Newbies Nest

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good evening Nesters,

Byrdie, today is actually the last day of summmer, tomorrow we are in fall. The rain & wind yo’re having is supposed to be here Thursday, oh well.
I know you’re keeping yourself busy with sweet chocoaltey things

Belle, good to see you but I’m sorry you’re having a rough time. Being someone’s punching bag or sin eater is not fun. Time to strengthen up your boundaries. There was a time, many years ago I was known for sending my husband right out the door if he walked in grumpy & growling. It used to upset me & the kids hearing that nonsense. Look out for you, this is your time now :hug;
Stay close to the nest, we will share our collective strength.

NS, I couldn’t be happier knowing the cooler weather is almost here. I suffer too much all summer, this is my time of the year, yay!!

Wag, yep, I’m happy to throw on a jacket, grab the scarf & gloves if needed too & get my walking done. The colder air invigorates me. I’ve been like a slug all summer, haha!

Hello to everyone & wishing a safe night in the nest for all.
I just heard the bat population in Pennsylvania is on the rise & I’m OK with that becaus ethey eat all the mosquitoes the chickens miss, haha!

Lav

[wagmor]

Re: Newbies Nest

So great to see so many nesters checking in!

NS - I've come to expect that I'm doing well too, although I never ever take it for granted. I am a bit tired but my quit is solid.

Belle - that sounds terribly hard at home with your husband acting like that. Is it even worth trying to talk with him and see if you can get things sorted out? I can't remember what you've said about his willingness to engage in that kind of process. And to be fair, maybe YOU don't want to do that anyway. Based on what you've described I would totally understand that. Hugs to you. Tuck yourself into the nest and post every day.

Byrdie - holy moly that's a lot of rain for one day!!! If only we could distribute that out across all of the western US states and other regions of the world in drought.

Hellos and waves to Lav, Slo, Kensho and everyone else stopping by the nest. Hope all is well with all of you!

[Slo]

Re: Newbies Nest

It is great to hear from so many nesters! We’re still missing the Pav-Ava quit twins…I wonder if Ava is on her vacation now?

I’m back from babysitting the little grandkids. Beckett has hand-foot-mouth disease, but luckily he was turning the corner right when I got there and wasn’t quite so sick anymore. Mabel is so much fun at 4 months old, so cute & cuddly!
You’re right. Lav, my focus will be on my daughters & grandchildren now. I feel vulnerable, like I need them too much and need to draw strength from them. Well, I am helpful anyways.

Belle, I feel like a lot of my drinking was in response to the bad marriage also. Once I quit, I couldn’t handle the feelings of feeling rejected and disempowered and all of that very well. I couldn’t numb them away anymore. This is hard when our youngest ones go off to college, and we’re left with a truly empty nest!

I’ve been out & about. Went to the Van Gogh immersion show last week, went to an arts & craft fair over the weekend; went out looking at a few condos, went to water aerobics…
I’m traveling today to take my mother to a doctor appointment.

G-man, very good point that we need a foundational set-up of checking in with ourselves. I need to craft this and firm it up better so I don’t feel so unmoored.

I hadn’t quite identified this myself, but you’re right, Byrdie: my stomach is in knots.

Lav, how did your embroidery project turn out?

Onwards & upwards.

[BelleGirl]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hello...doing my morning (oops almost noon) check-in.

Slo, in the long run, how did you handle your feelings of rejection when you could not numb with alcohol. I try to stay away from hubs as much as possible to avoid his wrath. I go for walks in the evening (it seems I only do that on sober nights). Last night on my walk, around 9:30pm some lady yelled at me from her porch as to what I was doing there. I had stopped to answer a text from my niece. I told her that I was on a public sidewalk and had every right to be there. But it put me in such a bad mood. I should have told her I was "minding my own business and she should mind her own business". What is wrong with people. That is my pre-bedtime stress release. I shouldn't have let her ruin it for me, but it was just the straw that broke the camel's back. I came home and posted about it on the neighborhood app instead of drinking.

I think hubs is turning into his father who was not a nice person to be around. In fact my mother-in-law never shed a tear when he passed away...and I don't think anyone else did either...sad.

I like the Mr G-ism "if you are walking through hell...keep walking" and that is just what I'll do.

Have a good sober day/evening everyone.

[lifechange]

Re: Newbies Nest

hi Nesters,

quick check in after a long and stressful day.. it's only almost 9pm and I'm going to hit the hay as to be able to wake up and be at work by 5..
Looking forward to a weekend trip to the country side with my BF.. looking after chickens for a friend who will be away. We're going by bike and will just take books to read, go for long walks.. I will have my phone with MWO at my fingertips!
Nice to read back on all the posts and to feel connected here..
love to you all..xx

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good evening Nesters on the very first day of Autumn (at least where I live)!

Glad I got my walk in early because now we’re getting Byrdie’s rain & windy weather. I think it’s going to last all day tomorrow as well. I’m just hoping things clear up for Friday. My embroidery customer’s son is getting married outdoors Friday evening. I stitched the bride & groom’s names & wedding date on blankets that they intend to use around a fire pit after the ceremony.

Wags, honestly I think the older we get the less likely we are to put up with anyone bad mouthing us!! I know I have lightning ability to respond to an insult these days, haha!! Being insulted by a spouse is just not acceptable. We stand with Belle & Slo, right?? Hope your day was wonderful.

Slo, I’m glad to hear you are out & about, that’s great! Helping out with the grandkids is definitely a good feeling. I hope the little guy feels better soon.
The embroidery project turned out great, just waiting for the busy mother of the groom to let me know when I can meet her. It was supposed to be today. Keep looking out for yourself please.

Belle, I think of what you & Slo are going thru every day. I just want you two to tell yourselves that everything will be OK, regardless of what actually happens. I told myself that when my husband suddenly ran out a year after I quit. I think I must have exposed his flaws & he wasn’t willing to deal with them. I lived in peace for 4 years until he decided to return home because he wanted what I had - relationships with our kids & grandkids. He has calmed down & behaved himself since. Hang in there!

LC, I hope you enjoy your weekend away. I sure could use a chicken sitter if you find you like doing that sort of thing

Hello to all & wishing everyone a safe night in the nest!

Lav

[BelleGirl]

Re: Newbies Nest

hello...just a quick witching hour check in from me. All's well. Hope all is well with everyone else too!

[Mulburry]

Re: Newbies Nest

Greetings Nesters,
LC, Mulburry - hope you are both doing well & staying on plan. Let us know how we can help!

Thanks for the concern. Haven't been on here much the last few days. Bottom line is I'm still struggling (especially with the meds) but still AF. I have been keeping a detailed daily journal that I just posted in my Detox thread in case anyone's interested: https://www.mywayout.org/community/t...ml#post1800811

[Slo]

Re: Newbies Nest

The first weeks are difficult. [MENTION=24679]Mulburry[/MENTION]; there’s no way around it. But you seem to know that and are making your way through them. I do keep an eye on your detox thread. We’re pulling for you!

Interesting to hear about your embroidery project, Lav! The blankets…daughter who got married in Winter had those for the wedding party.

LC, yes, definitely need to hit the hay at 9:00p if you have to be at work by 5:00a! Sleep is such an important “tool to have in your toolbox”.

Sorry about the lady on the porch, Belle. Maybe she has had bad things happen to her, like porch pirates, so is suspicious. Maybe she can’t see very well, so didn’t realize in the dusk that it was just a walker out for a walk.

Belle, I wasn’t able to handle my feelings of rejection and resentments very well after going AF. I too would end up trying to stay away from hubs as much as possible.

After crying out a lot of tears on the evening of the full moon, I’m feeling better about and more accepting of the fact that I am getting divorced. And I hang onto the words of support that have been said to me here, that “Everything will be OK.”.

I need to get a couple bike rides in over the next couple of days as I’m doing a little organized bike ride on Sunday with sister and daughter D2. It’s harder to fit in now that the mornings are so cold, and the evenings are shorter.

Wishing all a good AF day!

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Greetings Nesters,

Well we have had 2 inches of rain so far today. We’re over 80 inches for the year & that’s a lot.
Hand rolled some homemade low sodium tortillas, turned out pretty good. I just used white flour because that’s all I had but will make some with some whole grains next. I am so sensitive to salt it’s not funny & I have. To try to help my BP.

Belle, glad you checked in today

Mulburry, I just peeked at your thread & I’m left wondering why you chose to do a home detox. You seem to have multiple things going on at once & that’s a lot to handle on your own. Just know that after these initial days things will get much better for you, be safe.

Slo, acceptance of any situation is the first step toward healing. I know a lot of people would agree with me that you are stronger than you know. It’s amazing the ways we are tested in life but we come through, you will too :hug:

Hello to all & wishing a safe night in the nest for all!

Lav

[Guitarista]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hola friends near and not so far,

Hi Belle, good to see you. Thanks for the congrat's. Don't take crap. If it's abuse it's not ok. What do i know, but what about getting outta there for awhile and examining your options with less distractions and a probably clearer head? Might currently be a hard environment to stay off the booze. Take it easy and keep yourself rolling each day towards good health.

Big waves to evabody. Surfs up round here. Yo!

[Pavati]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi, All:

I am SO sorry I've been MIA. I just have too much to do and I committed to my morning yoga which is when I used to be online. It is good for me, but now I have to figure out how to do both.

I did skim back and caught the BIG NEWS. Congratulations [MENTION=7261]Guitarista[/MENTION] - Mr. G. you are truly an inspiration. You make rocking music, you are balanced, introspective, and extremely supportive of all of us. Thanks for sharing yourself with us and being such a positive member of our sober team. You RAWK.

Here's a special hug to all of you facing shitty times with your partners. Take care of yourselves - you deserve to be treated nicely.

I am going off the grid for the weekend but will try to post more starting next week. I truly miss you all and I think of you when I'm not here.

x
Pav

[wagmor]

Re: Newbies Nest

Glad to see so many checking in again, and sorry that several nesters are struggling.

Belle - as G suggested, is there someplace you can go to get away for a short break? It must be terrible difficult to sort things out while you're in the very place that seems most stressful for you. I know, much easier said than done. That's great that you're getting out for long walks, although the interaction with your neighbor was understandably unpleasant. I hate when people are like that.

Slo - you are definitely stronger than you might feel at times. And contrary to how it might seem right now, everything *will* turn out ok even if not in a way you might imagine or picture.

Lav - the blankets sound wonderful! How fun that you got to help create part of this celebration.

LC - ok now I'm jealous -- a getaway to the country side traveling by bike = my dream right now (well, one of them!) Hope you have a wonderful time!

Mulberry - I'm really glad you checked in here. From your Detox thread it sounds like you're gradually feeling a bit better even though the past week+ has been quite uncomfortable. I remember those jitters, the anxiety, the insomnia etc from my own difficult withdrawal. Even though the meds lessen the danger of alcohol withdrawal, they certainly don't make the experience "easy" at all. I hope each day brings you closer to feeling like you're off the roller coaster. Stay safe and please keep updating here and/or on your thread.


Hellos and waves to Slo, Mr G, and everyone else stopping by the nest. Happy (almost) Friday to you all!

[lifechange]

Re: Newbies Nest

hi Nesters!

Quick check in before we head out the door.. will read back this evening, tomorrow morning, latest!
I'm a bit nervous about our bike trip! Not the biking part, but the finding the place part!:egad:
Hope everyone is looking forward to a nice AF weekend!
Hugs all around!xx

[NoSugar]

Re: Newbies Nest

I don't know who first said it, Slo, but I agree with Wags: "It will be ok in the end. If it's not ok, it's not the end". Hang in there through this awful time and I feel sure you will end up in the best situation for YOU. I hope you can get on a path to whatever the best life for you is, too, Belle.

I took a plunge yesterday. My husband is an avid cyclist. It isn't much fun for me to ride with him because I can't go as far or nearly as fast. He is very kind and accommodating but I don't like being the 'drag'. Anyway, I saw an ad for an e-bike in the paper. The woman who bought it had never actually ridden it due to health issues. I gave it a try and LOVED it. It was weird to make such a big purchase on the spur of the moment but I think I'm really going to enjoy it. Now I'll be the one who has to be nice and not leave my husband in the dust :haha:.

Have a good weekend, Nesters.