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    Re: Newbies Nest

    Hi, All:

    Not much to report. We had a beautiful hike this morning, and swam across a lake at the end. Such a beautiful day here, although it is smokey and a little hot. But we went early, so am not in the cool living room.

    Kensho, I love how much you go camping. Do you have a camper? Car camp? Sounds like fun.

    Happy SOBER Saturday.

    Pav

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      Re: Newbies Nest

      Hola nester's,

      Thanks Slo. Camping is ace, not that i do a lot of it at the moment. Something on my radar big time! We have so much beautiful country here within an hour of town and of course anywhere beyond. Gee willicker's, just a day out of the city spent in nature makes a big difference to me.

      Have a nice weekend. Big waves and hello's to all. Surf's up don't u know!

      'I am part of all that I have met, yet all experience is an arch wherethro', gleams that untravelled world whose margins fade, forever and forever when I move'

      Zen soul Warrior. Freedom today-

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        Re: Newbies Nest

        Evening nesters

        A busy week again for me but i read here daily.

        Byrd, im like that with chocolate, its either all or nothing. as soon as i have one i just binge like i used to with al. i keep telling myself chocolate is not like al, but it so is.

        did a lot of gardening yesterday, repotting plants and getting them happy. today was miserable compared to yesterday but i managed to go for a walk late this afternoon. no enthusiasm but i definitely felt better when i went. it is now daylight till 6pm and it is just so nice. Carl just loves having a break from Bob. Bob loves carls tail, Carl doesnt like Bob playing with his tail.

        Slo, behaviour passed on is awful. my mother is like her mother and i swore i would not be like my mother and i am not. I am forever grateful to my psychologist for showing me how to deal with her behaviour and to get rid of the guilt i felt.

        Kensho, i kind of miss camping but i like the comforts now. We did a lot of camping when the kids were little as it was cheap. they have great memories and we always have a chat about it.

        Missing LC, Belle, Nar and steady.

        Take care xx
        AF free 1st December 2013 - 1st December 2022 - 9 years of freedom

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          Re: Newbies Nest

          A hike with a lake swim sounds perfect, Pav.

          I need to re-pot some plants too, before Summer is over. Kudos to you, Ava, for not repeating patterns! My mom acted like her mother too. But they were both oldest daughters in huge Catholic families, and oldest daughters in huge Catholic families don’t get to have childhoods of their own -they are required to be mother’s helper, and also the caretaker to all the younger siblings. They both developed nasty narcissistic personality disorders. I wish I didn’t ever act like my mother while raising children, but when under stress & duress, I would act like her. So I’m really proud of you for avoiding that!

          Good for you, Belle, for seeking some support for what you are going through as you make a major life transition. I need to find a counselor too, for some help getting through divorce. I waited until the RSVP due date, which was yesterday, to respond to my paternal family reunion on Sept. 11th. Finally had to ask HB if he was going, and he said No. When I asked why, he said, “Because we’re splitting up.” So it really is happening.

          Sunday Funday -have a relaxing one!
          Last edited by Slo; August 30, 2021, 04:32 PM.
          Once a pickle, never a cucumber again.

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            Re: Newbies Nest

            Good evening Nesters,

            Not much going on with me but i am watching the progress of Hurricane Ida. Looks like New Orleans took a hit like they did with Katrina 16 years ago today. I hope there’s no loss of life this time, buildings can be replaced.

            Slo, sounds like you finally have your answer about the divorce. I wish you tons of strength to stand & defend your interests. And I hope you have nearby support when needed. :hug:
            When I was a senior in high school I took a brand new course called ‘Behavioral Science’. It was a great intro to all the psychology & sociology courses I was about to take in college. That was when I learned that I dod not have to repeat bad family behaviors & it was such a relief to get that news!! I knew I was nothing like my dad & I wasn’t going to be a thing like him either!

            Ava, sounds like yuo are seeing seasonal changes too. I know my chickens are putting themselves to bed a full hour earlier now, haha!
            Carl is being a patient boy, good for him

            Hello to G & Pav! We used to do a fair bit of camping way way back, Lol. I also love the comforts too much now so can’t be bothered. We had a small camper before we had kids, then we got a bigger one when they came along. It was fun then but not so much now, haha! It is nice being out & enjoying nature for a few hours at a time

            Hello to all & wishing everyone a safe night in the nest!

            Lav
            AF since 03/26/09
            NF since 05/19/09
            Success comes one day at a time :thumbs:

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              Re: Newbies Nest

              G - Congrats on your album!!! That's really awesome, my friend.

              Pav - a hike and lake swim sounds like a wonderful way to spend a morning. Glad you were able to go early and avoid the worst of the heat and smoke.

              All of this talk about camping has made me want to go camping! My wife and I do a fair amount of it, although less so in the past year. Between caring for my dad and our dog, not to mention the minor issue of a pandemic shutting everything down for months, it has just been a lot harder to get out of town. Hopefully soon!

              I've been thinking about Nar too -- hope you are doing ok if you're reading these posts :heartbeat:

              Well, my tutoring docket is completely full or maybe over-full for the next 2-3 months. I'm so grateful to be able to make my living this way, doing something I enjoy so much, that truly helps people, and that gives me such tremendous flexibility with my schedule. Trying for that work-life balance that Kensho mentions from time to time.

              Happy new weeks everyone! Stay safe, and cool or warm or dry -- whichever is most desirable in your area at this time.
              Toolbox/Toolkit

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                Re: Newbies Nest

                Slo, my kids are starting their second full week. It's good so far! They need the in-person learning environment with peers. My husband has a father that taught him manipulation, conflict avoidance tactics (primarily turning it around on others), controlling behavior, and a sometimes condescending / borderline abusive tone. Amazing how fast he learned to work on these things when faced with a wife who would no longer tolerate it (me). His father, however, still behaves in all of these ways because he never had accountability. We can't change someone, but we can demand respect or leave - and sometimes they end up changing on their own. Keep to your boundaries - if you will accept nothing less than people who build you up, that is what you will have.

                G, are you a surfer?

                Pav, we have a pop-up. We were backpackers before kids, so this was the next best thing. It's almost entirely windows - so a place to be when it rains - and wonderful beds I wouldn't go as much if it weren't for my husband. One of the great things he adds to my life - being so active. We're a good team in the outdoors!

                Wags, yea for a full schedule! That balance between not enough work and way too much is thin - hope you can walk it for awhile!

                Another week, and a good workload here too. I turned down 5 projects last week because I just can't handle them, and I know it. It's amazing how nice people are when I just tell them the truth. They end up thanking me for being honest and not trying to "fit them in" and struggling. I do so much better with fewer, large projects than 15 small ones (which is what I've had for the last year).

                Anyway, best to everyone! SO thankful I'm not a drinker!!
                Kensho

                Done. Moving on to life.

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                  Re: Newbies Nest

                  Originally posted by Slo View Post
                  [MENTION=24679]Mulburry[/MENTION], I used l-glutamate chews early on to help manage the cravings when going off alcohol.
                  Thanks Slo. I'll look into that. Though I think you mean L-Glutamine? (glutamate is the last thing you'd want to add to a brain going through hyper excitation, ha).
                  Last edited by Mulburry; August 30, 2021, 12:37 PM.

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                    Re: Newbies Nest

                    Gee willickers -I haven’t heard that expression since I was a kid!

                    Sorry, [MENTION=24679]Mulburry[/MENTION]…L-glutamine. I started with capsules that you could open and pour under your tongue, but later switched to the chews. I also tried that dangerous med that makes you throw up and potentially seize if you drink on it, and also tried baclofen…don’t really recommend those two.

                    “That balance between not enough work and way too much is thin” : so true, Kensho! I’m glad both you and Wags seem to be finding a good balance right now.

                    Yup, now I know for sure that divorce is happening. I wouldn’t have known that last weekend when he was being really nice, and we rode his motorcycle together to a graduation party, and had a nice time together there. But this weekend just passed, he went back to being surly towards me.
                    Thanks, Lav. I do think that I have a good lawyer lined up, anyways.

                    I had a wonderful bike ride this morning! The weather is beautiful today. But no such indulgence tomorrow, as young daughter & I ahead up tonight to babysit the wee grandchildren tomorrow!

                    Strap in and have a safe night in the Nest.
                    Last edited by Slo; August 30, 2021, 04:49 PM.
                    Once a pickle, never a cucumber again.

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                      Re: Newbies Nest

                      Good evening Nesters,

                      We’ve had a day of sun mixed with pop-up thunder storms, weird to say the least. Wednesday will be the day for our share of hurricane Ida rain & wind. New Orleans has zero power & people trapped in their homes, very sad & scary.

                      Wags, sounds like you’re all set for the fall semester, good for you! I hope it all goes well for you.

                      Kensho, turning down work is something I did quite a few times when i had my embroidery business running. One person with two hands & one brain can only handle so much regardless of how long the work day is, haha! Keeping everything manageable is my goal these days!

                      Mulburry, I used L-glutamine in teh early days too & found it helpful to break the almighty sugar addiction I developed when I stopped drinking. We all have to do what we have to do, right?

                      Slo, that off & on again behavior makes everything so confusing, don’t you think? I felt like it was an obvious symptom of a chronically poor communicator. It’s frustrating.
                      I hope you enjoyed your day of childcare :hug:

                      Hello to all & wishing everyone a safe night in the nest!
                      Lav
                      AF since 03/26/09
                      NF since 05/19/09
                      Success comes one day at a time :thumbs:

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                        Re: Newbies Nest

                        Hi, All:

                        Slo, at least you have an answer. I think getting a counselor for yourself is a great idea. It will help you remember yourself and what you want in all this. Wishing you strength!

                        Wags, that sounds like a perfect job. Were you a classroom teacher first? How did you find your ability to teach others in that way? You get out biking a lot, right? How's your wife's hip?

                        Did I miss a Mr. G album? Congratulations! Can we buy it?

                        I've been missing Nar also. Nar? You there?

                        Your weather sounds crazy, Lav. Stay dry, cool and out of the wind.

                        Ava, I know Bob and Carl will work it out. Does Cardi figure into the mix?

                        Happy SOBER Tuesday.

                        Pav

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                          Re: Newbies Nest

                          I'm going to go stalk our pal [MENTION=1354]narilly[/MENTION]!

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                            Re: Newbies Nest

                            Good evening all Nesters,

                            We’re all preparing for weather from hell the next few days. We’re in the high risk for tornados area, lucky us. This is all remnants from the hurricane Ida. Fun times

                            I have seen Narilly pop up on my FB page recently. I guess I’ll message her & see what’s going on.

                            Not much else to report on tonight so I’ll wish everyone a safe night in the nest!

                            Lav
                            AF since 03/26/09
                            NF since 05/19/09
                            Success comes one day at a time :thumbs:

                            Comment


                              Re: Newbies Nest

                              [MENTION=1354]narilly[/MENTION] is fine, of course :smile:. Too busy with work. She promises to come visit us soon!!

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                                Re: Newbies Nest

                                Hope you don't get too much wind and rain, [MENTION=8356]Lavande[/MENTION]. The pictures coming out of LA are so sad. Life with no power or water would be hard, especially not knowing how long it will last. Little Beagle lives in that area. Hope she is ok - in all ways.

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