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    Re: Newbies Nest

    Pav - good to see you. Glad you were able to enjoy a lazy morning after a crazy week.

    Lav - I didn't realize that chickens could fare so well in such cold weather, but I guess it makes sense -- lots of wild birds do it without a coop to nestle down in! I hope your hen with the lame leg heals up quickly.


    Good weekend here so far. It's cold but sunny, so we went for a 2-hour walk with a neighbor friend and her dog. Our pup stayed home -- too cold for her to be out that long, even if I carried her in her little dog-carrier backpack (yes, you read that right). It seemed like almost everyone in the whole city was out enjoying the sunshine and dry weather!

    I got a new student today and tomorrow I'm talking with the mom of the potential new student (the one needing help with the college admissions test). I haven't committed to doing that gig yet -- a lot will depend on the student's needs and whether she herself has really bought in to the idea of tutoring. I'm not interested in trying to cajole anyone along.

    I think I'm safely past the weeks of temptation to drink now, and back on solid ground. SO glad I never caved. This experience reinforced what we all already know: if you get past the moment of temptation, the relief that comes from realizing your quit is intact is better than the "feel good" al was trying to convince you would come from drinking. I'm now enjoying the reward of my persistence and it feels better than a drink EVER could.


    On a totally different note, is anyone here doing Wordles???

    Enjoy the rest of your weekends everyone!
    Toolbox/Toolkit

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      Re: Newbies Nest

      Hello on a Sunday morning,

      I’m up early since I didn’t take NyQuil last night like I did on the previous two nights for my cold. That stuff’s amazing, and I sleep so deep with it! No wonder we like its ingredients, like alcohol and dextromethorphan, too much.

      Pav, that is one busy week! You need to veg this weekend.
      Wags, yes -no need to take on students who aren’t motivated. That’s the beauty of being self-employed, as you have pointed out: you can choose what kind of student you will work with.

      NS, I should try that book you are reading about the opioid crisis. Wags, never heard of Wordles! I love word games though.

      Thank you for the confirmation that it was worth it getting through the lengthy temptation period without drinking, Wagmor. It is so hard to crawl back out again once back in, so of course it ultimately is worth it.

      Went to daughter’s swim meet yesterday, with HB, and met daughter family with the babies there. I wish now that I was just staying married. I mean we’re old, and have kids & grandkids together. Ach.

      Steadfast, I hope you make the right decision for yourself with your relationship.

      Do you still have Sunday afternoon gigs, G-man? Hope it was fun!
      Last edited by Slo; January 23, 2022, 08:09 AM.
      Once a pickle, never a cucumber again.

      Comment


        Re: Newbies Nest

        Hi, All:

        Happy Sunday. Not much to report. Gorgeous weather here - cold (for here) and sunny, so about to go out on my third walk/hike of the weekend. I do love where I live!

        Wags, YES to the Wordles! I love word games that that one is a perfect amount of time and thought investment. Glad you had a nice walk, and also I love your description of having made it through those cravings. I watch sports as I think you all know, and the Warriors pulled out a squeaker that should have been a blow out on Friday night. I loved what Steph said - we have perseverance and grit to make it through the hard time. They were sluggish, nothing was going in the basket, key players injured. They could have given up, but they just kept grinding and in the end it paid off. Most of sobriety is not like that, but in those times that are, I think that is a good lesson - keep focused on your goals and keep grinding.

        Lav, I'm glad to hear that. That's what I thought but then I was second guessing myself. Happy Birthday to the entire family! Glad the chickens are ok.

        Happy SOBER Sunday, all.

        Pav

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          Re: Newbies Nest

          Greetings Nesters,

          Not much sun today but also not quite as cold. Now we’re supposed to have snow showers tonight, haha! It’s always weather whiplash around here!!!

          Wags, it’s funny the little wild birds will fly in & out of the chicken coop when I have the big door open all day. The chickens don’t seem to mind sharing space
          Glad you’re back on solid ground once again - we don’t drink

          Slo, glad you got to your daughter’s swim meet with the family. Hope you have a good week.

          Pav, nice that you had good walking/hiking weather this weekend.
          My feathered friends are happy, I even got a half dozen eggs today despite the cold.

          Hello to all & wishing everyone a safe night in the nest!

          Lav
          AF since 03/26/09
          NF since 05/19/09
          Success comes one day at a time :thumbs:

          Comment


            Re: Newbies Nest

            Slo - glad the swim meet was fun. I'm sure it's hard to look at your family through the lens of being divorced rather than married. The positives of being divorced are hard to visualize because you haven't experienced them yet. I'm so sorry you're going through such a difficult time.

            Pav - sounds like a great weekend of hikes!

            Lav - that's so great your chickens share their digs with wild birds. I would love to see that


            Pretty good weekend here. I had the phone meeting with the mom of the high schooler who needs help with the college admissions test. That went very well and got me excited. Even if this particular student doesn't work out, I'm motivated to learn a lot more about the test so I at least *can* tutor for it in the future.

            The one rough part of the weekend is that our pup had another hard night last night. Sigh. I love this little dog but I'm truly exhausted. It's so unfair that such a sweet little girl has such a challenging health issue. Of course that's true with people too. I just feel so helpless with her sometimes. It makes me incredibly empathetic for single parents and for caregivers in general.

            I can't drink. I don't want to drink. I want and need to be ready to help my family and friends 24/7.

            How about you?
            Toolbox/Toolkit

            Comment



              Congratulations [MENTION=18725]NoSugar[/MENTION]!
              Quitting and staying quit isn't easy, its learning a whole new way of thinking. It's accepting a new way of life, and not just accepting it, embracing it...
              Worry about tomorrow, tomorrow. Just get through today. Tomorrow will look after itself when it becomes today, because today is all we have to think about.
              Friendship is not about how many friends you have or who you've known the longest. It's about who walked into your life, said "I'm here for you", and proved it.

              Comment


                Re: Newbies Nest

                Cowboy, you are amazing! No one can slip a soberversary past you! I'm glad you don't know my REAL birthday :haha:.

                For the first time I forgot about this upcoming milestone until (thanks to Cowboy!) we celebrated Byrdie's. I know I'm 4 days (and 2 years) after her. It is nice not to be so focused on this not-drinking lifestyle and to have it be so normal but as we discussed, I don't want to become complacent. I no longer "feel" what my life was like but remember in a more intellectual way and need to revisit that sometimes as a reminder. What a relief it is to be able to make the sensible, logical decision not to drink! I used to make that good decision every morning and change it every night!

                Slo, if you and your husband can establish a calm, courteous relationship, there's no reason you can't in the future both attend family events and even enjoy sharing what your marriage produced. My sister and her ex did that for years, my parents stayed friendly with him, and it turned out to actually be the best thing for everyone involved.

                I'm so sorry about your pup, Wags. Ours had ear infections (probably from no air circulation while wearing that stupid post-surgery cone) and even a minor thing like that is really unsettling. Having it being a serious, recurring issue is so hard. It is wonderful that you are always there for them :hug:.

                I begin jury duty today. It is not especially great here in terms of covid so I'm hoping I don't get called in.

                xx NS

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                  Re: Newbies Nest

                  Congratulations, NoSugar, on putting yet another year between you and addiction! It is so helpful to have enough time under our belts where it is easier to make the logical, sensible decision to not drink.

                  I took NyQuil for two nights, with alcohol in it, and have also been wanting to drink one of my NA beers each day; which I normally reserve for social occasions. I need to keep an eye on this and stop. Just a drop of EtOH in my system makes me feel…complete. Need to stay away from it, since no amount of it will ever be enough.

                  Sleep is so important, Wags; and especially to us former drinkers, as part of our AF toolbox. I feel for single parents too, and for all the many other burdened caregivers out there who can’t get their sleep.
                  I’m giving Wordles a try now!

                  Lav, how did your multigrain, seed-studded bread turn out? I’m making beef stew today for daughter’s family. I’m driving up there later today to babysit.

                  Thank you, Wags, for explaining to me that I’m looking through a certain lens at the future. No, I can’t visualize post-divorce life very well in relation to family life. Ouch. Thank you, NS, for sharing that you have seen it work successfully. I’m trying again to make a list of what will be good.

                  Thinking of overworked Ava, Pav, & Belle. Hoping Kensho is faring well with the two new projects.
                  And G-man has a travel-abroad trip coming up soon!
                  Last edited by Slo; January 24, 2022, 10:00 AM.
                  Once a pickle, never a cucumber again.

                  Comment


                    Re: Newbies Nest

                    NS, happy sober birthday! 9 years, did you ever think? Seems a lifetime ago, doesn’t it. May I say that you have been a calm and steady voice here in the nest, and one that presents information from a logical and balanced perspective. We are so grateful for you. It was a lucky day for us when you joined MWO.
                    Congratulations on your big day! :welldone:
                    Byrdie
                    All you gotta do, is get thru this day. AF 1/20/2011
                    Tool Box
                    Newbie's Nest

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                      Re: Newbies Nest

                      Morning nesters

                      Happy 9th birthday NS, when i gave up drinking (thanks to your pressuring me to pick a date) i felt as if you were years and years in front of me but you must have had your "days" of struggling at one year but you were always there to lend a steady voice instead of me listening to my chaotic one. Its been a lovely journey to share with you and heres to many more. I know i feel like a grown up now and back in my drinking days i never wanted to be "one of those boring people". gladly giving up drinking does not make us boring, it makes us winners, able to achieve so much more than what we did drunk. Have a happy day and much love.

                      Not much happening here, except for work. my boss is so behind and now her mum looks as if she has slipped a disc. her parents live in Tasmania which is a 3 hour flight from here and her dad has cancer then broke his wrist and hip late last year. i feel so sorry for her as with covid she has not been able to see them or try and get them to move to the mainland. she did so some work i asked for yesterday so i have a full day getting back up to date.

                      Slo, how is your other daughter going? It feels strange when first divorced but for me it was freeing, i could finally think just about me (mind you my drinking escalated). i have never regretted leaving my husband. my best friend is married to him now and i listen to how he does nothing, how he drinks too much, how he says he is stopping smoking and hides it, how he wants to stop working as everything aches, how he spends hours on the xbox and i am so GRATEFUL, i am not living the so called dream. Sure he is a nice person but..... for me being single is great. Sure it gets lonely but you visit the kids and then appreciate coming home. You will be fine Slo and yes its sad but in time you will find your peace and happiness.

                      looks like omicron has peaked, just when we are getting the RAT tests in, ha ha. we have an election this year so now i just need to get through listening to the false promises blah blah.

                      Wags, sorry to hear about your pup being unwell again. Its been 3 years in March since my Madison Elizabeth Charlotte Beatrice died and i still sometimes think with all her health issues, visits to the vets, meds she was on daily that i would do it all again just to get a snuggle and love from her. they are so precious but look after you also.

                      well better get back to work. Oh Lav i am getting an egg a day again, Susan is a lovely girl, Karen on the other hand, is a karen ha ha.

                      take care xxx
                      AF free 1st December 2013 - 1st December 2022 - 9 years of freedom

                      Comment


                        Re: Newbies Nest

                        Greetings Nesters,

                        Monday evening here after a slightly warmer day but now they’re talking about a winter storm again this weekend, haha! I’m starting to get that urge to get back outside & work in my flower beds but it’s going to be a long time before that happens.

                        Wags, sorry to hear about your pup. It’s a shame they can’t do something to prevent this issue. I hope everything works out OK. I remember being up every night with my big Swiss Mountain dog during her final months. It was exhausting & I couldn’t even help her upon her feet due to her size. Keeping ourselves healthy & ready to help is a true blessing. All we can do is our best in these situations :hug:

                        NS, a BIG CONGRATS to you on your 9 years AF!!!!
                        I’m happy for you & grateful to have you here with us & as a friend. I hope you weren’t selected for jury duty, ugh. I was always dismissed because my husband was a police officer & I guess they figured I had a jaded opinion, oh well.

                        Cowboy, thanks for reminding us of NS’s anniversary, good job.

                        Slo, I meant to mention to you I take an herbal preparation to help with sleep. Often I toss in a couple of Benadryl too, helps me sleep but I can wake up if a grandchild is staying over, I can attend to them then go right back to sleep. I stay away from the NyQuil & things like that. Take a look at Mellodyn online.
                        The bread turned out wonderful, very good. Let me know if you want the recipe & I’ll post it here. Please remember that everything is going to be OK. Hope your day with the grandkids was good.

                        Hi there Byrdie!!!

                        Ava, I’m glad Susan has become a regular egg layer. Karen needs a good talking to haha!!
                        We were told today that we should peak mid-February & I hope that’s true. The healthcare folks need a break after 862,000 deaths since the start of the pandemic.

                        Hello to all & wishing everyone a safe night in the nest!
                        Lav
                        AF since 03/26/09
                        NF since 05/19/09
                        Success comes one day at a time :thumbs:

                        Comment


                          Re: Newbies Nest

                          [MENTION=18725]NoSugar[/MENTION] - Congrats on NINE Years!!!

                          Thanks for helping guide the nest, and all of us in it, through this sober journey. You seem solid indeed -- I can't imagine you drinking ever again -- and it's important to not become complacent as you said.


                          Our pup is doing pretty well. I think we dodged a bullet the other night. It just feels like I can never relax or let me guard down. Kind of like quitting drinking, except at least that actually gets easier with time. The scare we had the other night is a good reminder of something I actually know but seem to keep forgetting: I need to stay sober so I'm ready for anything. I've got people and pups who depend on me 24/7 and I've agreed to be ready. Since this obvious thing keeps slipping my mind, I'm going to write out some reminders of WHY drinking is non-negotiable. Hoping that if I find myself tempted again, just a quick re-read of those will get me back on course.


                          Hellos and waves Lav, Slo, Cowboy, and everyone else stopping by the nest.
                          Toolbox/Toolkit

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                            Re: Newbies Nest

                            @NS Hey, Happy 9th Sober-versary to you, NoSugar! You and I quit the same year. next year will be a decade, wow!!

                            @Wags, yes, "the relief that comes from realizing your quit is intact is better......" is so very true. That relief will always trump any fleeting satisfaction coming from drinking.

                            Take care everyone,
                            Steady
                            :love:
                            AF free since April 29, 2013

                            Comment


                              Re: Newbies Nest

                              Hi, All:

                              CONGRATULATIONS, NoSugar. When I started lurking here I was watching your first sober year before I actually quit. I related to your no-nonsense approach, and the research and science behind your quit. I admired your vulnerability and strength. Thanks for reaching back and helping when I finally decided to jump in, and thanks for continuing to be a friend on this journey. xo

                              Sorry about your pup, Wags. I think being there for my friends and family all hours of the night is a HUGE plus for sobriety. I love that I have been available in the wee hours, especially as my dad got sick a few years ago, and my father-in-law had several trips to the ER at odd times. I was always able to be the DD to get us where we needed to be. I hope your dog is ok. How is your dad doing? And your wife and her hips? All healed? You have a lot on your plate - take care of yourself as well!

                              Lav, I have never baked a loaf of bread in my life, but I think I'm going to try this weekend. I'm going full gluten, but if you have any tips or good beginner recipes I'll take them. I know I'm late to the COVID bread baking craze. We'll see how it turns out.

                              Slo, I love NS suggestions. Both of my sisters are divorced and while they are somewhat civil to their exes, only the one with younger children is actually in touch. They were both bad marriages, and neither of them really wants the ex at family events. HOWEVER, we have three close family friends who all attend all events and it works out fine also. You'll figure out what you need and want with some distance. One of my sisters read a book called Divorce with Dignity I think. It helped her a lot. I don't even cook with alcohol, and I don't drink the NA stuff for that very reason - I don't want to keep my taste for it alive. Take care! You don't drink, remember!

                              Ava, sorry about the struggles at work. I heard that they can tell by analyzing the waste water that Omicron is waning. I am supposed to be taking a trip in February. I hope we get to!

                              Happy SOBER Tuesday,
                              Pav

                              Comment


                                Re: Newbies Nest

                                Hola evabody,

                                SB! 9 freakin years eh?! Wowza. Congratulations. :heartbeat: :woohoo2::sendflowers:

                                Thanks for being here. We are very lucky to know you. xx

                                Wags, glad to hear your pup is better.

                                Keep raaawkin' Slo. And keep backing yourself. I'm on a plane next week. As long as my PC will upload pics, i'll send a few through plus commentary. That's my intention anyway.

                                Thinking of y'all and enjoy reading everyone's posts. Thanks for being here.

                                Big waves! Surf's up.

                                'I am part of all that I have met, yet all experience is an arch wherethro', gleams that untravelled world whose margins fade, forever and forever when I move'

                                Zen soul Warrior. Freedom today-

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