Newbies Nest

[Slo]

Re: Newbies Nest

That’s a cute, funny story about your dog, KENSHO!

Glad your weekend away was restorative, Pavati! (Except for falling behind on the regular routine -I hate that too.)

Well, it’s just the time now to face what to do with our marriage -young daughter is graduating from high school this year and going away to college, so the nest will be empty. I thought we’d see how it went this Fall, but he surprised me a couple weeks ago by saying that he wants a divorce now. It has been an awful feeling to keep getting emails from your husband for condos and apartments that he wants you to move into. I said I’m staying through Spring and Summer to finish raising our daughter, and to keep the upcoming commitments that are already on the calendar. I’m kind of hoping we can change our minds. But the ball is not really in my court anymore.

That’s so hard for you with all the heat and hot flashes, Ava. A broken thermostat. And you too, Lav! Thankfully, I don’t get those.

Wishing all a comfy night in the Nest.

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Greetings Nesters,

Last night’s storm dropped a whole lot of rain & it was very windy but no damage done. Just the first of many spring/summer storms around here.
We drove back to where our relatives are buried, left flowers, stopped for a quick visit with our daughter to drop off tons of eggs & an Easter sweet for our granddaughter. Stopped for a late lunch then drove another hour home. Haven’t accomplished much of anything else today but that’s OK.

Slo, I don’t think I would take kindly to being told what to do after so many years of marriage. I went thru something similar with my husband a year after I went AF. He suddenly decide he wasn’t happy so he left for 4 years then returned without apology or excuse. He’s chronically depressed, psychiatrist diagnosed & refuses to take meds. You just can’t make people want to be happy. Watch out for yourself :hug:

Pav, glad you had a nice weekend. The house will be fine, haha!

Kensho, some dogs are just so into treats Lol

Wags, good to see you, everything is fine here & hope you are too.

Hello to all & wishing a safe night in the nest for everyone!
Lav

[available]

Re: Newbies Nest

Morning nesters

Well day two of holidays and its so nice not to open that damn laptop and listen to patients wanting things all day. I will check my emails though.

Slo, that is sad when a marriage ends, i walked out of mine after 17 years, i told him ten years before that if he didnt change i was leaving and when the kids were old enough, i left. he is now with a good friend of mine and after the initial shock to the children and I, that is fine with me. She complains about him and i feel relieved i am not with him anymore. Why do you have to move out? As my psychologist says to me "deal with what you can control and the rest just doesnt matter much". I can control me and how i respond to situations but i cant control others thoughts and actions. I am feeling a bit more human after taking my Happy Hormones which are natural supps thank goodness. I know not to think i am ok and go off them again.

Lav, i hope the storm just passed you right on by.

Love your puppy story Kensho, they are just adorable animals. My carl is scratching up a storm so gave him a human antihistamine, after googling it, apparently it helps. I hope so as he kept me awake all night.

Watching our male politicians grapple at looking human and not bullying, sexist twats to female politicians atm. Quite an eye opener to see all the complaints about sexist comments, harrassment etc in parliament, very sad that dont take responsibility for their actions. If it was in a normal workplace the person would be sacked immediately but "johnny didnt mean to do it and will change" attitude is annoying. I think they forget that women have the right to vote now. My whinge for today!

take care xx

[wagmor]

Re: Newbies Nest

Ava - glad you're getting a holiday from work. We all need at least days off throughout the year, and a week or more at a time is probably better for most people. Sorry to hear about the problems with some of your parliament members. Hopefully women WILL use their voices and help vote out the sexists and bullies. I wish that would occur here too actually, but a shocking number of women (I should specify: white women) support some of the worst misogynists and bigots.

Lav - glad you're safe. Sounds like you had a nice pre-easter outing.

Kensho - your lab sounds pretty smart! It sounds like the dog version of, "Ask mom for lunch money, then ask dad for lunch money, and hope they don't communicate with each other."


Hellos and waves to Pav, Slo, Byrdie, and everyone else stopping by the nest. Have great nights/days!

[Pavati]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi, All:

Slo, my thoughts are the same as Ava's - why do you have to move? Why doesn't he take up one of those condos? Sorry again.

Lav, so jealous of your rain. Our reservoirs are low and it is another dry year.

Gotta run to an early meeting. Happy SOBER Tuesday,

Pav

[narilly]

Re: Newbies Nest

Happy Un Hung Tuesday everyone.

SLO, tell him to move into a condo, sheesh...unless you want to move into a condo. I am sorry for what you are going through. It is such a hard thing to deal with. My hubs went through a 'I don't love you anymore' period but then came around after 6 months. It was 6 months of hell though and I swear I had a nervous breakdown. Big hugs from me xo

We have had some moisture here over the past few days so it is not so dry now. It sucks when it is too dry out, I am with you on that Pav. You guys need some rain down there for sure.

Hey Lav, you raaawk as someone would say. Easter at your house would be fun with all those chickens around.

Yeah Ava, it is crazy what politicians can get away with, police too. They just get their hand's slapped or leave WITH pay. What the heck is that?

It is a beautiful day here and I have the day off. Our cases have been going up so we have been busy. The variant is becoming the dominant strain here so that is another concern. I seem to be working alot which is fine, it is a good job for now.

Take care everyone and stay sober.

[Guitarista]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hola evabody.

Sister Slo, sorry to hear that. Take care of yourself. You're a fully fledged AF Goddess warrior now, so i'm sure you'll be ok.

Narilly, who could not love you??!! It does not compute. Another Goddess Warrior, amazing inside and out.

All good here. Busy day, but it's warm in me little ol heart.

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good evening Nesters,

Just heard on the news that Covid case numbers are rising - it’s not over yet. There’s just too many ignorant individuals putting themselves in harms way (spring break, etc). I just cannot understand how any person can apparently have zero empathy for others. How selfish can people really be? I guess we’re finding out
Nice day here, no complaints from me. Rain again tomorrow even though we really don’t need any, figures haha!
I have no plans for Easter, same as last year. I’ll feel better about gathering family when we have more immunity. So, the Easter celebration waits another year.

Slo, thinking about you!

Ava, we have so many women hating politicians here it’s not funny. I donate to as many women’s campaigns as I can.
Glad you’re getting a break from work.

Pav, I’ll gladly share some of this rainfall with you. Drought conditions are not fun.

Wags, hope your day was good

Narilly, glad you like your job because it looks like it isn’t going anywhere for a while with the rise in cases. Let’s hope people get smarter this spring!!!

Hello to everyone else & wishing a safe night in the nest for all!
Lav

[wagmor]

Re: Newbies Nest

Quick fly-by to mark one more day AF. Hellos and waves to you all. Will catch up a bit more tomorrow!

[hulagirl]

Re: Newbies Nest

I wasn't scared, but brave. One night without wine. Sleep did not come to me. I was counting hours to get ready for work and the day. Did not make it through the second night. Every stress of the day was piled up. And became my excuse to drink the wine. and beer. again.

[Guitarista]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi Hulagirl! Long time no see mi amiga.

Did you return to drinking? Either way, How are things?

Hi Lav, Wags and all stopping by.

[Slo]

Re: Newbies Nest

Welcome back [MENTION=4610]hulagirl[/MENTION]! Lack of sleep makes everything so much harder, including going AF.

[MENTION=7261]Guitarista[/MENTION], we are both AF warriors now -both approaching 1000 days!!

COVID cases are still with us: my son-in-law just tested positive yesterday, after they went traveling for Spring Break. I just hope his wife, pregnant daughter, doesn’t get it. And two of our other daughters were exposed to him too.

HB asked me if I wanted the house, and I said no -not wanting to take on the financial and upkeep burden of a large family home, and live in it alone. But then he said he wants me out by Summer. Luckily a wise friend set me straight, and said that I do not have to go anywhere until this is settled, and said that I will be disempowered and put myself at a disadvantage if I vacate the family home. I am so thankful for a wise friend! And I do not want to be rushed.

Thank you for sharing your stories of tenuous and imperfect marriages, as I wonder and worry which way this is going to go. I feel less alone. And I have to remember what Kensho said; that hopefully either way I will be ok.

Let’s have a good AF day all around!

[Pavati]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi, All:
[MENTION=4610]hulagirl[/MENTION] how can we help? Are you ok? What if you made a deal that you would post here BEFORE you drank, no matter what? I found the toolbox to be a useful place to look when I was quitting - there are many ideas about how to surf that urge and make it through the "witching hour." Hope you're ok.

Nar - that is good you're getting work but the little uptick of the curve is alarming for sure. It is a race - vaccine vs. virus.

Slo - good for you for finding your power in this. Glad your friend had good advice.

Mr. G - warm heart - always.

Lav, sorry you'll miss your family again, but probably for the best. We usually have a picnic. Most of us are educators and are vaccinated so we're going to try, although the weather looks like it might not cooperate. We'll see...

Happy SOBER Hump Day,
Pav

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good evening Nesters,

Raining as promised which is fine but I’m not thrilled about the cold weather following, oh well.

Hulagirl, glad you dropped by the nest, make yourself comfortable & stay awhile. Those first few days are the hardest but you can get thru them if you make a good plan. What else can you do to handle your stress? Look in the Tool box for lots of great ideas.

Hi Wags, hope you are well.

Hi G!!

Slo, glad your friend was there for you. Do you know why your husband is in such a rush as to put a deadline on your moving? A little understanding goes a long way, if he’s willing to talk.
After my husband made a swift & unexpected exit he asked me what I was going to do. I said ‘nothing’. He was the one with an agenda, not me. Glad I stayed put especially as we had just built & moved into this house. He had to own his craziness, it had nothing to do with me. Hang in there :hug:

Pav, I’m not going to worry about Easter, there’s always next year, I hope
Hope your day was good.

Hello to all & wishing everyone a safe night in the nest!

Lav

[Pavati]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good MAE:

Just a quick hello this morning. Staying focused and staying sober.

Pav