Newbies Nest

[narilly]

Re: Newbies Nest

Happy Un Hung Monday everyone!

Byrdie, your chocolate creations look amazing. I would love to try some, YUM! You have a real talent there Miss Byrdie.

This week has been nuts, my Mom ended up in Emergency but is fine now. My MIL is in the hospital and was admitted 2 days ago. My niece ended up having surgery for a twisted ovary and my kid had a colonoscopy which turned out fine- no polyps etc. Out of all of this, everyone is fine except my MIL who is still in the hospital. She has a bunch of issues and is very confused so we will see if she is able to live on her own after this. CRAZY times!!!

Anyway, I am good. Sober and happy.
Wags, big hugs to your partner.
Ken, SLO, everybody, us quitting drinking effects everyone around us. It is a profound feeling when you think about it. I was talking to my daughter about quitting drinking yesterday. We talked about the fact that because I don't drink, the family does not drink much. Every meal we have, trip we go on, we are sober. If I was drinking we would All be drinking at all these events and it would definitely change the trajectory of our life.
Sober is much better.

have a good one everybody. Pav you sound great!

Don't drink today.

[Guitarista]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi Nar. That is huge!!

Take care evabody. Waves to y'all.

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Greetings Nesters,

After such hot weather we are now dealing with rain & clouds, much cooler temps & I’m OK with it, really
At least we didn’t have to spend hours watering everything haha!

Byrdie it’s time for you to open Byrdie’s Kitchen Creations
You do beautiful work & I’m happy you have found something meaningful to do. Keep up the good work!

Narilly, wow you sure do have a lot going on in your family. I hope your MIL gets better soon. Sometimes with the elderly something as simple as a UTI can cause massive confusion. The good thing is it’s a temporary thing when caused by an infection. Take care of yourself too :hug:

Pav, glad your weekend was good!!!

Hi G, you must be in a hurry, hope you are doing well!

Hello to all & wishing a safe night in the nest for everyone!

Lav

[wagmor]

Re: Newbies Nest

Nar - that's a LOT to have happen in the same week. Glad so much has already turned out ok, and I hope your MIL will have an easy path forward as well.

Byrdie - I'll have to look up Morgan Fairchild's posts so I can follow along. Your chocolate creations are amazing!

Lav - I hope that neighbor girl doesn't get hurt. Sounds like a less-than-great situation but maybe she'll learn to be safer and safer as she gets more experience.

Pav - your weekend sounds wonderful!

Ken and Slo - yes, sobriety can definitely help us not be dysfunctional communicators and to not react to others. It can still be very challenging though. I wish you both the best with your situations.


Hellos and waves everyone. Happy new weeks to you all!

[Pavati]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi, All:

Nar, what a stressful few days! Thank goodness you aren't drinking. Can you imagine trying to navigate that all while hungover? Or drunk? You couldn't just drop everything and drive to the hospital! I hope your MiL heals soon. Taking care of older parents is NOT for the weak...

Wags, this sounds weird, but I am celebrating your getting help with cleaning your house. It is worth it if it helps you relax, get exercise, unwind a bit. Enjoy both the clean house and the more time.

Kensho - my being sober really helped my reaction to my differences with my husband also. Because I stopped getting so emotional and reactive we are better able to have rational conversations. I would say our outright "fighting" has decreased tremendously. Another unexpected benefit to quitting drinking. Those more heated situations were not when I was drinking, but I think my negative feelings about myself and my uncertainty contributed to how I approached from a defensive position. Slo, I hope you get what you need.

Byrdie - amazing! Is there something inside those blocks? Perfect for a baby shower!

Mr. G - love it when you pop by. I hope you are doing well.

Happy SOBER Tuesday,
Pav

[NoSugar]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi, Nest. I just read back after several days away and it is so uplifting to read how well everyone is handling life - good and bad. Ever since I quit and especially this last year, I have a running commentary going in the back of my mind about how much better everything is because I'm not drinking. Sometimes that means that something that would have been awful is at least manageable but often, that something that would have seemed neutral to me is a source of joy and gratitude. I had stopped feeling much at all, and rarely if ever the positive emotions. It is nice to be alive again.

Somehow during my time of reading sober memoirs I missed Lit by Mary Carr. I've been listening to it on my many exercise and dog walks and think it might be the best memoir of its type. The author is the reader and her voice just brings her words to life. Anyway, if any of you hasn't read it, I highly recommend the audio book.

And here is the book I'm reading: Amazon.com
It was recommended to me by a family member to help me understand her depression.
The author makes the experience real for the reader and even better, her humor is the type I most appreciate so despite the topic, it is a very funny and enjoyable read.

Health and peace to all nesters, their friends, and family. xx, NS

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hey Nesters,

Nice coolish day here, yay!
We had the plumber here to hook up a water faucet right on the deck so it’s easier to water all these containers. I’m not a fan of hauling water at this age, haha!
I can’t even reach some of these hanging pots so now I have a hose with a wand type thing attached.

Wags, the neighbors are silent tonight, maybe they picked up on the negative vibes we had last evening. I’m not really a worrier but every summer since we moved here a kid has gotten killed riding those 4 wheelers. As a parent I just wouldn’t have allowed all that recklessness. Hope your day was good!

Pav, yay for less fighting. We’ve never been fighters because mine just clams. Up & removes himself from uncomfortable situations, maybe even worse IMHO. What can you do??

NS, good to see you. I agree that everything is better since we stopped d`rinking. Not perfect but definitely better

Hello to all & wishing a safe night in the nest for everyone.
Lav

[Slo]

Re: Newbies Nest

So many interesting posts!

Really love those baby blocks, Byrdie. And they look like they would take a long time to craft.

Nice solutions for the plants on the deck, Lav! They will be a lot easier to care for.

You missed ‘Lit’, NS? That’s a super good one. I read it -now wish I would have listened to it!

Speaking of caregiving (Wagmor, Narilly), my sis-in-law with dementia (HB’s sis) is getting worse fairly quickly, as tends to happen with younger dementia sufferers, and it’s getting more precarious to have her living alone. So we have to be over there quite a lot. So that’s where I spent my day. I’m thankful that some caregivers have been found and put in place recently, and that she has been amenable to it.

Those 4-wheelers are dangerous, on uneven terrain especially, and on wet grass.

I felt real low a few days ago, and ended up slugging three NA beers in a row...old patterns kicked in. At least it was with NA ones instead of real ones.

Have a nice night, all!

[wagmor]

Re: Newbies Nest

Slo - I'm so sorry to hear about your SIL. Dementia is hard to watch, care for, experience...there's just nothing easy about it. I too am glad you have caregivers in place and that she's amenable to having their help. When I first read your post I missed the "NA" part and I thought "Oh no!!!" The habit/behavior is still concerning, but at least you didn't introduce al back into your system.

Pav - thanks for celebrating my decision to get some paid help with cleaning. I've never ever hired anyone to provide that kind of help, and it will mostly be for my father's space, but it's a HUGE relief. Now I just have to resist the urge to go down and "pre-clean" before they come!

Lav - I hope no kid is killed riding a 4-wheeler this summer. I think that's all too common unfortunately. Great idea for watering the deck plants!

NS - thanks for the book suggestions. I haven't read or listened to either one so now I've got two more to add to my list. And isn't it wonderful to feel alive again, even when life is hard?


Hellos and waves to everyone. Hope you all have easy days and nights.

[Pavati]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi, All:

Checking in on a sober Wednesday. I have a JAM PACKED two weeks - events, dinners, good byes, retirements, graduations, all of it. It is stressful to look at my calendar and see it all. One day at a time...

Dementia is so very hard, Slo. My goodness you have a lot going on. That is the hardest caretaking I've ever done - glad you have some help.

Thanks for the recommendations, NS. I have read Lit probably three times. Maybe next time I'll get it on audio. I have been listening to podcasts by and with sober people lately - I find it helpful to hear about others' approaches.

Stay safe, nest.

Pav

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good evening Nesters,

Some big storm is approaching, can hear the thunder already. We actually need a good rain, just don’t like the thoughts of downed trees & power lines. I’m staying in, hope my chickens are smart enough to go in their house too, haha.
Having spent nearly 30 years in nursing I witnessed all sorts of dementia & it is truly heart breaking. It’s definitely one of the things my ‘hope I never get’ list. But I did also witness better treatments & understanding of the whole process over 3 decades. I always felt so bad for the families.

Hello to Slo, Wags & Pav & everyone.
Signing off before the power goes. Have a safe night in the nest everyone!

Lav

[wagmor]

Re: Newbies Nest

Pav - I hope your busy two weeks don't wear you out! As with sobriety, your "one day at a time" approach sounds healthy and wise.

Lav - fingers crossed that your big storm doesn't cause damage and that you all emerge unscathed.


Things are pretty good here. My wife is getting around better each day and has been able to start riding an exercise bike in PT. We have a stand here at home that you can put the rear wheel of a bike into, thus converting a regular bike into a stationary bike. We set ours up on the back deck so she can ride while looking at the gorgeous backyard she has designed and nurtured. I've been as busy as I want to be with work, and have been getting a few things ticked off my "to do" list as well. This coming weekend is our Memorial Day in the US and I've got most of three days off, so that'll be nice. Gone are the days of drinking away a long weekend, and good riddance to that.

Take care everyone, and stay safe!

[Slo]

Re: Newbies Nest

Enjoyed some great little bike rides over the last few days! I feel so much better when I can get in a morning ride in the glorious weather! But, we’ve gone quite cold out for today and tomorrow, then a busy weekend; so that’s over for awhile.

I’m glad for you too that you hired in a little cleaning help for your dad, [MENTION=23208]wagmor[/MENTION]. It makes sense to me. And you don’t need to pre-clean, just help him to pre-straighten. And the part of your own section is maybe making up for what your wife can’t do.

Pav, educators sure get slammed with a lot extras at the end of the school year! I feel for you. And a lot of drinking events to attend all in a row, too.

Dementia is on my list of things I definitely never want to get either, Lav. I will take alcohol addiction over dementia hands down. It bodes well for me, since my grandparents were both super sharp when they died at 99 and 93 years old. The other set was fine too.

The full super moon is finally over, and I look forward to finally feeling better; less tired, irritable, & craving.
Wish you all good days as well!

[Pavati]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi, All:

Sounds like a sweet set up for your wife, Wags. I'm sure she's dying to get out for a real ride - how long will that be? I don't know anyone who lives in the PNW and doesn't ride a bike...

Glad you're feeling better, Slo.

Hope the storm isn't too bad, Lav. We're preparing for fire season. Since so many of the fires start with downed power lines, we are also preparing for life without electricity. Two years ago our power was out for five whole days. It was quite difficult to live like that. Luckily I had power at work so I could get warm and charge everything, and restaurants had power.

Ah, Memorial Day weekend. The year I quit I had a bad one. Drank in the sun all day and then couldn't sleep all night. It felt so terrible I will never forget it. THANK GOODNESS that is over.

So Happy it's Thursday,
Pav

[narilly]

Re: Newbies Nest

Happy Un Hung Thursday everyone.

It is a beautiful day here in Calgary and I am spending it with my mom and daughter, taking my mom to appointment and going to the dog park. It is going to be very enjoyable.

Thanks for all your well wishes, you are the best!

I hope your fire season is not too bad this year Pav, and thank goodness the drinking is over. I remember drinking in the sun and gettin so s---faced and being hungover and having too much sun. Gross.

NS, sometimes when I read those drinking memoirs they make me feel like drinking, it is weird. I read the book by Mary Carr back in the day and it is really good.

Lav, hope the big storm is not too bad. Sometimes they are fun to watch unless they cause damage.

Wags, great about your wife. I hope she just keeps getting better.

Hello Byrdie, Slo, GMan, everybody.

Take it easy.
AND don't drink today.