Newbies Nest

[NoSugar]

Re: Newbies Nest

yes my man is supportive but i don't want to see him now. i want to be alone. i know it would be better to go to him, but i will only get annoyed because i want to be by myself.

I understand that desire to isolate, Julia. The thing is, it is coming from the part of you that wants to be able to check out without witnesses. That isn't the part of your brain you need to be listening to if your goal is to quit using. If quitting again is the plan, the rational, unaddicted part of your brain, the real you, needs to put things in place to carry it out -- no substances in your home, companionship, other rewarding/calming activities, etc. You aren't being disloyal to your pup by moving on. He'll always be with you. Take care, NS

[Byrdlady]

Re: Newbies Nest

Belle, so good to see you. I fancy myself as a chef, too (delusions of grandeur, in my case). Maybe you can have a conversation with hubs about AL in your space AND in your food. Here is what I figured out....there are other recipes that don’t involve AL. You see, I used it as an excuse to have wine in the house. Truth was, I was trying to justify it. But all it takes is that little sliver of opportunity and we are off to the races. AL in food may seem harmless to most, but to us, it’s different. I may be fanatical about it, but I don’t eat food with AL in it even though I know the AL cooks off. There are plenty of other recipes. Trust me, hubs’ can’t read minds on a good day, so spell it out for him (sorry guys, at least my hubs can’t). This is hard enough so letting people know how they can help is very useful. Good luck.

Julia, I’m so sorry about your dog. That is a very tough piece of business. You gave him an awesome home and life, what else could we ask for? He did his job beautifully and you did yours. It is hard and no words of mine can heal the pain and emptiness you feel. Please know we are thinking of you constantly and grieving with you. Gosh, that is just awful.

Pav, I got my carrier today and I love it and so does Rubi. I have a basket on my bicycle that I tried using, but she is 9 pounds and it is hard to steer with a wiggly dog in the basket, so for both of our safety, I don’t do that anymore. We’ll see how it works out. It won’t be the first $20 I’ve wasted.

Pauly, I got after my bangs yesterday, dear lord! How the heck? I’ve seen my bangs trimmed 10,000 times, why can’t I do it? I’m going to need some MAJOR maintenance after all this. I have a new appreciation for my hair dresser.

We lost a neighbor on the next street yesterday. She’d had a series of strokes over the years and was frail as could be. Her hubs is in terrible shape, too, we all thought he would go before she did. What an awful time for that family. How do you grieve with our gathering? They have a daughter, SIL and grandson in another state, not sure what the heck they are going to do, it’s a bad situation.

Makes me grateful to say that not much going on here. Stay safe and healthy, everyone. Butt bumps, Byrdie

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Greetings Nesters,

Heavy rain coming down now just as promised. The sun may return by Saturday, hope so anyway.

Julia, there’s a lot of steps you go through when grieving. Don’t allow yourself to be stuck in one. I have loved all my dogs & still miss them but seeing them suffer is the worst. Relief will take over when you finally allow yourself to believe that he’s no longer suffering & you can keep the good memories. I’ve had prints of my last few dogs done on canvas squares & have them hanging in my kitchen. I spend a lot of time here in the kitchen so I see them & feel close. Please don’t torture yourself unnecessarily :hug:

Belle, how’s it going today?

Hello to all & wishing a safe night in the nest for all!

Lav

[paulywogg]

Re: Newbies Nest

Morning nesters, Pav salons will be one of the mid to last things to open just cuz of the close contact from what the governor said last night, yea I don't like everyone but I TRY to make an effort haha, Kensho, yes it's gross sometimes, especially in the area I worked in, haircuts are only $8 so you can imagine the people that pulls in, plus it's in a bad neighborhood, the owner wants to raise prices to $12.95 but I know those people aren't gonna do that, they're too cheap with the $8 sometimes, they'll probably go to one of the $5 shops a few streets over knowing them, Byrdie, glad the carrier is working for your fur baby sorry about your neighbor that's really sadwaves to the gang and wishes for a happy AF day

[wagmor]

Re: Newbies Nest

My sweetheart died on Sunday.
I am so very sad.

I am posting only because today I want to quit smoking pot again. A few days was okay, but enough now.

I'm so sorry Julia. Losing a furry family member is SO hard and so heartbreaking. Please know that many of us (maybe all of us) understand your pain as well as an outsider ever can, and we walk with you.

[wagmor]

Re: Newbies Nest

Belle - so glad to see you! As others have said, getting al totally out of your house is probably going to be key. And since you've recognized that there is a "witching hour" that is hardest for you when you don't have a plan, I would say making sure you have a plan is a high priority. I can remember struggling with a similar thing - later in the day, when drinking would have started (acceptable drinking that is - I also had a bad problem with day drinking) - it was like I needed a replacement activity to get me over the hump of craving or habit or whatnot. Is there something healthier that you can incorporate into your late afternoons and evenings that can become your new happy hour or evening ritual? We are with you!

Pav - the doggie backpack we got is called the K9 Sportsack and it works really well for our 15 lb Jack Russell mix pupper. She is comfortable and so am I. We eased her into it - first just a quick in-and-out with a few treats while in. Then around the block, still getting periodic treats along the way. She quickly came to associate the pack with "good" things and now is a pretty willing rider. It lets her come along on longer hikes and walks, which is good for all.

Kensho - nope, I wouldn't want to cut a neighbor's hair either, especially one I don't really like.

Byrdie - uhoh, I think "cutting your own bangs" is an official stage of pandemic stay home-itis! I'm sure you did a fine job and it'll get you through hopefully until that sector of society re-opens.


Gotta fly for now - early class this morning. Happy Friday-into-Saturday to all of you. Tix to boozeville come at an exorbitant price so don't even think about it!

[Pavati]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi, All:

Julia, I think NoSugar put it perfectly. It is that desire to isolate and "take care of ourselves" that is a step toward drinking and using again. As humans, we need community and love, and you have the right to have that. Let your boyfriend in, let your friends in. You got this.

Nar, ice cream is a biggie here, too. I made a proclamation that I wasn't going to eat ice cream during the week. I came out with a little bowl on Tuesday and my son called me out on it. Thank goodness he's here. I had an orange for dessert last night and it did the trick. We'll need an ice cream site when this is all over.

Byrdie - sorry about your bangs. I had a zoom meeting yesterday evening and it was CLEAR one of the participants had done her own bangs - not very well at all. Pauly, I think you'll be able to charge a lot more than $8 for a haircut when this is all over - there will be a LONG backlog of need...

Wags, thanks for the recommendation.

Kensho - what are the symptoms? That sounds not good.

Well, Friday is here. I am so HAPPY. Mostly because I get to sleep in and laze about in the morning instead of getting up and out. No tickets to Boozeville here. Besides, I heard the station was closed.

Happy SOBER Friday,
Pav

[julia1970]

Re: Newbies Nest

today i will stay clear of weed. i want to feel everything and be there with it. it doesn't feel right to suppress.
it's hard to turn to others, eat food, or anything. i feel my whole being still focussed on rescuing him and taking care of him, soothing him. it's like when i shift my attention to something else, that would be a terrible thing.
but i'll eat somthing tonight and see my man and try to stay in the here and now.

[Guitarista]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hola friends near and not so far,

Friend Kensho! Sheesh re that diagnosis. I don't know much about it. I hope it's a manageable thing and doesn't disrupt life for u. The plus has to be you don't drink anymore so your immune system would be stronger for that at least. Please keep us posted mi amiga.

I cut my own hair. It's strange as we still have hair salons allowed to operate here, but physical distancing rules are still in place. Not sure how that's done?!

Hi Julia. Take care of yourself. :-)

Hi Belle and evabody!

It's only friday not a freakin free pass to no cottin pickin boozeville, you savvy pilgrims? Looks like the station's been pulled down over here. I think they're building a community centre.

[narilly]

Re: Newbies Nest

Happy Friday everyone.

I bet you look good with your new haircut G. I cut mine too, you gotta do what you gotta do.

I have been having the weirdest dreams lately, anybody else?

Talk soon.

Don't drink today.- hang in there Julia.

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Greetings Nesters,

I have my son’s 14 year old golden retriever barking in my ear, oy! She will be here all weekend & usually settles down eventually, haha!

Julia, glad to see you’re making some plans for the day. We all have to take baby steps away from the grief when we lose a fur friend. They remain in our hearts & memories forever.

Wag, Pav hope you both had a good day.

G, do you make haircut house calls? LOL Mine is getting horrendous & I will not attempt to cut it myself.

Narilly, how about you? Do you make house calls? You are a lot closer than G Haha!

Hello to all & wishing everyone a safe night in the nest!

Lav

[julia1970]

Re: Newbies Nest

didn't get high yesterday. i want to stay clean today as well.

[Pavati]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi, All:

Way to go, Julia. In the words of Mr. G, the only way out is through. Hang tough.

I have actually liked the results of some of my friends getting haircuts. In particular, one friend always has a super short 'do. She looks GREAT with it a bit longer. I keep telling her that - maybe she'll get self conscious. Nar and G- you're brave!

Good luck pup sitting, Lav. That sounds like a big job.

It is a slightly chilly day here so I am thinking some house cleaning, cooking, and reading. Should be about all I can handle.

Happy Weekend.
Pav

[Pavati]

Re: Newbies Nest

Having trouble posing. Wants to do it twice.

[Byrdlady]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hey all!
Julia, nice job of getting that Day 1 behind you. Rinse and repeat!
It’s a beautiful day here, I’m about to go out and enjoy some sunshine.
Im noticing our local weather girl’s hair looks like it was cut with a chainsaw. Yikes! One side is noticeably longer than the other and it’s sticking out? Maybe she just got up from a nap?

Nar, I understand that strange dreams are quite common these days. Dang, I forget why, it has something to do with our sleep patterns and waking up during the dream part of sleep.

I hope everyone has a safe and happy day. Don’t drink no matter what and no matter who! Byrdie