Newbies Nest

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Greetings Nesters,

Almost 7 pm & the sun is out again after a cloudy afternoon & a quick moving thunderstorm. Goofy weather, haha!!

Kensho, thanks so much for the beautiful cake Working on year #12 now, feels good! Glad you are OK despite the non-paying client, ugh.

Wags, congrats on gathering more clients over the weekend, yay!

Pauly, you’ll get the hang of making deliveries, I’m sure! Smile big for those big tips

Julia, glad you are enjoying life more & more as each day goes by.

Hello to Pav, G, Byrdie & everyone!

Wishing a safe night in the nest for all.

Lav

[Byrdlady]

Re: Newbies Nest

We really ARE in a unique position with this pandemic. We are accustomed to living one day at a time, and I think that’s just what is needed here. There are many things still in our control so I’m trying to keep my focus on those.
Kensho, thank you for the kind words. I learned everything I know from YouTube U. Ha. Yes, believe it or not, I watched YouTubes to learn about cakes and cookies. That was a great chicken cake you gave Lav, I love it! If your kids have any questions, I will happily answer. My heart goes out to you trying to manage work and kids at home.
These are trying times and it will take all of our extra efforts to weather this storm. If I can help anyone struggling, please let me know, I seem to have plenty of time these days.
Im not even sure Butt Bumps are allowed now, how about a 6’ hug? XOXO, Byrdie

[available]

Re: Newbies Nest

evening nesters

Work is nearly back to normal which is great, i do seem to spend my day replying to emails, following up on emails and staying organised. I have to move my office out of the spare room and of course that is a work in progress. i have decided that moving my workspace should be done in office time so that is a bonus.

My daughter in quarantine facetimed me twice and its hard to think of anything to say when you yourself are home all day. I did get dressed in my walking gear this morning and went for a walk this afternoon. I have to get in the habit of doing that. Carl enjoyed his time out and so did i. It was lovely to see families out spending time together, i had not seen that often, there are more people out walking and i had a lovely chat to a man who was sitting on his front step. We all miss the human contact that we have taken for granted. Everyone was just friendlier, at a distance which i found to be a great positive.

Yes Byrd we do have the bonus of living our lives one day at a time and really that is all we can do at the moment.

I have started to eat our rations ha ha. Its either that or we will starve before total lockdown. The kids just laugh at me.

Glad to see everyone is well and keeping on track. One year not smoking for me tomorrow. I still cant believe i actually have done it but then again i never believed i could give up drinking.

take care xx

[Pavati]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi, All:

Byrdie - virtual butt bumps are ALWAYS ok.

Julia - sounds peaceful. I agree that I am most worried about people who have lost their jobs and livelihoods. CA just ordered this stay in place through April at least I don't know how some will get through it. It is financial catastrophe for so many - how will they climb their way back? Maybe some of you? Narilly? I feel extremely grateful to have a stable job that is essential, and my husband does also. I am working on figuring out the best way to help. Unlike you, however, I also worry. I think my biggest worry about myself is ending up in the hospital alone with no one able to visit (or one of my loved ones). It seems so awful that you have to stay away from people who are so sick. I get it, and I understand that my worrying about it won't change any outcome, but I do worry. I meditated this morning and I'll keep practicing my self care.

I don't have much to add. I get what you're saying, Ava. Coming up with new things to say can be challenging! I want to tell everyone about my inner thoughts but that doesn't always go over so well...

Hope you are doing as good as can be expected. I would take Byrdie up on her offer of support if you need. Let's help each other through this!

Pav

[KENSHO]

Re: Newbies Nest

AVA, isn't it *lovely* how friendly people are being? We, too, are seeing so many people out walking. I guess its easier to see how we all need each other. The kids are a l little sad that they aren't having social interaction with other kids. We need to arrange a video chat or something.

Julia, I love those "all is well" moments - please say them loud and pass the good vibes on! We need to share them! I seem to have a few good days, a couple great, and then a few downers. SO I appreciated your calm confidence. I was feeling a bit down yesterday.

We tried to have a "schedule" yesterday with the kids and school. Though generally I think that is a fabulous idea, I didn't enjoy feeling like I had to get up early and slog through the motions - without the normal joys that I get with doing that. So I think I will be a little looser with my schedule so I can feel like I am getting some of the fun of playing hooky. I still will get things done, as I have a list of a few things to check off every day - but I NEED that pleasure of sleeping a little later, and taking the time to do "X".

My daughter saw me reading this site last night and said this, "If you could drink like (our friend), and have a little alcohol sometimes, would you do it? Because if you could, Daddy would be really happy. But I like you better not drinking." I told her that it doesn't work like that for me - that I WOULD be a casual drinker if I could, but that I drank enough that I will always want more and it will take over my thinking and be bad for me. She changed the subject, but I like that she is so open about it. I just try to tell her matter-of-fact and not hide things from her. She can handle it!

The sun is bright and warm this am, and the birds are happy. We have the door cracked and a crisp air is coming in, coffee in hand. Our rewards this afternoon once school is done? Give the dog a bath, and open the box on the stairs that was shipped from Grandma - which I happen to know contains easter candy. The little things make the motivation!

Happy no-drinking to everyone.

Byrdie, I would seriously LOVE to have you show the kids something about cake decorating - just not sure how it would work. They would love your projects, AND your accent; I would love if you could meet them. If you can think of how to record or face time some of your artistry - I would gladly enroll them in your class! :heartbeat:

[narilly]

Re: Newbies Nest

Happy Un Hung Tuesday everyone.
Ken, that is a great conversation you had with your daughter. Over the years I have to talked to my kids quite a bit about drinking and I think it paid off. They both really seem aware of it and don't party even close to as much as I did.

It is freezing here today and overcast but we are all healthy so that is good.

Have a good one everybody and stay safe.

[NoSugar]

Re: Newbies Nest

Yeah, I was just starting to get into this Butt Bumping thing when even that got canceled! We can do it here, though :butt::butt:

It sounds like we're all trying to get through this with the best attitudes and outlooks possible. That seems like a good approach to me given that we have no control over what is going on anyway. We might as well concentrate on the things in our lives for which we actually do have some input.

I had a conversation with a friend who of course is horrified by the virus and what many people are experiencing but is enjoying many things about this new life we're living - the slower pace, reduced expectations, etc. It struck me how it really is our thinking that creates our reality. What is going on "out there" is objectively happening but while some people think it is the worst thing imaginable and are constantly anxious and overwrought, others think and feel differently - and even find some contentment. So when my apocalyptic thinking starts, I try to remember that I could choose to think differently, like my friend, and feel a little better. Whether my heart is racing in anxiety or I'm sitting calmly will not affect the outcome at all so I might as well try to be as comfortable as possible while we wait. And wait.

The way people are treating one another now reminds me of how it was after 9/11. It would be great if we could keep it up well beyond the virus. It makes for such a nicer world. I'll be glad to be done with the frequent facetime calls with no news to share, though! No one wants to be talking about the real news and nothing much happens to any of us, so what to talk about??? I most enjoy my FTs with one grandson - we enter into a pretend world and hang out there for about an hour each day. Since he is 'in charge', I pretty much just say the lines I'm given and off we go. I would never have the patience for this in my normal life so I guess this is one Quarantine Blessing I can name.

Kensho, you might be sparing your kids years of misery because you are honest with them now. They are fortunate to have you for a mom.

I'm currently making masks. It turns out they might be useful in 'flattening the curve' if we all wore them when out and about. I wish our government had been more honest about why we were being discouraged from wearing them (because HCWs need the limited supply of commercial masks more!!) rather than suggesting they were of no benefit and might give false confidence.

I hope all nesters are well and find some peace in all this chaos. xx, NS

[KENSHO]

Re: Newbies Nest

NS... what fabrics are acceptable for sterile use preventing microscopic bugs? I have thought about doing this, as I have tons of fabric swatches from design, and a sewing machine, but wonder if my fabrics would actually work?

[NoSugar]

Re: Newbies Nest

For regular people on the street, a double layer of cotton (like for quilting) is supposed to be quite effective. The point is to not share your cough/sneeze/breath water droplets with others or let theirs get you. These are not the super dense requirements needed for medical personnel (N95). However, due to shortages of even surgical masks, some hospitals are accepting homemade donations because they offer more protection than nothing at all. You might be able to find some online guidance about the kind of fabrics you have around.

[julia1970]

Re: Newbies Nest

Kensho i'm really touched by your conversation with your daughter, the openness and care of it.

and i like this conversation here very much. thank you all.

i do feel quite peaceful, and the nice thing is, that when i had a moment i didn't, i knew what to do and just made time for it before all else. and after that i felt spacious and calm again.
i also like the smiles in the oark. people are minding each other more. i wish the same would go for the homeless and fugutives, but i'm rather afraid that in their case it'll turn out to be the opposite.

one year of non-smoking is so great Ava!

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Tuesday evening greetings Nesters!

Dark, damp & a bit chilly here today so I skipped the walk with my dog. I think she was actually grateful, haha!!!
Great to see everyone posting & feeling connected :hug:

Ava, a big CONGRATS to you on your 1 year smoke free :welldone:
That was the hardest quit, don’t you agree? Keep up the good work & know that you’ll never have to go thru THAT again!

I did go out for groceries today & I noticed people with concerned faces, eyes down & thought Wow, they all look so scared. That was kind of sad to see & I hope they can find some calmness once they get back home. I won’t be out for another week or so but I hope people don’t stress themselves out. We all need to find some peace with this viral situation.

Hello to all & wishing everyone a safe night in the nest!

Lav

[STEADFAST]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi Nesters,

Trying to get a routine going to cope with the 'social distancing' and general feelings of unease. Arranged to do some weight training at home with an on-line program. Working on a writing project. Taking walks round the neighbourhood and communicating via phone and Facebook. Must work harder at setting up a plan for each day, otherwise it's too easy to doze on couch and wake up feeling awful. Partner has beers, wine, whiskey and weed :cuss:

However, I DO NOT DRINK, and am proud to preserve my sobriety.

Take care everyone, one day at a time,
Steady

[Pavati]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi, Everyone:

NS, I was reading about those masks. It seems the Czech republic has a policy that you HAVE to wear a mask all of the time and their rate of increase plummeted. There was a doctor talking about wearing masks if for no other reason then to remind you not to touch your face. I have neither the ability nor the fabric to make one, but I think I can tap into a family member. Maybe...

Changing thinking is HARD. I try to meditate, exercise, write gratitude lists, laugh, connect, write, read, make a schedule, be productive. I can still get into that swirl of worry. My husband is usually an even-keeled, calm, non worrier, and I can usually pick up off of his energy. He is unusually anxious and worried right now, so maybe that is not helping either. It doesn't help that I have developed a cold (not sure how given how little I've gone out and how much I've washed my hands), and my coughing has us all on edge. Luckily no fever... Working on it.

One thing I can say for certain is that I have looked longingly at his margarita/beer/whiskey more times than one. I KNOW that drinking one of those would very quickly take me out of my anxiety and relax me instantly. Alcohol is very good at that. I have been playing that one out, though, and the quick relief does NOT bode well for the long run. Reality is so screwed up right now, I am very grateful to have all of my wits about me through this. I can't imagine if I was worried about making sure I had THAT supply as well as everything else. As this drags on, I know we will all be tempted. Remember to reach out for help and stay the course. Even if I DID have that one drink (as if it would only be one), when it wore off, the crap would still be true and I'd just have a headache and a desire to escape again...

I guess this post was all about me. Thanks for "listening."

Love and good health to you all!
Pav

[narilly]

Re: Newbies Nest

Happy Un Hung Wednesday everyone.

Yeah, Pav, everyone, drinking will not make this situation better but if anyone knows how to change thinking it is us! We changed the way we think about AL (used to love him but now he is a jerk) and now we can change the way we think about this situation. (time to slow down, meditate, focus on ourselves)
WE will get through this.

Pav, hopefully this cough goes away. I am trying not to go anywhere except to buy groceries every 2 weeks, its pretty tough for sure.

We have some masks in the garage which I will probably wear when I go out. That is interesting about the Czech Republic.

SLO, hang in there, that has to be tough.

Stay safe everyone and don't drink today. xo

[NoSugar]

Re: Newbies Nest

Well I shopped during Old People Hours at the grocery store today for the first time in a couple weeks. Shelves weren't so bare so maybe the hoarding is abating. I believe the masks serve some benefit vs the virus on a population level, so it is worth wearing them, but on a personal level, I felt more at ease when I had to pass near a shelf stocker or other shopper. Anything that improves mental health sounds good to me!

I agree with this, Nar: "but if anyone knows how to change thinking it is us". We have practice for what is needed!

Steady, I'm sorry you have to be around all that booze your partner drinks. Your pride in your sobriety will keep you safe :hug:.

Pav, I think my temporary relief from a drink would be so short as to be meaningless. I think I would feel so anxious with the first sip. I would have to gulp it down and get drunk FAST if I was to have any escape. And like you said, this mess would be here when I woke up and I'd have caused a whole lot more problems for myself. It is a good thing that we don't drink!

Lav, my husband and I independently took our 12.5 y old dog walking TOO MANY TIMES. A couple days ago it was looking like we might have done her in but a couple days rest has rejuvenated her, thank goodness. Now, we're limiting her walks! I haven't walked without a dog in over 30 years. It is going to feel weird doing it!

Julia, you're like my friend who is able to find peace in these tumultuous times. That is a gift.

Happy April Fools' Day and ONE WHOLE YEAR of not smoking, Ava! You did it! :welldone:

Byrdie, I hope you're finding some structure that helps you feel a little better. You really got slammed having your job end and this virus begin at about the same time. Please take care of you :heart:.

Well, my boss called to see if I could talk on the phone this afternoon. There sure is no way to wiggle out of things anymore now that everyone knows that none of us go anywhere!!

Take care, NS