor[/MENTION], it is so clear to us how kindly you and your wife have tried to treat your dad. He might have entered into the living arrangement with a bit of a chip on his shoulder and that has affected how he sees everything. My FIL was that way when he pretty much had to live in a duplex we own. It took a medical crisis for my husband with FIL being my #1 helper before he felt useful and worthwhile. We all need to be needed. Maybe your dad will find ways to help you guys over the next few tough weeks, helping himself at the same time.

I hope that as the weeks pass people realize this is a great time to work with you to be ready for when life opens up again. I haven't done much yet but I'm planning to do all the things I resented not being able to do as I traveled so often to be with/help family. Of course now I'm agonizing over not seeing any of them (and now would be happy to give up all my personal interests to be with them!) but am really determined to try to avoid having more regrets about doing nothing but watching the news and being miserable for the next several weeks or more. As part of that, I'm making myself get cleaned up and dressed, even if I'm staying home all day. I know I could easily slide into wearing 'daytime pajamas' if I'm not careful.

I used to bug my kids by telling them to be "nicer than necessary". I think it is especially important now, including to ourselves. xx

[julia1970]

Re: Newbies Nest

day 78. not feeling well. these are the bad days after tapering down the ad's (after about 9 days it turns kinda dark inside) and i'm still feelng exhausted. the awkward atmosphere in my city doesn't help.
having weed cravings again, wanting to disappear into a haze. but then i think of how buddhist guru's handle difficult things and that helps a bit.

hope you all are well

[Byrdlady]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hang in there, Julia. They are just thoughts....you KNOW you don’t need that fix. You have proven you can live without it. If you did it today, you can do it tomorrow! Rinse and repeat.
I'm not eligible for unemployment because I resigned (wasn’t fired or laid off).
It was a beautiful day today, we got out and walked Rubi. The place is a ghost town, just a weird time.
Pauly, right back up on the horse. You know how it’s done...one day at a time.
Stay safe, everyone! Byrdie

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good evening Nesters,

Walked the dog, made a loaf of bread & a pot of mushroom soup & that took up most of the day, haha!! I really think we’re in this for the long haul so we may as well develop some new habits now & avoid the struggling down the road. Our Governor just announced all non-life sustaining businesses are to shut down by 8 pm tonight or will face hefty fines. That kind of seals the deal, don’t you think? We all need to pay attention now so we can end up having a healthy & brighter future.

Pauly, it wasn’t worth it, am I right? It never was before & that is why we all chose to quit. Get back on your AF program, you haven’t done any damage yet. We all want to move forward together :hug:

Julia, hang in there & make sure you’re eating some healthy food. You’re healing from a lot, you need the extra nutrition.

Wags, my Dad lived with us for years & we never saw eye to eye on anything. I feel for you & hope some brightness moves toward you!

NS, Byrdie, Pav & everyone, hello!
Wishing a safe night in the nest for all!

Lav

[available]

Re: Newbies Nest

afternoon nesters

Another busy day, the stress levels are high but i just need to have some down time and relax. Its hard doing that with knowing how much work i have. Our doctors are now not seeing any patients in clinic, even new patients which is hard. The patients have waited months for an apt and are pretty distressed but we have to protect as many people as we can. I am finding that most people dont realise how bad it will get if we dont take precautions now. Elderly people dont understand technology and are used to being in front of the doctor so i am prepping them to write down questions, ask for scripts if needed and to call me if they forget anything.

The highlight of my day was that i did get 24 rolls of toilet paper and 6 bottles of almond milk. I went to aldi after the mile line went down and still managed to get what i wanted. they are pretty organised and well stocked. My problem is if the girls move back in that i have two extra mouths to feed and if they dont i will have extra but that will always get used. Its the small things in life that make you happy, like toilet paper!

Pauly, i think it has flitted across all of our minds that a drink would be great for our stress levels, i know i have but then i think that i would not be able to afford al, i would not be able to buy enough al to keep me going and i really dont want to head down that route. You have not wrecked those 8 months of sobriety but please stop and move on, we cant make the world what it was a few weeks ago by drinking, we cant change what is happening by drinking and we cant block it out by drinking (except for those few hours of being pissed). I know i would kill more for a fag than a drink but i think, god i cant afford to buy them either. food is where my money is going. Sending you a cyber hug.

Wags, that is a tough one with your dad, maybe this virus is scaring him also and he is feeling helpless. you are his daughter, parents are there to protect you and keep you safe. I know my mother is so stubborn. I put in an application for her to get her groceries home delivered and she tells me not to worry about her she will be fine. Im worrying about the whole world atm (it feels like it).

G, im lucky my psychologist is having phone apts, she knows my anxiety is going to be high. I will be taking her up on that.

Time for a nap then a walk with Carl. LC, carl is just gorgeous, he is loving me being home with him. I hope you and the girls stay safe.

take care xx

[STEADFAST]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hello again, Nesters,

Ava, you sound great, despite being so busy at work and all :hug: Just a few short weeks ago I finally felt in a position to suggest a coffee catch-up with you and Mr G, but now Covid19's a thing I guess it'll have to wait

This present time really does feel overwhelming. I'm trying hard not to feed into any of the panic or negativity, but need to articulate my own fears (mostly of the 'unknown') somehow. I know we will all get through this, but it could take a while.

People are sharing lots of good advice in The Nest, something I'm very grateful for.

Peace and strength to everyone,
Steady