Newbies Nest

[Peanut]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hey G - how are you doing on this grand ride??

[available]

Re: Newbies Nest

Evening nesters

Peanut great work on nearly two weeks. I always figured that i drank heavily for ten years so if it took 10 years for my body to recover so be it. i put it through hell and i am lucky to be relatively healthy.

Shades, i hope you are well.

Jasper lost his battle on Tuesday 17th May 2022, he was 15 months old. He ended up with sepsis after an ear infection and his little body could not fight it anymore. A shock for us all, we all knew his time here was going to be short but you never think the day will happen. I am grateful we visited last week to see him and see his beautiful smile and to show we loved him. Life goes on but it fecking sucks when a little one is taken way to soon. My daughters and I will go to the funeral when it is held, its just too sad.

Trying to keep busy with work. Bob had a haircut today and looks like a grown up puppy now but definitely doesnt act like it.

Take care xx

[Slo]

Re: Newbies Nest

I hear Mabel awake in her crib, but will try to post before she cries out…

So sad & sorry about little Jasper, Ava. He must have been very premature to have such underdeveloped lungs. Thankfully you had that last visit to see him.

Glad to hear you are standing up for yourself at work, Ava, and putting boundaries up for how much you will do. The rest is paid overtime!

It’s 10 things because, if you throw out 10 things 5 days a week for 50 weeks of the year, that’s 2500 things gone!

Lav, my mother is starting to look into a corneal transplant for her eye with the scarring now, since the scar is so bad that she can’t wear her contact over it.

Peanut! Excellent work! You have a solid plan and commitment. All that walking must be helping you sleep well too. And sleep will help you heal.

Shades, thanks for being here with us.

Kensho, hope you can get in the zone with your design work.
Yes, communication was a big missing piece in our marriage. It just made it so hard.

I have both the 2-year-old and one-year-old grandchildren for three days in a row this week. It is fun seeing all their changes. Beckett is learning to say so many words, and Mabel is learning how to walk! They treated me to a steak dinner last night, for the extra day of babysitting.

We’re over the hump, Wags!

[NoSugar]

Re: Newbies Nest

The nest is FULL of positive energy! I was great to sign on and feel that.

Slo, good luck having both grandkids for 3 days in a row!! That is fun but tough. I don't mind 2 at a time when my husband is with us but when it is just me, I definitely prefer one at a time! It will be easier when they are older and have more interests in common, I think.

Belle, have you ever confronted your husband about his sabotage? That is really weird, destructive behavior. On the positive side, that is great news about your son. He must be very talented.

We are having the spring-summer-winter-summer weather whiplash here, also! We are leaving in a week or so for a cooler area. Most of the time this is fine but I don't feel like we've really had spring so would rather stay here and be warm for awhile! It will be fine once we're there but it is a lot of work to get ready to be away for 3 weeks. I can only imagine the mess of weeds I'll be coming home to!!

Kensho, I heard your area is going to have record heat today and then a foot of snow over the weekend!! Good luck with that :egad:!

I'm sorry for the losses, lack of motivation, and other challenges many of us are facing but as I deal with them, including my mother's rapid decline, my 9-year mantra keeps playing constantly in the back of my mind: "... well it's better than if I were still drinking." Like AA says, there's nothing that couldn't be made worse for us by drinking.

[KENSHO]

Re: Newbies Nest

Ava, so sorry to hear about Jasper. Makes you wonder what life is all about when such little ones are here so briefly. I guess it's just about love? So sad, I'm sorry for your loss.

2 weeks peanut? That's GREAT!! Congratulations! You should feel proud. What are you doing to keep yourself sober? Keep it up!

Slo, I'm exhausted thinking about toddlers... they are fun but definitely keep ya on your toes!! Enjoy!

NS, I'm ready for some good, solid warm too. If only we could stay at about 74 degrees.....

Sometimes I wonder what my life would be like if I never stopped drinking. It's night and day to where I am now. Every part of my life would be drowning in booze... my hair and skin would be puffy and dry, I'd feel pickled every morning, sleep would be interrupted and all time spent trying to detox, not rejuvenate or actually heal anything. I'd feel sluggish, I'd probably have some health problems that I don't have now, I'm sure I wouldn't have figured out my gluten and other dietary issues. And most of all - I remember feeling like a sad, damaged, gray, self-depreciating, narrow, stuck person focused only on that next drink. Now, my world is colorful, energetic, growing, prospering, energizing, building, feeling, grateful and joyful. It's a COMPLETE opposite existence. I am so glad I chose to stop harming myself and chose to LIVE. Obviously, it took more than just stopping drinking, but that opened the door for me to choose growth and happiness.

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good evening Nesters,

We’re gearing up for record breaking heat this weekend - I didn’t order it & certainly don’t need it, haha!!!!

G, good to see you as always

Ava, so very sorry Jasper has gone so soon. I fear he would have suffered by trying to stay longer . Prayers for him & his family and you as well :hug:

Slo, it gets very hard when you have two little ones on the move. I remember enjoying my grandkids so much at that age but was so completely exhausted by the end of the day. Good luck & have fun.
I sure hope your mom does oK with a transplant, the thought scares me. I tried wearing contacts back in the early 80’s but they bothered me so much I gave up on them. Everything is so much better these days.

NS, being away for 3 weeks sounds awesome, hope you have fun & enjoy yourself!

Kensho, I finally feel like I am the person I was always supposed to be. I guess we delayed our growth by taking up drinking as a hobby, bad choice. We need to be grateful for every single AF day!!!

Hello to all & wishing everyone a safe night in the nest!

Lav

[Guitarista]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hola nester's,

Hi Ava. So sorry to hear the sad news about Jasper. What a courageous little guy. Condolences to you and your family. Life is so ever changing and dynamic. We get to meet and spend time with beautiful little miracles like Jasper, then we turn around and they are gone. Take it easy my friend.

Good to see u too Lav. Hope y'all including the Stella are cool and comfy.

Yo Peanut! i'm enjoying the ride to be sure. I note that at present i'm weighed down, almost snowed under by bills coming at me left right and centre lol. However! I note that i am actually cool as a cucumber amid the storm and potential chaos. The difference is, rather than running away and hiding from pressure, i'm actually facing it head on and finding solutions via frank and honest calm dialogue. It's working and gotta say it's an absolute priviledge and treat to experience such pressure and coast through it rather than run. keep up the gr8 work.

Big waves to evabody.

Surf's up.

[wagmor]

Re: Newbies Nest

Ava - I'm so sorry to hear about Jasper. My condolences to all who loved him.

G - great job facing your bills etc head-on while staying cool as a cuke.


Good to see you Pav, Kensho, Lav and everyone else.

I'm back in slammed-with-work mode but the end is in sight. Everything will lighten up quite a bit around June 10, so about 3 more weeks and then I can coast for awhile. I'll still be teaching through the summer but probably about half-time.

Catch you all again tomorrow!

[Slo]

Re: Newbies Nest

We need to be grateful for every single AF day, indeed! We’re the lucky ones, as we got out and got off the hamster wheel.

G, that’s hard & frustrating to have the flurry of bills coming at you. The cost of everything is going up so much. Being AF and your other self-care measures are helping you to face it calmly and formulate a working plan.

Wags, your busy time of over-work will coincide with the end of the school year.

NS, three weeks is a long time to be gone!! That is a lot of packing.

The lilacs are in full bloom here, and everything smells so sweet! Spring is finally here. My cold is hanging on but getting better; my knee ligament has healed some, so I can get around better!; and thankfully I am on the other side of the full moon, so finally have a little energy back!

Young daughter and her sister D3 left yesterday for their long-awaited and deferred trip to France!

I am “home” now after babysitting. It was exhausting, but as a grandparent now instead of a parent, I can step away and recover!

Keep going, Peanut! It’s worth it.

[NoSugar]

Re: Newbies Nest

Kensho and Mr G, Thank you for those clear descriptions of what life can be like once we quit poisoning ourselves. xx NS

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hey Nesters,

Happy Friday to all! Hot, humid & thunder stormy here, feels like August, yuck.
This will be a good weekend for me to stay inside with the AC & catch up with things I’ve been putting off

G, glad you’re keeping a cool head. Everything can be managed with a good mindful plan

Wags, part time work for the summer sounds ideal, yay!

Slo, I’m glad you’re healing & feeling better. I’m supremely jealous of your girls heading to France, so much to see there. Have been twice but I’d go again in a flash.
I know you were tired after watching both grandkids, rest up this weekend.

NS, hello to you!

Wishing everyone a safe night in the nest!

Lav

[available]

Re: Newbies Nest

morning nesters

quick check in for me today.

thank you all for your kind thoughts. i have booked flights to go up for the funeral with my girls. we are all just taking it one day at a time. There will be a wake also and my SIL says she is not going to drink so that is good news. I would say there is a fair bit of al being drunk atm but we all know we wake up the next day and everything is still there. I know i wont drink, i would not do that to Jaspers memory but its just so hard and so wrong. Im just trying to be easy on myself and watch series of Alone and knit. its about all i can concentrate on atm. i do have to work as i will have more time off but my boss approved overtime so that is a bit of an incentive.

had a nice cool morning this morning but the day is beautiful. clean sheets on the bed and the others on the line. Made a nice batch of pea and ham soup. Son will be over next week to look after the fur babies.

Thinking of you all. take care xx

[BelleGirl]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi Everybody,

Firstly I am so sad to hear about little Jasper. My condolences to the family and all those that knew him. It is just not right when an innocent is taken from this world. I'm so sorry, Ava.

Thanks for all the nice comments about my son and his NY fashion week debut. He is redesigning some of his looks and comes up with such cool ideas I would never think of in a million years. The talent did not come from me of course (he's adopted), I wonder if anyone in his birth family in Colombia is talented like him.

Pav, the "being on the same page" thing has always been a big struggle between me and my husband. We worked with a therapist for a while on that one. One thing we have always agreed on is that if our child shows a keen interest in something (good), we don't mind "throwing time and money at it". When son was teaching himself how to sew, etc., I spent hours with him and many $ at the fabric store.

My daughter is trying to find a summer job, and just got a rejection today. I don't think she comes off as confident, even when interviewing for a pizza place job. Hubs took her out to dinner tonight and hopefully they will have a good discussion about it. Sometimes he is the best one for such conversations to help her gain confidence and learn from her experience. And it is better for me not to be around to butt-in. I'm enjoying a sober saturday night in with my pup as son is out with a friend. I'm tired and thinking about hitting the hay soon.

My best friend's Dad passed away yesterday, so she will be coming up this way for the funeral next week. It will be private like her mother's was (just this past November), but I am invited, though she said I shouldn't feel obligated, but I told her I will be there. Her dad was 92 and had lived a good life. There were funeral crashers at friend's mother's funeral, so I have been given the title of "security" to politely escort any crashers away from the funeral. Who would crash a private funeral? They did know my friend's mother, and it would have been ok if they just sat like the rest of the group, but the wife "took over the show" with a lengthy eulogy of her own, that went on and on. And then at the end of the funeral she had more to say. People!

I'm tired but it could be from all the pollen in the air here making my eyes water and feel tired. Perhaps I'll knit a little but I like the idea of a good sober sleep, especially when I don't have to get up for work in the morning.

[wagmor]

Re: Newbies Nest

Belle - sorry to hear about your friend's losses of first her mom then her dad. Even though 92 is a good long life it's still hard to lose a parent. Glad you'll be able to be there for her and as "security" although WTF about people crashing. That's just wrong.

Ava - glad you'll be able to attend the wake. I can't imagine how hard this is for everyone.

Lav - it's too early for real summer heat, isn't it? Actually I'm not sure I'm ever super excited for that kind of heat especially if it's also humid like it probably is in your area. Hope you're able to stay cool and have a nice weekend.


Today was a full day off for me but tomorrow and Monday my schedule is crazy. In some ways I'm surprised there's as much work available as there is, and on the other hand I'm incredibly grateful for it. Just trying to take things a day or two at a time and not burn out. I can see the light at the end of this particular tunnel.

My wife's best friend got a DUI citation about a week ago. She'd been at a pub with a friend and when they left she drove the friend's car cuz the friend was definitely too drunk to drive. Apparently the cops were waiting nearby in case anyone too inebriated to drive tried to do so. She wasn't really drunk but was obviously impaired enough that she shouldn't have been driving. It's a car where the headlights don't come on automatically, and since her car has automated lights she didn't really think about it but drove away without headlights on. Long story short, one evening at the pub is gonna cost many thousands of dollars and her license will be suspended for at least 90 days.

Don't drink! It's definitely not worth it for many many reasons.

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good evening Nesters,

Busy weekend for me, didn’t even post yesterday! Busy with stuff, just stuff & nothing super exciting haha!
Our son asked us out to dinner last evening so naturally we went. A day out of the kitchen for me is awesome. Just had a huge thunderstorm roll thru here, never a dull moment.

Ava, thinking of you & your family. So sorry for your loss of little Jasper. We can only hope there’s a very warm & welcoming place for the little ones when they pass. Take care of yourself :hug:

Belle, sorry to hear of your friend’s losses so close together. That’s rough on anyone!
We ended up dealing with our kids in a similar fashion. I insisted on teaching them to drive because I didn’t want them driving like a cop, Lol. He took over when there were other issues that needed to be handled with some finesse. I was more of a hotheaded big mouth in my youth, haha. The pollen has been extra bad this year, honestly!

Wags, the weather is absolutely ridiculous. My son-in-law’s niece was married in an outdoor ceremony - heat index was >100, ugh. You just don’t expect that in May, even around here.
Glad your schedule is manageable & hope the summer is easy for you. The thoughts of a DUI scared me to death so I did all my drinking at home - smart, right?? I am so grateful those days are long gone.

Hello to all & wishing everyone a safe night in the nest!

Lav